John11111

Week 1 we tried for 0 carbs to reach what they call ketosis. If your body has no carbs to burn for energy it burns stored fat for energy instead. Second week we went for 15-25 carbs a day just to make sure we had reached ketosis. From then on we did 25-50 carbs a day with lots of protien chicken, pork, eggs, etc. Linda's Low Carb Menus & Recipes - Recipes Is the main site we used for recipes they have a lot of good stuff. Id like to say our diet consisted mostly of salads with spinach, fruit, almonds(many diff flavors), chicken, steamed vegetables, steak and bratwurst, tuna, tillapia and cheese/sticks and pork rinds/flaming. Pretty much all our meals were some combination of the above prepared in diff ways. For snack craving we bought the sugar free popsicles and sugar free fudge pops, sugar free jellos with the canned whip cream and lotta fruit, egg crepes with sugar free jams were really good also. Make sure to have 3 meals a day and then make sure to have 2 good snacks between eat whenever your hungry but eat only till you dont feel hungry. If you have trouble eating to much find your basal metabolic rate mine was about 2100ish cals a day. Use any calculator online to find out yours. Then use this as a guide to keep your caloric intake at level with your bmr. This diet is not about lowering your caloric intake but starving your body of carbs so its forced to burn fat instead. Good luck to you if you decide to try it im sure you will be surprised with the results just as I was didnt seem like it could be that simple or that you could still eat so good and lose weight like that still.

I just hit my 6th week on low carb diet and wow I didnt really feel I needed to lose weight but my wife wanted to try something before we went on vacation next week. I lost 20 lbs im 6' 3" and started at 193.4 lbs, weighed myself today and im at 172.8 lbs. I have been a steady 190-195 lbs for the last 6 years before the diet. I was pretty sceptical at 1st so I am amazed at the amount of wt I lost. I didnt have a gut or anything but its cool to be able to see my stomach muscles again havnt seen them since highschool lol. Im hoping to put on a good 10 lbs of muscle but have been lax in my excercise because I hurt my back in december and keep messing it up again before it has time to fully heal. So im waiting a while before I engage in any strenuous activities.

What is it she needs time to heal from? You said she needs time to heal but not what happened? How much does she game? Are we talking about a few hours a day for fun or are we talking hardcore 12-18 hours a day? It really sounds that she has a gaming addiction. Her "guild" "clan" "team" online has replaced you it could be that they are poisoning her against you as well? It could be she is bringing things up in the past to justify her current behavior. Maybe her way of not feeling guilty about what she is doing?

I have been in many baby blessings for my 2 daughters and for close friends and family and never had a current temple recomend. You do need to have a short interview or visit with the Bishop or maybe a letter from your own bishop with there authorization. Last baby blessing for my close friend I just talked to the bishop for 30 seconds before sacrament meeting and got a few quick questions about my worthiness and I was good to go. Talk to your bishop he will tell you what he expects of you as every case may be different.

I can relate my wife had an affair with my brother for almost a year around 4-5 years ago. It happened again with my brother about 6 months ago now. She saw the bishop again was disfellowshiped and has been going to biweekly meetings with the Bishop. Everyone heals at a different pace dont measure yourself to others. I find a lot of days I do okay and other days I am depressed and angry. Even years after you have doubts and anger and bouts of depression. You question everything and worry all the time. I am still with my wife and things certainly seem better I still find it hard. At 1st its all you think about obssesive thinking sounds about right. As each day/month passes it gets a little easier and I find myself thinking about it a little less. I dont know if it will ever go away completely but I like to hope it will. Its good that your husband is sorry and taking steps towards repentance and going to meetings. This shows he has at least acknowledged what he did was wrong and is taking steps to make ammends. This is one of the hardest parts never use it against him part of forgiving and getting past it, is letting it go. If you cant let it go you will never be happy with him. Im guessing you are seeing a marriage counselor if not do so right away, we didnt the 1st time and I know how big a mistake that was now. Also pick up a book called "His Needs Her Needs." I think this book helped me so much in understanding why it happened. Read it together or alone for me understanding why my wife had an affair was a HUGE step in getting past the obssesive thinking part. Not only that but it will help you understand eachother better and help to strengthen your marriage. The best thing you can do is keep praying. On the days I am having trouble I pray, Heavenly Father will always be there for you when you need him. He better then anyone understands what your going through and what you need, have faith in him. In the end as you will hear so many times the answers and decisions from here on will come from God and yourself nobody else.

Dont worry about other people here dont run away from a place where you can get good advice and help for yourself because of other people. You will hear things you dont want to hear but a lot of us have been where you are or similar situations and the advice being given is genuine. Your wife didnt want to hear or got angry when you tried to talk about your problem. Yet you are doing the same thing now. Getting mad and angry when people point out problems they see and are trying to give you advice based on the small amount of information you gave us. Coming back at people the way you did seems hypocritical your judging them for judging you it can be a vicous circle... Looks like you got the ball rolling, I also recommend, His Needs Her Needs. There is so much in that book that every couple can benefit from. Me and my wife learned a lot from it as well and it has helped our relationship greatly. It seems like a lot of the focus now is on your relationship with the OW, make sure that your original problem is not forgotten and gets adressed.. Good luck with everything and keep with it, marriage is not easy its a lot of work. As with most things though the more work you put into it the better off it will be.

We been using the new ones also, I think the ops main argument was that the government is starting to control more and more of our lives and its wrong. Before long they will be telling us what kind of toilet paper we are allowed to use and how many sheets...

AM I the only one who saw the scam in mordorbunds reply? I hope the op is not falling victim to a scam like the one Mordorbund posted? If this is between two people who know eachother well and the arrangement is backed my people who know about these things ie an attourney etc Then I say the choice is entirely up to them. Be careful going into this something like this that seems to good to be true usually isnt true.

I always thought if my wife cheated on me it would be over hands down no doubt about it. WHen it actually happened I couldnt do it, I love her too much. Also i AM pretty sure your wife can sense something is wrong I know I did so tell her and start the repentance process.

That is a very interesting situation, I know if it were me id follow my Dad to see where he was going more to sate my curiosity more then anything else. If he is a nighguard his company might assign the night/guards duty at different locations. I know where I work we have guards at night at it is not always the same guy we hire out from a security company and they just send someone that works for them. It could be your dad is embarrased of his work as well or it could be that where he works is not the safest area to be in the first place, if it requires security its usually for a reason. Im pretty sure your mom knows or suspects already if he is saying hes going to work and he isnt it will reflect in his paychecks and amount of money in the bank. It does seem a bit suspicious but ask your self do you really want to know? Will knowing something you dont ruin the relationship and good image you have of your father? If so leave it be, you are not responsible for your father or his actions. Anyways goodluck and hopefully everything turns our alright.

I am really confused and wondering if maybe there is something else going on here with you. Have you seen a psychiatrist its possible you may have some mental disorder. You have the willpower to divorce your 1st husband whom you loved for what you felt was right but not the willpower to say no to your 2nd husband for what you felt was wrong... Also how long has your husband been addicted to porn/gambling/cheating/abusive? Place yourself in your husbands shoes he married you expecting certain things. For 9 years he has been getting the unattached, unloving, uncaring wife from what it sounds like correct me if im wrong just trying to get a better picture. From what it sounds like there is probably little to no intimacy or affection at all in your relationship? You may think he doesnt notice your feelings of disgust and repulsion but I will tell you right now you are most likely wrong. Im sure he senses every bit of it and is heartbroken to the very core of his being I know I would be. Im not trying to make excuses for your husband as what he did is wrong. Can you really blame him for seeking any type of relief physical/ emotional from wherever he could get it? Maybe his destructive behavior is a cry out for attention a cry out for ANY sort of reaction, anything to show him that you care at all? Its hard to really say anything without a clearer picture, follow the advice already given pray about it. Now this is between you and our Heavenly Father and your bishop but it was nagging me you said you are temple worthy yet whenever you kiss your husband or hug him you said you think about other men thats the only way you can get through it... this just made my jaw drop please think on that. Unonditional Love is to love someone regardless of the loved ones qualities or actions this means all the time not just for a month and then it gets too hard... It sounds to me like you never even gave trying to love your husband a chance. You are in a bad place so know we are here for you I know you are reading things you dont wanna hear but sometimes hearing what we dont want to hear is just what we need.

You can make it work if you BOTH want to. You will need God, your bishop, a marriage counselor and commitment and possibly therapy. It will not be easy it will be hard it will seem almost impossible. It is a lot of work and you both need to sit down and discuss if its something you want to do. I suggest reading the book "His needs Her needs" by Willard E. Harley. Read it alone or more helpfully together this is a great start to helping you BOTH realize what is missing and what you could do more to make your relationship work. It also goes through how you can survive an affair. After reading this tempers should be cooled enough that you can discuss whether or not you are both commited to making the marriage work its either both of you or nothing. I know you feel your mistress made you feel really good thsi is because she has taken care of your unmet needs if you were to leave you wife for her you would likely be more unhappy than you are now and she as well. There are needs that are met by your wife that maybe you dont realize and when those needs vanish and are not met anymore you will be miserable. Maybe a seperation is required for you both to see this. 1st things 1st you need to confess and admit to your wrong doings and begin your atonement. It is not hopless and although you have commited a grievous sin you are not beyond forgiveness.

Love dare is one of the books we have we are going one at a time and were saving that one for last. It mentions at the start that its not to be taken lightly and we need to be commited 100% to it. If it is to work so by the time we finish the other books and have had some time to really think things through then we will be ready to commit to it.

Time for a status update it seems Disciplinary counsel resulted in disfellowship which ws a big relief to us both. We have started marriage counseling and are continuing to work things out. Is a lot to say since I posted last so this will be a long post. 1st off reading those books has been a huge help in understanding eachother and knowing what our needs are. Seeing a marriage counselor has also been a great help we will have our 4th session in a couple weeks. The counselor has further helped us both to understand and admit to whats happened. We took personality tests and turns out my wife is a slight extrovert and I am a moderate introvert. We plugged our test results up in a marriage test and saw we had 86% compatibility which I thought was cool. We have a MD apointment to get blood work done for my wife to see if she has any imbalances that could be a contributing factor per our m.c. We also discussed the likely cause of all this and why things turned out how they did. Our m.c. explained that because my wife has been a stay at home mom starting at 18 she missed out on a essential growing process akin to a baby learning how to walk and talk. The age between 18-22/24 is a major time of growth and learning who you are. My wife at 26 has yet to really get to grow up yet or find out who she is which leads to confusion depression and destructive behaviors. Second part of it was I was not consistently providing one of the basic needs in a relationship which was conversation. Though I had the other 4 down pretty good not supplying even one can and did lead to problems. Seeing as how my wife is an extrovert conversation and a consistent adult social life is pretty important. My wifes lack of a real social life which basically consisted of hanging out with my daughters which is unhealthy chained with lack of real adult conversation set the platform for what happened. My wife latched onto her conversations albeit inappropriate which continued on into the affair. Now being aware of all this we were able to come up with a plan and steps to follow mend and heal and improve our relationship. The plan we have laid out is multi tiered and will take time. Our 1st step is to help my wife grow and become more independent. Getting her drivers liscence going to local college and taking the carreer evaluation test and starting on some classes. Reconnecting with her friends and getting back into a healthy social setting. She has strong support from her Mom and her old young womens president. Along with our Marriage counseling she also talks to the bishop every 2 weeks so she has a consistent almost weekly sit down with somebody to evaluate her/our progress. We are having family time every day now from time kids get home from school until they go to bed and setting aside 2 sometimes more hours after that with eachother talking and reading together. We have been having family home evening every week and praying together daily. We are expecting that by helping my wife grow and fixing my part of things, taking care of all the underlying problems the symptoms should go away as well at least I can only hope. It hasnt been easy things still are not perfect I still get angry but our m.c. told me that was normal and will happen for years to come as long as it happens less frequently it is my way of grieving. I shouldnt hold it in as I have been that she says is unhealthy. Could I have taken the easy way out? Sure but I didnt feel it was the right thing to do personally I think it would have been selfish. I couldnt imagine doing that to my children. Knowing that my wife was willing to work through things and was genuinely sorry and seeking repentance. I know that if we continue our work and keep to our plan that we will end up much better then we were before. Ultimately it is up to us if one or both of us gives up then I will consider seperation and divorce but until then I am more then happy to put in the work required. Bert the Lord also teaches to love your enemies.

Its pretty crazy but my Father had a similar experience to Kurt when he was on his mission. I wont go into details because its not my story to tell but seeing that others have had such similar experiences only makes my testimony stronger.

Yes, been many times where I have felt the same thing other times not felt anything. It differs from time to time but it is amazing.

Dont worry about it too much have fun meet other people. Its highly likely the girl you dated isnt interested nothing abnormal about that . What are the odds that you date the one on your 1st try? I know some people become good friends and when new people are introduced they make an effort to be polite but maybe have differing interests it could be they just dont want to be rude so let you stick around. Branch out and meet different people who have the same interests as you. It could also be there is nothing wrong and your worrying needlessly. Your new in a new place so its easy to feel uncomfortable or lost /leftout. Relax and enjoy what life has to offer you will be just fine have fun and worry about yourself and not what other people think!

I agree with the above could be a much simpler problem, it may be your husband needs to run a marathon everyone has a differnet body/mindset/emotions. The book I suggested goes into this as well among other things. It may be you are inadvertently not meeting one of his primary needs simply because you dont know it. Going through the book will help you discover all of these needs and help you as a couple to pinpoint where the problem lies ad discuss together how to better your marriage. Which could very well solve all of your problems. Please dont ignore the suggestions on the above reading material suggested by myself and others it could very well save your marriage! You can probably pick them up at the library free, I got mine used at the bookstore for under 10$ each.

Greatly sympathize for you I have been going through a similar situation albeit my wife had an affair among other things. My story is on here as well and this is a great place to come for advice and support! Probably one of the biggest helps in understanding my wife has been the book "His Needs Her Needs" me and my wife have been reading a chapter a night and the things we have gotten out of it by way of understanding eachother and our needs has been invaluable. I thought I had been doing everything I could as well but I was mistaken there is a lot I had never even thought of or thought was important. Dont know if I can quite qualify for more advice then that as I have come here myself for help but know you have our support and prayers.

Its not common for a man to have no sex drive. Talk to a doc about checking his testosterone. Testosterone is the hormone that drives libido, but it is also really important for men's health in general go with him. This might be a serious matter. He could be depressed. Has he lost interest in other things in life as well? Its not unusual for a man libido to decrease over the years but not wanting sex ever is strange. Also read "His needs Her Needs" together one of which is the importance of sex in a marriage. There is a lot more in there about marriage and it really helps alot to understand more about eachother. I recomend that book to every couple whether they are having trouble or not as it was recomended to me and has been a GREAT GREAT read for me and my wife. I think counseling and therapy may also be something to consider as there may be something else going on.

Personally id let her win this one you need save the few wins you get for something a lil more important like a new fishing rod/ bowling ball/ gun of some sort whatever your into ^^;;

As a matter of fact she did have a lot of trouble at home when she was younger. I wouldnt say anything extraordinary or way out of line but she did have a lot of trouble with her older brother and younger sister. They did argue a lot and her older brother even hit her with something which required her to have to go to the hospital and get stitches. I always took it as sibling rivalry gone bad. That and her mom was never really supportive of her at all, her mom always favored her sister and pretty much ignored my wife as she was growing up. Not only that but we battled for a long time with low self esteem. When we dated she had a very very low sef esteem and I helped her with that for a long time. I believed we had eventually got over it as I havnt really seen any of that for years now. Maybe I just wasnt looking for it though? I guess its definetly something to think about and in a way it sort of fits. SO far we still reading his needs her needs 1-2 chapters a day and it has already taught us a lot. Really opens your eyes to how in depth a relationship goes and that there is a lot to do to maintain a good one. We want to see a marriage counselor and will be something that will come up with the bishop at our next meeting. Is it a weekly therapy a one time deal?

Dunno if anyones posted before but its a great skit everyone I have showed it to has shed tears watching it.

Well 1st day I found out she decided SHE wanted to stay. I told her I would like her to but it was her decision. Instead of going home with her mom she stayed at the house. To make sure it was her choice and her mom was not influencing her decision I waited till after my big work hours. I do 2 16 hour shifts one after the other. So I come sleep for 5 hours im basically gone for 38 hours. When I got back I had got her a card and wrote her a note. Waited till my daughters were off to school. I sat on the bed and had gift bagged the books and hid them under the blanket. I told her I know its been 2 days now and that we have had lots of time to think about things on our own without the influence of each others presence. I asked her if she still wanted to make the marriage work. I let her know that it was her decision and to make in based on her wants/ needs and not to worry about me. She said she wanted to work on it. I asked her what she was willing to do to gain my trust back I took Faded and Tarnished? Advice and made a list of suggestions of things I would like her to try to do. I made sure she understood they were not demands only suggestions and whether or not she wanted to follow through with them was up to her. She agreed to everything so after we got over that I gave her the bag and had her read the card and everything. Was very emotional we sat in bed together and read through the titles and what each book would be about and made an order in which to read them. We might do some back and forth but want to focus one just one. We chose the His needs her needed, Mainly because I wanted to understand her better and why things had unfolded as they did. She wanted to understand herself better as well as me. I thought was a great choice within the 1st 2 chapters things made a TON of sense the book was almost word for word matching what had occured. I kept thinking that the whole thing was complicated and had to have deep rooted meanings/reasons but it was almost too simple. It would have been funny if the whole situation wasnt so sad hehe. We saw the bishop tonight and he was gonna pray and ponder what steps to take next I explained to him we had already gone over the most likely courses that would occur, with a disciplinary counsel and what all that entails and I said I was willing to accept whatever happens and help my wife to move on. So I can see light at the end of the tunnel and the light feels good. Its gonna still be a long walk through the darkness but without all the uncertainty and with the help of everyone here I think we will be ok. To anyone who reads this in the future, I know it feels terrible and you are confused. Try not to make any rash decisions until some of the grief and confusion has lifted. I know A LOT of the stories and responses on here might make things sound hopeless for you. Give it a little time and be open to the suggestions of others and dont focus too much on any single response. -gonna edit op to include this some people dont go past the 1st page and I feel it may help others in the future-

SO i went out and bought all three of the listed books. I dunno why I guess it felt right? After I bought them I felt at peace after the last 5 days which have been really rough for me it was nice. I still have doubts now and the feeling of peace isnt as strong and doubts are creeping back but I cant forget about the feeling I had when I walked out of the store with those books. Im still worried but I have somewhere to start, I guess I wanted someone to show me something I was blatantly doing wrong I guess I wanted a reason for what happened. Maybe if I had a good reason I would feel better and I could take some of the blame. We got a long way to go and im glad I have people here I can lean on for support.