Really sad...

[Moksha]

I feel really down today to find that one of my best friends in the world, who is an extraordinary person, turned in her Temple recommend to her Bishop. She did this as the result of the politicking in the recent election. She said the people in her ward were saying the most horrible and ridiculous things about President Obama and she was dismayed by the Church getting so deep into politics with Proposition 8, with a position that upset her.

I really care for her wellbeing and I want to be helpful and supportive, so I do not want to say anything at all that her decision might be hasty. I just let life's absurdities role off me like water on a ducks back. It is harder for her since she is a person of great compassion and desire to do what is right.

I feel sad because she was the one who through another discussion board, encouraged me through her example of what a truly good person could be, to become much more active in Church. I am not very good about letting the water roll of by back when it comes to someone I admire. Did I mention that I feel really sad. Really sad.

Please help me understand and cope with this better.

.

[countrygirl66]

One of my best friends has a life that is in constant chaos. It is easy for people to say if you would just do ??? then things would be better. Because of this she has quit church for now. I am still her friend and I love her for who she is. I hope that someday she will come back. I think sometimes it takes a while to realize that (I think Brigham Young said this) there are a lot more members than there are saints. Maybe when she has let some time go by she will soften. If not you know that you both share a strong belief in God and the kind of life you both want to live. Good luck.

[Elgama]

I really understand your friend - I said I felt like doing the same to my husband, and I don't live in the US so do not need to encounter it every Sunday, here politics stays well and truly out of our church meetings beyond the odd friendly discussion, I have never seen anyone villified for their views also we tend to hold the right to a secret ballot more closely (why our exit pollls are not as accurate as yours lol people lie). Some of the comments on the board recently to me as a Brit feel anti freedom and anti democracy, I remember saying to my husband after visiting and seeing things in the US how it felt suffocating in comparison to where I live. I had to keep reminding me I was a Church Member because God wanted me here and I had to fight the feelings like others on the board not to feel ashamed to be LDS - I found the way some Church members conducted themselves over Prop 8 to be unChristlike and devoid of spirit whilst at the same time they were doing it because of the message the prophet sent... but me thinks the spirit of the campaign was not completely what he intended.

If you like you can PM and I will give you my email for her. The one thing she is missing is the Church is worldwide (which can be hard to see sometimes), and that most LDS did not behave or act that way.

-Charley

[Mirium]

Pray for her, love her and be there for her.

[rameumptom]

In a previous stake I was in, I was standing next to the Stake President at a function when a member of the stake handed him his temple recommend and said he couldn't support him anymore, because he was chosen to be the new custodian of some of the buildings.

The stake president sighed and told him he'd talk with him later that evening after the function. What the brother didn't understand is that the stake president had nothing to do with selecting the custodian.

We need to be careful that our frustration with others does not lead us to stop believing and following the prophets. A bigger question for each of us is: what are we doing to ensure we ARE following the prophets? Or are we glibly following them whenever it is convenient, only to be personally outraged when it isn't?

Humility is going to be a big thing for all of us to learn over the ensuing decades, as Zion and Babylon separate further and further.

[Islander]

It is certainly sad and unnerving to see our friends and family to deal with difficult issues. It is hard to watch, at times helplessly as one of our friends struggle with a principle or issue in their lives. We watch and pray that they will have the faith to endure the time it takes to understand the challenge.

This is one of those times when the Lord thru His prophet has asked us to stand behind Him to do the work, not just say that we believe in Him and in His revelation as spoken by His prophet. I rather not go on a long post in regards to this but it may be profitable to illustrate:

"And it came to pass that I was constrained by the Spirit that I should kill Laban; but I said in my heart: Never at any time have I shed the blood of man. And I shrunk and would that I might not slay him....And it came to pass that I was aconstrained by the Spirit that I should kill Laban; but I said in my heart: Never at any time have I shed the blood of man. And I shrunk and would that I might not slay him".

"And it came to pass that the Spirit said unto me again: Slay him, for the Lord hath delivered him into thy hands---

"And now, when I, Nephi, had heard these words, I remembered the words of the Lord which he spake unto me in the wilderness, saying that: Inasmuch as thy seed shall keep my commandments, they shall prosper in the land of promise."

I submit that, it comes a time when the Lord may ask that we do something that may seem counter intuitive, out of character, highly unusual, burdensome and even hazardous, for the sake of the Gospel and the kingdom. Imagine Nephi, a 17 yearold young man, always faithful, always obediente and righteous. In what seems like an unthinkable situation, the Lord commands him to kill another man. Most have no idea what it is to plunge a knife into another human being's flesh, strike a blow and decapitate or sever a limb. Most people will never be commanded to kill anyone. We may never have to leave friends and family to never see or speak to them again, or leave our homes, property and memories behind for the sake of the Gospel as in times past. Imagined how Nephi felt, his anguish and struggle. But obey he did and then later the Lord revealed to him the purpose of the work of death he faithfully carried out, even if it made him sick to his soul.

This time, the Lord simply pointed to a principle long ago descided and asked us to stand with Him and be counted among those who serve Him. Doubt, confusion, uncertainty are normal human reactions. It is in cases like this that ALL He requires of us is faith.

Edited November 15, 2008 by Islander

[mightynancy]

I'm sorry, Moksha.

I've had my troubles with the Church, but I keep plugging away - it was always administrative type things. I just reminded myself of the truths of the gospel. It was good in a way, because it often drove me to the temple.

[applepansy]

30 years ago I worked with a woman who stated emphatically that if Ezra Taft Benson ever became President of the Church she would leave the church. She disagreed with his politics. When he became the prophet and president of the church and I no worked with her and don't know her response at the time. However, she's still a member today.

applepansy

[Kirajo]

No one is unbreakable. Even the ones with the strongest testimony can fall. However, for something like politics it leads me to believe her testimony was shakable from the beginning or maybe she's been having doubts and other issues before this. All you can do is love her. The decision she's making may lead her to THINK she's truly happier, but you will witness her falling more and more. She needs you more than ever right now and she's lucky to have a great friend like you that cares for her.

[Moksha]

I want to thank you all for your advice on this matter. Thank you. Feeling better now. No doubt the Universe is unfolding as it should.

[japacific]

Maybe she was right to do it, maybe she was wrong. I admire her for following her convictions. Theres so many things I want to take a stand on but don't have the guts most of the time.

[the_last_gunslinger]

I can really empathize with her to some degree. I was deeply upset to the point of being literally sick to my stomach after learning of our involvement in Prop 8. I kind of thought that went against our whole politically neutral thing.

On the other hand, I don't feel it is something to leave the church over or even turn in the recommend. She might not have supported the First Presidency in this action, but they are still representatives of God and whether our involvement came from God or not, I don't think this action diminishes that fact, and I kind of doubt she does, either.

Hopefully, after some time to think it over, she will have a change of heart. I'm still kind of irritated by it, but I don't let it bother me anymore.

Edited November 19, 2008 by the_last_gunslinger

[Still_Small_Voice]

I can see why the church took a stand on definition of marriage concerning the law. The family is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. The family unit is fundamental not only to society and to the Church but also to our hope for eternal life.

When the prophets take a stand for something, I find great wisdom in following their counsel. I would hope that any struggling with this issue would pray to Heavenly Father and seek His counsel regarding this matter.