HELP!! {not sure if this is the right place}

[chelsea-marie]

Hi,

Ok, so I guess this is more of a question than a statement.

So here's the deal. My fiancee was previously married and sealed in the temple. He is currently going through the legal divorce but how do you divorce someone from the temple for etirnity. Neither of us really want to spend etirnity with his ex-wife.. but we don't know how to go about a divorce from the temple.

We're due to get married this Summer shortly after the legal divorce has come through. But we'd like to get the latter sorted as soon as possible as well. Any advice, suggestions, information would be greatly recieved.

Thanks

Chelsea-Marie x

[Gwen]

he needs to talk to his bishop, there is some paperwork he will need to fill out. just so you know he won't be sealed to his ex for eternity even if he doesn't fill out any paperwork. if a covenant can't/won't be lived here you will not (nor can you) live it on the other side. a divorce makes it pretty clear you either can't or won't live a covenant here and is sufficient to null and void any sealing covenant.

hope that helps.

[Wingnut]

Unless there are some extreme circumstances, it's doubtful that his sealing will be canceled. Men can be sealed to multiple women, so there is no need to cancel his previous sealing.

[L_and_P21]

also from what i heard and understand, our Heavenly Father has the last say on it. again thats just what i have heard. remember he knows the truth of all things.

[AngelLynn]

Unless there are some extreme circumstances, it's doubtful that his sealing will be canceled. Men can be sealed to multiple women, so there is no need to cancel his previous sealing.

I've heard of this as well and it's only the women who are divorcing a man who has to go through the complicated affair of having a temple divorce as women can only be sealed to one man.

[Hemidakota]

Hi,

Ok, so I guess this is more of a question than a statement.

So here's the deal. My fiancee was previously married and sealed in the temple. He is currently going through the legal divorce but how do you divorce someone from the temple for etirnity. Neither of us really want to spend etirnity with his ex-wife.. but we don't know how to go about a divorce from the temple.

We're due to get married this Summer shortly after the legal divorce has come through. But we'd like to get the latter sorted as soon as possible as well. Any advice, suggestions, information would be greatly recieved.

Thanks

Chelsea-Marie x

I suspect this divorce is based personal problems with the wife? The only way this sealing be null and void is by the First Presidency. No one less than that have the authority.

If you are married, I would not lower your standard for a civil marriage but go after something that is eternal and long lasting. Good luck...

[tubaloth]

The bishop has paper work for the cancelation is sealing.

The reason why and so forth. It has to get approved by the First Presidency so it does take some time.

[Maxel]

chelsea-marie:

I am sorry for the pains which you and your husband are going through. My parents went through the same thing, albeit it was my father who was irresponsible and neglected his marriage covenants.

Living up to a temple marriage is to live a marriage that is celestial. If, for whatever reason, a marriage does not last throughout the earthly lives of two married in the temple, it makes no sense to assume that the marriage will continue in the eternities. There is a power on this earth to nullify sealings.

Also, the best place for this would probably be in the 'Advice' forum.

[Just_A_Guy]

So here's the deal. My fiancee was previously married and sealed in the temple. He is currently going through the legal divorce but how do you divorce someone from the temple for etirnity. Neither of us really want to spend etirnity with his ex-wife.. but we don't know how to go about a divorce from the temple.

Think of the relationships established by the temple sealing as a triangle, with two points being the parties to marriage and the third point being the Lord. The lines represent a covenant between any two parties.

So, there is a bond not only between the husband and the wife, but between each party individually and the Lord. In your fiancee's case, the bond between husband and wife is already broken--it was broken when one or both culpable parties failed to keep the covenants he/she had made in the temple.

However, subject to repentance, the bond between each party and the Lord still exists. That is why the Church makes it so hard to get a "temple divorce". In the eyes of the Lord, your fiancee and his ex are already divorced (or will be, when the legal procedures are done); they need not worry about being "stuck" together in the Resurrection. What the "cancellation of sealings" does is to dissolve the parties' bonds with the Lord. (Not all bonds--it's not like they get excommunicated or anything--but the parties are no longer entitled to some specific blessings promised to them in the temple.)

It's not advisable to do sever that bond with the Lord until/unless one party or the other is ready to make a new covenant (i.e. has found a new partner, and wishes to marry again in the Temple).

[chelsea-marie]

We're not married yet.

Also, I live in the UK, so legally we have to have a civil service as well as a sealing.

His ex-wife got ex-communicated for numerous counts of adultery, would that void it?

[Gwen]

it probably has, i would talk to the bishop, if she has been excommunicated it will make things much smoother.

[Maxel]

I think their sealing to each other is most definitely broken, if she committed adultery numerous times.

I would listen to Just_A_Guy's words on the matter- they hit the nail on the head, IMHO.

[chelsea-marie]

Thank you so much. I just didn't want to get sealed to him once my reccomend comes through and find when the time comes I have to spend eternity with her.

[Maxel]

I recant, in part, what I said about this being on the wrong forum. Although this topic may very well go in the 'Advice' forum, it is not out of place in this one, with the stated purpose of discussing the 'preservation of marriage between a man and a woman'- which I assume would also include individual cases relating to marriage.

Edited February 5, 2009 by Maxel

[Madriglace]

If the ex wife has been excommunicated the sealing has been broken ... however it is wise to speak with your bishop who can go to the Handbook to get it straight from the GA. If the ex wife repents and is rebaptized the question would be does the temple work need to be redone or is it reinstated? Better safe than sorry. Congratulatons on finding your eternal companion.

[john doe]

I've moved the thread.

[ruthiechan]

I have heard though that if she were to be rebaptised she'd return to her former state, including the sealing to her ex. . .

[chelsea-marie]

Ooh thats not good. Temple divorce here we come! We've got a ward activity tonight so I may talk to Bishop then if he is there but I think he's going on holiday..

[Gwen]

I have heard though that if she were to be rebaptised she'd return to her former state, including the sealing to her ex. . .

even if that's true the divorce and subsequent marriage make that covenant impossible to live, by her own choosing, therefore she will have no right to that covenant or blessings that go with it in the eternities.

[sweetandsour]

My uncel went through this. his wife was unfaithful and stoped doing her part. he then found a new wife who has made him very very happy. but for there strangeth and happieness he got his previouse mariage sealing unulled yes he had to go talk to the bishop and it had to be confermed by the first presidency....to my recolection though his recomend was caceled and he couldnt get another for a little while...but i could be mistaken i mix things up alot. so i would for sure check cuz u would want your fieanca to be able to still get sealed to u :)

[chelsea-marie]

Grrr! Bishop was on holiday so I didn't get a chance to speak to him. But I want to get this sorted as soon as possible.. =)

[Just_A_Guy]

I have heard though that if she were to be rebaptised she'd return to her former state, including the sealing to her ex. . .

Ruthiechan is correct in that rebaptism entails a "restoration of blessings", but even if that restoration did include a temple marriage it could not overrule the agency (ability to choose one's own actions) of another person.

In other words, your fiancee's ex can't re-ingratiate herself into your fiancee's eternal life unless he allows her to. If he's still holding out hopes of spending eternity with his ex, then frankly you two probably have a lot more pressing issues to resolve than speculating about who will be with whom in the resurrection.

[Guest Ceeboos_Boss]

Unless there are some extreme circumstances, it's doubtful that his sealing will be canceled. Men can be sealed to multiple women, so there is no need to cancel his previous sealing.

Why are men allowed to be sealed to multiple women? What about women are they allowed?:

[Hemidakota]

We're not married yet.

Also, I live in the UK, so legally we have to have a civil service as well as a sealing.

His ex-wife got ex-communicated for numerous counts of adultery, would that void it?

Yes I know about the civic laws that are required to be done since my mother was born in London England, it was a statement in not seeking anything less than what the Lord can do for you. You have great potential...

Unless the First Presidency made it NULL & VOIDED, then no. He needs to talk to his local bishop to submit paperwork to Salt Lake [via the Stake President/Area President].

[Hemidakota]

Why are men allowed to be sealed to multiple women? What about women are they allowed?:

Good question....ask Heavenly Mother on the whys.

It is do to the male pride and not enough for the many faithful sisters to inherit the Celestial Kingdom. It would not be fair them in being rejected in not sitting down with our Heavenly Parents and our beloved Elder Brother, Jesus the Christ. Isaiah saw it in a vision and spoke on this very subject [paraphrase...seven women will take hold one man...].