tanuvasamama Posted February 12, 2009 Report Posted February 12, 2009 Here's an interesting twist. You know you're an East Coast Mormon if.....You were the only Mormon in your graduating class in high school.A trip to the temple involves a bus, bagged lunches, and hotel reservations.It takes you more than 15 minutes to drive to church and more than an hour to drive to the Stake Center.Your ward takes up more than one zip code.Your stake takes up more than one county.You don't eat green jello religiously, nor do you know any mormons who do.You visit Salt Lake and think "Wow, that temple is small." (If you've been to the DC Temple, you know what I'm talking about).You would never, EVER, consider the idea of getting married before you finish college.The missionaries in your ward don't ride bicycles.People are actually being genuinely curious, not antagonistic, when they ask you weird questions about the Church.Utah Mormons view you as a flaming liberal and you view Utah Mormons as total whack-jobs.Oh my gosh, this is all SOOOOOO true!!! This is the funniest of all. And all the Utah mormons are probably scratching their heads. Wait, do they even know that the rest of the members call them that? Quote
tanuvasamama Posted February 12, 2009 Report Posted February 12, 2009 You might be a mormon if you can't figure out why everyone thought the language in Napoleon Dynamite was so hilarious. You might be a mormon if you tell your kids to line up and they all automatically fold their arms. Quote
Wingnut Posted February 12, 2009 Author Report Posted February 12, 2009 You might be a mormon if you can't figure out why everyone thought the language in Napoleon Dynamite was so hilarious.Are you kidding? The only people I know who like that movie are Mormons. I can't stand it. Quote
Bookmeister Posted February 12, 2009 Report Posted February 12, 2009 If you subscribe to more than one "Country Living" type of magazine... If, after having (insert your number here) kids, you still think the little ones in the next pew are cute.... If you have ever walked out of a movie in the first ten minutes... If you actually tried counting all the mirrors you could see in the reflection when you were being sealed... If you answer all of the temple recommend questions just after saying, "Hello, Bishop...." If you fret over wondering if finding a dollar bill means HF gets a dime..... If the first thing you do when you see a new female member of the ward is look at her left hand (of course, this applies only if you're single...and male)... If you leave sacrament meeting ten minutes early just to turn up the heat in the relief society room... If you have your bishopric, quorum leaders, and home teachers' phone numbers in your cell phone....on speed dial.... Quote
gigi Posted February 12, 2009 Report Posted February 12, 2009 Are you kidding? The only people I know who like that movie are Mormons. I can't stand it.:I live in Vegas and all the teenagers were absolutely N.D. fans. Although the movie was semi-lovably LAME (shallow and plotless), it was so refreshing to hear quotes that were not offensive ('cept maybe to your IQ) in the halls at school. Quote
sakuragirl Posted February 12, 2009 Report Posted February 12, 2009 Are you kidding? The only people I know who like that movie are Mormons. I can't stand it.You may be mormon if you know that Jon Heder is a mormon Quote
hordak Posted February 12, 2009 Report Posted February 12, 2009 Are you kidding? The only people I know who like that movie are Mormons. I can't stand it.Another Napoleon dynamite hater:clap:My theory is that it is like "the emperors new clothes". Quote
Jenamarie Posted February 12, 2009 Report Posted February 12, 2009 If you leave sacrament meeting ten minutes early just to turn up the heat in the relief society room...This is so our building! The RS room is always either ice cold or burning hot. We joke that it's so the older women going through "the change" will always feel comfortable. Quote
pam Posted February 12, 2009 Report Posted February 12, 2009 Are you kidding? The only people I know who like that movie are Mormons. I can't stand it. What????? You could drink whole milk if you wanted to. Quote
AngelLynn Posted February 12, 2009 Report Posted February 12, 2009 Another Napoleon dynamite hater:clap:My theory is that it is like "the emperors new clothes".I knew it existed, I actually had a Catholic friend in one of my classes recommend that I watch it. lol I did and I hated it.Anyway.... You might be a Mormon if your idea of New Years is sitting in front of the tv set watching New Years and drinking ginger ale and Sparkling Grape Juice. You might be a Mormon if your favorite cable/satlite stations are BYU TV and BYU Radio Network. You might be a Mormon if the highlight of the conversation is how BYU or the Utes did at a game. You might be a Mormon that if you live in Nauvoo you have it written in white paint. Go Utah Jazz instead of the Chicago Bulls. (True story this one is, as I went on a church history tour and during that time the Basketball playoffs had The Bulls against the Jazz. A group of us were walking around Navuoo and I saw a car painted with that and my jaw droped.) lol Quote
Casslan Posted February 12, 2009 Report Posted February 12, 2009 You might be Mormon if you consider being on time is really being 5-10 minutes late If you book a ride or are going to meet with a friend who's Mormon, allow a good fifteen minutes extra to allow for Mormon time. Quote
TheyCallMeMom Posted February 17, 2009 Report Posted February 17, 2009 You might be a mormon if you have 8 children all under the ages of 9.I have 7 plus 10 years and under :) Quote
ADoyle90815 Posted February 17, 2009 Report Posted February 17, 2009 ...if you love your mommy and daddy.That's not just a Mormon thing, just so you know. You might be Mormon if when you talk about the "Y", you mean BYU and not the YMCA. You might be Mormon if you bought Dish Network because it has the BYU channel as part of the basic service. (In my area, that's the only way to really get that channel) Quote
AngelLynn Posted February 17, 2009 Report Posted February 17, 2009 You might be Mormon if you bought Dish Network because it has the BYU channel as part of the basic service. (In my area, that's the only way to really get that channel)Yea my mom was very excited we went Dish so we could get BYU channel. Quote
Wingnut Posted February 18, 2009 Author Report Posted February 18, 2009 ...if you love your mommy and daddy.That's not just a Mormon thing, just so you know. That was my initial thought as well, but I think that Nancy is referring to little children bearing their testimonies in Sacrament meeting: "I like to bear my testimony. I know the Church is true. I love my mom and dad. Name Jesus Christ, Amen." Quote
lusciouschaos Posted February 18, 2009 Report Posted February 18, 2009 I held a little contest on my personal blog. The winner and one of my favorites: You might be a mormon if … you go on suvivor and keep some pants on the entire time. (from my 11 year old son) …you ask your child “What’s the name of the president?” And she says, “Thomas S. Monson.” Quote
gigi Posted February 18, 2009 Report Posted February 18, 2009 (This year's Mormon on Survivor has already been running around in the absolute buff!) You might be a Mormon if you think of revelations when you hear the term D&C....I'm just sayin' Quote
lusciouschaos Posted February 18, 2009 Report Posted February 18, 2009 I was hoping this years Survivor Mormon would represent us well. I was a little dissapointed but trying not to judge. Funny how we employ Mo-dar to determine which reality show contestants belong "to the faith." I truly hope he shows some integrity in the process since they have billed him as a returned missionary. Quote
recon Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 · Hidden Hidden You might be Mormon if you are extremely judgemental and think you are better than everyone else
AngelLynn Posted February 18, 2009 Report Posted February 18, 2009 You might be a Mormon if....you buy tickets for a game that is facing off against BYU. Seriously though, BYU is playing my University's basketball team this weekend and I bought tickets so I could cheer for my Alma Mater. I am going to be doing a lot of neck turning to see who in my ward is going to be also going to the game. Quote
Guest missingsomething Posted February 18, 2009 Report Posted February 18, 2009 I guess I'm not a true Mormon then. I HATE being late.Mormon-Standard Time30 min past every scheduled event Quote
Guest missingsomething Posted February 18, 2009 Report Posted February 18, 2009 (I didnt read the entire thread...sorry if any repeats) If you have a Mission fund and not a College Fund.... ...If you drive a passenger bus as your family car.... .... if you know that you are an 8 cow wife.... ....if you still write postal letters on Sunday... ... if you dont watch TV, because its too commercialized (yet you spend 5 hrs a day on the net) ... if you carry 5 tote bags to church ... if your hair is molded into a perfect long do, held back by a large barette. Quote
Guest SisterofJared Posted February 18, 2009 Report Posted February 18, 2009 ... If your "seminary building" was your Bishop's living room.... If you packed a lunch to take to Stake Conference.... If your wedding and reception were a week apart.That's not just east coast.... I grew up in New Mexico... anywhere there is not a temple, it is pretty common to have the reception a week after the wedding. Of course, with more and more temples being built.... that is happening less!We always took a lunch for stake conference.... or bought boxed lunches at stake conference.My kids have gone to seminary is lots of front rooms.... all western US. Quote
Guest SisterofJared Posted February 18, 2009 Report Posted February 18, 2009 Oh Grits.... the reason for the phrase Mormon Standard Time... why we have a reputation for being late.... the huge families! By the time you dress 13 kids and get them to church... you're late! It's a challenge. I found that by the time I had the last kid ready (and my family was small, only 8 compared to earlier lds families) one of the first kids dress would be dirty and I'd have to start over again. Getting to church on line with a large family is a real challenge. Hence Mormon Standard Time. Big families are shrinking, maybe being late is going away, too. ? SoJ Quote
Tarnished Posted May 28, 2009 Report Posted May 28, 2009 You might be a mission field Mormon if: You drive 30 min or more to get to church on Sunday You drove 30 min or more to get to early morning seminary You have attended early morning seminary at a different location each year and the number of living rooms out number the number of chapels You have two wedding receptions for all of your non member friends and family Your friends keep caffeinated soda for themselves and non caffeinated soda for you A multi-Stake dance takes an hour or more to drive to You bring your non-member friends to a stake dance and they outnumber the members there Your ward boundaries take in five or more school districts You send the missonaries to visit all your neighboors because none of them are members Quote
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