xoomer Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 So, being a new member of the church.... I have been to church and the missionaries have been trying to convince me to go to the Singles wards and institute and stuff like that, I have a pretty Hectic Schedule... and My nights are pretty much taken up with work. well there is this girl, she is also a new member, and I actually rather like her, I'm shy but We have kind exchanged numbers... So I'm wondering if I would be out of line to call her and ask her out to eat or something? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 Of course not! GO FOR IT! And good luck! One advice... be yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest missingsomething Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 NO call now! And say a prayer first Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honor Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 Um, that's what exchanging #'s is for! If she gave you hers (and it wasn't because you're her home teacher and you snagged it off the ward list) she wants you to call! Good luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xoomer Posted August 13, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 Actually, she handed me her phone and told me to put my number in it.(this was after I Blurted out that I thought she was cute while talking to her Smooth) and then when I missed Institute she called me and scolded me for not coming. and was talking to me about a couple of things... So that is how I got her number.. I tried calling but got her voice mail... so I'll try again another time or wait until Sunday. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moksha Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 Call again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jbs2763 Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 maybe text? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest missingsomething Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 Yeah text... but if she doesnt have text... no no CALL AGAIN!!!! dont wait for sunday man. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xoomer Posted August 13, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 I'll call before I go into work tomorrow... but what do I ask her? um... can i borrow a cup of sugar? I don't know.. BTW: I turned off texting it was to expensive.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxel Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 xoomer:She digs you, man. Give her a call at the most convenient time. Be yourself- the 'yourself' you want to be and become; the 'yourself' that's on his best behavior and striving to be like Christ. With that said- carpe diem! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xoomer Posted August 13, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 My question is what is proper etiquette for LDS member Especially new MEMBERS to we were both baptised this summer I was May 30th and her just a couple of weeks ago.. I can't really use my old pickup lines Like Would you like to go out for coffee? Would you like to go out to the bar? or the most common, **When you gonna let me tap that ** that was a joke.. I would never use that.. it was just something I saw online. and thought was rather funny! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jbs2763 Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 how about a milkshake? that was my coffee shop replacment Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FairChild Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 It's summertime and perhaps a picnic in the park would be a wonderful summertime activity for you both. Call no matter what you do. It's a wonderful opprtunity to make a friend and friends are a wonderful gift meant to be enjoyed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gatorman Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 xoomer:She digs you, man. Give her a call at the most convenient time. Be yourself- the 'yourself' you want to be and become; the 'yourself' that's on his best behavior and striving to be like Christ. With that said- carpe diem!Well, at this point, you have the same issues non members do. You don't know what she likes to do, where she likes to go, etc. Unless you do. Being members or soon to be members removes some of the choices, for the better, but, it does not change dating THAT much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hemidakota Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 So, being a new member of the church.... I have been to church and the missionaries have been trying to convince me to go to the Singles wards and institute and stuff like that, I have a pretty Hectic Schedule... and My nights are pretty much taken up with work. well there is this girl, she is also a new member, and I actually rather like her, I'm shy but We have kind exchanged numbers... So I'm wondering if I would be out of line to call her and ask her out to eat or something? Why not? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 I wish I was a boy. It's really frustrating when I find somebody I like and has to wait for him to call me! Okay, like when I met my husband... we were at the bar (long story), I immediately liked him on the spot, he was playing hard to get and wouldn't sit down long enough so I can figure out a way to hand him my number. So, I left! Well, luckily, he was interested in me enough to chase me down the freeway to get my number... If I was a boy, I would call the girl, tell her on the first phone call I am interested in getting to know her better and ask her what she normally does on Friday nights. If she says, I normally go to the movies with my girl friends, I would say, "Can I come?". Or if she says, I normally just stay home and do laundry, I would say, "Can I help?"... etc. There is nothing more awkward for me than to have to figure out how to act and what to say on a dinner/eat-out date, trying to impress somebody, and trying to make sure I don't slurp the soup or smear sauce on my nose... for at least 2 hours! Also, one-on-one time may not be the most comfortable, so a group "hang-out" time is preferable where you're doing normal friends stuff and really getting to know the other person by observation in natural surroundings instead of getting piled with a lot of "just to impress you" unnatural jibberish! But then, I'm a girl... so what do I know? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 It's really frustrating when I find somebody I like and has to wait for him to call me!Except you didn't, not technically, though I understand what you are getting at. Aren't cultural expectations fun? Personally I'd love a girl to ask me out.If I was a boy, I would call the girl, tell her on the first phone call I am interested in getting to know her better and ask her what she normally does on Friday nights. If she says, I normally go to the movies with my girl friends, I would say, "Can I come?".I suppose dating etiquette is different than the standard kind, I was raised that such is inviting yourself somewhere which isn't considered 'kosher'. Of course you have more experience on the subject than I by a long shot.Or if she says, I normally just stay home and do laundry, I would say, "Can I help?"... etc.I could see that at a laundry mat, actually inviting yourself to be alone with her inside her house as she folds her underwear is not something I would have expected to be 'kosher'. Of course my dating experience (and asking out) to date consists of thinking up reasons not to, this is most likely just more of the same. The thought process, namely trying to find something that interests her and a little more original than dinner at Denny's does seem golden, even from my phobic and limited perspective. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ryanh Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 My question is what is proper etiquette for LDS member Especially new MEMBERS to we were both baptised this summer I was May 30th and her just a couple of weeks ago.. I can't really use my old pickup linesCall the ward mission leader, elders quorum president, or even the Bishop and ask for the name of someone that would be willing to go on a double date with you. Kill two birds with one stone - alleviate fears of "etiquette" and the dreaded first date silence. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beefche Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 Guys, guys, guys!!! Just ask a girl out! Especially when she gives you her number and called you already. To the OP, she digs you, man! Call her! Ask her to dinner or a movie or for a walk in the park. It doesn't matter, unless she has something already planned for the time you ask, she's going to say yes. Other dudes, ask a girl out! You don't have to be creative or original. If a girl is expecting some creative way of being asked out, then she must be a 16 y/o if not physically, then mentally--so stay away from her. Women like men who are confident (or at least can fake it) and just want to spend time with her. It doesn't matter to us what you plan or not plan. Getting to know someone takes a little time anyway, so just do something! If money is a problem, there are tons of free things to do--check out local museums for any free nights, any free concerts in the park, a nice park that has walking paths or benches, dollar night at the movies...check out your local area. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 You're undermining my excuses, stop it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FairChild Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 So, are you making a plan? Are you goal setting this whole thing out? Make a date on the calendar that you will call her no later than and plan just to talk for say 5 minutes. That's all. If you want to talk more, talk more. Just take a starting step. Baby steps will still get you there, just takes a little longer, that's all. Good luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skippy740 Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 Ask her out to go "window shopping" and for some hot chocolate. (One of my favorite date activities.) BTW, my wife asked ME out and here we are (3 kids later). :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xoomer Posted August 13, 2009 Author Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 Aghh.. I called and she picked up and I couldn't get the words out... I said you want to go out sometime, and she was like friends hanging out for now... And I''m like yeah... I just felt that I needed to say something... and she's like you felt like you needed to throw that carrot out there... I said yeah I guess so... she said she didn't have her calender in front of her so I said call me back when you have time.... AGHH I don't know if it was a win or a Fail.... Possibly an Epic Win Cause I asked if I was going in the right direction before I went to bed and I had a dream about her last night. and I cant get her out of my mind... and I'm 26 butterflies just don't happen anymore Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beefche Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 Ok, it sounds like she might want to just be friends...but it's hard to tell. Try this next time: Call her and say: "hey Sally! It's xoomer. What's going on? I'm thinking about going to a movie this Friday, do you want to go? I thought I'd see GI Joe, but if you have another movie you want to see, that's good--I just want to get out and see a movie." And remember...this is just a date. If she says no, then don't get too down about it. Listen to what she is saying...sometimes someone just can't go on the day you pick or doesn't want to do the thing you asked. Even if she doesn't want to spend time alone with you, it's ok...you're still you and a good person. It's so easy to let your emotions go crazy when we feel rejected. Just come talk to us and we'll make you feel better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StallionMcBeastly Posted August 13, 2009 Report Share Posted August 13, 2009 She obviously wants you. Give her a call and just set up a date to go do something. Easy! Be yourself and don't put too much importance on it. Find other girls too! Good luck Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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