Confusing thing about 2 missionaries..will you please help?

[Guest mormonmusic]

I disagree, Deseret. Every missionary should go out with the intention of losing the girl who said they'd wait.

Why? Because it's so prevalent to believe less is silly. At 19, waiting for someone 2 years is ridiculous.

Also, I had a girlfriend who waited the full two years for me, and when I got home and finally prayed about it, it was clearly the WRONG THING for me to marry her. She was crushed, and all the women in the Ward thought I was the devil. We were both hurt by the experience.

[Vanhin]

I think it is important to point out, that God does answer, reveal, or approve or disapprove our choices in this matter, like in all things, through our prayers by the power of the Holy Ghost. Ask almost any latter-day saint who is married, and they will tell you. I am fairly confident in saying you will most likely NOT have any kind of "visitation" except for the power of the Holy Ghost in conjunction with this question. So, don't be disappointed if the three Nephites don't come knocking on your door in answer to your prayer about who to marry.

My patriarchal blessing confirmed that God knew concerning the woman I should marry, and he answered both hers and my prayer by that Still Small Voice, when we asked Him.

That said, I still think you should go out with this returning missionary (that is if he wants to), and even others, continually praying for guidance on this important decision of your life. Let the infatuation subside before you are sure the answers are from God.

I look back on my journal entries from when I was 17-19, and I thought every girl I met was "the one". It was pathetic.

Regards,

Vanhin

[Guest]

I think it is important to point out, that God does answer, reveal, or approve or disapprove our choices in this matter, like in all things, through our prayers by the power of the Holy Ghost. Ask almost any latter-day saint who is married, and they will tell you. I am fairly confident in saying you will most likely NOT have any kind of "visitation" except for the power of the Holy Ghost in conjunction with this question. So, don't be disappointed if the three Nephites don't come knocking on your door in answer to your prayer about who to marry.

My patriarchal blessing confirmed that God knew concerning the woman I should marry, and he answered both hers and my prayer by that Still Small Voice, when we asked Him.

That said, I still think you should go out with this returning missionary (that is if he wants to), and even others, continually praying for guidance on this important decision of your life. Let the infatuation subside before you are sure the answers are from God.

I look back on my journal entries from when I was 17-19, and I thought every girl I met was "the one". It was pathetic.

Regards,

Vanhin

But Vahnin, they COULD all be "the one". Remember, love is a decision. Not just a feeling. For a marriage to work, that decision must be committed to by both parties. Would you have had a great life if you married one of those girls instead of your wife? Sure, why not? See, I believe God doesn't smite you down with a divorce just because you chose a girl that might not have been "intended"... what does that mean anyway? Intended? That makes it too much like we don't have free agency...

[Vanhin]

But Vahnin, they COULD all be "the one". Remember, love is a decision. Not just a feeling. For a marriage to work, that decision must be committed to by both parties. Would you have had a great life if you married one of those girls instead of your wife? Sure, why not? See, I believe God doesn't smite you down with a divorce just because you chose a girl that might not have been "intended"... what does that mean anyway? Intended? That makes it too much like we don't have free agency...

That's kind of what I am saying... I don't think there is necessarily "the one", but I do think God helps us choose, if we seek the help. I also believe that she should date many guys and pick the right one for her, and have them both gain confirmation through prayer.

Vanhin

Edited December 17, 2009 by Vanhin

[Taldarin]

But Vahnin, they COULD all be "the one". Remember, love is a decision. Not just a feeling. For a marriage to work, that decision must be committed to by both parties. Would you have had a great life if you married one of those girls instead of your wife? Sure, why not? See, I believe God doesn't smite you down with a divorce just because you chose a girl that might not have been "intended"... what does that mean anyway? Intended? That makes it too much like we don't have free agency...

That's the thing -- as the general authorities have said, God gives us a "Best" option, "Better" option, "Good" option, etc, and we have Satan's plans as well. There isn't ONE option, but you want to go with Plan A. That doesn't mean you're going to divorce if you marry the B option.

Which brings the question to mind... If there isn't ONE option, why does everyone keep telling me that our families chose eachother in the pre-earth life?(Like I chose my parents, and my parents chose me)

But I suppose that's a question for another topic.

Edited December 17, 2009 by Taldarin

[Just_A_Guy]

If you're in a class, the spirit will probably give you promptings about the lesson and how you can use it. But if you're being taught tithing and then suddenly you feel like you should marry some guy you haven't seen in two years... Not really.

Does that mean that if I'm in a Temple endowment session and I get a revelation regarding an educational or career choice, it must be a false revelation because it has no direct bearing on what actually happens in the Endowment?

[Guest]

That's the thing -- as the general authorities have said, God gives us a "Best" option, "Better" option, "Good" option, etc, and we have Satan's plans as well. There isn't ONE option, but you want to go with Plan A. That doesn't mean you're going to divorce if you marry the B option.

Which brings the question to mind... If there isn't ONE option, why does everyone keep telling me that our families chose eachother in the pre-earth life?(Like I chose my parents, and my parents chose me)

But I suppose that's a question for another topic.

My opinion on this (non-doctrinal) is that we don't really have the same family structure as we had in pre-mortal life. For example, I only have 2 kids now due to medical problems. I don't think I only have 2 children in pre-mortal life. Like here, my husband only has one wife. That may not be the same as pre-mortal existence. The reason I think this is because, if we had a family structure in pre-mortal existence that we are trying to mimic in this life, then that takes out free agency too - of whether to get married, have kids, etc. etc. So, I think our families are vast in pre-mortal life and we are just mix-matching all the members of our family here on earth.

[Taldarin]

Does that mean that if I'm in a Temple endowment session and I get a revelation regarding an educational or career choice, it must be a false revelation because it has no direct bearing on what actually happens in the Endowment?

I believe that depends on several different things.

For the person who has already been through the endowment session 100 times and pretty much has it down by memory, they can be thinking in other things, and obviously will probably recieve revelation just by simply being in the House of the Lord. Most people are just going through the steps to save our kindred dead and already have it memorized, and so their minds would obviously be on different things. I think the Lord understands that.

But for someone who's going the first time, they should probably be paying complete attention. There's a lot to learn the first few times.

As for me, I've always received my revelation in the celestial room, after the session, while pondering the questions or concerns I've had recently. During the actual ceremony, I've only ever received revelation in the sense that I was learning more about what the endowment session has to teach us(or how I could apply what I'm learning there to my personal/professional life).

Edited December 18, 2009 by Taldarin

[AlixPaige]

Alix, it is only in rare occasions GOD or those beyond the veil may intervene with selecting a spouse for you. This is not a common thing among the Saints and it is usually comes with a visitation of such in the cases for Adam, Jacob, Isaac, even Abraham [others I may have left out], where it is directed you to marry a certain individual. Even the small whispering voice of such is always backed up with a confirmation by the Holy Ghost when the time of such meeting does happens. Why this pre-selection of companionship by those across the veil being involved is not always an easy question to answer. Rarest of them all, is Heavenly Mother’s intervention with pre-selection of such companionship. You will see in the church from one end of the spectrum of choosing yourself to the rare extreme of pre-selection of companionship.

As Funky mentioned, after you determine what you suspect is the right eternal companion and want a divine blessing of it, it is not wrong to ask but never expect it to be on the order what I have aforementioned and the other still has the agency to choose for themselves.

I pray that you will be happy and have a fulfilling eternal companionship.

that line you said about a confirmation by the Holy Ghost..amazing and true. That is truly how I know when I've done what is asked of me. I receive a warm feeling and a good job alix and I feel it and then immediately think of the Holy Ghost. Thats how I know. Which is exactly as you described.

I would guess that the best thing upon meeting would be to develop a strong friendship.Such as being best friends. I think it would be grand to marry your best friend! Its a good foundation.

my next question(for anyone to answer):

i was on another site trying to receive help to. Another LDS site. I wasnt getting very much help(like on here) but there was a reply that kind of stuck out to me.

This girl had suggested I write him a letter just as an ordinary person thanking him for serving a mission for this church and all..like how they have you do it sometimes at church activities.

But heres the thing: My name would be on the paper. And I used to like his younger brother a lot! I mean..A LOT! so he probably remembers my name, and would tell his bro that he got a letter from me. and then his bro would tell him not to write me back and that i am just a freak(it wasnt reciprocated) and that i make things awkward.

what should i do?

because i dont want this guy thinking im a freak before we even meet...

[Taldarin]

my next question(for anyone to answer):

i was on another site trying to receive help to. Another LDS site. I wasnt getting very much help(like on here) but there was a reply that kind of stuck out to me.

This girl had suggested I write him a letter just as an ordinary person thanking him for serving a mission for this church and all..like how they have you do it sometimes at church activities.

But heres the thing: My name would be on the paper. And I used to like his younger brother a lot! I mean..A LOT! so he probably remembers my name, and would tell his bro that he got a letter from me. and then his bro would tell him not to write me back and that i am just a freak(it wasnt reciprocated) and that i make things awkward.

what should i do?

because i dont want this guy thinking im a freak before we even meet...

That happened to a companion of mine on the mission, and yeah, that definitely freaks the missionary out a little bit haha.

And that's weird about the whole super crush on little brother thing. A lot of people don't take that very well.

[AlixPaige]

so what should i do?

maybe its just best to wait til he arrives home back to the town

[Taldarin]

so what should i do?

maybe its just best to wait til he arrives home back to the town

That would probably be best. Making yourself known to him right now would just be weird. Although you could try it...

How soon does he get back?

[AlixPaige]

well i remember he left in may 2 years ago..because i still liked his bro back then and he told me that.

so i am guessing may..

[Guest]

well i remember he left in may 2 years ago..because i still liked his bro back then and he told me that.

so i am guessing may..

Before you do anything else - break off your relationship with the guy headed for the Philippines. Or maybe you did already and I just missed it...

[AlixPaige]

2 months ago there I am sitting in seminary. On my own little scavenger hunt for answers on my long questioning of love. Anything to do with it. I was off in my own little hunt while the rest of the class was paying attention. Ocassionally, when I am sent on these "scavenger hunts" I find something I had been looking for. I couldn't find anything so I decided to listen to what the teacher was saying. Right as I tuned in he said "If we do what is right, the Lord sets us up for success." You know what immediately follwed that?

An amazingly overwhelming feeling came upon me and I could feel the whisperings of the spirit. I was told that if I do what is right Jarom would come into my life." Please, trust me on this one when I say that it felt way more than just to be friends. I could just tell it wasn't just for a friendship. The strongest feeling of the spirit I have ever felt in my life. It made me shake. My heart raced. I kind of felt like crying but couldn't quite get tears out because I was just smiling a ton!

Here's the thing:

I haven't seen Jarom since sophomore year(I'm a senior now). The most I ever said to him was hello. But, back then I had no interest or intrique or feeling about him because I had it big time for his younger brother. Well, I finally figured his brother just wasn't for me since he never talked to me. Jarom is still on his mission as he will be until Mid-June.

Is it possible that Jarom has felt the same thing about me if this is the Holy Spirit?

Is something like that even possible. Because I know I felt something and it was very strong.

I always feel the same when I think about this. Even now as I am trying my hardest to write this in a way it won't be confusing. I just feel so good.

The great feeling I got that day was amazing to say the very least. I knew that of course we would have to be friends first. But I just feel really great about this. And as I think about it I can see us being best friends and then it leading to so much more.

Please be honest with me but please also consider that I really felt this and that I am not a lovestruck teenager. I am not that. When a feeling like this happens, it's altering in a good way!

[Just_A_Guy]

Do things like this really happen? Sure. The question is, do things like this really happen to you? Is this the way you're used to being spoken to by the Spirit?

I'd note what happened in my journal, and otherwise carry on as usual. If you marry the guy later, you'll be able to show him the entry and it'll be really cool. If he's not the one . . . store it in the "misinterpreted promptings" file and use it as a learning experience.

[AlixPaige]

This is how I get my answers. By thought that comes to heart and mind. Accompanied with that great feeling of happiness

[lydlou]

Wow this sounds nearly identical to somthing another girl posted last month. I wonder hove that ones going?

anyway I like the fact that its been presented to you as an If/then kinda thing. "do what is right, let the consequence follow"dont focus overly much on the guy issue, just do waht is right. because focusing toohard on what you wan can distract you from doing good things. faith virtue integrty, ect.

[beefche]

Alix, I know you are young, but how many times do you need to ask the same question?

http://www.lds.net/forums/advice-board/28594-confusing-thing-about-2-missionaries-will-you-please-help.html

Or are these different guys for whom you've received inspiration?

Edited January 14, 2010 by beefche

[lydlou]

oops! lol, no wonder it sounded familar. Anyway, my advice to focus on the "do what is right" part of your revalation still stands. I think thats the most important part.

and whil your "doing the right thing" dont forget to mention to your boyfriend that you dont plan on waiting for him while hes away.

Edited January 14, 2010 by lydlou

[pam]

I've merged the two threads. Alix..just a suggestion. Please don't keep asking asking the same question by opening new threads.

But I would like to know the answer to Beefche's question as well.

[Connie]

If Jarom is on his mission, i doubt he will be getting revelation on whom to marry. I suppose it's possible but i would imagine the Lord being more practical than that. He has other things to reveal to him at this point. A revelation on marriage will probably not happen for him until he returns.

I like JAG's suggestion. Make a note of how you feel and go about life as normal. I would follow that up with the advise Emma is given in the movie based on Jane Austen's book. "Let his behavior be your guide." It sounds like you may have chased his brother a bit because you liked him so much, hence he thinks you're a "freak." Just be friendly with him and not aggressive, if you know what i mean. Develop a friendship first. Then if it moves to a different level that's great and if not someone else will come along and you will always have a good friend in Jarom.

[AlixPaige]

I have posted on here many time pertaining to a guy who is now almost home from his mission.

And then I also talked about that whispering from the holy spirit. And how if I do what is right so and so will come into my life.

In seminary we learned that God loves If/Then statements. Well, with this I see it true.

There are tons of scriptures marked in my scriptures about this.

My favorite that I marked is

D&C 9:8-9 then after reading that..read D&C 8:9-10. There are amazing and when I came upon that I knew that I shouldnt keep asking forum people.

So now, here I am like 3 months later after this amazing feeling, saying how amazing this still all is.

I mean really why would I doubt something the holy ghost whispered to me?

I was, but now I am not.

When you know something is true, dont let others(even other members) tell you if this is possible or not.

When you know and you get yet another amazing feeling about it then for me, yeah I know its true.

Patience is a virtue and when I see him and that amazing feeling and a "there he is" from my pal the holy ghost then I know that I all that I am saying is true.

Now: meet me...shy around new people...but hilarious and sweet around her friends.

now add in that amazing feeling when I see him and that whispering....GREAT! with a dash of nervousness. A big dash(like accidentally putting salt in instead of sugar while making cookies).

What the heck do i do then?

throw up?

I have no idea where I will see him....at walmart....in carls jr...in a store

all i know is that i will see him.

all i can hope and ask for is that there is something that makes us talk to each other.

I hear when you do something with confidence in the lord it turns out great.

[pam]

Two moderators have asked why this needs to keep being brought up. I've also asked that you discontinue starting new threads on the same subject.

Thread is closed.