lasa Posted February 26, 2013 Report Share Posted February 26, 2013 I was thinking about going to BYU, I heard that if you aren't Mormon and haven't served on a mission then you have no chance with most of the women there is that true? I would be willing to convert but already being 21 and haven't started school yet serving on a mission would delay my career to long. My reasons for wanting to go to BYU besides it being a great university are because I have all of the same values and I want to get married. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted February 26, 2013 Report Share Posted February 26, 2013 I'm not sure if you are thinking of doing so, but converting just so you can be considered eligible is a horrible idea. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bini Posted February 26, 2013 Report Share Posted February 26, 2013 Don't attend BYU with sole emphasis on dating and finding a wife. You being 21, I would recommend that you focus on studies and socialise with lots and lots of different people, and you're bound to make some great connections. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lasa Posted February 26, 2013 Author Report Share Posted February 26, 2013 I'm not sure if you are thinking of doing so, but converting just so you can be considered eligible is a horrible idea.Well that definitely wouldn't be the sole reason for converting, if that's the only reason someone converted to a religion I imagine they would eventually be miserable. But I can't lie it would be a factor. My main question was the part about serving on a mission. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
estradling75 Posted February 26, 2013 Report Share Posted February 26, 2013 If you want to be married you need to do yourself and your future spouse a favor... You need to be totally honest about where you are in all aspects of your life. This would include spiritually/religion. Will this limit your dating prospects? It absolutely will. And that is a good thing. You and your future spouse need to have certain agreement on exceptions. Marriage is going to be hard. Finding out that the person you married wasn't what you thought they were can be devastating. Accept the limits that being yourself puts on your dating pool. If you truly want to change for you, then that is great. But don't put on a false front. Because what heart ache you might save yourself now by using false front, you will pay latter in pain for you and your spouse as you struggle and fail to keep it up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wingnut Posted February 26, 2013 Report Share Posted February 26, 2013 Don't attend BYU.Fixed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anddenex Posted February 26, 2013 Report Share Posted February 26, 2013 I was thinking about going to BYU, I heard that if you aren't Mormon and haven't served on a mission then you have no chance with most of the women there is that true? I would be willing to convert but already being 21 and haven't started school yet serving on a mission would delay my career to long. My reasons for wanting to go to BYU besides it being a great university are because I have all of the same values and I want to get married.Yes, as others have shared, if you are not Mormon your the pool of girls you choose to date will be limited, especially if you are hoping for a marriage partner.As other have shared, you need to be upfront and honest pertaining to your spiritual goals. I have a friend who dated a nonmember, she told him upfront that they would not marry unless they were married in the temple. He took the missionary discussions, was baptized a short time later, and a year later they were sealed.After six months he stopped going to Church; he then started drinking and she surely despised beer in her home (didn't want this atmosphere around her children). When she realized he wasn't going to change -- she filed for divorce. It was truly upsetting to her, and very dishonest on his part. If you should listen to the discussions, become a member of the Church because you gained a testimony -- in other words, received a witness -- then I would recommend going on a mission. You may be older, but your career will not be on hold only for two years, which isn't a lot of time. So instead of graduating, let's say in 2016, you graduate in 2018. Instead of being 23, you are now 25. This isn't a lot of time, however what a person learns on their mission, if they serve faithfully will greatly enhance their life.Best wishes, and please be honest with yourself if you should join the Church and with any woman you date. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Backroads Posted February 26, 2013 Report Share Posted February 26, 2013 Apply to BYU. Should you get accepted and it's what you want, go for it. BYU is a great school. Get a great education and go for the social life, including dating. But keep the latter in perspective. If a date leads to marriage, wonderful. But be yourself and don't use religion as an "in" to dating. You're either Mormon or you're not, a girl will either accept a different religion for marriage or she won't. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prisonchaplain Posted February 26, 2013 Report Share Posted February 26, 2013 (edited) I noticed you list yourself as a Christian. Just a thought--why not just go to a good conservative Christian school? That way, when you date, religion won't be an issue? If you are thinking of converting anyway, convert first, then go.Not that I'm biased or anything . . . Whitworth University Edited February 26, 2013 by prisonchaplain Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ZionsRodeVos Posted February 26, 2013 Report Share Posted February 26, 2013 I started my mission when I was 24 and finished when I was 26. I felt that I was behind because I went so late and then of course married later than what I was taught was the norm. I still have no college/university degree and yet I am a database programmer making a good salary. And I worked in data conversion/data entry for about 3 or so years after my mission before really getting into the technology sector. So the career I have now started when I was 29 or 30. I give this example to show you that you would not be as far behind (if you want to call it that) as I was and everything worked out fine for me. I do believe that Heavenly Father blessed me with the job I have now. So, if you are going to convert because you believe then do so and go on your mission and then you won't have to worry about not being considered for dates because you didn't serve a mission. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mnn727 Posted February 26, 2013 Report Share Posted February 26, 2013 There are many good Christian colleges, why specifically do you think going to BYU would be for you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Backroads Posted February 26, 2013 Report Share Posted February 26, 2013 My guess is some academic merit of BYU rather than spiritual? That's what I assumed here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prisonchaplain Posted February 27, 2013 Report Share Posted February 27, 2013 Naw, Backroads...if that was it, then he'd have already applied to Whitworth (again, in my unbiased opinion)... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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