In response to that Utah Fed judge ruling...

[Suzie]

I don't claim to know all the answers, but . . .

If my hypothetical cousin--I'll call him, say, Ritt Momney--announces to me that he's figured out how to make his company's stock triple, and all he has to do is lay off half his workforce, and wouldn't I like to spend a week with him in the Cayman Islands to celebrate--

Do I have a similar obligation to remain silent? Or can I approach him and say "dude, I love you, but you know that's not right"?

If the latter--why is that different than the situation Carlimac faces?

JAG, I suppose it has a lot to do with how close the relationship is and if they extended an invitation to me ( I am just giving an example, I personally wouldn't have a problem in wishing them the best and inviting them over to my home, etc). If there is not such a relationship to start with and the person isn't my friend or relative or the person isn't inviting me to the wedding, why should I approach them and tell them what they are doing is wrong? I find it odd.

[carlimac]

Here, let me try this AGAIN.

I suggest you go back and read the first paragraph of my first post. And then read the second. I've already come to the conclusions that telling my gay friend he's a sinner at this point is really a bad idea.

Do you have any other suggestions of what to say or how to approach the situation or are you just going to flame me?

[beefche]

I'm not flaming you. I am answering your questions as found here:

I feel like I should say something to him but I don't know what. I guess I'm glad he has someone to inherit his stuff when he dies, someone to visit him in the hospital but that's as far as it goes. I'm not going to say that. That's just not socially acceptable- really.

So someone help me out here. What should our reactions as stalwart believers of the gospel of Jesus Christ be to this kind of news? WWJD or say? Is it our responsibility to do what He would do or do we just follow Thumper's mother's advice. "If you can't say something nice don't say nothing at all." What does it really mean to take on the name of Christ in these situations?

If you don't want us answering your questions, then don't ask. Or if you think I'm confused on what your question is, then rephrase it. Again, I'm answering your own questions you posted in your own original post.

[carlimac]

You posted that in your original post. I AM responding to the main question.

You certainly have a right to your opinion. You can be active in your community/state to help enact laws supporting your views of marriage. But, to confront someone individually? No, I do not think you should. What gives you the right to approach someone to tell them they are wrong?

I specifically said in that first post that I would never do this. So your question doesn't make sense.

If you were referring to my nephew, it's because he's part of my family. But I still wouldn't do it and stated as much. I said I FEEL like it but wouldn't.

[Lakumi]

Sorry I mentioned my nephew. It was a distraction to the point I was trying to make. Just forget him, OK?

The point that was so obviously missed was this: Now that this gay marriage thing is happening in Utah (and I assume a fair amount of posters on this board are from Utah) how do we respond as the Savior would , or as He would want us to on the occasion that our personal gay or lesbian friends or family members are getting married? What do we say? Are we condoning the relationship ( not just the emotional one but the physical one that is expected when people get married) by congratulating them?

No, I think you are happy to see them happy.

One does not have to support the origin of the joy to appreciate the joy the person now feels.

[EarlJibbs]

I just taught the youth on Sunday about helping other quorum members back to church. In preparation I read one of President Uchdorfs talks about how one of the greatest gifts of God is our agency. I have been able to apply that to this happening in Utah.

We respect ones choice to make a decision to get married (gay or not) and we respect ones choice if they support it. What if your brother got baptized in another church and they asked you to attend something they felt was a happy occasion? Would you not tell them congratulations? My friends know where I stand. My family knows where I stand. So if my brother tells me he is going to get married to another man, I stand by to help where I can. Would I have sorrow? Sure. I'm sure that our Heavenly Father has sorrow watching us make mistakes over and over.

Where the water is luke warm I will teach, and I will share. Where the water is cold I will wait for a better time and simply be there. Calling anyone out about their agency choices when they are in no position to accept change frustrates and angers. I think this can be more damaging. I don't choose to ignore, but I choose my confrontations at times they can make a difference and when my true intentions can be shown. Not out of outrage or fear the world is going to end. Respect those that choose different paths, its not accepting their way, its something better.

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[Traveler]

I first heard about it on Facebook as a highschool friend ( former LDS, seminary going buddy) announced he and his boyfriend are now married. My initial reaction was a nauseous feeling. I didn't throw up or anything. I'm not that dramatic. But then came the sorrow and frustration. Not only towards him personally but about this whole messed up legal system. My gut reaction was to call him out on it, to chastise him and get in his face as he does to others who disagree with him. Obviously I'm not going to do that. I've tangled with him enough on facebook about political issues that I know it never gets us to a point of friendliness. It's not worth the effort of trying to defend my stance or beliefs. PLus he had at least 30 ecstatic responses to his news. (No one I knew by the way.)

I feel like I should say something to him but I don't know what. I guess I'm glad he has someone to inherit his stuff when he dies, someone to visit him in the hospital but that's as far as it goes. I'm not going to say that. That's just not socially acceptable- really.

So someone help me out here. What should our reactions as stalwart believers of the gospel of Jesus Christ be to this kind of news? WWJD or say? Is it our responsibility to do what He would do or do we just follow Thumper's mother's advice. "If you can't say something nice don't say nothing at all." What does it really mean to take on the name of Christ in these situations?

I believe that whenever someone brings up a subject (in your face) that you have a right (even a responsibility) to respond truthfully and honestly However, there are times and conditions that truth is socially unacceptable in certain circles. Sadly the “not responding” is often assumed that you agree and support. Without doubt I tend to error on the side of making my views known. As long as I can remember I have thought and experienced that asking questions as an engine of knowledge and truth. If you are among individuals that will not accept your opinion and honestly consider any truth and merit in it - not only are you not among friends - but you are not among good people.

Good people will accept criticism that will bring benefits - especially eternal benefits. Perhaps I am too judgmental but in my mind there are indeed bad people. They are bad people because they are more determined in their pleasure than they are making sacrifices for a greater good. But then to a society that does not respect marriage there is not much sense in trying to hold one particular element of that disrespect to greater account than any other element of disrespect.

The Traveler