The Priesthood Let Us Down

[Guest Yediyd]

Well I've been here almost a month now, and this is my fisrt attempt at starting a topic. I'm saddend and I hurt for my son. he is 13 years old, he wants nothing to do with God or this church (we are LDS). I am a single mother of two. Daughter is 14, son 13...my son has asperger's syndrome (a spectrum disorder, in the autism family). I will have been a memeber of the LDS church for 3 years on the 26th of this month, and for all that time...I've been taught that we take care of the fatherless in this church. Empty words!!!!!! I have been asking my priesthood leaders since I started comming to this church to help me , I went to my Bishop and asked him to bring it up to the men...my son needs a father figure, he needs male influence. In the last 3 years, our ward has had 3 father/son campouts...ALL THREE times, I asked men to take my son! I asked the men who had no sons, or who's sons were too small to go. Nobody stepped up, the first two times, I was disappointed...but I understood. My son is difficult, his disorder is hard to deal with, but this last time...he REALLY wanted to go!!! He is so hurt by his father who completly abandoned him. Yesterday, during our fast testimony meeting, a man stood up and testified how special the weekend was for him and his son. My son lost it! He had a meltdown right in front of everyone! he came home and ran to his room in tears! He told me that he hates his father, And this stupid church (his words) When I tried to comfort him...he burst out with...WHY DOESN'T ANYBODY WANT ME? I assured him that I did, but that is not enough for him. My heart is brocken for him, and furious with my priesthood leaders! Why can't they practise what they preach? Me and my kids have fallen threw the cracks. And yes, I DID take this to the Bishop...he appoligised to me and said he would have a meeting. that was on Friday afternoon, when I realized that my son was going to miss out , again....I 'm not sure if this "meeting" happened...but my son had to hear about the great time OTHER boys had when I forced him to go to church on sunday. Now he never wants to go back. Can't say that I blame him!!

Yediyd

[Gwen]

i'm so sorry to hear that yedi. there is no excuse for what happened to your son. there is nothing i can say that will make it hurt less. i'm sorry this has happened. ppl don't always practice what they preach. all i can say is the doctrines and ordinances are compleatly seperate from the ppl. keep strong and keep saying something, let them know however many times you need to that they dropped the ball. can't be an agent of change if you aren't there, if you won't speak up. again i am so sorry to hear that this has happened.

[Guest Yediyd]

i'm so sorry to hear that yedi. there is no excuse for what happened to your son. there is nothing i can say that will make it hurt less. i'm sorry this has happened. ppl don't always practice what they preach. all i can say is the doctrines and ordinances are compleatly seperate from the ppl. keep strong and keep saying something, let them know however many times you need to that they dropped the ball. can't be an agent of change if you aren't there, if you won't speak up. again i am so sorry to hear that this has happened.

Thank you,

I HAVE been speaking up! I've been LOUD, too! I spouted off to my Relief Sociaty President, her son in law is our Stake President...I went to him in counselling. They ALL KNOW my situation. I've been confused about the priesthood since I joined this church....now I'm just dissolusioned and angry!

Yediyd

[karin]

Well I've been here almost a month now, and this is my fisrt attempt at starting a topic. I'm saddend and I hurt for my son. he is 13 years old, he wants nothing to do with God or this church (we are LDS). I am a single mother of two. Daughter is 14, son 13...my son has asperger's syndrome (a spectrum disorder, in the autism family). I will have been a memeber of the LDS church for 3 years on the 26th of this month, and for all that time...I've been taught that we take care of the fatherless in this church. Empty words!!!!!! I have been asking my priesthood leaders since I started comming to this church to help me , I went to my Bishop and asked him to bring it up to the men...my son needs a father figure, he needs male influence. In the last 3 years, our ward has had 3 father/son campouts...ALL THREE times, I asked men to take my son! I asked the men who had no sons, or who's sons were too small to go. Nobody stepped up, the first two times, I was disappointed...but I understood. My son is difficult, his disorder is hard to deal with, but this last time...he REALLY wanted to go!!! He is so hurt by his father who completly abandoned him. Yesterday, during our fast testimony meeting, a man stood up and testified how special the weekend was for him and his son. My son lost it! He had a meltdown right in front of everyone! he came home and ran to his room in tears! He told me that he hates his father, And this stupid church (his words) When I tried to comfort him...he burst out with...WHY DOESN'T ANYBODY WANT ME? I assured him that I did, but that is not enough for him. My heart is brocken for him, and furious with my priesthood leaders! Why can't they practise what they preach? Me and my kids have fallen threw the cracks. And yes, I DID take this to the Bishop...he appoligised to me and said he would have a meeting. that was on Friday afternoon, when I realized that my son was going to miss out , again....I 'm not sure if this "meeting" happened...but my son had to hear about the great time OTHER boys had when I forced him to go to church on sunday. Now he never wants to go back. Can't say that I blame him!!

Yediyd

[sixpacktr]

Yediyd,

There a lots of things that go thru people's minds when they see this type of thing happen. I'm going to take your words as the actual way that things happened, and say to you that you should sit down with his YM President and the counselor and advisor and figure out what needs to be done. The Bishop is over the AP, true, but the YM Presidency is there for the day to day things, and to handle the burden. I'm surprised that they didn't help out. I really am.

Your's isn't the first or last instance of imperfect men that hold the PH from fulfilling their duty. We are specifically told to visit the widows and fatherless, and we don't always do the best at that. My 8 month+ pregnant daughter and her husband 6 weeks off of knee surgery moved this last Friday, and NO ONE from the EQ showed up. They called a 16 year old Priest, who then arranged for some people to come over, and he even brought dinner for them! That 16 year old gets it. That EQ Pres and the others don't. It is that simple.

You've been patient enough (3 years). I'd meet with them and meet soon (this week). I'd put them on the spot (calmly, logically, not too much emotion) as to what they are going to do for your son as holders of the MP and as his PH leaders. See what they say. Tell them you want monthly updates on progress, etc. It still isn't too late. I'm sure that if someone would spend some time with him he would respond.

I hope everything goes well.

[Guest Yediyd]

Yediyd,

There a lots of things that go thru people's minds when they see this type of thing happen. I'm going to take your words as the actual way that things happened, and say to you that you should sit down with his YM President and the counselor and advisor and figure out what needs to be done. The Bishop is over the AP, true, but the YM Presidency is there for the day to day things, and to handle the burden. I'm surprised that they didn't help out. I really am.

Your's isn't the first or last instance of imperfect men that hold the PH from fulfilling their duty. We are specifically told to visit the widows and fatherless, and we don't always do the best at that. My 8 month+ pregnant daughter and her husband 6 weeks off of knee surgery moved this last Friday, and NO ONE from the EQ showed up. They called a 16 year old Priest, who then arranged for some people to come over, and he even brought dinner for them! That 16 year old gets it. That EQ Pres and the others don't. It is that simple.

You've been patient enough (3 years). I'd meet with them and meet soon (this week). I'd put them on the spot (calmly, logically, not too much emotion) as to what they are going to do for your son as holders of the MP and as his PH leaders. See what they say. Tell them you want monthly updates on progress, etc. It still isn't too late. I'm sure that if someone would spend some time with him he would respond.

I hope everything goes well.

thanks 6pack

Don't get me wrong...the people in my ward are AWSOME...I really love them....but they lead busy lives....my Bishop is a collage professor, so is the stake president, we are the stake center....I'm just a single mom....nobody important. That of course is just the way I feel...people are nice...and when I had my heart attack...the rs was there. when I was in the hospital with pnumonia...the rs was there....but the priesthood eludes us.

[miztrniceguy]

in the words of my wife "if the men wont do it i would do it myself". next time they have a campout, YOU show up with your son. if someone...no, when someone says "hey!" then you have them on the spot there and then for not stepping up.

[Guest Yediyd]

in the words of my wife "if the men wont do it i would do it myself". next time they have a campout, YOU show up with your son. if someone...no, when someone says "hey!" then you have them on the spot there and then for not stepping up.

Great idea! except, I don't have a car! I'm dissabled...trying to find work, I'm low income and struggling...I'm just not as important as people who have "real" jobs, and useful lives. I'm different than most of the great families in my ward...I wasn't raised LDS, I don't fit in to their lifestiles....that's why I come up here...I need fellowship, too. I just feel so alone right now...sorry to whine.

[JcDean78]

....I'm just a single mom....nobody important.

Never ever say or think that. I was raised by a single mom who gave up everything for me. Single parents who fight to make it are my heroes and an inspiration.

[Guest Yediyd]

<div class='quotemain'>

....I'm just a single mom....nobody important.

Never ever say or think that. I was raised by a single mom who gave up everything for me. Single parents who fight to make it are my heroes and an inspiration.

Thank you,

It's just hard not to feel this way...I'm sure my perspective will change...in time

[shanstress70]

<div class='quotemain'>

....I'm just a single mom....nobody important.

Never ever say or think that. I was raised by a single mom who gave up everything for me. Single parents who fight to make it are my heroes and an inspiration.

I second that, Yediyd. You have such a hard job, and it is a thankless job. But hopefully when your kids are older, they will appreciate all you have done for them.

I had the exact same thought as Mizterniceguy. I would do that next time... just ask someone if you guys can ride along and have a great weekend of camping!

I am so sad for your son.

[Guest Yediyd]

<div class='quotemain'>

<div class='quotemain'>

....I'm just a single mom....nobody important.

Never ever say or think that. I was raised by a single mom who gave up everything for me. Single parents who fight to make it are my heroes and an inspiration.

I second that, Yediyd. You have such a hard job, and it is a thankless job. But hopefully when your kids are older, they will appreciate all you have done for them.

I had the exact same thought as Mizterniceguy. I would do that next time... just ask someone if you guys can ride along and have a great weekend of camping!

I am so sad for your son.

Thank you,

I apprecieate the validation. my kids will be home from school soon, gotta run...will check back later!

Yedi

[miztrniceguy]

<div class='quotemain'>

in the words of my wife "if the men wont do it i would do it myself". next time they have a campout, YOU show up with your son. if someone...no, when someone says "hey!" then you have them on the spot there and then for not stepping up.

Great idea! except, I don't have a car! I'm dissabled...trying to find work, I'm low income and struggling...I'm just not as important as people who have "real" jobs, and useful lives. I'm different than most of the great families in my ward...I wasn't raised LDS, I don't fit in to their lifestiles....that's why I come up here...I need fellowship, too. I just feel so alone right now...sorry to whine.

you ARE important, and you DO matter!!!!

[StrawberryFields]

I feel your pain, nothing hurts us as much as when are children hurt and we can't make it all better right then and there.

I have also heard your feeling about being ignored by the priesthood before from single mothers. "You" single moms are the 'great threat" to happily married PH's

I also understand how your son has it difficult having a disability and not a father who lives with him in a church that is all about families...

I pray that your son can have his feelings mended and that the men in your ward will step up to the plate and include your son along with their own boy. All you need is one father AND son to reach out to him in sincere friendship.

[Guest Yediyd]

I feel your pain, nothing hurts us as much as when are children hurt and we can't make it all better right then and there.

I have also heard your feeling about being ignored by the priesthood before from single mothers. "You" single moms are the 'great threat" to happily married PH's

I also understand how your son has it difficult having a disability and not a father who lives with him in a church that is all about families...

I pray that your son can have his feelings mended and that the men in your ward will step up to the plate and include your son along with their own boy. All you need is one father AND son to reach out to him in sincere friendship.

Thank you, Straw...That's what I have been saying for three years.

[Guest Username-Removed]

Just my 2 cents ....

From a guy who has needed the church, and the church walked away. Its taken me a long time to forgive them, but I realized that I needed to. I have also come to know that I also have to forgive my father, which I am currently working on.

When I came back to church, I said to myself that I would go it alone, that I didnt need anybody besides me and my heavanly father to gain salvation. I didnt always feel that way, but I do now. Also, when I came back to church, my Stake President said to me, that I would not have to go it alone again - I looked at him and said, "thank you, but I'm fine". The only people I can count on in this world is me and heavanly father, and Im not so sure about me! LOL

So strongly do I feel in this, that I study, study study and volunteer, volunteer and volunteer. Nobody is perfect, and I indend to show other members what its really about. Yes I home teach, and even if they see my caller ID on the phone, and dont answer, I am at thier door hiding under the peep hole! LOL They needed an emergency coordinator and I put up a website, spent hours of research time and we are having our first mock distaster this month - boy are they in for a surprise when they dont have thier stuff ready!

Im like white on rice in the middle of snow storm.

My advice, do NOT count on anybody, you do it! I realize things are missing. Everybody comes up short in some way. I mean EVERYBODY! So, you fill in the rest with the positive you can add to the mix and I think you'll be surprised what comes out of that oven. Study Study Study, volunteer, volunteer, volunteer!

[BenRaines]

I would like to share another side to a similar story. I have been married for 32 years. Always active in the church since I was baptised at 16. I have three daughters and one son. From the time my son was out of diapers we have gone to father/son campout. More times than not we have taken another boy or two who do not have fathers in the home, fathers that don't have the time or are not interested.

We do the same for other scout outings. I also home teach three single sisters with my wife. Never felt threatened by the single sisters in the church. Two of the single sisters I home teach are young enough to be my daughters.

Yes there are incidents where we are imperfect, imagine that. There are many more where good men live up to their priesthood and magnify the callings they have or are just great guys.

I was a Scoutmaster before I had a son and since and now that son is 24 I am Scoutmaster again. Is it because I have a calling? No it is because I made it known to my Bishop that it is one job that I would aspire to.

By the way a Scoutmaster is not set apart as such. It is a volunteer calling.

Ben Raines

[Guest Yediyd]

Just my 2 cents ....

From a guy who has needed the church, and the church walked away. Its taken me a long time to forgive them, but I realized that I needed to. I have also come to know that I also have to forgive my father, which I am currently working on.

When I came back to church, I said to myself that I would go it alone, that I didnt need anybody besides me and my heavanly father to gain salvation. I didnt always feel that way, but I do now. Also, when I came back to church, my Stake President said to me, that I would not have to go it alone again - I looked at him and said, "thank you, but I'm fine". The only people I can count on in this world is me and heavanly father, and Im not so sure about me! LOL

So strongly do I feel in this, that I study, study study and volunteer, volunteer and volunteer. Nobody is perfect, and I indend to show other members what its really about. Yes I home teach, and even if they see my caller ID on the phone, and dont answer, I am at thier door hiding under the peep hole! LOL They needed an emergency coordinator and I put up a website, spent hours of research time and we are having our first mock distaster this month - boy are they in for a surprise when they dont have thier stuff ready!

Im like white on rice in the middle of snow storm.

My advice, do NOT count on anybody, you do it! I realize things are missing. Everybody comes up short in some way. I mean EVERYBODY! So, you fill in the rest with the positive you can add to the mix and I think you'll be surprised what comes out of that oven. Study Study Study, volunteer, volunteer, volunteer!

Thank you...good advise, I will not quit the church...my testimony is too strong...I just feel overwhelmed with my son's disorder alot...and wish I had some help. BUT YOU ARE RIGHT, thank you.

I would like to share another side to a similar story. I have been married for 32 years. Always active in the church since I was baptised at 16. I have three daughters and one son. From the time my son was out of diapers we have gone to father/son campout. More times than not we have taken another boy or two who do not have fathers in the home, fathers that don't have the time or are not interested.

We do the same for other scout outings. I also home teach three single sisters with my wife. Never felt threatened by the single sisters in the church. Two of the single sisters I home teach are young enough to be my daughters.

Yes there are incidents where we are imperfect, imagine that. There are many more where good men live up to their priesthood and magnify the callings they have or are just great guys.

I was a Scoutmaster before I had a son and since and now that son is 24 I am Scoutmaster again. Is it because I have a calling? No it is because I made it known to my Bishop that it is one job that I would aspire to.

By the way a Scoutmaster is not set apart as such. It is a volunteer calling.

Ben Raines

that's wonderful, Ben....too bad you are not in my ward.

[Missitta]

((((Yediyd)))))

My heart goes out to you so much. I work with many children with Autism and Aspergers and I have to say it is much harder dealing with Aspergers because so few people understand what it is. I hope your state is MUCH better than mine with having support systems for Aspergers kids. It is beyond frustrating.

As far as the priesthood, I am personally going through an issue with the priesthood of the church as well. I have had a very difficult time coming to terms that even though they are blessed with the priesthood they are also human and make mistakes, including bishops. Maybe they are concerned about having someone take your son who is unfamiliar with Aspergers. Maybe if you give your bishop and other leaders some resources on Aspergers and they realize it's not really as scary as the stigma put on it makes it they will feel more comfortable with it. Or perhaps ask if you can join the father and sons outting if they are concerned about having him there and tell them you will need a ride. If they raise objections just tell them you will not leave your son out of another gathering.

As far as him not wanting to go to church, the poor kid is having a perfectly rational response to havng his feelings hurt. It will take time, possibly a long time for him to be okay again. I would say talk to your bishop again and tell him straight out your son needs to feel welcome to the church. Maybe he will work himself to involve your son in more outtings.

Again my heart goes out to you. I only have an idea of how hard it is to raise a child with Aspergers. It makes it so much worse when you feel you don't have the support you need.

[Guest Yediyd]

((((Yediyd)))))

My heart goes out to you so much. I work with many children with Autism and Aspergers and I have to say it is much harder dealing with Aspergers because so few people understand what it is. I hope your state is MUCH better than mine with having support systems for Aspergers kids. It is beyond frustrating.

As far as the priesthood, I am personally going through an issue with the priesthood of the church as well. I have had a very difficult time coming to terms that even though they are blessed with the priesthood they are also human and make mistakes, including bishops. Maybe they are concerned about having someone take your son who is unfamiliar with Aspergers. Maybe if you give your bishop and other leaders some resources on Aspergers and they realize it's not really as scary as the stigma put on it makes it they will feel more comfortable with it. Or perhaps ask if you can join the father and sons outting if they are concerned about having him there and tell them you will need a ride. If they raise objections just tell them you will not leave your son out of another gathering.

As far as him not wanting to go to church, the poor kid is having a perfectly rational response to havng his feelings hurt. It will take time, possibly a long time for him to be okay again. I would say talk to your bishop again and tell him straight out your son needs to feel welcome to the church. Maybe he will work himself to involve your son in more outtings.

Again my heart goes out to you. I only have an idea of how hard it is to raise a child with Aspergers. It makes it so much worse when you feel you don't have the support you need.

Actually, my Bishop is a good man...and the priesthood leaders have taken the time to meet with my son's doctor to learn about his disorder....but he is a handfull...and he has had meny meltdowns at church....they are just skittish....non of them REALLY want to deal with his obnotious behavior...I don't blame them....but it is exaughsting for me ....I don't have the option of not wanting to deal with it.

My husband walked away because he couldn't handle it...how can I expect a man who is not his father, to take an interest....this has been an ongoing problem ...I've been to my Bishop about it, his son is autistic...but you are right...I believe asperger's is worse. I have the Bishop's son in my sunday school class, I deal with him just fine. I just wish God could see how hurt my son is. I know, I know...he does...well...it is not easy watching him hurt and long for something I cannot give him.

[CrimsonKairos]

To be honest, I'd be hesitant to be responsible for another person's child even temporarily if that child has specific needs or challenges such as those you describe. Why?

I'm not a cold-hearted person. My parents adopted two kids, one was mentally handicapped, the other had fetal alcohol syndrome, as did three foster kids we took care of for awhile. It was pretty dang hard.

The reason I'd be hesitant is that if something happened to the child while they were under my watch, or if I treated the child in a way that seemed necessary (as in a meltdown of theirs), then the child and the mother would be more bitter against me and the Church than in the first place, not to mention potential lawsuits or other legal action.

Does that make sense? Now I know that doesn't make everything better. Understanding why people are wary doesn't mean your son doesn't need a father.

I detect that you really do have a testimony of the Church, but that you are hurting for your son and you're weary yourself with the trial God has asked both of you to bear. I pray you'll have strength to do what life demands of you. I pray you and your son will be comforted. I'm sorry you are both hurting right now.

[Guest Yediyd]

To be honest, I'd be hesitant to be responsible for another person's child even temporarily if that child has specific needs or challenges such as those you describe. Why?

I'm not a cold-hearted person. My parents adopted two kids, one was mentally handicapped, the other had fetal alcohol syndrome, as did three foster kids we took care of for awhile. It was pretty dang hard.

The reason I'd be hesitant is that if something happened to the child while they were under my watch, or if I treated the child in a way that seemed necessary (as in a meltdown of theirs), then the child and the mother would be more bitter against me and the Church than in the first place, not to mention potential lawsuits or other legal action.

Does that make sense? Now I know that doesn't make everything better. Understanding why people are wary doesn't mean your son doesn't need a father.

I detect that you really do have a testimony of the Church, but that you are hurting for your son and you're weary yourself with the trial God has asked both of you to bear. I pray you'll have strength to do what life demands of you. I pray you and your son will be comforted. I'm sorry you are both hurting right now.

You are right, thank you for the encouragement....I'm not as angry, now....but I DO hurt for my son. I believe that is why my son has fallen through the cracks...his disorder. Already, a man had to restrain him at church...my son claimed that he "slamed me against the wall" not true, but the Bishop had to invstigate the claim. So I understand your position and apparently the position of the men in my ward....but that does not ease the pain of my son's being left out.

He won't be going to young man's camp or the Washington Temple trip because of his actions...he hit the Bishop's son, took the lord's name in vein and dropped the"f" bomb in front of the Bishop...I understand why he is being excluded...but this is drawing him further and further away from the church.

Already, he does not want to go to mutual...the Bishop advised me not to force him...but he WANTED to go on the camping trip. It does no good to explain to him about cause and affect, or that his actions are why he gets excluded...he does not get it...he can't make the connection, this is classic aspergers. He only see's the injustes done to him, he has no clue about the feelings of others, he has no empathy, yet insist on EVERYONE seeing things from HIS point of view...which is the only point he can see...It is very exaughsting!!!!!!! God gave us this trial for a reason, but I am soooo wore out and sad.

Thanks for the kind words...I'm sorry I was so harsh and angry....I am a mother, he is my son...I just want to "fix" it for him. and I can't. I feel SOOOOOOOOOO alone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yediyd

[bevq]

Hi

I am not certain I can add any words of deep wisdom here, but I will try.

I am married to a non-member and do everything in the Church for my 5 children. I have felt as you are feeling in a different way perhaps.

There have been father-son activities and such through the years. My husband hates camping and has to be forced go. If it has to do with Church he wants nothing to do with it for the most part. I had to go up to specific people and ask them to take my sons on the campouts. I didn't go to the Bishop. Didn't know I was supposed to. I guess I just chose men who I thought would do it. They did.

Sometimes they went to activities alone.

My advice, humble as it is, is to choose a specific priesthood holder and ask.

There were times when they didn't want to go to Church because of 'things' that hurt. My youngest son, who has had behavioral problems through the years, was totally neglected when he left the Primary. He was supposed to get a certificate, they were supposed to mention it. They didn't. They mentioned his friend who left 3 weeks after him. I went home and cried. He didn't. He was used to it, as this wasn't the first time.

Heck there I times I don't want to go- or at least I don't want to hear one more man bear his testimony about how incredible his wife is and how thankful he is they are a forever family. My heart aches too. I was baptized 27 years ago and was married 28 years ago. I cannot and won't give up...

Sometimes I think this is part of enduring to the end. We have to grin and bear it and face pain, learn to deal with it and move forward. :)

Don't YOU give up mom! And don't let him. This is how we grow.

People are just not perfect. I have found that everywhere we have lived, if something needs to be done, everyone assumes everyone else has taken care of it. You have to speak to someone you want to be the one to mentor your son, or take him on a campout. A home teacher perhaps? Husband of one of your friends?

I will put you and your son on the Vegas temple prayer rolls tomorrow when I go.

There is love out there. You are very important and it's up to you to make sure you don't fall through the cracks. Yes, it's a ton of work and should YOU have to do it, NO, but you will have to.

HUGS

Bev

http://www.bevscountrycottage.com/beliefs.html

[Guest Yediyd]

Hi

I am not certain I can add any words of deep wisdom here, but I will try.

I am married to a non-member and do everything in the Church for my 5 children. I have felt as you are feeling in a different way perhaps.

There have been father-son activities and such through the years. My husband hates camping and has to be forced go. If it has to do with Church he wants nothing to do with it for the most part. I had to go up to specific people and ask them to take my sons on the campouts. I didn't go to the Bishop. Didn't know I was supposed to. I guess I just chose men who I thought would do it. They did.

Sometimes they went to activities alone.

My advice, humble as it is, is to choose a specific priesthood holder and ask.

There were times when they didn't want to go to Church because of 'things' that hurt. My youngest son, who has had behavioral problems through the years, was totally neglected when he left the Primary. He was supposed to get a certificate, they were supposed to mention it. They didn't. They mentioned his friend who left 3 weeks after him. I went home and cried. He didn't. He was used to it, as this wasn't the first time.

Heck there I times I don't want to go- or at least I don't want to hear one more man bear his testimony about how incredible his wife is and how thankful he is they are a forever family. My heart aches too. I was baptized 27 years ago and was married 28 years ago. I cannot and won't give up...

Sometimes I think this is part of enduring to the end. We have to grin and bear it and face pain, learn to deal with it and move forward. :)

Don't YOU give up mom! And don't let him. This is how we grow.

People are just not perfect. I have found that everywhere we have lived, if something needs to be done, everyone assumes everyone else has taken care of it. You have to speak to someone you want to be the one to mentor your son, or take him on a campout. A home teacher perhaps? Husband of one of your friends?

I will put you and your son on the Vegas temple prayer rolls tomorrow when I go.

There is love out there. You are very important and it's up to you to make sure you don't fall through the cracks. Yes, it's a ton of work and should YOU have to do it, NO, but you will have to.

HUGS

Bev

http://www.bevscountrycottage.com/beliefs.html

wow Bev,

You are right, and I am humbled. I HAVE gone to specific priesthood holders and I HAVE gone to my home teachers...

I'm not sure what to do next, but giving up is not an option. Thank you for the prayers...

The Bible says to train up a child in the way that he should go and when he is old, he will not depart from it...

I just need to keep doing what I am doing...

hopefully, the Holy Spirit will inspire my Bishop...he is aware of the problem.

Thank you for helping me to realize that I am not alone.

Yediyd

[Traveler]

The greatest failing is with your home teachers. I would tell you to talk to your high Priest group leader. Single mothers are his responsibility.

It is possible that there are reasons for their oversight - though I can't think of any and would rather not get into that. The bottom line is that being a victim and blaming others is no way to go through life. I suggest that you continue to make the best if it that you and your son can. Try to find some way to help your home teachers, your high Priest group leader, your bishop and other in your ward that have not yet caught on to the principles of sacrifice and compassion. Perhaps you and your son could become the unusual examples that the world (and so many members - including myself) need.

The Traveler