LeSellers Posted January 15, 2016 Report Share Posted January 15, 2016 (edited) Correct. That's why a pre-nup is so important.The problem with a pre-nup is that the divorce judge may decide to throw it out. That's why I believe that government should have nothing to do with marriage. It ought to be a formal, written contract and enforced like any other contract. As it is, the state writes the contract, can change it without consulting those who are affected by it, and individual judges can disregard any part of the state contract (or a contract between the parties). Individual contracts could be drafted by churches, fraternities, lawyers, or the guy-down-the-street. And they would be binding. They would include provisions for divorce, children, and any- or everything the couple thinks pertinent, and, in the absence of a specific provision, common law would prevail. Government screws up everything it does, especially those things it has no business doing. Marriage is one of these last. Lehi Edited January 17, 2016 by LeSellers Backroads 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 17, 2016 Report Share Posted January 17, 2016 The problem is that contracts usually aren't life-long. They're set for a fairly short defined period. Marriages by their nature in many religions are not only life-long, but they are vague in terms and are subject to changes in mood for their interpretation and application. I'm not saying that government is the answer. But to look at marriage as a legal contract simply doesn't do it justice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MormonGator Posted January 17, 2016 Report Share Posted January 17, 2016 The problem with a pre-nup is that the divorce judge may decide to throw it out. Right, but it's better to have one. I'm not a lawyer, but most courts (from what I've read) tend to think one is valid unless proven otherwise. Not invalid till proven otherwise. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LeSellers Posted January 17, 2016 Report Share Posted January 17, 2016 The problem is that contracts usually aren't life-long. They're set for a fairly short defined period. Marriages by their nature in many religions are not only life-long, but they are vague in terms and are subject to changes in mood for their interpretation and application. I'm not saying that government is the answer. But to look at marriage as a legal contract simply doesn't do it justice.Right, but it's better to have one. I'm not a lawyer, but most courts (from what I've read) tend to think one is valid unless proven otherwise. Not invalid till proven otherwise.Government is definitely not the answer. Government caused the problems with marriage. While marriage is more than a contract, it is, at its base, a contract. No one's saying that there's no place for love or whatever else you may believe is the basis of marriage, it is a contract between two people. The woman pledges her reproductive fidelity to the man, and the man pledge his resources to raising their children and to take care of her when she's not able to do so herself, after she's no longer sexually attractive. (There's a lot more to the contract than that, but this is the crux of the issue.) A contract would make this explicit. It would provide remedies for breaches of the contractual obligation in either party. It would provide a peaceful means to end the marriage, peaceful because worked out while not under emotional distress. It would alert both parties to the consequences of that dissolution. It seems reasonable that, knowing this, each party would work a bit harder to make the marriage work. It would define how the couple decides in advance to raise their children. It would define the religion they would follow (if any). And, I believe, most importantly, it would define how to modify the agreement. If the couple changes its mind about, say, religion, they could modify their contract. And, because both parties must agree to any change, neither would be in a more powerful position than the other. Contracts are not always about money. Knowing precisely what the deal is, what the most important things are to the other party, and having to define one's own positions would reduce the conflicts and set reasonable expectations. As it is, people take a lot for granted and are blindsided when their partners "fail" to meet their expectation. Lehi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrmarklin Posted January 24, 2016 Report Share Posted January 24, 2016 Just for the sake of discussion, taking this as absolute fact...it doesn't have much meaning. Anyone can support a wife.In the OP, the son is not even supporting himself. Your comment is facetious. mdfxdb 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Folk Prophet Posted January 24, 2016 Report Share Posted January 24, 2016 Your comment is facetious.Hardly. The point is that anyone can. Not that anyone will. NightSG 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 24, 2016 Report Share Posted January 24, 2016 I think only FP can say whether or not he's being facetious. Maybe you meant fallacious? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Folk Prophet Posted January 24, 2016 Report Share Posted January 24, 2016 Maybe you meant fallacious? Even if he did, my response is the same. The OP certainly can support a wife. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Backroads Posted January 24, 2016 Author Report Share Posted January 24, 2016 Even if he did, my response is the same. The OP certainly can support a wife. I figure he can. They both have jobs and they're starving college students. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrmarklin Posted January 25, 2016 Report Share Posted January 25, 2016 I think only FP can say whether or not he's being facetious. Maybe you meant fallacious? That too, I suppose. I guess I've stumblied into some kind of Zone here. Not only the son has no apparent means to provide himself certain basics, but I'm told that by adding a wife he will somehow be able to take care of her as well as himself. Sounds like drivel. mdfxdb 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Backroads Posted January 26, 2016 Author Report Share Posted January 26, 2016 So now his twin brother is considering marriage, and that's the one we're wondering about now (I think it's a twin rivarlry thing... I got married, my twin brother proposed to his girlfriend a week later. One twin proposes, the other one then considers it.) If anyone is curious to the outcome, Brother A and his future wife have found a new cellphone plan and an insurance. Sounds like he plans to take over his tuition as well. Brother A is like our father... something of a cheap tightwad, so I think they can keep their finances in check. He also has the better job. Brother B, however, kind of likes to party... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 26, 2016 Report Share Posted January 26, 2016 I got married, my twin brother proposed to his girlfriend a week later. One twin proposes, the other one then considers it Weird... that's kind of what happened with the twin brothers in my husband's family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 26, 2016 Report Share Posted January 26, 2016 A couple of brothers who looked very much alike and were very close in age married a pair of twins on the same day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NightSG Posted January 26, 2016 Report Share Posted January 26, 2016 (I think it's a twin rivarlry thing... I got married, my twin brother proposed to his girlfriend a week later. One twin proposes, the other one then considers it.) More like he's thinking "well, the family can't say I'm too young..." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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