Thanks guys

[TheCraCraMormon]

Thanks guys! This advice really helped my friend **Rachel! She went and talked to the bishop straightaway!

Thanks everyone again. **Rachel doesnt have an account so I just wrote what she asked on here. I told her she should really get one! haha

**Changed name for privacy

Edited July 19, 2017 by TheCraCraMormon

[pam]

Whatever you may have read, it is NOT true that girls can't confess stuff like that to their Bishop.  In fact you need to have a little discussion before you get a renewal for your limited temple recommend.

[Guest]

The bad news?  Masturbation and pornography are the kinds of things you would need to confess.

The good news?  You have nothing to fear in talking with the bishop!

I have never been a bishop, but I have a daughter who is not too much younger than you!  If she came to me and said she had run into some problems with masturbation and pornography, I would give her a big hug and thank her for talking with me, and we would fix it together.  It was really not that long ago that I was a teenager, and I remember how it is!

I think your bishop will do the same.  

Please consider confessing.  It really is nowhere near as scary as it seems (the fear of confessing comes from the devil, who wants you to be stuck).  If you confess, you will feel so much better, you will have the support of a kind and caring bishop, and you can put this stuff behind you once and for all.

Edited July 17, 2017 by DoctorLemon

[zil]

Talk to your bishop.  Don't go to the temple again before you visit with the bishop.  You don't need to go into any more detail than you have here.  It'll be OK - in fact, after it's over, you'll feel like a weight has been lifted from you.  Don't fear - he's the Lord's representative, and there's no reason to fear the Lord - He loves you and wants to help you.  The experience will strengthen you, and make it easier to recognize and resist temptation in the future.

[Jane_Doe]

12 hours ago, TheCraCraMormon said:

I googled it and it said that there is a gender barrier so girls cant confess stuff like this to the bishop. Also Im not sure if I could confess thatd be reeeaaallllyyy akward. Plus I already feel super guilt and have been praying a whole ton. Help me.

You indeed need to go talk to the Bishop about this.  He's the Bishop over the whole ward, including the girls.  That's a key part of working through the repentance process and the sin-born guilt you feel right now.

If you want to have another person in the room while you talk with the Bishop (if that'll make it feel less awkward for you), you can always ask for that.  

Edited July 17, 2017 by Jane_Doe

[Sunday21]

On 2017-07-16 at 11:37 PM, TheCraCraMormon said:

Hi! Im 14 years old and I am a girl.

I need to renew my temple recommend, but I mastrubated and looked at porn. 

I googled it and it said that there is a gender barrier so girls cant confess stuff like this to the bishop. Also Im not sure if I could confess thatd be reeeaaallllyyy akward. Plus I already feel super guilt and have been praying a whole ton. Help me.

Dear @TheCraCraMormon

i feel for you! How is that daily Book of Mormon reading and prayer coming along? Have you pored out your soul to Heavenly Father? Tell Heavenly Father how sorry you are. Ask his advice on how to change your behaviour. Then, go see the bishop. Any conversation with the bishop that begins with how sorry you are, how you told Heavenly Father how sorry you are, in which you discuss your Book of Mormon reading and prayer, tends to go well. 

I have a friend, five kids, served a mission, hospital administrator, strong member, who had your experience at your age. She went to the bishop. Got right back on track.

Why not decorate your room with pictures of Christ? if you go to 'images Jesus' on google, you will find lots to print out. Your local Christian bookstore will have books with His pictures. You could cut them up and post them all over the room. You could print out a small picture of Christ and put it in your bra or just write his name in fancy letters and put it in your bra. In times of stress, I write 'Pray' on the palm of my hand. You can do this! Lots of prayer! 

[unixknight]

For what it's worth, your Bishop has probably heard the same and worse from others.  It isn't like he's going to be sitting there thinking about what a terrible person you are or anything like that.  In fact, it takes guts to talk to the Bishop about this kind of stuff, and that means a lot. 

Also, my Bishop told me something interesting once when I was talking with him about some of my own confessables... (is that a word?)  He said that once it's been handled and the repentance process is complete, he doesn't even remember what it was.  He said it's like the memory is taken from his mind once it's over with.  I have a feeling that's pretty standard.

[Jane_Doe]

12 minutes ago, unixknight said:

Also, my Bishop told me something interesting once when I was talking with him about some of my own confessables... (is that a word?)  He said that once it's been handled and the repentance process is complete, he doesn't even remember what it was.  He said it's like the memory is taken from his mind once it's over with.  I have a feeling that's pretty standard.

That's been my experience with bishops too: once something is done with they literally don't remember it any more.  Call it "the Lord wiping your slate clean" or "a busy man who has was too much on his plate to bother remembering old stuff", or "something just super nice for me".  

[TheCraCraMormon]

@pam @DoctorLemon @zil @Jane_Doe @Sunday21 @unixknight

Shoutout to you all!

[Just_A_Guy]

On 7/16/2017 at 9:39 PM, pam said:

Whatever you may have read, it is NOT true that girls can't confess stuff like that to their Bishop.  In fact you need to have a little discussion before you get a renewal for your limited temple recommend.

However, depending on comfort zones, it may be a good idea to talk to a trusted mother or YW leader first; and then ask them to accompany the youth into the meeting with the bishop.