Disappointing developments

[askandanswer]

This comes from the online edition of the main daily newspaper in Australia's second most populous State. Typically, Year 8 students would be 14, which is 2 years under the age of consent here. I'm surprised and disappointed to see parents complaining about receiving an email from their kids school promoting sexual abstinence.

A state high school in Victoria has set a controversial goal to "delay sexual activity in school-aged youth".

Parents of year 8 students at Officer Secondary College were shocked to receive an email on Tuesday promoting abstinence as part of the school's Respectful Relationships curriculum, a state government initiative aimed at stamping out domestic violence.

Officer Secondary College parents received an email promoting abstinence as part of the school's Respectful Relationship curriculum.

"Our shared goal is to delay sexual activity in school-aged youth," it read.

One parent, who did not want to be named, said the school was sending students a "damaging, archaic" message by telling them to abstain from sexual activity until they graduated.

"It sets up a culture of shame around sexual desire and feeling, and a culture of secrecy when students are in relationships," they said.

Another parent said that while they didn't want their children having sex early, it was inappropriate for the school to promote abstinence. This created shame, and stopped children from getting help, they said.

http://www.theage.com.au/victoria/state-school-under-fire-for-telling-students-to-delay-sexual-activity-20170809-gxsmij.html

 

[Mike]

I want to know more from people with views that promoting abstinence creates a culture of shame. 

Edited August 11, 2017 by Mike

[LoudLizard]

One parent, who did not want to be named, said ...

let's shut the whole programm down because one parent wants promiscuous kids.

 Teaching kids to say 'not yet' is healthy.  

Kids doing it anyway is not new.  

Shame and guilt are natural responses to sin.

[Twist]

Guide the child's point of view is the most fundamental.

[anatess2]

And you wonder why teen pregnancy and abortion is an epidemic.

[Grunt]

I don't want the school teaching ANYTHING about sex and sexuality.

[seashmore]

On 8/11/2017 at 2:00 PM, Mike said:

I want to know more from people with views that promoting abstinence creates a culture of shame. 

While I don't hold this view, I think what the second parent was getting at was that someone who had sexual experiences (either willingly or unwillingly) may feel shamed and ostracized by their peers and/or teachers, and hopeless to abstain in the future, especially with the shortsightedness of a a 14 year old. 

Personally, I'm torn about sex and sexuality being taught in schools.  Ideally, all parents would teach their kids respectfully about the birds and the bees.  Reality is, many kids are going to learn about these things at school instead of at home, and in that case, I'd rather the discussions start in a classroom than the cafeteria.

[Guest LiterateParakeet]

15 hours ago, seashmore said:

Personally, I'm torn about sex and sexuality being taught in schools.  Ideally, all parents would teach their kids respectfully about the birds and the bees.  Reality is, many kids are going to learn about these things at school instead of at home, and in that case, I'd rather the discussions start in a classroom than the cafeteria.

This is how I feel too.  My parents certainly never talked to me about sex.  I learned from reading a medical encyclopedia (yes, I was that nerdy) and talking to friends.  Oh and from church I learned, "Don't."  

I talk to my children about sex (but they are homeschooled, so is that like learning about sex "in school"  LOL!)  My teenage boys were mortified at first.  They tried to reassure me that their dad had already talked to them about it.  I told them this is too important a topic for me not to share my thoughts.   They are older now and we can speak about it comfortably.  I think they have a healthy attitude about sex.  

[Guest MormonGator]

In my first college one of my classes for my undergraduate degree was human sexuality. It was taught by a nun! 

[askandanswer]

On 09/10/2017 at 9:18 AM, MormonGator said:

In my first college one of my classes for my undergraduate degree was human sexuality. It was taught by a nun! 

You would have preferred a hon(ey)?

[Guest MormonGator]

9 hours ago, askandanswer said:

You would have preferred a hon(ey)?

No, this nun was awesome. When you have an entire class of 19 year olds talking about sexually transmitted diseases and looking at diagrams of the male/female anatomy with a nun and no one is giggling in the back or making stupid jokes, you know that Sister Jean can control anything.  We all adored her. 

[anatess2]

On 10/8/2017 at 1:33 AM, seashmore said:

Personally, I'm torn about sex and sexuality being taught in schools.  Ideally, all parents would teach their kids respectfully about the birds and the bees.  Reality is, many kids are going to learn about these things at school instead of at home, and in that case, I'd rather the discussions start in a classroom than the cafeteria.

I feel differently.

Ideally, all parents would teach their kids respectfully about the birds and bees.  Reality is kids are going to learn about these things elsewhere... so the solution is not to put someone the kids are supposed to trust to teach them INCORRECT PRINCIPLES.  That will be much harder to undo than the kid learning it from the cafeteria that has no authority.

When addressing an issue that veers far from the ideal, the solution is to bring the situation back to ideal.  The solution is to help parents do their job better.

[askandanswer]

On 09/10/2017 at 9:18 AM, MormonGator said:

In my first college one of my classes for my undergraduate degree was human sexuality. It was taught by a nun! 

What did they teach you at your 7th college during your undegraduate degree?  

[Guest MormonGator]

Just now, askandanswer said:

What did they teach you at your 7th college during your undegraduate degree?  

LOL! That's awesome.

Shockingly, I only went to two colleges. My first college basically said "Thank you, we are glad we got to know you. Don't call us, we will call you. " Then I graduated in the top 1/3 of my class at my second college.

[askandanswer]

what happened? What made the difference?

 

[Guest MormonGator]

24 minutes ago, askandanswer said:

what happened? What made the difference?

Mostly environment. I just didn't like the first college much. It was very small. I found myself sort of depressed and lacked the desire/will to study and attend classes. I also had a horrible time in high school (I had virtually no friends back then) so I lacked the social skills needed to make friends. I ate lunch alone a lot in my room or in the cafeteria. I had some roommate drama. My first roommate and I didn't get along and he moved out, thank God. My girlfriend left the college after the first year. My second year roommate and I got along fine but he got into a near fatal car accident on Christmas break. It was announced on TV that he died. I sunk into a deep depression after that and by the end of spring semester I had left the college. 

My second college was much larger, and with more people you are bound to find more people that you get along with. I made wonderful friends (I'm still in touch with several of them, I saw one earlier this month when I drove up north. We drank organic tea and talked about books for four hours) , joined activities (I was on the student senate!) and actually studied and worked hard. I thrived there, it was by far the happiest time in my life up to that point. Just being happier played a huge role. I got great grades, found a major I loved (English) and it was a blast. I loved my time there.   

Edited October 11, 2017 by MormonGator

[LoudLizard]

On 10/11/2017 at 9:43 AM, anatess2 said:

I feel differently.

Ideally, all parents would teach their kids respectfully about the birds and bees.  Reality is kids are going to learn about these things elsewhere... so the solution is not to put someone the kids are supposed to trust to teach them INCORRECT PRINCIPLES.  That will be much harder to undo than the kid learning it from the cafeteria that has no authority.

When addressing an issue that veers far from the ideal, the solution is to bring the situation back to ideal.  The solution is to help parents do their job better.

I agree to some extent.  School is government.  Government should not teach the topic of sex to young tender minds.  Neither people nor organizations can agree on appropriate or inappropriate forms of sex.  

The problem and conflict is public health issues with STDs, teen pregnancy and misinformation.. 

The public needs to be informed about these health issues and schools just happen to be the best location and age that need to hear this.  So opting out of those health lessons is allowed.  These lessons can be mingled with worldly views on masterbation, homosexuality, and abortion.

Edited October 21, 2017 by LoudLizard