crazypotato

Let's not go there again. I am done talking about it.

Mightynancy, I already had plenty of people disagreeing with me and wanting to slap me over the internet. No, I don't listen to Rush at all, or Glenn Beck. However, I was talking about radical feminism, not human rights. I find it amusing that people assume that I would agree that a woman should not have equal rights to a man and be treated yucky. If you look at the website for NOW (National Organization for Women), that is the leading feminist group in our country, you will see a list of their agenda items and priorities. Some of their agenda items are good, such as equal rights, equal pay, anti-pornography, and some I believe are immoral - pro-gay marriage, pro-lesbian rights, anti-right wing (those are their words, not mine), universal child care, etc. And when I read their website, I find a lot of their comments to be men bashing. In my opinion, if you want to call yourself a feminist, most people will assume that you are a modern day feminist, and therefore agree with NOW. I could be wrong. Anyway, don't worry. I got plenty of people mad at me about my comments and I think everyone was arguing over semantics, rather than women's rights.

I think it is easy for us to assume that Joe is shallow and only into looks, but personally, my gut feeling is telling me that his anxiety is getting in the way of things too. He sounds like he is really trying to find his wife attractive because he knows he should, but doesn't know how. I know that I have made like 100 million stupid mistakes in my marriage, too, especially as a newlywed. But it is soooo hard to see yourself objectively when emotions and baggage can cloud your thinking, but hard to accept your own glaring faults and admit them to the public. He was very brave to post what he did about himself and his marriage. Joe, if you get help from the Lord and from the appropriate resources, I think you will be okay.

I understand, Pam. I once listened to my friend go on and on about how gross the food was that people brought her after her baby. Hence, my paranoia. She wasn't complaining about anything I did, but it made me feel bad for all the people that had tried and she was not grateful. Wingnut, I am sorry no one brought you dinner. That is depressing. In case anyone wants to know, I made tacos for one family and I am saving the recipes and other food suggestions. They were all good ideas. I guess you can't please everyone, especially little kids, and it's the thought that counts.

Born and raised in Utah, currently live in the Northwest. Lived in Kaintuck before. 1. Jello--side dish or dessert? dessert with tons of gross things in it at church functions 2. Soda, pop, or coke? Pop. Does anyone remember the Pop Shop in Utah? You could pick your own flavors and make your own bottled pop. 3. Mac and cheese--side dish or main dish? Main dish 4. Biscuits and gravy--tear up the biscuit and eat with spoon or split biscuit and eat with knife/fork? I think they look disgusting and I have never eaten them. 5. Grits--sweet or savory? I have never eaten those either. Yuck! 6. Bathroom tissue--over or under?up high off the roll so the kids can't unwind it all over the bathroom floor or flush the entire thing down the toilet 7. Green onions or scallions?green onions. I thought scallions were related but not the same? 8. Pecan: pecahn or peecan?puh CAHN, only to be eaten in Pralines and Cream Ice Cream from Baskin Robbins

Babies are sooo expensive! But there are lots of things that you think you need to buy that you really don't. I am all for borrowing baby stuff from other people, like swings and high chairs and cribs. Do you have any relatives or close friends that you can borrow things from? You will want your own diapers. I like cribs that convert into toddler beds so you don't have to buy both. I wouldn't spend a lot of money on toys. Babies have such short attention spans and get sick of their toys really fast. I think first buy a car seat. I like the kind that can snap into a stroller. Borrow a cradle if you want to use one for the early stages. Buy the size 1-2 diapers. Don't buy any bottles yet because babies are very picky about the nipple on bottles or binkies and they might not take what you bought, so buy those after the baby is born and then you can return them if the baby hates them. Don't waste your money on Dreft laundry detergent. Just buy any brand that is dye and perfume free to launder clothes in. Don't buy a changing table because you will never use it. Don't buy any formula because they expire and your baby might not like it. You can get used little baby clothes for pretty cheap if you need to. They are so little that they don't really wear out those little clothes unless they have stained them. And of course you wouldn't buy the stained ones. People, especially Grandmas, usually love to buy cute outfits for your baby. Get a used baby bathtub. That's my 2 cents.

In case you have any problems with your milk supply, there is a drug that my doctor gave me to increase my supply called Reglan. It can only be used very temporarily because it has dangerous side effects, like tardive dyskinesia (causes your hands to shake uncontrollably). If you have a medical thing where you are not producing enough milk, pumps don't work in my experience (I had some medical issues, including anemia).

Mirancs8, I think some people find great delight in trying to shock the pure Mormons or get them to stoop down to their level. I think he is watching your face for a reaction and whatever he gets he will think it is funny. I used to work with a bunch of crass, dirty-talking women that hammed it up even more when I was around because I was a Mormon. They loved to try and shock me and embarrass me. They thought it was hilarious. I feel your pain. I think if you could excuse yourself to use the restroom or start talking to someone else, then maybe he will tone it down a bit? I don't know because I never figured out how to get my coworkers to stop.

I also think that wearing interesting clothes and pretty jewelry is totally a good thing. I don't want to look plain. I think the problem is when people wear really expensive clothes and then look down on others for wearing cheaper, plainer clothes. You know, the snobby types that look down on others for not wearing designer clothes. But Eliza R Snow, back when Utah was being settled, had silkworms brought in so that the women could have silk dresses, and it was important to her to look beautiful, not plain and cheap.

If your hair is extreme looking, it is possible that people will misunderstand who you are and assume you are wild and edgy. What is the first impression that your appearance gives to another? Your appearance not only includes clothes and hair, but facial expression and body language. I think women can get away with different hair colors more than men, especially as hair stylists. Personally, whenever I see hairstylists that are always changing their hair color, I think they are the creative, artsy types. What's immodest about that? But if I see a girl who is say, black hair and white makeup, my honest first impression is that she is a moody goth and must be a bit weird and eccentric. Or if I see an older man with pink hair, tatoos, and edgy clothes, I assume he is a a bit of a wild child. If I see a teenager with blue hair, I think nothing of it other than he is trying to annoy his parents. Often, when I am bored, I will change my hair color from brown to blonde or add highlights or something.

Well, that sure sounds tasty. I can do the baked potato and the salad. The steak is another story. . . I'll be over by 7:00. Make sure you are there and wait if I am a little late.

That's a good idea for some people, like people with kids over the age of 7 or something. I guess part of my paranoia comes because my kids are so picky that I assume other people have really picky kids, too. My kids hate foods that are mixed, for the most part. My husband won't eat a lot of things, either. I would be happy with whatever someone brought me, but I have heard other ladies complain about gross meals they have received (I know, that is horrible manners), but still, I feel like I am not really helping out a family if their kids won't eat the dinner that I made. Also, I have people with these unique diets in my ward. Like gluten-free family stresses me out. Also my dear friend had a baby and almost died from complications, but she is so particular about her food. She only eats foods that have a certain alkaline level in it or something. Like the acid alkaline diet or something like that. Then another friend who just had a baby has diabetes. These people, I just want to say, stress me out the most, but so do the regular famlies.

Prince, That's fine. I'm still not understanding your point of posting this on the internet at all. You have made your decision and from what I get, you don't want people to judge you? Then why open up your life for examination? Especially since no one in your ward or family has a problem with it. Plus, if you received your own witness, that is something that usually you should not share with the general public, but keep private and sacred to you. Unless the Holy Ghost is prompting you to tell someone about a sacred, spiritual witness you have had, then usually it is best to keep it to yourself.

Hi Ladies, I hate making meals for other families, like women in the ward who have just had a baby or someone who just had surgery. I am happy to help them, but I have complete paranoia over making meals because I don't cook that well and I worry that the family who gets a meal from me will be really disappointed and grossed out or something. I need to make meals for 2 people and thank 3 more families for mowing our yard with a treat or something. And what do you have on hand in your house for those last minute phone calls to make someone dinner so that I don't have to rush to the store in a panic? Thanks.

That's true. I am from Utah so I am uniform-uninformed. Is there a category for Pentecostal in the quiz? What is the difference between Pentecostal and 7th Day Adventists, or am I highjacking the thread?

In my opinion, who really cares? If someone thinks that cola drinks are wrong for them, that is great. If someone wants to drink them, that is great, too? It reminds me of people more concerned about living the letter of the law than the spirit of the law. The church purposely doesn't overdictate to us our diets. Do we really want to be told in detail how to eat and drink? That takes away our freedom. We should focus almost entirely on Love of God, Love of each other and the other basic commandments.

I agree that you need to be a lot more considerate of the fact that he lost his dad. And I also agree that he is not going to fill your needs and make you happy. Women notoriously go to their husbands to fill their needs first. This is a common mistake. No matter who your husband is, you should always go to Christ first to fill your needs, and you will find yourself much less irritated and disappointed in other people when you learn to do this. Your husband and anybody will always be imperfect but Christ is perfect.

Yes, it is both of your faults that you are arguing, and there is nothing in your post that I see that is not pretty normal and fixable. You have faults and he has faults. What he says about you is probably true and what you say about him is probably true. And infertility, I have been through that too. (BTW, I highly, highly recommend acupuncture to treat infertility. I know it sounds crazy but it is actually valid and really helps). Will you please read a book called "Fascinating Womanhood" by Helen Andelin. You will either hate it or love it. I have had a huge change in my marriage once I read it. It is by an LDS author but not an LDS book. The best parts of the book on how men think and what annoys men the most in a marriage. Then there are chapters on how to be a good wife. It is very 1950s but try and read it with an open mind. It has a LOT of truth in it on male/female differences. Or if you can't stomach that book, try Dr Laura's "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands". It sounds annoying but it has, I have heard, very good perspective into how men think. In my opinion, she oversimplifies men and their needs, but I think it still has a realistic message. You can email me privately anytime about infertility or the books. I would be happy to help you. You sound like a very humble person because you are willing to admit your faults, and you need to start working on your faults and walking away from arguments, rather than engaging in them. Then start reading up in those books. In my opinion, they worked 100 times better than several marriage counselors that I am embarrassed to say I tried.

Great point, Pam. This is something that has been bugging me about the forums on LDS.net. Since most of us assumedly are LDS, I don't understand why people post that they are exceptions to the council of the prophet and then get so irritated when I or other people disagree.

Prince, I wish you the best in your life. If everyone opened their dating life up to the public I am sure we would all find things to criticize about each other. Maybe your question is whether the serious dating thing is doctrine or counsel, and if so, what is the difference? Do you have to follow the counsel in the pamphlet, "For the Strength of Youth" that advices against serious dating? Maybe that is your core question that was lost because your OP is kind of long and has a lot of information in it.

PrinceofLight2000, Did you really want advice, or did you just want us all to agree that you know exactly what you are doing and the rest of us are judgmental or wrong in some way, shape, or form? It's your life, but you opened it up for examination. I am wondering why? It's true that we don't know you. But most of us have life experience and wisdom and are trying to HELP you, not put you down, just give you things to think about. We are not your parents but your tone sounds like you are arguing with the dumber, older generation (i.e. 25 and up), hence, you sound like the teenager that you are. Chill! I for one don't really enjoy making people feel bad about themselves.

PC, What form of Protestant religion are you? Just curious. BTW, I'm 100% LDS, Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons) (100%) Books, etc. Information link 2. Jehovahs Witness (95%) Books, etc. Information link 3. Orthodox Judaism (86%) Books, etc. Information link 4. Islam (74%) Books, etc. Information link 5. Eastern Orthodox (69%) Books, etc. Information link 6. Roman Catholic (69%) Books, etc. Information link 7. Bahai (68%) Books, etc. Information link 8. Mainline - Conservative Christian Protestant (66%) Books, etc. Information link 9. Seventh Day Adventist (64%) Books, etc. Information link 10. Sikhism (61%) Books, etc. Information link

Me too. You can't really get to know a person online or over the phone, even if you spend hours and hours. It doesn't replace face to face meetings with them and their family. Also, lots of teenagers now seem very clingy to each other. I think you feel safe having a girlfriend. Are you the type that fears being lonely? I caught the word lonely a lot in your post. Did you know that children of divorce tend to get more serious with the opposite sex in order to replace the feelings of loss and grief from a broken family/absent parent? Anyone who feels lonely and goes looks to a boyfriend/girlfriend to fix that feeling is making themselves very vulnerable to the adversary. If you are really lonely and have to have a girlfriend to escape the pain for loneliness, may I gently suggest that you turn to the Lord and try and have him be your best friend, ask him to fill your heart and help you with your loneliness, rather than an online person named Kelly. I am sure that she is a nice person, but she has faults, her family has crazy and annoying things about them, she is not perfect and you don't know everything about her imperfections. She will ultimately disappoint you (everyone does). No one can fix your loneliness but Christ.

Hello there, You sound young. I think a lot of young people are a bit self-centered. This is not good but normal. Praying - just pray and don't worry so much about what you are saying, like if it is too informal. I believe God cares about everything that is going on in your life and would rather hear from you than you give a stiff, formal prayer that you don't really mean. My perspective on you is that your natural man side wants to keep sinning because it is pleasurable and enjoyable. But your spirit wants you to stop. All of us have this same problem to one degree or another. We wish that we didn't even desire to sin, but our bodies desire it. So one great thing to try, along with prayer and scripture study, is fasting. Each fast Sunday or any random day you want, Fast for as long as you can, up to 24 hours without food or drink. And dedicate your fast to overcoming your desire to sin. Your body is being denied food and drink, which makes your body weaker, but your Spirit actually gets stronger when you fast.