crazypotato

Maybe watch a chick flick together that is really sad and cry your eyes out together, and then go somewhere really fun where you can laugh like hyenas, like rollerskating or something ridiculous where you can laugh at yourselves falling all over.

If I were a news channel, I would find out what my target audience wants and then cater to them. I would also be more chummy chummy with my sponsors and their political opinions. So maybe in looking at a news corp, look at who pays their bill to see who they are the most biased towards. Follow the money trail.

I just think that both sides, the new convert and the ward need to work together in a realistic manner. Just because a guy is an EQ president, for example, doesn't mean that he even understands the importance of home teaching. I didn't understand the importance of it or visiting teaching for a long time until I started moving a lot as a newlywed into wards where I knew no one. And as Mormon from Utah, I can tell you that lots of people don't want their home teachers or visiting teachers to come, so it makes the home teachers/visiting teachers paranoid sometimes that they are bothering someone and infringing on their time. I think a lot of people do not understand the reason for or concept behind home and visiting teaching and therefore don't understand the importance. If you have never had a home teacher come a lot or care about you, then maybe you have no idea what they are even for.

I don't see how anyone could prove this except for specific examples of news stories that they had first hand knowledge of. But maybe there are other ways. And you are in agreement of me? Wow!

It just happened up here too. A woman's two sons were feeding their mom dog food, not changing her and she had bedsores all over too. The sons are both going to jail. Who knows what is going on in people's heads? I have seen many horrendously filthy homes in my career and often it is because of mental illness or drug abuse, rather than laziness or cruelty.

Yes, I am exaggerating. So are other people who think that "no one should ever judge by appearance" or they are not Christlike. This is simply not realistic.

Sometimes people need to hear it straight. I wish years ago Elder Holland had come over and told me to knock off the way I spoke to my husband. I was totally clueless, totally did not understand my husband, he didn't understand me, we both were crappy to each other, but almost all of my advice that I got was that my husband was emotionally abusive, with the assumptions that I was cowering under his wrath with no self-esteem (not the case).

:rolleyes::rolleyes: I had to roll my eyes lots of times because potatoes have lots of eyes. The "rules" that we are talking about here can be found in your book of Leviticus, chapter 18, verse 12, as everybody here knows.

Dude, I am making a nonconformist statement this Sunday and wearing mine. I also have a hot pink bra that I could wear with them. Am I allowed to judge all the people staring at me and whispering as self-righteous religious fanatics? And yes, we already established that having long hair is not against the gospel and to not judge each other. So I am going to add my hooker hair wig that goes all the way down to the floor. I hate it when it gets stuck in the stilletos and I trip in the hallway. I don't know why those cliqueish women in Relief Society don't accept me into their groups. I think I will add them to my list of self-righteous, judgemental extremists, too. The rules have reasons behind them. As I said, if people feel the long hair rule is outdated, then respectfully wear your hair longer if you wish. It's really not a big deal or worth having an attitude, in my opinion. The thing that bugs me is when I start growing too many green eyes out of my potato, and people ask me to cut them off. Then if they start sprouting, I get looks from others, you know, like they wish they could just bury me in the ground. It really hurts my peelings.

If you exercise heavily in torturous boot camp style for many hours a day, then you can wolf down large amounts of high calorie yummy foods. My husband came back from basic training with no visible body fat and muscles like a rock all over his body. He was eating several thousand calories a day. I hate dieting. I would rather work out for hours and then eat eat eat. My problem sometimes is I don't eat enough calories so then I feel really tired and sluggish.

Is there a button for eye rolling? You're right. Screw the rules! And when you send your son on a mission, make sure he goes to the MTC with long hair, a long beard, and a robe on. Maybe someone will mistake him for a terrorist.:) Again, I think I should be able to go to church wearing my daisy dukes, 9 inch stilleto heels, hot pink bikini top with lightning bolt pattern, so that I can show off my tatoo of the temple. And nobody better tell me to conform to their rules, because I am the ward librarian, dangit, I don't have a youth calling! And how dare you judge my appearance!

That is a good point. He needs to take responsibility for his anger. They both need to be responsible for the words coming out of their mouths and both of them are responsible for arguing. Sometimes men like this get worse and become physically violent. I think a lot of people are concerned that he may become this way. But for right now, he is just being a jerk. Personally, in the heat of an ugly argument between two people, I think each person is not blaming themselves but the other person, and each person justifies to themselves their anger and bad behavior. This is why communication skills should be worked on first.

I agree. Before we all jump on this man for being abusive, maybe we can look at him as someone young, immature, with no skills for handling arguments, maybe poor communication skills, who behaves like a jerk because he doesn't know what else to do. It is true that if someone is yelling at you to leave the house, or yelling at you about anything, you have a choice whether to yell back or leave. "Emotionally abusive" has been any of us at any time we lost our control over our temper and yelled, said something rude to another person, etc. It is a term that is thrown around too much. It would be better for a discerning bishop and for the wife through prayer to first work on not arguing anymore and learning how to communicate. Women can be emotionally abusive to their husbands by nagging, the silent treatment, screaming and yelling, saying rude things to them, and telling them to get out of the house, too.

Those small wards are really tough. They can burn out the people who have to do 3 or 4 callings at once. If there are lots of elderly people that can't physically do callings, but need lots of help, that takes time too. I am glad that you have good Home Teachers.

I agree that garment questions are probably best asked and discussed with the bishop or someone in the temple or distribution center.

God knows everyone's hearts and circumstances, not me or anyone else. If you are doing your best to keep your family intact with love, support, work and friendship for each other, that is more important than specifically who works and where and when. I think that kids can benefit from both parents being interactive with them. I see a big difference in my kids when my husband is gone for long periods of time (military). They really need us both, not just me. I think the proclamation is inspired and something for every family to pray about and try to follow.

I am not a convert but I have moved to many new wards where I didn't know anyone or have any friends at first. It seems that if you have good visiting teachers that actually want to come and visit you, rather than to just do their duty, you can make friends faster. Or if you have a calling where you have to work with a lot of other people, that is a good way to get to know people. The activities can be fun, but if you don't really know anyone, I think it is a bit harder to get to know people at ward parties, for example, than if you have a calling.

Sometimes wards can get cliquey. I am sorry that yours has cliques in it. I really doubt that every single lady in there is in a clique. I bet there are at least a few other quiet, nice people that would like to be your friend. I have noticed that most people have a hard time just going up to someone and getting to know them, because of shyness. I remember before I had kids feeling that Relief Society was only for the mothers and feeling kind of left out, too. There are a lot of women that have these same types of feelings so they dont' go to the Relief Society activities or even visiting teaching. I am sure you can find a kindred spirit in your ward with time. It is hard, but God will help you if you pray specifically for it.

I think we all have crises of faith at one time or another. It is easy to believe in God's love most of the time, but something like losing your mother is enough for anyone to question. My friend lost her mother to cancer while I was her roommate in college. I watched her family, still 15 years later, struggle without her. They were a solid, stable family and all her kids really had serious problems with coping with life after she died - drugs, pregancy, eating disorders, a new step-mom. I have watched her and her family over the last 15 years and my heart just aches for all of them. They are all really good people and you can just see that all of their bad behavior is out of pain from their mother's death. You just touched a soft spot in my heart with your brief post.

True.

But are the medical staff supposed to even see the garments? Even if they are respectful of them?

I forgot about that. My husband has those. Thank you for the reminder.

Wingnut, and Tarnished, I think I will take this to another thread or a PM. I think that frequently, when there is a hot-button topic, like this one, these threads start going off topic wth people going back and forth at each other, and I feel that this is where we are headed.

I think the best solution to the long hair/beard/dress code or whatever issue is how JustaName and Margin of Error described. If you feel a rule is a bit outdated or unrealistic, rather than assuming that the people behind the rules are being too judgmental or self-righteous, how about having a respectful conversation with them explaining that according to modern society, you do not look like a hippie from the 60s? If you don't want to just follow the rule, then don't, but do it respectfully without making a big stink about it. The people making the rules are often just older and still may associate long hair with 60s free love druggie hippies.

Here's my question: What if you are an elderly LDS-endowed member that has to live in a nursing home, for example, with lots of strange people changing your clothing, bathing you and washing your clothes? Is it okay to not wear them? Or have the nursing home staff wash your garments? Or sometimes in the military you are in situations where you have no privacy, I mean none, as far as showering and changing clothes?