Ivy64

Oh thank you all so much! You've been such a big help! I got a much better idea of this now... Of course I always wanted a temple marriage, but right now it just isn't possible so I guess thats why I didn't want to do the whole traditional "walk down the eisle" stuff, but my inlaws are non-members so it would be really nice for them. :) I know this is whats best for us know and I know we will make it to the temple. Winterstar, we too have no money and nor do our parents. We are expecting some though (hopefully) through a buisness investmen but we thought it unwise to wait. WE are whats most important. However getting ready for the if all has made me really think of a receiption and stuff. I mean, it would be such a waste to wear a wedding dress for just 15 minutes right?! I am hoping to use part of my tax return for most of these expenses. We were planning on forgoing a reception but, think we can do it for less then $1000? XD And also just out of curiosity, have yalls families/you been married in the chapel with a less then modest dress? Do they let you? Im going to go to a speciality modesty store here that we are SO blessed to have (face it when you ask for sleeved dresses anywhere the people look at you funny!) I definitly want to be modest and show my intentions to go to the temple in that way too (which is also why I want it in the chapel.) So just curious Thanks again all!!

So long story short, we decided go ahead and do a civil wedding. I have a few questions about it. I knew a couple that got married after the girl got pregnant, they had to have the ceremony in the RS room and not the chapel. Will I have to do that cause I am no longer a virgin? Or was it just if I were pregnant (which I am not.) Also, whats it like? Is there the typical walk down the eisle thingy...kiss the bride all that? Cause I sorta hope not haha Also does anyone know if it has to be MY bishop that does it? Or could it be like my former bishop? Also I have talked to my parents and they are supportive. No questions or anything :) I think really they are smart enough to figure things out but, I am thankful... Thanks in advance :) Oh and I am excited hehe

Just so you know a really good friend of mine also had the same addiction. He went to therapy and talked to his bishop and everything the same as you. He really desired to go on a mission and messed up alot too. But guess where he is now? Yup, he's on his mission. I commend you for having this desire and telling the bishop and your dad and everything - that is NOT easy. And yea you will screw up but know that if you are sincere and endure to the end that the Lord will support you. Especially if you have a great desire, he will do all in his power to help you get there. We're proud of you! Don't give up!!

I have to agree with Loudmouth. Since when has a "seperation" ever been good for a marriage? I agree. It's his way of destroying it, indirectly.

Let me put it simply, and apologize ahead of time for its roughness.... A marriage will NEVER work with someone who does not share your same beliefs. (I can't imagine how you can put up with it anyway.) You must give up your beliefs, or the girl.

Very very good Innergold. Good stuff. To add on the "warn your children of the dangers" thing, did you hear this story? A highschool girl and guy dated. While they dated he took naked pics of her on her phone ( I believe.) She ended up sending it to one of her friends and was sent to another one etc and guess what, everyone was caught. Everyone with the pics ontheir phones were ARRESTED. At about 16 years old their lives were OVER. They would spend the next 20 years in jail....think of everything they will miss... What I think kids don't get is what pornography really IS. iIt is ANYTHING that is created with the purpose to arouse. This can be skantily clad women just as much as full out sex, even the sex scenes in movies now - I mean comeone its pornography!! TEACH them to have the proper perspective....

Sometimes there is no significants, only reflections or particals of thoughts left over for the day or sometimes dreams are just random - trust me I have some WEIRD dreams. But if you feel a particular DRAW to this then it might be the spirit. The only other significance I can think of is the 7 Seals....Signs of the second coming. Do what you feel maybe the spirit is trying to prompt you to, or to understand, but don't go fanatic about it you know ? :)

AH!! I get it! That last one made more sense. It make sense I believe I have even been through that. Thanks!

Im sorry I jsut don't get the whole "fighting against evil only makes it stronger" stuff. Hemidakota's comment is what makes sense to me.

Also, if you can't become worthy over thsoe many years what makes you think you would a year after you are civially married? Especially since marriage usually makes us complacent or we are no long on our "best" behavior...

This is my problem. This is why I want to be civally married first. BUT I know we will go to the temple. You gotta pray about it darlin'...

You guys really need to watch the movie Traffic: War on Internet Porn....

Thank you :) Actually ALL the people I know who have heen civally married first actually did go to the temple later... Think about this I also know many people who have gotten married inthe temple the man is a returned missionary and one of them still ends up having an affair .... so hmmm...really? Its about the marriage. But the temple is soemthing I DO want. I want to repent. I think I needa see a counselor about my past abuse issues though. Thanks for the input :)

My answer is simple. Pray. Ask the Lord not "is he right for me" or the other things ppl normally pray for. Ask if you should continue dating him... BTW, how old are you? You sound young...

You know what?! I have been thinking alot about stuff like this lately. Especially with how much worse the world is getting. My thoughts are: What about the girl who marries the born in the church, returned missionary and he still cheats / gets addicted to porn? What about the couples whose lives are ruined by a church leader who takes advantage of the young women and shes excommunicated? (it happens, I know someone, but I am NOT at all saying the priesthood/organization is bad or anything.) What about all the people who have made every right decision their entire lives and still don't get to live their dreams and watch everyone else live it? (this was me) Here's the answer I have come to. BIG DEAL! I mean sure, some of these things are a really big deal. And I know you are in a world of hurt right now. But seriously I think the church puts on this imagery of a perfect life if you are married in the temple and while I do know the blessings of the temple are real and sacred and their make good marriages I still know PEOPLE ARE PEOPLE and we are imperfect and sometimes fall of course and WE ALL HAVE OUR DEMONS. I know people who have gone through these things, and guess what THEY ARE OK. I know couples married civally who have never had the gospel and they are SO happy. This may not be deep or waht you are looking for but it realy has impacted me lately. So CHOOSE to be happy aand positive. Positive especially. I am sorry to sound harsh but you knew what you married. And just because someone is slipping doesnt mean "get out of the marriage." I mean seriously come on! You know what kind of evil is in the world?! You know how lucky you are you have a husband who knows his actions are WRONG!? IF he is willing to work through it then dont alienate him by showing him contempt! Support him and choose to love him! I gaurantee if you get through this together you will both be better for the experience. We did not come to earth to live perfect lives or see how far we could get without sinning or making mistakes. This is mortality. Find the joy in life - ike a child that grows in you! Amazing! - and make the best of it the best you know how! And I highly recommend you do it wil love, patience, understanding and charity and all the other principles the Gospel provides. Best of luck to you.