rex8499

He can certainly give you away at a dinner, and you can say any touching things you'd like. The "ceremony" just cannot act as a second wedding of some sort. It's supposed to be clear that the wedding is to be done in the temple. I think that's essentially what it says in the handbook.

Exactly. For most of us it's a violation of established boundaries, which must be dealt with to teach them a lesson and save others from similar violations by them. One of my friends who is going to school in southern CA heard 3 miscreants break a downstairs window and enter his basement one day. He didn't have a gun, but he grabbed his sword off the wall and ran downstairs and cornered them with his sword. Then called the cops while they cowered in the corner and waited for the police to arrive. Most criminals are cowards, and I'll be darned if I'm going to just let them violate my place of comfort and safety.

To clarify to everyone, my wife and I weren't angry at each other over anything, it was just a philosophical discussion we were having, along with my best friend who was also there and agreed with me. Well, that's a darn good question which I didn't ask. I assumed she meant things such as being hurt, afraid, happy, etc. Emotions which are only about how we feel, not how we feel towards others. I like that a lot too. It does make good sense. Thanks for the verses and Ensign talks, those are just the types of references I was hoping to get. Keep em coming if there's more.

My wife and I were discussing this, and I still have not satisfied myself with an answer, so I'll open this up for discussion. I'm of the opinion that there are times when feeling angry is a justified emotional response, and that there is no wrong in FEELING angry. Of course, how you act in the anger is a separate issue entirely. But are there times when it is "right" to be angry? If someone hurt my family, killed them, raped them, whatever, do I have a "right" to be angry at them or do I only have a "right" to feel hurt by them? My wife is of the opinion that anger is a secondary emotion which is never justified, and that you cannot feel angry and be living according to the gospel principles. That there is no such thing as justified, righteous anger. I was trying to think of any examples from the scriptures where people are justifiably angry, but none of them seemed definitive. For example, was God angry during Soddom and Gamorrah? Was Jesus angry when he overturned tables in the temple? Was Moroni angry at the Lamanites for everything they'd done against his people as he led the battles against them? I could not find anything that specifically talked about their emotions, just their actions. Though it's easy to imagine them feeling angry, maybe they weren't. Of course forgiving is important and necessary, but it seems like there are times to forgive, and times to be angry and put off forgiveness until the time is right. It's hard to forgive when you are still freshly angry, especially if you feel like you have every "right" to be angry. Discuss!

I get the NRA's magazine, "America's First Freedom" and there is a section in it every month called "Armed Citizen." It relates stories from all over the country where people who had guns protected themselves, their homes, their families, etc. I've yet to hear about any of the incidents I read about in the news, but I find it very eye opening. I'd say that in about 2/3 of the encounters, the intruder is only wounded, or missed completely, and flees the scene after someone opens fire. They are usually apprehended by police, especially if wounded. One thing that quickly because apparent reading through all these stories every month is that most criminals are cowards and don't want a confrontation. Once it's clear that the person is armed, they turn tail and run. If the home-owner only claims to be armed, the criminals tend to call their bluff and keep coming anyway until the person demonstrates that they weren't bluffing. So removing all doubt that you really are armed is a great way to avoid having to shoot someone if you don't think you have the fortitude to actually pull the trigger. Rack a shotgun, shoot a warning shot, some easily identifiable noise that makes it clear that you really are armed and mean business. At that point, unless the person is there to intentionally hurt you rather than rob/rape etc, they will most likely leave.

I've been in the situation, so I know EXACTLY how I'd react. April 1, 2008. I was home alone, at my house in the wooded mountains. Being new to the area, I didn't really have any friends. Nobody ever came to visit me, or even knew where I lived. I was isolated. I was sitting upstairs at my computer desk in my bedroom, working on my tax return. When suddenly I heard the front door burst open and multiple pairs of feet running into the house, headed towards the stairs. I threw down my taxes, jumped up and ran across the bedroom to retrieve the 12 gauge security shotgun that sat next to my bed (I have guns in almost every section of the house, weapons of some sort it not guns). I grabbed the shotgun just as the footsteps were coming up the stairs. Once to the top of the stairs, they were be in plain sight out of the door to my bedroom. I cocked the shotgun loudly, while moving to take cover behind my dresser, aiming towards the open door. My heart was racing 1000 miles per hour. Hearing the cocking of the shotgun, the footsteps stopped a few feet short of the door and just waited. So I called out, "WHO THE &*$# IS IN MY HOUSE!!!!???" Silence... And then a sexy woman's voice, "So I guess this would be a good time to tell you that I love you!" It was my wife and her friend. We'd been married a month, and she'd decided to play a most excellent April Fool's joke on me. About 30 minutes before all of this, she'd called me and talked to me, apparently from where she was going to school, 3 hours away. It was a weekday, and she definitely wasn't expected back home. I safed the shotgun and appeared at the top of the stairs. They tell me I was as white as a ghost, and my heart raced for 20 minutes. I had a ton of adrenaline dumped into my system. She knew where I was, she knew where my shotgun was, and she expected me to do exactly what I did. She was listening intently for the cocking sound to know when to stop. Still, it was a dangerous practical joke. But definitely the best prank anyone's ever pulled on me. I was glad that I didn't have to shoot anyone, but I was good and prepared to if necessary. I think I handled it well, giving the intruder a chance to identify themselves before just opening fire. If you cannot own guns, get some 2.5ft sections of 1" hard wooden dowel from the home improvement store and stash them around the house. They make great one handed beating clubs and do serious damage. I also have swords and knives. One of the more important exercises to do, is to figure out some good defensive positions that you will take up if and when needed. Where the clear shooting "alleys" are if kids are in adjacent rooms. Places to wait where you have a strong advantage over an intruder. Methods of safely clearing a house without being disadvantaged or exposed. I think about stuff like that, and practice it.

In addition to the non-alcoholic drinks, I've also gotten in the habit of having other delicious things to drink around. A pitcher of fruit juice in the fridge to sip on. Try adding club soda to make it seem more like a mixed drink if you're really craving one. The expensive 12oz bottles of orange soda, creme soda, or root beer. If you want to drink something from a bottle like a beer, these are a good substitute. And they taste better than beer ever did anyway. Cans of my favorite pop. But I limit my intake of soda to one or two per week. Too much sugar -> weight gain. lol. A big thing of strawberry milk mix, and chocolate milk mix. A large collection of a variety of herbal teas. Spiced cider mix. There's never a shortage of good things to drink when I'm in the mood to sip on something.

As a guest, a little info in the invite would be interesting and informative I think. But I wouldn't be upset or overly uncomfortable showing up not knowing what it was all about either. No right or wrong way here.

My wife sometimes wears her goth get-up to church. Chains, plaid and black dress, matching combat boots, dark makeup, etc. She does it in an appropriate respectful fashion, and all the young girls LOVE it. nothing wrong with goth outfits.

I enjoyed drinking before I joined the church. Since then, I've made do with non-alcoholic and virgin drinks. Pina Coladas and margaritas and still pretty tasty virgin, give em a try. But there are some drinks you'll just have to live without. Long Island Iced Tea for example, there's just no way to make that virgin style. My favorite non-alcoholic beer is Becks. Better than ODouls in my opinion. Still not the best though.

I started by cutting gummi bears in half and swallowing them whole, with water. It seemed easier to get over the mental block of gummi bears because they are soft and squishy and I'd accidentally swallowed them whole many times before. Good luck.

In my opinion, your greatest commitment and loyalty is to your spouse. They should be the first priority, even over your children. Help him, don't leave him. You should not leave him without just cause. If he wanted to go out and live the party life and divorce you, then there's nothing you can do and you'd have to let him go. But as long as he still wants to be with you, you promised to be with him and help him through the good times and bad. This is one of those bad times. "Divorce can be justified only in the rarest of circumstances. In my opinion, “just cause” for divorce should be nothing less serious than a prolonged and apparently irredeemable relationship that destroys a person’s dignity as a human being." -James E. Faust

No worries, my first apartment was pretty bare too. And now I've got a house and I still don't have a kitchen table other than a folding card table and chairs. Suits my purposes. :) My bed is on the floor, though with a box spring. You'll accumulate "stuff" over time. It's all part of getting started in life. Don't be ashamed by an empty apartment. My first couch was a freebie that I found out by the dumpster. Old granny floral pattern, sagging cushions, no legs so it was really low on the ground. But hey, it was a start. Now I've got two nice couches, both also free. And some nice end tables and a coffee table that were old and worn wood that I re-finished to look nice; total cost about $5. And an entertainment center that was given away for free. And a TV that I found at the dumpster. And a microwave I found by the dumpster. Don't despair. In 8 years I've collected quite the mass of "stuff" and 80% of it was free. Go to the nearest college down during the last days of finals week and search the dumpsters. People throw out all sorts of perfectly good stuff. Especially behind sororities. The point is, there's no reason to be ashamed of not having the nicest stuff. It works. Invite people over. Maybe someone you invite over will say, "hey, I've got a chair sitting in my garage that you can have. Do you want it?"

If he's hinting about proposing he's looking for feedback from you. Give some. :) Learning to talk openly about thoughts and feelings without worrying about criticism or damaging is an important part of being married. Personally, I would not propose or say yes to a proposal unless I was 100% sure it was what I wanted and I was ready for it.

I LOVE cuddles! I would go for it if I was interested.

That's a good point. I suppose if I were wrong and facing eternal torture I too might want out permanently. Everyone probably would. There's no point in enduring it indefinitely.

Lots of good answers so far. :) And where is that? What do you mean?

I was just wondering to myself this weekend, what is the Church's view of this situation. As an example, there are numerous men who go around the nation putting on big conferences which thousands of mainstream Christians attend. The men often have stories about inspiration, or being visited by angels, and the like. But often, they invite tons of people up front to be healed by the power of God, and it is my understanding from talking with family and friends who have attended them, that quite often there are some pretty miraculous healings of the blind, lame, etc. Now obviously our church teaches that these guys don't have it all correct. But the healings show results and do build a lot of faith in mainstream Christians that the men are indeed very in tune with God. So my questions are: Are they healing by the power of God? Could Satan use his power to heal in such a situation to build faith in a false doctrine? I honestly believe that God answers prayers of non members, but these public spectacles seem to be way off base, especially with the amount of money that people offer up to the men for their ministry. It seems to me that God's purposes would be better served if his true church got the best results from prayer and healing, and these other guys were just limp noodles. Just a thought I was wondering about. Any input?

My wife is convinced that the majority of LDS young men don't ever masturbate. I call hogwash, but she states as her evidence that they told her so, spefically her good guy friends growing up. LOL Somehow, I'm still skeptical honey. But if it makes you feel better believing it, ok.

I had a friend in high school who told me that to refrain from sinning with his thoughts while masturbating he focused on things other than thoughts of girls and just went through the physical actions to get relief. I never tried it, so I can't speak to how well it works. But maybe it would work for you. This is my thinking as well. The longest I ever went without it was 6 months, and it was 6 months of hell. Like you said, couldn't ever get to sleep, so horny I could hump anything with 2 legs. Marriage and occasional sex definitely made life much easier in this regard. Here's another question I'll throw out there for discussion. Is it wrong to masturbate to thoughts of your wife if sex is too infrequent, such as during times of pregnancy or separation?

The woman can definitely be the bread winner. Personally, the concept that some women have that they EXPECT their husband to be the bread winner while they get to have the more enjoyable job with the kids kind of bothers me. I don't have a problem being the bread winner, but I don't want it to feel like an obligation based on some universal rule, but a choice that we made together as being best for the family.

I will enjoy this mental exercise. I too like to ponder things like this. Not because I'm suicidal, it's just fun to think about. My wife and I have come up with some fairly interesting theories. But they're just theories, not that we think they're actually doctrine. If the prophet came out and said, "you're wrong" I would say "OK" and move on. But I digress. I don't expect that we will actually be able to get a good answer for this. As people who are dead and know don't give us much info on the afterlife. And people who are dead and then committed spiritual suicide to cease to exist permanently definitely wouldn't be around anymore to tell us how it turned out. If spiritual suicide were an option, would not Satan and those eventually condemned to eternal darkness take that route? It seems like a quick and easy cop out for all the pain they have caused. It doesn't seem to me like they would be given such an option. If they don't have the option, why would the rest of us? Luckily for us, I don't expect the afterlife to be awful enough that we would want to end it permanently.

I don't think the mentioning of clouds during Jesus' return means that it will follow a nuclear holocaust, just that he will appear in the sky. But I do think there is some evidence that we will have a bad nuclear war in the end times. It certainly seems like a logical possibility. But it could just as easily be some other even more powerful technology which has not even been conceived of yet. Nuclear technology is still in it's infancy, but has proliferated incredibly fast. Who knows what the next century holds.

Wow, this brings back some memories. My family watched Touched by and Angel together all the time when I was young. I haven't seen an episode in at least 15 years.

Nope. But you can take all the photos that you want in the hallway, or the cultural hall. None in the chapel though.