RescueMom

Red wine and turkey....er wait...nevermind. Seriously I use sleepy time tea (herbal) as well as Chamomile tea, I know it's not the drugs, but sometimes it works, sometimes not. I work out early, right after work, because if not I tend to stay awake too late. I drink Chamomile a bunch, it helps to calm my nerves...sure it might be a placebo affect but hey what ever works.

After reading this I feel sadness for your brother. Not because he has left his faith, but because he is being forced into an impossible situtation by his own parents. Imagine if our Heavenly Father handled all of us the way they are him. Would we not be resentful and angry? Someone said earlier that it's like death for a child to leave the church. No it is not. As a person who one has left and came back and two as a person whose son has left when I left, it is not the end. I came back. I have no idea if my son will come back or not. But that does not change the fact that he has been taught the truth, that he is still a wonderful good person (despite not being Mormon), and has a great deal to contribute to our Heavenly Fathers plan. Does it mean that I am not sad he left, well I am more sad that it was my influence that drove him out. I suspect your parents are mostly feeling guilty and are more angry at themselves than they are at him, but are taking it out on him. I learned early on that I could not do that with my own son, or I would loose him in my life...and what good would that do either of us? Just because he is choosing to live the life he is living now, doesn't mean in time he won't change and come back. Lecturing and berating him now will do no good. Even the wise can not see all ends. And...and.....the love of God and the gift of the Atonement still apply to your brother....maybe that's what your parents need to remember. After all he is a son of God and has been long long before he was their son. And God loves him and wants him to return much more so than any mortal human can understand.

Have you thought of going to counciling by yourself. Just because he is not willing to go, doesn't mean it won't work for you. Family Therapist can teach you about the tools you need to help yourself and him and the kids. I realize that reading books and watching movies maybe a good thing, an actual therapist can be more hands on in the situation. And as suggested prayer always helps.

Does your wife work outside the house? I think she is feeling a bit confused because she doesn't know what life is going to bring. Everything has been planned and gone forth as planned..the goal she had as young woman, to marry in the temple, has been completed. Now she maybe feelin a bit unnerved as to what her next step is, besides becoming a mother, she maybe feeling a bit overwhelmed by the changes. She maybe also feeling a bit like she hasn't fulfilled aspects of her life because she didn't go on her mission, and maybe that can be eased if she was working outside the house or doing volunteer work helping others.

I think that there maybe too much pressure at times. Really in your early 20's how do you know yourself, your own likes and dislikes. I'm not even talking about education, I'm talking about the ability to go from mom and dads testimony influence to say mission influence testimony and then wham no time to gain ones own testimony or experiences. How can some one who doesn't have a full grasp of what they want and like find an eternal companion with the same interests? I'm not saying wait forever or wait too long but one must know oneself before one can find someone to marry. Imagine if all the couple have in common is the church, sure that's great, but what happens after the honeymoon phase ends and all the physical excitment dies down. Are all conversations going to be centered around kids and church, and that's it? and what happens when the kids leave the nest, do you just have two worthy members sitting around staring at the floor.

Apparently Heaven is going to be really really lonely...it's only going to have one crazy dude with a sign. I'm going need a bigger handbasket.

I can't really add anything except just remember you are a child of God and he loves you. no. matter. what. (((hugs)))

I don't know about you, but I've installed those NASA heat shields to my nicely decorated handbasket.

Sort of. Everyone who has lived on this planet will recieve some form of salvation, even without believing in Christ. We well all be resurrected and that is part of salvation. And even with our works, being baptised...ect..take away the Grace of God and the Atonement, those works mean nothing, and we have to have Faith in the Atonement to reach any level of anything. Every breath we take is due to the Atonement and Grace of God through our brother Christ. The foundation all the works is the Atonement, and we have to believe in it with pure Faith. That doesn't excuse us from the works, but plenty of atheist do a ton of good works. It's our faith in our works that puts hope in us to enter the higher levels of heaven, but only God knows are hearts. I have to think if we are doing these works for our own glorification, we might not make it into the lower levels of heaven. Of course this is all IMHO.

Whoo hooo first post for me. The way I look at it is this: If we do all we can do, go to the temple have that work done...live all the ordinances perfectly and are all around good people this is great. But take the Atonement out of the picture and what does it all mean? I find many LDS tend to stick to the works part, but leave out the faith part. If you flip the words around...Works with out Faith is? basically nothing. It's like building a bridge, we can build and build and build, but the piece of the bridge is the Atonement (Grace of God) and with out it, we are all lost. Faith comes in taking the step, that even after we have done all we can do, that when we step off into the unknown Christ will not let us fail.