tesuji

EricE,
You are trying to understand the gospel of Jesus Christ - specifically here the doctrines of Mormons - through reason alone.
The believing Mormons on this site are here because they have felt the witness of the Holy Spirit that this church is the church of God, re-established in modern times. This witness is a revelation from God. 
Revelation and human reason are two different ways to arrive at truth. In our religion, we say that revelation is foremost. Reason, scientific inquiry are great, but are secondary.
The first principle of our religion is faith in God. In other words, trusting in God. Do we trust in him blindly? No, we have the Holy Spirit telling us these things are true. We have past experience with God - when we obeyed and followed him, he blessed us.
Is God understandable to us? Not fully.
Can we learn things about him, and understand him partly. Yes, but maybe in the way an infant understands its parents. We believe in the future we will learn and grow to understand him more fully. But the primary way to do this is by obeying him - by analogy, by going to his class and doing his homework; by letting him teach us.
It seems like you are insisting on understanding God fully, right now. Mormons would say this is like an infant trying to understand where mom or dad go every morning to do their job, and insisting its parents explain what they do at work. Will the infant understand anything they say?
Why did God allow women and children to be burned? I don't know the full answer. People here have given you some ideas. You could also ask why does God let any of us die. Can't we just be immortal? And can't we go through life without any pain?
If you want to understand how Mormons think of your question, I suggest the following talk:
https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2004/04/but-if-not

EricE,
You are trying to understand the gospel of Jesus Christ - specifically here the doctrines of Mormons - through reason alone.
The believing Mormons on this site are here because they have felt the witness of the Holy Spirit that this church is the church of God, re-established in modern times. This witness is a revelation from God. 
Revelation and human reason are two different ways to arrive at truth. In our religion, we say that revelation is foremost. Reason, scientific inquiry are great, but are secondary.
The first principle of our religion is faith in God. In other words, trusting in God. Do we trust in him blindly? No, we have the Holy Spirit telling us these things are true. We have past experience with God - when we obeyed and followed him, he blessed us.
Is God understandable to us? Not fully.
Can we learn things about him, and understand him partly. Yes, but maybe in the way an infant understands its parents. We believe in the future we will learn and grow to understand him more fully. But the primary way to do this is by obeying him - by analogy, by going to his class and doing his homework; by letting him teach us.
It seems like you are insisting on understanding God fully, right now. Mormons would say this is like an infant trying to understand where mom or dad go every morning to do their job, and insisting its parents explain what they do at work. Will the infant understand anything they say?
Why did God allow women and children to be burned? I don't know the full answer. People here have given you some ideas. You could also ask why does God let any of us die. Can't we just be immortal? And can't we go through life without any pain?
If you want to understand how Mormons think of your question, I suggest the following talk:
https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2004/04/but-if-not

You're right - many of the others appear faithful on the surface, but aren't underneath.  This is the best one I've found to talk with faithful members.  (Though in fairness, once I found this one, I quit looking for more.)

I am a fairly new member.  Sorta.
I was baptized in 1983.  I was a college grad with a job when I joined.  I went on my mission in 1984.  I quit my job, sold my things and went on my mission at the age of 24.
After my mission, I went to law school.  In my last year of law school, 1989, I left the church.  I became a very vocal ant-Mormon.
For 26 years, I fought against the Church.  Then, thru a series of amazing miracles, I was rebaptized in 2015.  
I then quit my 6-figure managing attorney position in Texas and, because I believe God wanted me to, I moved to SLC.
In May of this year, my blessings were restored.  I attended the Temple for first time in 29 years.  I am a Gospel Doctrine Teacher.
I love the Church.  I am so glad to be back.

By the way, the parts I've red in what I said may not be strictly doctrinal. I've heard these explained this way and it seems to make sense. 
The atonement is a mystery we don't fully understand.
However, the main point is that you can't get back to God by your works alone. A Savior is needed.
The greek word here for "glory" (as in falling short of) is doxa, which can mean the following:

opinion, judgment, view

opinion, estimate, whether good or bad concerning someone:
in the NT always a good opinion concerning one, resulting in praise, honour, and glory

splendour, brightness:
of the moon, sun, stars;
magnificence, excellence, preeminence, dignity, grace

majesty:
a thing belonging to God;
the kingly majesty which belongs to him as supreme ruler, majesty in the sense of the absolute perfection of the deity

a thing belonging to Christ:
the kingly majesty of the Messiah;
the absolutely perfect inward or personal excellency of Christ; the majesty

of the angels:
as apparent in their exterior brightness

a most glorious condition, most exalted state:
of that condition with God the Father in heaven to which Christ was raised after he had achieved his work on earth;
the glorious condition of blessedness into which is appointed and promised that true Christians shall enter after their Saviour's return from heaven
 

Congratulations on getting this far. I was born a Mormon, but I imagine it must be a major decision to join the church.
First, I would say keep in remembrance what you have felt from the Holy Ghost. I assume you have felt that in your discussions with missionaries, in church meetings, etc. If not, then seek to have that experience. When you feel that, you know it's true. It might be necessary to just take the leap of faith at this point, trusting in God and the witness you've had from the Spirit that it's true.
Regarding tithing, I'm not sure I completely understand the situation with a single-member family. But it sounds like, regardless, you are feeling like you should pay tithing. One thing that might help is not focus on the amount, but that it's only 10% of your income. Personally, I love paying tithing. It's proof to myself that I trust the Lord, that I love him more than money. It's a way of showing gratitude for the other 90% he has blessed me with. I enjoy too the knowledge that it's going to help build up God's kingdom and help other people.
Regarding your previous church, I love the following quote by the prophet Gordon Hinckley:
If you think of Mormonism as adding more to supplement what truths you have learned in the past, perhaps that will help. Also, I don't know if I'm off base, but I don't know why you couldn't visit your old church when you wanted to, if you miss the experience. It might help to go "cold turkey" at first, until you adjust to being your new Mormon church. Also, I am going to assume that once you feel at home in the Mormon church, you will see a lot of new and good things there, and not miss your old faith so much.
I hope my thoughts might help. Best wishes, and God bless you.

The article isn't trying to prove anything. It's addressing critics who think DNA disproved the Book of Mormon - by, as you've said, showing that DNA studies related to Book of Mormon people are inconclusive.

Saying I believe in the Bible or the Book of Mormon is not saying I worship it.  Can you point to where I said that?  I distinctly said that my belief in God is not parceled out like a cafeteria.  The Bible is His Word.  So is the Book of Mormon.  If I worship God, I accept His word, right?
If someone sees me carrying my Book of Mormon and asks me if I believe that is the Word of God, I will not lie....even if it costs me my life.
Are you saying you would lie?

I would die for it...not because it is a book, but because it is part and parcel to my beliefs.  I would not believe the Book of Mormon or the Bible if I did not believe in God.  How can I separate God from His Word?  He is the Gospel....the Good News.  
I doubt anyone would threaten my life over the Book of Mormon that was not also threatening it over my belief in God.

People often bring up the DNA question in a thread like this. So here, read this:
https://www.lds.org/topics/book-of-mormon-and-dna-studies

As others have said, we don't know where it took place. I personally think most discussion of "Book of Mormon geography" is a waste of time, because of this.
I don't think we know much of what was happening in the world 2000 years ago. We have sparse records and most everything else is buried. How can we even know how much we don't know? 
One of the most famous civilizations - the Greeks - for them we have an estimated only 5% of the records that they wrote.
However, if it all took place in the jungles of Yucatan, then in that case I would't be surprised we haven't found much. Wood, etc will have rotten away. Iron and steel would be rusted away. Everything else could be covered with jungle. And maybe some of the stuff we've found is BoM stuff, who really knows.
Swords, horse bones, etc - I think we do have some evidence for that kind of thing. Here's some speculation:
http://www.fairmormon.org/perspectives/publications/archaeological-evidence-and-the-book-of-mormon
http://www.fairmormon.org/perspectives/publications/horses-in-the-book-of-mormon
http://en.fairmormon.org/Book_of_Mormon/Warfare/Weapons/Swords
In the end, though, it's obvious to me that the Lord wants to try our faith, regarding the Book of Mormon. So we put our trust in him, we feel the witness of the Holy Spirit that it's true, and we learn form the teachings in the book. Full scholarly-type evidence will come later - it's not the most important thing for now.
 

This actually has relevance to the current discussion.
If you read the BoM carefully, you will note that there are several places where the author re-states or repeats himself - exactly like you would do it you were writing on metal plates, and could not easily hit Backspace and edit like we can on our computers.
Critics like to focus on how we don't have the metal plates anymore. However, what we do have is the text itself. There are many internal evidences of authenticity. For example, listen to Nibley's Lectures on the Book or Mormon, or read his books such as Lehi in the Desert and the World of the Jaredites.
None of this will convince determined skeptics, or prove to them anything. However, there is evidence on the "true" side of the scale.

People often bring up the DNA question in a thread like this. So here, read this:
https://www.lds.org/topics/book-of-mormon-and-dna-studies

As others have said, we don't know where it took place. I personally think most discussion of "Book of Mormon geography" is a waste of time, because of this.
I don't think we know much of what was happening in the world 2000 years ago. We have sparse records and most everything else is buried. How can we even know how much we don't know? 
One of the most famous civilizations - the Greeks - for them we have an estimated only 5% of the records that they wrote.
However, if it all took place in the jungles of Yucatan, then in that case I would't be surprised we haven't found much. Wood, etc will have rotten away. Iron and steel would be rusted away. Everything else could be covered with jungle. And maybe some of the stuff we've found is BoM stuff, who really knows.
Swords, horse bones, etc - I think we do have some evidence for that kind of thing. Here's some speculation:
http://www.fairmormon.org/perspectives/publications/archaeological-evidence-and-the-book-of-mormon
http://www.fairmormon.org/perspectives/publications/horses-in-the-book-of-mormon
http://en.fairmormon.org/Book_of_Mormon/Warfare/Weapons/Swords
In the end, though, it's obvious to me that the Lord wants to try our faith, regarding the Book of Mormon. So we put our trust in him, we feel the witness of the Holy Spirit that it's true, and we learn form the teachings in the book. Full scholarly-type evidence will come later - it's not the most important thing for now.
 

I think we already had a major discussion of this recently?...
I believe it was an actual historical record written by the authors who claim they wrote it, then translated by Joseph Smith. How can you be a believing Mormon and not accept this? 
 

Says you lol.
Besides, I watch a lot of scifi....
I could EASILY hedge up all inconsistencies by presuming that God, being all powerful...  has the powers to make things and people, disappear, time travel, and instantly teleport.
But that would be another thread entirely, and I don't have the time for that.

And the editor was a military general.

I enjoyed this article by Book of Mormon Central & the Interpreter Foundation: The Imperative for a Historical Book of Mormon
I've also enjoyed this video, in particular the second half of it referring to the correctness of the BOM.
 

This actually has relevance to the current discussion.
If you read the BoM carefully, you will note that there are several places where the author re-states or repeats himself - exactly like you would do it you were writing on metal plates, and could not easily hit Backspace and edit like we can on our computers.
Critics like to focus on how we don't have the metal plates anymore. However, what we do have is the text itself. There are many internal evidences of authenticity. For example, listen to Nibley's Lectures on the Book or Mormon, or read his books such as Lehi in the Desert and the World of the Jaredites.
None of this will convince determined skeptics, or prove to them anything. However, there is evidence on the "true" side of the scale.

Yes. There are at least three different questions in the OP - 1) Did the Book of Mormon exist as and actual document written on metal plates, as Joseph Smith reported, 2) Did Joseph translated it accurately and 3) is the information in the book accurate?
Yes, Yes, and As accurate as any such account would be. 

That's true, it's principles are eternal, and it is the most Christ-centered book on the planet.
But if it is a big fat fairy tale, everything that Joseph did is based on a falsehood, and he is a false prophet, and the Church he Restored is false, and the Priesthood he received is false, and the ordinances he received are false.
It's either true or it is not. If not, nothing else in the Restoration is true, either.
Lehi

How else could one see it?
Again, within  the limits Moroni established about errors.
Lehi

I think we already had a major discussion of this recently?...
I believe it was an actual historical record written by the authors who claim they wrote it, then translated by Joseph Smith. How can you be a believing Mormon and not accept this? 
 

If @pam would let me change my username, I may have found a solution to the size of the MySQL memory footprint.

More recent versions of MySQL better handle large tables but... in the end you are still just writing to a single file. And when that file contains rows numbering in the millions, and multiple people are trying to write to it, it can be slow. To help alleviate this, we switched to using Amazon Aurora, which has definitely helped.
We consider the many many posts in this forum to be valuable. If we ditch all the current posts and/or archive them, they no longer are all searchable in one place.
I hope that one day the software will make archived posts searchable (such that new posts update quickly, but old posts are still searchable), but that is presently not the case. 
(for those that care there is a whole thread about this in the software forums)