omegaseamaster75
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Posts posted by omegaseamaster75
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11 hours ago, askandanswer said:
My experience is that THE ONLY way you can know whether or not you should marry someone is by prayer and the guidance of the Holy Ghost. I really don't think there are any other relevant considerations.
I disagree, you need to have qualifiers make a decision based on what you want in a spouse make sure your potential mate meets those or most of them and then take it to the Lord.
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45 minutes ago, dprh said:
Nope, the question is still should the OP should consider marrying her boyfriend who has struggled or does struggle with a porn addiction. Your answer was a flat "No." Nothing added about it being a deal breaker for some and not for others. Your follow up post said that same thing. She should not marry him because of his issues with porn.
If you really think he can be redeemed, I think you need to add some qualifiers in your responses and not be so adamant in answer.
I can see that this is a subject that strike close to home. When we are deciding about who we are going to marry we need to weigh out the pros and cons. For many this might be on con side of the ledger. if it is on the con side the individual needs to ask them selves if they can live with this or not. For many this is a non starter. Just like marrying a girl with brown hair would be a non starter.
I recommended that the OP not marry this individual based on the wording she used (addiction).
I also asked the OP to qualify how she defines addiction to porn. Also the Boy Friends definition of addiction.
I have not seen a response to either question. Those responses may change my opinion.
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1 hour ago, Vort said:
This is a question that each of us could ask, and many would not know the true answer beforehand. This is also a question that fits into the old warning against searching out things that you really don't want to know.
I agree, I would not ask that question of my wife unless I was sure of the answer, and maybe even then I might not ask, I wouldn't want to be blindsided.
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2 hours ago, dprh said:
You are saying that her decision can be boiled down to his porn addiction. Flat out. No other consideration.
Yes of course it can, some things can be deal breakers. This maybe a deal break for the OP we don't know.
2 hours ago, dprh said:It seems like you would apply this to anyone this guy would consider marrying.
Yeah, we all have our check lists of people we will and will not marry. This should be on the list.
2 hours ago, dprh said:As long as he's being honest with the woman he dates, he won't get married in the temple.
Not true at all, for some this may not be a deal breaker and he should be honest. I commend him for it.
2 hours ago, dprh said:I believe this man is redeemable and can be part of a happy healthy marriage. He's already pursuing help. Having a person to be accountable to is a huge benefit in recovery..
I agree I also believe he is redeemable, in fact I/we have no idea where he is in his recovery or repentance process I only wish the best for those who have these struggles.
2 hours ago, dprh said:My issues were not limited to pornography and those are what has caused most of my wife's pain. If I had gotten ahead of my issues before marriage, our relationship now would be much different.
So the question is, would your wife have married you knowing what she knows now?
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On 3/12/2020 at 4:25 PM, LewisC said:
I don't mean to sound silly here but what kind of privileges? I don't believe my children have many privileges, I don't let them go out alone with friends, I don't give them money every week, I can't think of any privilege to take away from them
Do they have iphones? social media accounts? TV access etc. take her phone away I bet compliance is just around the corner.
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On 3/10/2020 at 4:12 PM, dprh said:
This seems harsh. Are you saying someone with a porn addiction (compulsive use disorder) are not able to overcome their weakness and be worthy?
I didn't say that, not at all of course someone can overcome their weakness and become worthy. the OP is asking about marriage and by your own self admission your wife has suffered due to your own weakness. The OP now has the opportunity to decide if this is something she wants to deal with in her life. The obvious answer is no if she knows before hand this needs to factor into her decision about whether to marry this individual or not.
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On 3/7/2020 at 9:42 AM, Idrawhorses said:
I've been dating a wonderful guy for about 6 months. I knew up front that he had a pornography addiction that had started at a very young age and has had a massive impact on his life. Pornography addiction is, at the core, a dopamine addiction, I know.
He hadn't been temple worthy for quite some time and wasn't when we started dating. He finally was able to stop regular pornography use and go back to the temple recently. He's always been honest with me in every aspect regarding his addiction.
He wants to marry me, but he is waiting and respectful of my decision. Part of me really wants to get married, but I think I need to wait until he's been clean longer.
How long should he be clean before I consider discussing marriage again and possibly getting engaged? Any general advice?
Don't do it, don't marry him. No amount of time will be enough for you to declare him clean. You have used the word addiction so I am assuming worst case here. If he is an addict you cannot/should not marry him.
How do you define addiction to pornography?
How does he define addiction to pornography?
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21 hours ago, LewisC said:
My daughters have both expressed some nervousness around having another person live with us and how it will change the family dynamic we have now, they are both anxious in general which they get from their mom. Although, when they spend time with my fiancee they get on well. My 18 year old son he hates the idea of me marrying another woman and that is something I can't see ever changing. He has never spoken to my fiancee even when they have rarely crossed paths and he has said horrible things about her to me. I would say it is him who I could lose if I marry my fiancee. My 19 year old son has met my fiancee but for most of our relationship he has been on his mission, however he seems the most open to me marrying again, all be it not entirely comfortable.
In my opinion they will never be entirely comfortable with it. I love my fiancee but I have moments where I feel guilty or confused, so it isn't a surprise to me that 3 of my children have mixed emotions. My 18 year old is just angry about the entire situation.
My advice which i stated just moments ago is to wait. You have Minor children get them raised and then get married. Maybe your son will come around by then maybe not. At any rate he can't make the argument that it is negatively affecting his siblings.Be patient and think about the long term consequences of alienating your children. Once they are adults do what you want but if you ever want to see and visit grand kids or be invited to family events pump the brakes.
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On 3/7/2020 at 8:04 PM, Fether said:
Tell your kids what your kids should tell you if you don’t approve the their marriage.
”too bad so sad”
Bad advice, minor children are involved. OP don't be selfish raise your kids and then get married. Wasn't losing their mother hard enough on them? Take a step back and think about whats best for them. The youngest will be out of the house before you know it and you still have plenty of time to get married.
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On 3/4/2020 at 8:54 PM, rustyoz said:
.The whole point of the post, wasn't about the 5 dollars. The money was irrelevant. I understand completely the principle of tithing which isn't about money, it's about faith. The point of the post was about whether or not tithing should be paid on money received which is technically a reimbursement of expenses. It's no different than if someone had·$20 petrol in their shed and you get the petrol from them and give them $20. They wouldn't pay tithing on the 20 because they we're just recovering what was already paid.
@rustyoz I'm on your side, but you have bigger fish to fry. Namely the free loading adult sharing your home with you.
Decide where you want to plant your flag pole. Which castle do you want to defend? the $5/week. which adds up by the way for those who poo-poo it. That's $260/year that the OP doesn't get to see. Or the Freeloader who you should kick out. You net savings will be much bigger with the freeloader gone.
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15 hours ago, Grunt said:
Thanks. I wonder if this is something the Bishop just prefers to do himself, or if they are expecting it to be put more in line with what you are all saying.
Every Bishop works differently, the executive secretary serves at his discretion. I served as Ex Secretary to our former Bishop and I kept his calendar, made the agenda for Bishopric Meeting and Ward council, Kept him on schedule with his appointments. (our ex Bishop would run over on everything if I didn't knock on his door). I also filtered out who would see the bishop and who wouldn't (to an extent) but basically if your wanted a meeting with the bishop you had to contact me, get on his calendar or he wouldn't see you. You would be shocked at how many people want to see the guy for the most mundane things, his time is precious and limited.
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1 hour ago, pam said:
My own grandmother's patriarchal blessing said she would see the Second Coming of Christ. She died in 1987 at the age of 82. Was the patriarch wrong? I don't think so. I think she will see the Second Coming of Christ.
It all depends on how you interpret it. What did your grandmother think when she received the blessing? Did she think that she would witness in life the second coming?
Maybe the patriarch was wrong. We don't know. Of course now that she has passed clearly she will arise and welcome Jesus upon his triumphant return just like the blessing said.
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2 hours ago, Jersey Boy said:
There might be a perfectly non-sensational explanation to the General Authority’s comment. I say this because most Latter-Day Saints appear to be unaware of the fact that the scriptures clearly testify all worthy individuals will “be around” at the Second Coming. Those saints who have already been resurrected, such as Peter and Moroni, will descend to the earth by the millions with the Lord. Then those who have ‘died in the Lord’ will be resurrected and ascend through the air to meet him and the previously resurrected multitude and descend to the earth with them. Finally, those who are alive on the earth and worthy of the honor will die, and then be resurrected in the ‘twinkling of an eye,’ and also ascend to meet the Lord and his gathered resurrected hosts before they all descend to the earth. So all the worthy will ‘be around” at the Second Coming.
Those living on the earth who survive the destructions attendant to the Second Coming, but who are not worthy of the privilege of ascending to the Lord and his hosts and descending with them, will be like unto the Nephites who were visited by the Savior around the time of his resurrection — more righteous than those who were destroyed but not yet fully converted.
it would be very interesting to hear what this General Authority said before and after his comment so as to be able to understand what he said in full context.
I was there, he didn't quantify his statement, it was part of his testimony. He said it and moved on to other aspects of his testimony.
I agree that all worthy individuals will "Be around" but the way he said it, it was as if he would be alive in this life to see it. I guess you had to be there.
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3 hours ago, Rimon said:
Well, you didn’t need to share it to the online world if you truly believed he shouldn’t have shared it with you. That’s not cool.
No one said this was a top secret meeting, and I think we need to be able to discuss openly what our leaders say. I think this 70 stepped in it. That's my opinion. I don't think it was purposeful, nor with the intent that people think that the 2nd coming is eminent, but members have a tendency to take things very literally.
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I was at a leadership training this past weekend and present there was an apostle and 3 GA's, the temple president and the mission president for our area. There were about 110-120 in attendance so a somewhat small group.
They did a little Q&A which was fine and wrapped everything up with testimonies. One of the GA's got up and as part of his testimony said that he would be around for the second coming of Christ.
This GA is 56 years old and I am younger than him. I do not suppose that this was a conscious statement, but he did say it. I think it was a not well thought out statement. My experience has shown me that many take the words of our leaders and run with them as if it was the voice of God speaking to them. I take this as one mans opinion and if he has received confirmation about the his role in the 2nd coming it should not be for public consumption. Our leaders need to be careful about the things they say and how they say them.
Just an observation.
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Ran into this guy today he seems very concerned
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15 hours ago, Scott said:
So what are people's opinion (meaning members of this forum) on forced quarantines for outbreaks?
I'm just curious.
In socialist or communist countries not good. I am speculating that that take you to an internment camp and if you get better you get better and if you don't they just let you die.
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On 5/28/2019 at 9:51 PM, Alemmedial said:
I read in the bom profets who cried unto the Lord all day and all night, but how did they do it without being repetitive?
Pray to a certain extent by its nature is repetitive. Think about why you pray. God knows all of our wants and desires, he knows whats in our hearts. He knows that we want our food to be blessed, that we want grandma to get better, that we want good things for our children. Why then do we ask for the same things over and over?
Vain repetition has been discussed and I think we can all agree that this is something to avoid. So OP why do you pray at all?
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On 1/16/2020 at 1:29 PM, carlimac said:
She's a very good, spiritually in -tune person. So I'm not trying to question her integrity at all. I'm just wondering if we Church members tend to put more stock in "impressions" than we should.
Yes we do.
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2 hours ago, Fether said:
I picture The twelve apostles, whole quorum of the 70, tabernacle choir, and 21,000 people seated on folding chairs in the middle of the woods.
they wont fit
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There has been a lot of hype leading up to the conference that we are going to have in April. President Nelson asking the saints asking us to prepare ourselves and review our personal history with the BoM saying it will be a hinge point in the history of the church, to him pumping it up in the last conference. "next April will be different from any previous conference." "general conference next April will be not only memorable; it will be unforgettable."
What exactly can we expect to see? WHy the hype? we should be tuning in anyways right?
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On 11/15/2019 at 8:37 AM, Grunt said:
Duct tape is the only thing that comes to mind.
While duct tape is not a bad idea it may do irreparable harm to he Psyche of the kid.
If you have kids that are that out of control you need to start kicking them out. It is not fair to the other kids who want to learn and participate. You need to have a frank (difficult) discussion with the parents about the behavior of their kid. You will probably get push back on this because some parents like to stick their heads in the sand. Bottom line if they won't behave in a normal manner they are not welcome.
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14 hours ago, Fether said:
As I understood it:
1) Scrap everything
2) Find our what the youth WANT. Don’t impose goals and standards on them. find out where they are interested in and what they want to accomplish. No arbitrary goals or goals set by others.
3) base activities around creating a healthy relationship with everyone and accomplishing their goals
4) All youth run. (Will likely need some coaxing in some circumstances)
Everything else talked about we’re just tools to accomplish this
The new plan seems to be that there is no plan.
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On 11/15/2019 at 7:27 PM, Godless said:
Yep. Rudolph attempted to remove Garrett's helmet first, then kicked him in the groin. Garrett's actions were absolutely inexcusable, but Rudolph wasn't innocent in this fiasco.
Disagree. As I said, Garrett's actions were inexcusable, but he didn't initiate the altercation, and he seemed genuinely remorseful afterward. You rarely see that from players after a fight or dirty play. Ndamukong Suh and Vontaze Burfict come to mind, and the latter's career may finally be over.
Does it really matter who started it? You can't go from a scuffle to a full blown assault and not expect severe consequences. While I think that Garrett has recognized that he did something wrong I don't think he believes that his actions were criminal. I do think that they were. If I were Rudolph I would file criminal charges.
Behold the enemy
in General Discussion
Posted
Welcome to my world as a Bay Area resident I am subjected to this mindlessness on a daily basis. I'd bet $100.00 that this lady lives in SF in a nice Victorian, has a designer dog, sends her kids to private school, is a vegan, has season tickets for the Opera and ballet, cheats like crazy on her taxes and hates Trump for no other reason than that he is Trump.