Are You a Christian?

[MorningStar]

Last week I was at Fred Meyer getting some chicken for our dinner when a woman started talking to me and asked, "Are you a Christian?"

I told her yes and she said, "I'm a victim of identify theft. Can you help me out?" I don't know if she is really, but I had no cash and wasn't sure if I should give it to her anyway. I'm not a victim of identity theft, but we've got major bills piling right now.

I found the question odd though because maybe there is an Atheist who would be happy to help her out and she made it sound like Christians are obligated to give money when it's requested.

She was approaching everyone in the store asking them the same question. What would you have done for her? I think if I had felt better, I would've taken down her number and tried to track down a way to get her some help. I don't know all the steps to take when your identity has been stolen.

[Traveler]

The only time that I have been treated dishonestly in doing business is when I have been told that I could trust someone because they are good Christians or responsible LDS (not that LDS are different than Christian - only that I live in a LDS dominated society).

The way I handle such things now is that I take out my cell phone and ask for their bishop or minister. I quick call can clarify many things.

This does not mean that I will or not help but it does determine if I help with cash or by other means.

The Traveler

[Truegrits]

I also rarely carry cash. I think my first thought would have been, she is not a victim of identity theft, she is just in need of money/food. She probably thought that asking if you were a Christian would make you think twice about passing her by. I would have gladly given her some of my food items, though.

In my area we have a lot of people being hit hard by the increased cost of gas, food, etc. I have passed several men/women parked on the side of the road holding signs that say...Please help my family...or Need food for family;will do chores...

It is a very hard time for many...

[DigitalShadow]

I've had unauthorized use of my checking account and credit cards before. It sucks, but a few calls to the bank straightened it out relatively easily. I understand there are much worse forms of identity theft, but I think if she truely had a problem with identity theft, there are other places she could contact to get help.

My guess is that it's just another made up story used to beg for money and that her question of whether or not you are a Christian gives her something to make you feel guilty for.

Either that or she really is down on her luck and has a serious prejudice against atheists.

[Hemidakota]

Last week I was at Fred Meyer getting some chicken for our dinner when a woman started talking to me and asked, "Are you a Christian?"

I told her yes and she said, "I'm a victim of identify theft. Can you help me out?" I don't know if she is really, but I had no cash and wasn't sure if I should give it to her anyway. I'm not a victim of identity theft, but we've got major bills piling right now.

I found the question odd though because maybe there is an Atheist who would be happy to help her out and she made it sound like Christians are obligated to give money when it's requested.

She was approaching everyone in the store asking them the same question. What would you have done for her? I think if I had felt better, I would've taken down her number and tried to track down a way to get her some help. I don't know all the steps to take when your identity has been stolen.

Interesting approach....

[HiJolly]

Last week I was at Fred Meyer getting some chicken for our dinner when a woman started talking to me and asked, "Are you a Christian?"

I told her yes and she said, "I'm a victim of identify theft. Can you help me out?"

She was approaching everyone in the store asking them the same question. What would you have done for her? I think if I had felt better, I would've taken down her number and tried to track down a way to get her some help. I don't know all the steps to take when your identity has been stolen.

Been there. She was taking advantage of people, manipulating them. I would have asked her what she needed at the Fred Meyer, and then offered to buy what I could afford for her. When I have done this in the past, they have 100% of the time declined. They wanted cash.

Of course, you could be a smart aleck and say "The Bible teaches that we should be wise as serpents, harmless as doves. So if you leave the store now, I won't call the police."

HiJolly

[MarginOfError]

The method is one we studied in my persuasion classes. The approacher is trying to put you in a state of Cognitive Dissonance. She approached you and established you as a 'Good Christian Person' and then tried to drop the bomb on you saying that she needed help--help that a good christian person wouldn't hesitate to give.

The fact that you seem disturbed, and that you felt the need to write about tells me that she was successful, and did indeed create the Cognitive Dissonance she desired (although apparently without the desired end result). The tactic is one designed to put the two people in agreement with each other before all the information is available, thereby making the request harder to deny. It is widely considered an unethical approach (except in very isolate circumstances), and so I don't think there's any reason a person should feel guilty denying a request when approached in such a manner.

There's the professional part of my comments. Now for something completely different:

I was at scouts on night and one of the other Assistant Scout Masters was telling me he needed to leave early to get to his interfaith volleyball team. They were playing the Mormons that night, and he really wanted to be there. Apparently, the mormon team hadn't been representing the Church too well and there was a lot of animosity against them (when the LDS team was up by 10 points, they were still spiking the ball as hard as they could against a significantly older team, and at one point, hit a woman on the other team in the head an nearly knocked her unconscious).

I remember this guy saying a few things about the team and then commenting, "I know, that isn't very Christian to say about them, but they aren't Christians, so it doesn't matter." I just started chuckling, and I guess from the way I was grinning he could tell I must be Mormon. Poor guy felt so bad.

[richlittell]

That's a tough situation. The advise here is good. Often, giving some other form of help in lieu of cash does help clarify the situation more.

Nevertheless, "are we not all beggars? Do we not all depend upon the same Being, even God, for all the substance which we have, for both food and raiment, and for gold, and for silver, and for all the riches which we have of every kind?"

Consider, also,

"ye will not suffer that the beggar putteth up his petition to you in vain, and turn him out to perish."

One might then, consider the harshness of the situation, will they perish or suffer hardship if we do refrain?

Nevertheless, I have often thought I'd rather hand out 10 or 20 bucks and face God cleanly in the end and let the crime of dishonesty be on the other's head if it so be they are cheating, and if not, then I've done well.

I once gave $20 bucks to a man I'm sure who went and spent it on booze, but my thoughts were, maybe on this day, he'll actually give some of his earned beggings to his ailing mother or what not.

The fact that the woman used a manipulative approach doesn't mean she didn't need the money, even if she was not the victim of identity theft.

In all things, however, rely on the spirit. I you feel overly strong to give or refrain, follow that first instinct. If you feel no such strong promptings, then the Lord has left you to decide for yourself without fear of eternal reprisal for whichever choice you make.

[Rico]

I remember being a parking lot of an Albertson's in Phoenix years ago. I didn't have much cash after shopping, but this man came up to me and said, hey my car broke down. It needs a new fuel pump and it costs $XX. I need to get home.

It just so happened that I had a used universal electric fuel pump in my trunk from another car so I told him, hey i have a fuel pump. Where's your car? I can install it for you and get you back on the road ASAP. He made excuses about how it probably wouldn't work. Then he asked for taxi fare home(the bus doesn't run that late). I told him, no problem, I'll give you a ride home. He walked away.

Fast forward a year later, I was at the same Albertson's and he showed up with the same story. I asked him again if he wanted me to install the free fuel pump. He walked away very quickly.

[Rico]

The way I handle such things now is that I take out my cell phone and ask for their bishop or minister. I quick call can clarify many things.

The Traveler

That's a very good idea and I will keep it in mind in the future.

[HiJolly]

I remember being a parking lot of an Albertson's in Phoenix years ago. I didn't have much cash after shopping, but this man came up to me and said, hey my car broke down. It needs a new fuel pump and it costs $XX. I need to get home.

It just so happened that I had a used universal electric fuel pump in my trunk from another car so I told him, hey i have a fuel pump. Where's your car? I can install it for you and get you back on the road ASAP. He made excuses about how it probably wouldn't work. Then he asked for taxi fare home(the bus doesn't run that late). I told him, no problem, I'll give you a ride home. He walked away.

Fast forward a year later, I was at the same Albertson's and he showed up with the same story. I asked him again if he wanted me to install the free fuel pump. He walked away very quickly.

I think I met the same guy, at an Albertson's in Gilbert, AZ. I offered to drive him over to the Checker Auto nearby & buy it for him, he refused.

HiJolly

[Hemidakota]

The core of this dilemma is whether we use the Spirit when approach by this type of person in making that right decision.

[jimuk]

I have been approached a few times by people asking for money to buy a cup of tea or food, never with a story about cars broken down, i very rarely refuse if i have any cash on me, no matter how little. I get this feeling that they may just be an Angel of god, if they aren't then it does not matter, they might genuinely be in need of sustenance, if not i have still done my charitable best.

[MorningStar]

I remember being a parking lot of an Albertson's in Phoenix years ago. I didn't have much cash after shopping, but this man came up to me and said, hey my car broke down. It needs a new fuel pump and it costs $XX. I need to get home.

It just so happened that I had a used universal electric fuel pump in my trunk from another car so I told him, hey i have a fuel pump. Where's your car? I can install it for you and get you back on the road ASAP. He made excuses about how it probably wouldn't work. Then he asked for taxi fare home(the bus doesn't run that late). I told him, no problem, I'll give you a ride home. He walked away.

Fast forward a year later, I was at the same Albertson's and he showed up with the same story. I asked him again if he wanted me to install the free fuel pump. He walked away very quickly.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! That's hilarious. With this lady, she did look like she was very poor and I'm sure she's in need. I just wasn't buying the identity theft story. If I were well off, I would've helped her in some way anyway because she is obviously in poverty.

[Rico]

I think I met the same guy, at an Albertson's in Gilbert, AZ. I offered to drive him over to the Checker Auto nearby & buy it for him, he refused.

HiJolly

The first time was at the old Albertson's near 19th ave(?) and Indian School. The second time was at one in North Phoenix. For a guy who is constantly having fuel pump problems, he sure does get around.

[garry]

"Last week I was at Fred Meyer getting some chicken..."

Is this the Fred Meyer in Redmond, Washington between Target and Home Depot near Redmond Way and the exit of I-520? My mom had the exact same experience. Did this lady have crooked teeth and blond hair?

A few days ago I was walking on the sidewalk next to Redmond way when a lady in a black car just stopped right there on the road and asked in a sweet voice, "are you a christian?". When I said "yes" she replied, "I'm a victim of identity theft and I need money for gas could you help me out?". I remembered what my mom told me about some lady in Fred Meyer. I looked around in her car to try to verify her story, or at least verify that she's poor and desperately needs money, but I couldn't find any evidence of poverty. In fact I was seeing the opposite. I've known some poor people before and they always drove dirty beat up 20+ year old cars that rattled and barely moved. Her car was clean on the inside, no 8 track tape in here, just a stock CD player, nothing fancy, but one beater car I saw in the past had no dash, hers was intact. The engine was running smoothly too. No misses, backfires, rough idling, nothing wrong. No major dents or parts missing from her car on the outside either. It looked like a recent compact car. Hmmm. I looked at her teeth. They were crooked. Maybe she can't afford a dentist. That's when I figured it out. I looked for her gas gauge, but couldn't see it because I was on the passenger side. I asked her to pull into a parking lot to get out of the way of traffic. She did and I walked to the drivers side and examined her gauges. All normal, and here's the best part, SHE HAD THREE QUARTERS OF A TANK OF GAS!!!!! While I was doing this she was continuously repeating "I need money for gas, please help, I'm a victim of identity theft". I told her, "you've got three quarters of a tank". "Please help I need money for gas, I'm a victim of identity theft, are you a christian?" she said again. I pointed to her gas gauge and said, "the little needle is close to the little F". She looked at her gas gauge for a second, then said, "I need money for food, will you help me out?". I told her, "no, you lied to me once, how do I know you're not lying to me now?" and walked away. I turned back to make sure she wasn't pointing a gun at me and I could tell by the way she was driving and the huge scowl she had on her face that she was MAD! I noticed she was driving a black hyundai.

When I got some time I Googled "are you a christian" "victim of identity theft" and came here.

"are you a christian" "victim of identity theft" - Google Search

I was actually wondering if this was a national scam, but it looks like it's just local.

So if a little old lady with a sweet voice comes up to you and asks "are you a christian?" and says, "I'm a victim of identity theft", and "please help" then by all means help her out. Show her to the nearest phone so she can CALL THE POLICE and report her identity theft. That is IF (that's a big IF)she really is a victim of identity theft and isn't just scamming people for money. I'm sure the police would be a lot more helpful to a real victim of ID theft than if you just hand them pocket change.

Edited March 2, 2009 by garry

[Moksha]

Should have asked her if she would like to learn more about the Gospel.

[rodheadlee]

The core of this dilemma is whether we use the Spirit when approach by this type of person in making that right decision.

i

This is exactly what I do. If I'm moved by the Spirit I give, if not, I don't give. Sometimes I carry change and small bills in a separate pocket so I don't have to break out my wallet and let them see my cash.