How Do You Define Need?

[StrawberryFields]

This year my hubby and I are in charge of our wards Sub For Santa that is where we will sponsor a few families for Christmas. Our ward has collected a pretty healthy fund and I feel a huge obligation to give to the most needy people and those who would go with out if we did not help them. In a year where the economy has hit so many hard I am finding it difficult to decide which way to go. Do we go with people who are in jeopardy of losing homes and may lose them even with our help for Christmas? Do we help the people who have nothing to begin with?

We have visited on this with our bishop and there are a few private needs in the ward that he will take care of which I think is wonderful but the rest is up to us.

How do you give to the needy?

[Guest SisterofJared]

I would tend to go with the people who have nothing to begin with.

I feel sympathy with those who are about to lose their homes.... but what you are talking about isn't going to save them. They have discretionary income, and if they are about to lose their homes, PROBABLY they have been and will choose to use their funds in other directions. If you could make a difference there, then it would be good to do so. But if you can't make a difference then I think it would be awesome to help some of those who have nothing to begin with. What a huge blessing it would be for them... probably a warm pair of pajamas for them would be a great blessing, where such a thing might not make a difference to the people who have the nice house they are about to lose.

It is always hard to know for sure..... perhaps the person with the nice house doesn't have warm pajamas, doesn't have enough food. But it seems that they would be more likely to have those things, and the help you give have less impact that it would have to those who are very poor and have nothing or little to begin with.

Such a big hurting world!

Sister of Jared

[StrawberryFields]

It has been brought to my attention that there are also those who are down at this time of year. I think it would be great to do a gift box for the families we won't be able to help for the Christmas needs. The gift boxes will include items that will feed the spirit this Christmas Season.

Some Soda

Prepackage Snacks

A CD

a scented candle

A Book (any Ideas?)

The box will be delivered, the door bell rung, and then we will flee.

What other things might be simple but safely enjoyed when you don't know who the giver is?

[Guest SisterofJared]

I hope the snacks are homemade. Because the homemade snack along an anonymous card can totally lift womeone spirit... it gives a very personal messge that someone is thinking of them. And it never hurts to throw in some candles or a book or something.

I love the idea of ringing the doorbell and then fleeing! Make them suspect everyone! No greater way to create lots of good will!

SoJ

[BenRaines]

Unless your fund is huge I doubt you will be able to help those losing their house other than to prolong the inevitable. Help those who have a need not based on buying more house than they can afford but who may be out of work due to the current economy.

Years ago as I home teacher I was asked to visit a family as the Bishop's representative and find out what their needs were and to help them establish a budget. Check income and outgo etc. When I got there they had the latest video games, a whole house full of hamsters, etc. Church programs are to maintain life not lifestyle. They were not interested in the jobs programs of the church to improve their income, they just wanted someone to help pay their rent and utilities, while they had many of the other modern conveniences. At the same time I was visiting with them we were raising our four children on one income, wife does not work outside the home, without the latest video games, clothes were bought at start of school year and made to last. No current trendy clothes just what was on sale at Mervyns.

I share this not to say I am better but it is important to get to know the family and truly understand their needs other than giving just to give. I am sure that home teachers, if doing their job, have a better handle than Bishop on those with needs.

Ben Raines

[Elgama]

You know when we were really struggling our Branch President did something amazing he talked to my daughter about what food we ate and one day showed up with a box of food we normally ate except it also included a box of biscuits, some meat ( we don't have very often and is a treat), and much nicer tuna than normal. Nothing lifted our spirits more plus it allowed our money for things we wanted for Christmas to go further.

-Charley

[Gwen]

book ideas?..... the forgotten carols?

[Wingnut]

A Book (any Ideas?)

Depends on your audience, of course. Also, are you looking for something you would find at Deseret Book, or just any book?

[StrawberryFields]

Depends on your audience, of course. Also, are you looking for something you would find at Deseret Book, or just any book?

A book that can bring in the spirit of Christmas. :)

[StrawberryFields]

I love the idea of homemade treats but I guess I must be paranoid but I am not sure I would let my family have something homemade if I didn't know the giver....

Am I paranoid about this?

Thanks keep the suggestions coming .:)

[Kyra]

Book ideas would be those small paperback stories that you can get for $2-$3. They're usually only about 10 pages long, but they always have such great meanings and are great at bringing in the Christmas spirit.

And I agree about the homemade treats. If you don't know where they came from it's hard to know if they came from a clean house or not (among other worries.) There are certain people in my ward who bring treats to us every year that I have to throw away because I know that they're homes are so filthy. I always appreciate the thought and time put into them though. :)

[Wingnut]

I love the idea of homemade treats but I guess I must be paranoid but I am not sure I would let my family have something homemade if I didn't know the giver....

Am I paranoid about this?

Thanks keep the suggestions coming .:)

No you're not paranoid. If these packages are going to be anonymous, the treats should not be homemade.

[Wingnut]

A book that can bring in the spirit of Christmas. :)

Okay, I'll be thinking.

[Guest SisterofJared]

No, you're not paranoid, Strawberry.

The homemade treats idea is for people you know.... It's kinda like the Halloween Boo that people do, generally you know it's from people in your ward.

I was also thinking that one good idea might be to give some gift cards, like Wal-Mart cards and do it early enough that the people could actually use them to do some Christmas shopping. I know when we were at our poorest, we always had people give to us, but we still hungered to buy something for our kids ourselves. And my sister would send money to my kids each year, and they always used it to buy each other presents. Being able to pick out a present for someone you love is a huge blessing, and most people would rather give than receive. We would take the kids to McFrugles... I don't know if they exist anymore, but with $5 the kids could buy enough presents to get one for everyone in our family and their cousins. LOL. 27 cent chapsticks or 50 bracelets... it was all cheap stuff, but they just wanted to give to each other.

[Wingnut]

Books I've thought of:

Amazon.com: The Gift of the Magi: O. Henry, Lisbeth Zwerger: Books

Amazon.com: A Christmas Dress For Ellen: Thomas S. Monson: Books

Amazon.com: The Tale of Three Trees: A Traditional Folktale: Angela Elwell Hunt, Tim Jonke (Illustrator): Books

Amazon.com: The Christmas Shoes: Donna Vanliere: Books (This has been made into a song, and even now a movie starring Rob Lowe and Neal Patrick Harris, called The Christmas Blessing. I haven't seen the movie yet, but the song often brings people to tears the first time they hear it...it's a very powerful story.)

Hope this helps.

[WANDERER]

In Oz we have the Lions Club (a kind of community association that does lots of nice things for people) and they make a Xmas cake as a fund raiser for the various things they do. The thing is...it's a nice gift to receive because even if you're not doing so well you know that this gift is giving to others as well.

If you're giving a gift to someone who is in need and doing it tough...they don't have much to share or gift others with and so when you do have it, you share it...they'll most likely package up some of it and pass it on. So...wrap something up in clear cellophane so they can see what it is, with ribbons and a blank notecard...and throw it in the parcel (we always gave some of it away...we always knew someone in more need than we were or someone we desperately wanted to thank even in a little way and because we hadn't expected it hadn't something to give in return with the budget so tight..and we recyled the ribbon and paper...). I hope that doesn't sound awful...but there's a feeling that it isn't Christmas when you can't give a bit of the Christmas spirit to others and it's always important to bless others when you are blessed...so we thought.

[Gwen]

on a side note, not that i think you would ever do this, make sure you use proper discretion and wording for what you are doing.

i know someone that when she was little she was very poor but she didn't realize it. she went to church and they were collecting food and money for "the needy". when school or church did this kind of thing her dad always looked for something they could give, a penny, potato, something to add for the "less fortunate". one yr the church brought them the food basket. and they did need it but being a child she didn't understand, she kept thinking "but we aren't poor". it changed how she saw herself and her world; it wasn't for the better.

if you are gathering things for "anonymous gifts" then that's cool, anyone could be the recipient. if you are collecting for the "poor or needy" make sure the kids don't know you were there.

just thought i'd throw that out there.

[Hemidakota]

We used to find families who were struggling with buying groceries and cannot afford a simple tree with trimmings. Something to brightened the holidays. All of which was left on the door step and was unknown who did it.

[Guest DeborahC]

gloves, hats, oranges, old fashioned ribbon candy, gingerbread men, a small christmas tree, a DVD of Christmas carols sung by the MTC, a TURKEY and fixings so they can have a nice dinner???

One year my family was down and the church gave us a frozen turkey, potatoes, yams, green beans, cranberry sauce, and rolls.

If it hadn't been for that, we would not have been able to afford Christmas dinner.

It was the best thing they could have done for us!

[countrygirl66]

This year my hubby and I are in charge of our wards Sub For Santa that is where we will sponsor a few families for Christmas. Our ward has collected a pretty healthy fund and I feel a huge obligation to give to the most needy people and those who would go with out if we did not help them. In a year where the economy has hit so many hard I am finding it difficult to decide which way to go. Do we go with people who are in jeopardy of losing homes and may lose them even with our help for Christmas? Do we help the people who have nothing to begin with?

We have visited on this with our bishop and there are a few private needs in the ward that he will take care of which I think is wonderful but the rest is up to us.

How do you give to the needy?

I have a couple of thoughts. My mom used to make boxes with a few groceries to take to the elderly widowed sisters in our ward growing up. (if you have someone like that on your list) We would take the box to the door and then come in an visit for about an hour. I can testify that the sharing of our time to visit with them meant more than the food. I remember one sister especially. (she had very little and was about 85) We sat in her little kitchen and I remember her putting an extra peice of wood in her cook stove because I was there. She gave me sugar cubes and I watched my mother laugh and visit with her. (so don't run away if it is someone lonely) (IMO)

As for what to put in the boxes. The church has a christmas video that is free and maybe some other things. Also maybe talk to the primary about recording the children singing songs of Christmas. You can burn a whole bunch of cd from this for really cheap.

We don't have as much to donate this year so we are doing the following.

I am letting the kids pick some things out of the food storage to make a couple of baskets. Then we are going to use some of our Christmas decorations we already have to decorate them. If they are going where kids are I am taking something out of our Christmas gifts we have already and put in there.

Good luck. Also a lot of grocery stores (if you decide to do grocery store gift cards) will give you a discount if you talk to the manager or they can tell you where to get one.

As far as books (ask around your ward, I know I have several that look like new that I have read and just sit here)

It is a huge responsibility to be entrusted with such sacred funds. It sounds like you have a lot of families in need. Pray and you will know what will be best for each family. (it can be a difficult time of year) My kids are having a second hand christmas this year, it is really interesting all the little projects going on in the house. Take care and good luck.

[ZionWoman]

When my mom makes anonymous Christmas boxes, (usually for the older, single sisters) she outs in some lipgloss, hand cream, gloves (sometimes a scarf or touque -that's a winter hat for you yanks;)), some chocolates, hot chocolate, and a gift card to get groceries or go to a store they if they are just lonely and not destitute. Last year, she gave out a couple of gas cards (I don't know if they have them down there. It's like a gift of gas ).

[Iggy]

It has been brought to my attention that there are also those who are down at this time of year. I think it would be great to do a gift box for the families we won't be able to help for the Christmas needs. The gift boxes will include items that will feed the spirit this Christmas Season.

Some Soda

Prepackage Snacks

A CD

a scented candle

A Book (any Ideas?)

The box will be delivered, the door bell rung, and then we will flee.

What other things might be simple but safely enjoyed when you don't know who the giver is?

Berry,

For many years the Christmas season was a real downer for me - extremely depressing.

My sisters started sending me a care package the week after Thanksgiving.

It included: individual packages of flavored cocoa, herbal teas, seasonal mug, bubble bath, seasonal socks, fuzzy fun socks (for me I think socks with individual toes are fun socks), christmas music, individual wrapped christmas candies, miniture seasonal coloring books with small box of crayons (can get these at the Dollar Store), christmas pencils, pens and erasures. Basically, stocking stuffer items. If you are doing this for a family, be sure to include enough for each person.Or you can do up a popcorn, cocoa and movie basket for a family.

[pam]

When my mom makes anonymous Christmas boxes, (usually for the older, single sisters) she outs in some lipgloss, hand cream, gloves (sometimes a scarf or touque -that's a winter hat for you yanks;)), some chocolates, hot chocolate, and a gift card to get groceries or go to a store they if they are just lonely and not destitute. Last year, she gave out a couple of gas cards (I don't know if they have them down there. It's like a gift of gas ).

Yes we have them. Gas cards are awesome gifts!!!

[Wingnut]

Last year, she gave out a couple of gas cards (I don't know if they have them down there. It's like a gift of gas ).

I hope they don't stink...

[ZionWoman]

I hope they don't stink...

:lol::lol: