Empty Nest Syndrome

[akindheart]

Does anybody here have the "empty nest syndrome.. My youngest is still at home but he works a lot and is out with friends and participating in church activities and callings when he is not at work;.so i don't see him much. I just miss being a mother Anyone else feel this way?

[NeuroTypical]

I think my wife is getting a head start on the syndrome. Our oldest is 7, but she still frets herself into a state when she thinks of our empty house.

[BenRaines]

My wife and I loved the time we were empty nesters. I say were because our two missionaries came home. One has married the other is still in school and our son in law lost his job so we now have an adult daughter living with us plus another adult daughter, her husband and two grandbabies.

Some day we will be empty nesters again and look forward to it. We loved being able to eat what we wanted, go where we wanted and not be reportable to anyone.

It is rather funny when the kids say "You didn't tell us you were going there" Wait I am the parent. You tell me where you are going not the other way around.

Ben Raines

[Guest Alana]

My wife and I loved the time we were empty nesters. I say were because our two missionaries came home. One has married the other is still in school and our son in law lost his job so we now have an adult daughter living with us plus another adult daughter, her husband and two grandbabies.

Some day we will be empty nesters again and look forward to it. We loved being able to eat what we wanted, go where we wanted and not be reportable to anyone.

It is rather funny when the kids say "You didn't tell us you were going there" Wait I am the parent. You tell me where you are going not the other way around.

Ben Raines

how is it working having a married daughter and her family in the house? Just curious because I've gone that route (being the in law child) and was 'reminiscing.' How do you think it works out for you son in law?

[BenRaines]

They have just been with us for two weeks. Probably will be with us for two months. He lost his job so they moved from Las Vegas to where we live and are looking for work. Going well so far. Son in law's father died when he was young so I am truly a father figure for him. Love having my granddaughters so close.

Ben Raines

[applepansy]

My wife and I loved the time we were empty nesters. I say were because our two missionaries came home. One has married the other is still in school and our son in law lost his job so we now have an adult daughter living with us plus another adult daughter, her husband and two grandbabies.

Some day we will be empty nesters again and look forward to it. We loved being able to eat what we wanted, go where we wanted and not be reportable to anyone.

It is rather funny when the kids say "You didn't tell us you were going there" Wait I am the parent. You tell me where you are going not the other way around.

Ben Raines

I agree Ben!!! I'll be so happy when mmy 24yo moves out again. I loved "dating my boyfriend" again.

Ok. . .before someone misunderstands. . .boyfriend = hubby.

applepansy

[applepansy]

akindheart,

I'm sorry. I've always wanted to skip the Mom years and go straight to Grandma. I loved being a mom but I watched how much fun my mom and MIL had with my kids and I wanted that too.

As my children have gotten older and become adults. I'm really ready for them to be independant. In my situation I need them to be independant. That doesn't mean I don't expect them to check in regularly. My adult children who don't live at home are under strict instructions to call home at least once a week. If it goes two weeks, then I call them. Sometimes I don't call when its convenient. LOL

Oh the joys of parenting,

applepansy

[akindheart]

You know I'm starting to think that maybe i'm just bored and that i don't have the Empty Nest Syndrome, because the more i post on this website the happier i feel. .

[applepansy]

You know I'm starting to think that maybe i'm just bored and that i don't have the Empty Nest Syndrome, because the more i post on this website the happier i feel. .

You make a good point. Mom's get so used to taking care of somebody that when there is nobody to take care of they don't know what to do with themselves. I think that this is why so many women feel "empty nest syndrome."

For me having my children gone was liberating. I had time to focus on the things I loved to do again.

applepansy

[Elgama]

I know mine are only 5 and 2 and not quite here yet lol - but I am so with Applepansy

I remember reading in CS Lewis think it was his book the Four Loves, that true love as a parent is raising them until they no longer need us, and thats what I see my role as Mother as, my goal is really for them to leave home as fully fledged adults. Plus I am so looking forward to the time with hubby.

I guess I had/am having my kids so I can raise em, but I also know I am odd my children have been allowed a lot more freedom to 'grow' up than most of their peers, I seem to be alone at the playground sitting there watching instead of being constantly involved if they want me they ask.

Does it make me weird that I had kids so I could be an empty nester?

-Charley

[akindheart]

I

Does it make me weird that I had kids so I could be an empty nester?

-Charley

I don't think that's weird. That was also my goal as well. There were days i couldn't wait for my boys to grow up and move out.. My husband works long hours though and i work in my home answering phones for him. I realty do think i am just bored. Maybe I should do some volunteer work or something.. I really do like being here with all of you though.

[Hemidakota]

Does anybody here have the "empty nest syndrome.. My youngest is still at home but he works a lot and is out with friends and participating in church activities and callings when he is not at work;.so i don't see him much. I just miss being a mother Anyone else feel this way?

No but lucky you....

[applepansy]

Does it make me weird that I had kids so I could be an empty nester?

-Charley

NOPE, not in my book. :) My oldest was born in 1978....... I've been wanting to be an empty nester and a GRANDMA ever since. I think I talked about this in another thread somewhere.

My wannabe-adult children are not cooperating. I should have at least 4 grandchildren by now.

[BenRaines]

We have three granddaughters and it is the coolest thing in the world. Papa please read with me, Papa please do a project with me. I love it.

Ben Raines

[applepansy]

Maybe I should do some volunteer work or something.. I really do like being here with all of you though.

I just spent the last several months volunteering at the temple one day a week. It was wonderful. Four hours at the temple every week. There were times when I was extremely busy but there were also times when I had time to sit and read the scriptures.

Anyway. . . I was providing a service and in a very forgiving/loving environment. Which is what I needed for my foggy brain. I used the work as my version of Occupational Therapy. I have been continually blessed by the experience.

Now I'm just on call. I'll only go in when someone calls in sick or something comes up. I'm really going to miss it. I'm looking forward to finding another way to be there for four hours once a week.

There are other ways to volunteer. Rocking drug addicted babies is a wonderful program at our local hospitals. The nurses don't always have the time so substitute Grandma's volunteer.

Oh. . .another thing I've been doing is Genealogy. What a wonderful time to get started. The kids are grown and gone and besides being online searching census records I can take frequent breaks to read and post here.

There are so many ways to fill your "empty" time. Just be creative.

applepansy

[applepansy]

We have three granddaughters and it is the coolest thing in the world. Papa please read with me, Papa please do a project with me. I love it.

Ben Raines

ROFL Ok, Ben. . .now you're just bragging.

applepansy

[Palerider]

We are going through that empty nest stuff here. Our oldest 2 daughters are married and our son is at home and he is a full time college student and will be transfering to Southeast Missouri State next school year and gone alot and working. Our youngest daughter will be 20yrs old tomorrow and she is a full time college student and works and gone alot.

Our 2 grandaughters live close by and we get to see them alot....its great:):)

[pam]

This year I will start the first of the emptying the nest. I have a son joining the military and reports for boot camp in August. My 19 year old daughter celebrated her "one year anniversary" with her boyfriend..I think they will marry eventually. Then one more at home who I will probably NEVER get rid of.

Edited January 8, 2009 by pam

[boyzmom]

My oldest son just returned from his mission less than two months ago and he is on the verge of getting engaged. I am about to freak out. She is a righteous wonderful young lady and they will go to the temple; so why am I so upset!? This is what I raised him to do. Nevertheless, I feel like I could panic at the thought of him leaving me for good. Lots of fasting and prayer are on the horizon for me.

--Leanne

[Irishcolleen]

I had one child move away for work and one leave for college this summer. I still have one at home but I miss my other two so bad! It is getting easier as I see how much they are enjoying and succeeding in their new lives. I'm taking this time to explore and experience things I put off during my child-rearing years.