Gatsby

Do LDS ever talk about sex?

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I don't mean to disrespect anyone but I'm curious to know if singles, those who are over 18 and married members ever talk about sex? Or do those kind of topics offend some of you? Do they offend the spirt?

The reason I ask is because I have friends who are in their 20's, single and they're not LDS and they talk about sex all the time. Sometimes it gets a little inappropriate but not always.

I never heard or had a discussion about sex with any members expect with a really close friend who I see as a father figure.

Is there a reason why members don't talk about sex? Is it a topic mostly discussed by married couples?

I've been wondering for some time and haven't had the guts to post this on here and I do apologize if I misplaced this thread in the wrong section.

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Most active LDS 20-something singles don't have any experience with sex, so they don't really talk about it. LDS also view sex as a very sacred thing, so it's not typically a common topic of conversation, except perhaps between close friends.

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all those topics are in the "open forum" you can ask pam for access if ya wanna, as long as your over 18 anyway. I just asked for access tonight, and some posts have been an education about doctrin i would never feel comfortable asking my best lds friend.

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Do LDS ever talk about sex?

Shhhh! We don't use that word around here. You should instead use one of the following code words (preferably surrounded in quotes)

relations

maritals

doing it

special time

special nap

you know what

that activity which must not be named

Use one of these terms and we'll engage in conversations, albeit very cryptically, lest anyone think we've done anything related to "you know what." But if you use the "s"-word, we'll look at you blankly and/or incredulously and pretend we don't know what you're talking about.

And now I think I've got my tongue planted so firmly in my cheek that they've fused together. A little help please?

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Of course they do. But as Wingy said many feel the topic can easily get out of hand and so avoid the topic altogether.

I've had discussions about sex with my male and female LDS friends, married and single. I do not believe there is anything inherently wrong about the subject, but there can be something wrong about how we handle the topic. One can be respectful and attentive to the Spirit while discussing the subject. But, at least for me, it is apparent if/when the talk turns into inappropriate matters or provokes feelings that should be mastered.

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something else to keep in mind.... the topic in general is sacred, the intimate details even more so and each should be treated with proper respect. i know it can be very common in the world to discuss personal details of specific events. i think you will find most lds take the stance of talking about things in general can be acceptable but you will rarely hear the details and specifics.

moe, did i do ok keeping the "s" word out?

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I'm now wondering: Gatsby, what do you need to know? Come on, you can ask me. Just start off:

Dear Beef,

I was thinking about something and need your help. I want to know ________

Fill in the blank and I'll impart of my wisdom.

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-------Post deleted until everyone gets a chance to go see the funny Beefche made on the previous page-----------

Edited by Honor
All hail the scantily clad cow!

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Ok, that's long enough...

There are a few subjects in the church like this that I wish were talked about more often, but then again, I don't. I'm still trying to think of how to find the balance. Being a young and relatively naive little Mormon couple when we got married caused quite a few problems and ultimately contributed to the end of our marriage (although a lot of that had to do with a partner who didn't want to work on anything about himself), but that doesn't necessarily make the opposite approach better. There has got to be a way to separate casual and inappropriate sexual conversations from worth while advice, questions and knowledge that could benefit a marriage greatly.

Sex seems to be the hushed topic that so many couples have problems with but so few (in the church) actually address in an environment where they could find help. Maybe there's not so much a problem with the lack of casual conversations about sex, but more a problem with couples knowing the appropriate places to turn for help when problems arise in a relationship.

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IMO, it is imperative for singles to discuss the topic. I see all around me heartache and problems caused by disparate desire and willingness to engage in intimacy in marriage.

It's hard to discuss when so inexperienced, and really, both individuals don't know if, when the honeymoon phase settles down, if they will want to be together daily, 3x per week, 1x per week, 1x per month, or even less. Everyone is different. Disparate drive can be a relationship killer, and if it can be avoided, it should be.

And yes, it is talked about a lot in marriage. Usually it is fought about some too!

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I used to talk about it at one time. Having been divorced now for over 10 years...my question is now...what is sex?

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I used to talk about it at one time. Having been divorced now for over 10 years...my question is now...what is sex?

Pam, strangely enough, I know what you mean. With my wife's condition, this is an impossibility for me as well.

Try being single your whole life.....isn't sex a bad word?

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I'm really trying to keep this thread clean and you say this? It's hard typing while biting my tongue......

Fighting the urge to lick the screen? Or having a hard time suppressing your darker side?

And to think, MOE was probably sitting there wondering if he'd get in trouble. Way to take the fall Av!

Taking bets to see how long it takes until we moving to the open forum.....

Edited by Honor

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Fighting the urge to lick the screen? Or having a hard time suppressing your darker side?

And to think, MOE was probably sitting there wondering if he'd get in trouble. Way to take the fall Av!

Taking bets to see how long it takes until we moving to the open forum.....

I'm surprised MOE's post didn't do it.

(another bad pun)

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IMO, it is imperative for singles to discuss the topic. I see all around me heartache and problems caused by disparate desire and willingness to engage in intimacy in marriage.

It's hard to discuss when so inexperienced, and really, both individuals don't know if, when the honeymoon phase settles down, if they will want to be together daily, 3x per week, 1x per week, 1x per month, or even less. Everyone is different. Disparate drive can be a relationship killer, and if it can be avoided, it should be.

I talked about it with my husband after we got engaged, in a respectful and appropriate manner; just discussing expectations and the like. I don't see anything wrong with that.

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