Question about dating


EQ_Guy
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This question is aimed at women primarily. Have you ever been interested in someone in your ward and if you ever dated this person, how did you get them to ask you out? There's a cute girl in my ward that I'm interested in knowing a bit more, but it's just hard to know if she'd be interested or not in getting together with me. I see these dating articles from match.com or Yahoo dating or something and they advice women to hold a glance on a guy for a few seconds or something, but this girl doesn't really do any of that.

Everyone knows she's a super-quiet person, so it's just her nature I guess to know be too "out there." I've talked with her a few times and yesterday she actually said "hi" to me as we were walking past each other in the hall. I was very shocked. I'm the sole single guy in my ward's EQ Presidency and for whatever reason that makes me feel weird when I think of trying to get together with a single woman in my ward.

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This question is aimed at women primarily. Have you ever been interested in someone in your ward and if you ever dated this person, how did you get them to ask you out? There's a cute girl in my ward that I'm interested in knowing a bit more, but it's just hard to know if she'd be interested or not in getting together with me. I see these dating articles from match.com or Yahoo dating or something and they advice women to hold a glance on a guy for a few seconds or something, but this girl doesn't really do any of that.

Everyone knows she's a super-quiet person, so it's just her nature I guess to know be too "out there." I've talked with her a few times and yesterday she actually said "hi" to me as we were walking past each other in the hall. I was very shocked. I'm the sole single guy in my ward's EQ Presidency and for whatever reason that makes me feel weird when I think of trying to get together with a single woman in my ward.

I have been married for many years but one thing I remember from my dating that I do not think has changed – Shy guys seldom meet and go out with sharp girls.

The Traveler

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I have been married for many years but one thing I remember from my dating that I do not think has changed – Shy guys seldom meet and go out with sharp girls.

The Traveler

I'm not sure if that's a term for something, but what is your definiton of a "sharp girl?"

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This girl might be considered on the dull-side by soon, but I do think she's cute. Her favorite activities are reading - Anna of Green Gables, Twilight series, sewing and baking. :o

So she will look good reading her books and baking? Seriously though, my grandparents seemed perfectly content to sit together in the same room reading... that's not exactly my thing right now, but hey, to each their own. Don't let others tell you what is or is not exciting, or how you should or should not feel about her. As someone else said- just go ask her. The fact that she's shy, yet still talked to you should probably tell you something.

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I'm not sure. This girl might be considered on the dull-side by soon, but I do think she's cute. Her favorite activities are reading - Anna of Green Gables, Twilight series, sewing and baking. :o

A word of advice, though. If you want to get her to talk about her interests, you should know that it's Anne of Green Gables, not Anna.

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Sounds like you just lack the confidence to ask her out. So you gotta get confidence. That should come with some Kung Fu training. But you need money to take the courses, so you should get a job at a local diner. Oh, and practice conversating with anyone who drives a VW bug. Topics like the weather in California is welcome. And don't forget to compliment her on being thorough.

There's an instructional movie called The Phone Call that you can watch for further guidance.

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This is how it works.

Go to the girl and ask the following questions:

1.) Are you single?

If yes then ask,

2.) Are you straight?

If yes, then ask,

3.) Are you out of debt?

If still yes, then

4.) Are you interested in going out with me?

Done.

The first No answer, walk away, and hit the next girl...

(courtesy of Lisa Kudrow in P.S. I love you)

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So she will look good reading her books and baking? Seriously though, my grandparents seemed perfectly content to sit together in the same room reading... that's not exactly my thing right now, but hey, to each their own. Don't let others tell you what is or is not exciting, or how you should or should not feel about her. As someone else said- just go ask her. The fact that she's shy, yet still talked to you should probably tell you something.

What should her talking with me tell me? :) I mean, I think a lot of people are just polite at church when they talk with you at church sometimes, but in reality may not want to. I just find it hard to read single girls at church.

Don't worry, I'm not swayed by what others think as far as boring or not boring. I'm somewhat of a risk-taker - skydiving, etc., so I've just wondered if a lot of things I like would just not interest her at ALL.

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A word of advice, though. If you want to get her to talk about her interests, you should know that it's Anne of Green Gables, not Anna.

Hmm, thanks for the advice. I looked it up weeks ago when I first found out she loved that book, etc. I just got it wrong during this post.

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Sounds like you just lack the confidence to ask her out. So you gotta get confidence. That should come with some Kung Fu training. But you need money to take the courses, so you should get a job at a local diner. Oh, and practice conversating with anyone who drives a VW bug. Topics like the weather in California is welcome. And don't forget to compliment her on being thorough.

There's an instructional movie called The Phone Call that you can watch for further guidance.

Sorry, I don't get the "thorough" part at all. My confidence is "ok." I didn't want to mention this part because I know a lot of people are narrow-minded, but we're of different races and I have no idea if she's open-minded as far as that goes.

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I'm not sure. This girl might be considered on the dull-side by soon, but I do think she's cute. Her favorite activities are reading - Anna of Green Gables, Twilight series, sewing and baking. :o

Doesn't matter whether she is sharp or not, if you want to go out with her then just call her and ask her out.

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You're so lucky...

Besides- you have an "in" now! Have her explain it to you!

Come on, tell me about this "team" thing? :) I've known for awhile that she was into Anne... Gables, but I sincerely had noooo interest in even fakin' enthusiasm, but I can deal with "Twilight." I just very recently found out about her Twilight thing.

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What team... Twilight? What does that mean. I don't know much at all about the whole Twilight thing.

The protagonist of the series, Bella, is torn between two suitors, Edward and Jacob. So fans are either on Team Edward or Team Jacob.

(I've not read the books at all.)

You asked earlier what talking with her is supposed to tell you about her interest level. The answer is that it will be vague. She may give subtle clues, you may miss them. She may not give any, you may think she's giving some. I still hold to my first comment. The easiest way to find out if she's interested in you is just to ask her out. It doesn't have to be a full-on date at first. Maybe she'd like to go for an afternoon walk one Sunday. Maybe try lunch or a Saturday breakfast get-together. Something low-pressure and casual is a good way to start out.

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I have heard that women like men who are different. Show her you are unique. Don't pretend to be interested in Twighlight. If you like vampire movies then just mention you understand why she would like it. If she is quiet, she probably admires outgoingness. Show her you are not timid. Ask her out and see what happens. And remember to be more like Charlie and not like Alen in how you act/speak to her. ;)

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