Marriage Class

[MorningStar]

We were visiting my brother's ward yesterday and as we attempted to attend Gospel Doctrine in the Relief Society Room, the teacher waved us in. Mr. MorningStar and I thought, "Wow. This is a small Gospel Doctrine class." Turns out it's so large, it's actually in the chapel. We slowly realized, "This is the marriage class!" YES! I love marriage classes!

So this sister was giving lots of different advice and commented that we get married and then spend years trying to change each other when we should just be getting used to each other. I leaned over to my husband and said, "See? You just have to get used to hitting your head on the cupboard doors when I leave them open."

[Guest]

Someday he'll just learn to duck and he won't even think about it.

We start teaching the marriage and family class in 2 weeks. I'm getting kind of nervous!

[MorningStar]

Oh, I can't wait to hear about it! So we got on the subject of husbands not just seeing what needs to be done and helping and she said, "My husband told me that he just can't see." I said, "Whatever the reason is, they're not mind readers, so we can either complain and act like martyrs about all the stuff they're not doing or we can ask." For me, I hate asking for help repeatedly because I start to hate the sound of my own voice and feel like a nag, so I probably do a lot more on my own than I should.

My boys will look around the room and say, "It's clean!" I'm thinking, "Are you kidding me?" Or they pile and pile stuff on top of the garbage can until it's falling off and they're having a freak about it. "WHY WON'T IT STAY IN THE GARBAGE CAN?!" "Because it's full and it needs to be removed." So they go to pull it out and more stuff is falling everywhere.

I know plenty of men who see what needs to be done just fine, so I think it's a personality thing rather than men vs. women.

[estradling75]

I know plenty of men who see what needs to be done just fine, so I think it's a personality thing rather than men vs. women.

No... just some men just have better training

[Guest]

My boys will look around the room and say, "It's clean!" I'm thinking, "Are you kidding me?" Or they pile and pile stuff on top of the garbage can until it's falling off and they're having a freak about it. "WHY WON'T IT STAY IN THE GARBAGE CAN?!" "Because it's full and it needs to be removed." So they go to pull it out and more stuff is falling everywhere.

.

My daughters do the same thing. :)

[MorningStar]

My daughter is 4 and recognizes when the garbage needs to be taken out, but I think she takes after my mom's side of the family. She enjoys cleaning. I love cooking, so we're going to make a great team.

[Wingnut]

So this sister was giving lots of different advice and commented that we get married and then spend years trying to change each other when we should just be getting used to each other. I leaned over to my husband and said, "See? You just have to get used to hitting your head on the cupboard doors when I leave them open."

I'm short, and my husband is tall. In our first apartment, he would leave the cupboard doors open in the kitchen a lot, and it bugged me, because I kept hitting my head on the corners, which was painful. I talked to him about it, and it only took one or two reminders, and in six years it hasn't been a problem again! In the last few months, he's started leaving other doors open: the linen closet in the bathroom, his closet door, the coat closet by the front door (we use our side or back doors for in/out). It's annoying because it makes things look more cluttered, but it's not something that's been worth arguing about. He said something recently that started a conversation where it was appropriate to bring it up, so I did, but I also added that it was a battle I didn't care enough about fighting. He's been trying a little more since then. :) Honestly, though, it's hard to add to the clutter, because I really crappy housekeeper.

Or they pile and pile stuff on top of the garbage can until it's falling off and they're having a freak about it. "WHY WON'T IT STAY IN THE GARBAGE CAN?!" "Because it's full and it needs to be removed." So they go to pull it out and more stuff is falling everywhere.

LOL!!!

[MorningStar]

My husband's reminder to close the cupboard doors is, "You're trying to kill me."

My mom got so annoyed my dad kept leaving the medicine cabinet door open, she finally took the door off!

[Bini]

I would attend a Marriage Class, not because my husband needs them, rather I probably could take a few suggestions in letting go and not being so tightly wound.

[beefche]

Honestly, though, it's hard to add to the clutter, because I really crappy housekeeper.

LOL!!!

Oh my gosh--are we married to the same man? And are we the same person? I'm a crappy housekeeper as well. But, I find excuses such as I work full time and alot of overtime....that counts, right?

Dravin leaves the cupboard doors open all the time and usually the kitchen drawers. I still tease him that I married a poltergeist.

[Guest]

I would attend a Marriage Class, not because my husband needs them, rather I probably could take a few suggestions in letting go and not being so tightly wound.

The class is mostly by invitation, but not invitation-only. They've asked us to recommend people to "call" to take the class, and we're asking for a few couples from families that really seem to work, because we're hoping for a mix of people who not only "need" it, but who will have valuable input and advice based on what's working for them.

[missionary0204]

This thread scares me! I am a married man and the first man at that to post. Ever heard of the fiery darts? At least I am good at dodgeball (consider my comments with humor and take them litely).

I would love a class like this at church. Sharing ideas with other married couples for the most part helps each other to grow and analyze issues and habits within their relationship.

[estradling75]

I am a married man and the first man at that to post.

Excuse me?!?! My wife and mother would be much disappointed to find out I am not a man?

[Vort]

I'm short, and my husband is tall. In our first apartment, he would leave the cupboard doors open in the kitchen a lot, and it bugged me, because I kept hitting my head on the corners, which was painful.

Role reversal with us. After 25 years, Sister Vort still sometimes leaves the cupboard doors open over the refrigerator, and I find myself dodging incoming bogies when I walk into the kitchen.

[Dravin]

Oh my gosh--are we married to the same man? And are we the same person? I'm a crappy housekeeper as well. But, I find excuses such as I work full time and alot of overtime....that counts, right?

Dravin leaves the cupboard doors open all the time and usually the kitchen drawers. I still tease him that I married a poltergeist.

You can't be, I still leave the cabinet doors open.

[Wingnut]

Oh my gosh--are we married to the same man? And are we the same person? I'm a crappy housekeeper as well. But, I find excuses such as I work full time and alot of overtime....that counts, right?

Dravin leaves the cupboard doors open all the time and usually the kitchen drawers. I still tease him that I married a poltergeist.

Our husbands are an awful lot alike.

[Traveler]

I really do not know why anyone thinks a class is the way to improve a marriage. All anyone needs to do is sit down and have a frank discussion with their mother-in-law to learn everything (and more) necessary to improve any marriage.

The Traveler

[Guest]

I really do not know why anyone thinks a class is the way to improve a marriage. All anyone needs to do is sit down and have a frank discussion with their mother-in-law to learn everything (and more) necessary to improve any marriage.

The Traveler

Wow, I didn't even think of that! My MIL told me on Friday how to be a good mother (see, if I would just tell my twins not to touch things that aren't for toddlers, they wouldn't get into stuff they shouldn't. I don't know why that never occurred to me! And if I would stand over them all the time, they wouldn't make messes. Nevermind that there are two of them and they're sometimes in different places, or that at some point during the day I have to wash dishes and switch laundry and all that good stuff. . .) So why am I studying the lessons? Of COURSE she knows! I should just have her come tell the class.

[Wordnerd]

We took an awesome marriage and family class last year, the couple that taught would alternate lessons, she always had handouts, tablecloth, photos, and art. He didn't so much:D

Although he did do an awesome object lesson on sealing that involved two plumbing connectors, solder and a torch!

[MorningStar]

Is there a dealing with in-laws class?

[Bini]

The class is mostly by invitation, but not invitation-only. They've asked us to recommend people to "call" to take the class, and we're asking for a few couples from families that really seem to work, because we're hoping for a mix of people who not only "need" it, but who will have valuable input and advice based on what's working for them.

What generally qualifies a couple in attending a Marriage Class? Is it for any couples that want suggestions on enriching a marriage? Or for dysfunctional couples? If it is the latter, how is this information revealed to teachers (as I assume any problems between couples taken to the bishop are in confidence)?

I think attending one might be a pleasant experience, too. Especially, if the group consists of overall happy couples that are there just to enrich their marriage.

[Guest]

I asked the bishopric and they said anyone who wants to can attend, but they also invite certain people to do so. I don't think it's just people who seem to "need" the extra help, I think they just want to make sure everyone takes it at one time or another.

[Guest]

Is there a dealing with in-laws class?

If there is, I've already failed it.

[Wingnut]

Can we get this thread moved to a forum that has a laugh button? It's very much needed.