Thinking of converting - new here

[Momto5]

Hello everyone! Just joined lds.net today. My husband and I are thinking very seriously about converting and I thought I'd just take a look at what everyone is saying around here.

Yesterday we requested a visit from the missionaries. Haven't heard back yet and are looking forward to their call. We also chatted with some missionaries online yesterday, which was pretty cool.

We have a bunch of questions that we're looking forward to talking about. But we do know a lot about the basic beliefs because we've had so many LDS friends over the years that were gracious and helpful in answering our nosiness. What I find aggravating is that I'm trying to find answers from Mormons online, but I mostly find stuff from ex-Mormons or mainline denominations trying to put the church down.

Mostly I'd like to get started getting to know some people. We live very rurally, so even when we are a part of a church, I'm sure it will be very small.

Happy to meet you and thanks for reading!

[estradling75]

Welcome to LDS.net Momto5...

This is not an official site of the LDS church. But are very much pro LDS. One of the main goals of this site is to put positive LDS content on the web. That being said we do have a wide variety of different faiths here and we work to be respect of all of them.

So feel free to jump on into any existing threads or start your own with some of your questions.

[pam]

Welcome to the site. We look forward to your questions and comments.

[bytebear]

This is I believe the best resource for learning the basics (outside of the scriptures).

Gospel PrinciplesÂ*

lds.org has a ton of excellent resources in addition to that, but this manual is for new members and investigators. You can ask the missionaries if they can get you a hard copy if you want as well.

[SpiritDragon]

Welcome! I hope you enjoy visiting among us and find satisfactory answers to your inquiries.

[tovarisch]

Welcome. My fiancee and I are in the same boat. We can learn together!

[Momto5]

Update: We had expected the missionaries to call first, but at about 8:30 last night they surprised us. Had a wonderful visit with them and they answered a lot of questions. So nice that they want to spend their time talking about THEIR faith, rather than putting down others. That is part of what we were looking for.

Thank you everyone for the welcome! We are now busy reading the literature they gave us.

[tovarisch]

I went to the local library and found several good books.

-Understanding the Book of Mormon by Grant Hardy

-Book of Mormon: A Very Short Introduction by Terryl Givens

-Latter days: a guided tour through six billion years of Mormonism by Coke Newell

All three are written by orthodox, believing Latter-day Saints. Only the last speaks about doctrine and history in depth (in a very readable fashion), but the first two help further explain the Book of Mormon. I just began Givens's By the Hand of Mormon, but I am only 70 pages into it. So far it's explained the situation around Joseph Smith's translation, but looking at later chapters it will get into other topics.

Grant Hardy updated the formatting of the Book of Mormon into paragraphs, stanzas, etc. depending on prose, poetry, etc. in his book The Book of Mormon: A Reader's Edition. After I finish the BoM (I'm in Ether right now), I'm going to reread the book in Grant's layout.

Enjoy reading!

[Momto5]

It would be so nice to have more to read! Our local library has a lot of mainline Christian books, but pretty much nothing else. It's been a while, though, so I should check. Maybe I could find the books you suggested on Amazon.

tovarisch, how did you come to this point in considering conversion?

It's a little sticky for us. For instance, my mom HATES Mormons, though I don't know why, they've never done anything to her but be nice. But she was here when the missionaries stopped by and she's freaking out. Also, we'd most likely lose most of our friends because they'd consider us "lost." So we're not taking this lightly.

We just can relate to the testimony of Joseph Smith in what he said about looking at all the different churches and thinking that surely God had another, better way. I also find it hard to go along with churches that can't manage to get their own children and young people to attend. I know the LDS church has imperfect people like any other, but we're just getting a lot more answers there than we are from other places.

[tovarisch]

I'm 32, but I first met with Mormon missionaries when I was 19. I spent most of my 20s being anti-religion, but there was always a little, tiny point inside me that said, "You know you want to believe." During that period, I was always kind of interested. For example, I wanted and greatly enjoyed the PBS Frontline special on the Church. Anyhow, once my fiancee and I became serious and started discussing family, we both said that we wanted to raise our children in a community and with family. Obviously they will be our kids, but being involved in a community is important to both of us. We discussed going to church (I would refer to myself as "a nonbeliever who wants to be believe"), but I wasn't interested in Southern Baptist or Eastern Orthodox (the two faiths I know) or her faith (Episcopalian). I mentioned one day that we should consider LDS because it is so heavy on community, and she agreed. I emailed missionaries through the online form, and a couple weeks later two appeared. Have been going to church since.

We're pretty sure we want to join, but we are worried about our families and changing our lives to live by the Word of Wisdom. The proper answer to that is, "God will provide." I also worry that maybe we're reaching for the first great church to come our way, but that's why we're going to take five full weeks for the remaining five lessons and then make ourselves wait a little longer after that to be baptized. No harm is making the process last five months.

What prompted your visit to the church?

If you have an Android, iPhone, or iPad, there's a great app called "Gospel Library" by LDS that has everything: scriptures, training manuals, study guides (I like the "Book of Mormon: Student Manual"), etc. I highly recommend you download if you can. Also, there may be a Ward Library where you can find some great books.

[Magen_Avot]

Welcome, indeed.

I may be making an assumption but, why not do a read of the Book of Mormon and get the basic story of it down and know whats in it for yourself. Write down your questions and put the missionaries to work when they come over? Just a thought.

After all, you can spend years in books that "talk" about it.

Blessings

[tovarisch]

I highly recommend reading the Book of Mormon. It's why I've only a bit more of Ether and Moroni, which I should finish in the next couple days.

I recommend books and the app because there's a great deal to the Church than just its scriptures: history, culture, etc. To my mind, it's made the Book of Mormon more understandable.

Plus I love to read so there's that. :)

[bytebear]

DeseretBook.com - Books, DVDs, Music, Art & more for LDS Families

More than enough for your reading pleasure. If you are in the Western US, you might have a local store as well.

There are also a lot of books (mostly older ones) online for free. And of course lds.org has a ton of reading material.

[Momto5]

We'll actually be visiting for the first time tomorrow morning.

I think we too will take it slow, since we already have kids, don't want to rush it. They have a lot to do with us looking for a place to fit. There have been a lot of questions running through our minds and a lot of it has to do with the death of our son. We have had some really strange feedback scripturally from many groups, much uninvited I might add. Everyone seems to have a reason for why your baby dies. My favorite is that it was God's judgment for us being remarried.

We seriously studied and just don't see how it would be God's will for us to separate or divorce in God's name. We also didn't like the idea that an innocent child would be sent to hell, as many churches believe, if you were not part of their church. I guess it's circumstances such as ours that bring out the tougher doctrines that different churches believe.

So it's been through much prayer and heartache that we have become open to the LDS church. We'll see what happens tomorrow.

I am also 32. It's wonderful that you and your fiancee are getting this settled before you marry. :)

[tovarisch]

I'm so sorry to read about your son. I don't have any feedback for you other than that's tragic. I actually finished reading the Book of Mormon last night, and there is a chapter on infant baptism or, rather, the lack of need of infant baptism, in the Book of Moroni ch. 8.

Enjoy church this morning. The first Sunday of each month is always the most interesting (in my view).

[Chosenfrozen]

I know what Momto5 and Tovarich mean about worrying you might lose some friends. I was a bit worried myself when I converted. I was 21 (all those years ago) and my mom was very anti-Mormon at first. But after the Missionaries had come over a couple times for lessons and I'd asked them to sit down for dinner with us, she realized they were just regular guys like most of the ones I went to school with. A lot of people don't know much about Mormons, or what they think they know is mistaken, so they worry about you getting caught up in something strange. But we're pretty normal.

Most of my friends and coworkers aren't members, and we still go out on the weekends or have BBQs and bonfires or go to a sportsbar and watch the game. They know I don't drink and they're all okay with that. Don't worry too much about having to find a whole new circle of friends. Everyone does at first, but most of the time their worries were groundless. Your friends still love to hang out and laugh with you even when you're sober. (You can always tell them they're not losing a buddy, they're gaining a designated driver.)

[Momto5]

Thank you Tovarisch and ChosenFrozen for your encouragement. Sorry I disappeared on you.

I was just so shocked at my husband's response to church I didn't know what to say. He is totally freaked out that they use water for communion. I don't really care, I agree with the missionaries that it is the remembrance that is important, not the water or wine or juice.

Things were going really well until he went to the men's meeting. He seems to feel pressured and not ready to be a part of a priesthood and resisting the whole process because of it.

I'm now at a loss and don't know what to do. He started us on this whole journey and is now baling when I was ready to move forward. I'm scared of dividing the family. Ugh.

We met with the missionaries again today and he argued with them a little bit, but not as badly as last time. He invited them back, but he's being kind of grumpy about it. We'll see what happens.

[yjacket]

There have been a lot of questions running through our minds and a lot of it has to do with the death of our son. We have had some really strange feedback scripturally from many groups, much uninvited I might add. Everyone seems to have a reason for why your baby dies. My favorite is that it was God's judgment for us being remarried.

My sincere condolences.

Last night I had the most horrible dream. I have three kids and in this dream I saw my oldest get struck by a car. It was quite graphic and an extremely disturbing dream and I pretty much woke up immediately. Thankfully it was only a dream, yet the entire day I have thought about how I would survive if it actually happened.

The thing that kept going through my head today was the Atonement of Jesus Christ. It would be the only thing that would help me. My life would be hell and I'm not quite sure I would survive but if I were to somehow miraculous survive it would be through His sacrifice. His selfless gift of sacrificing Himself so that all might live again, so that I would have the chance to see my kid again. That would be it. It would be the only way I wouldn't become a miserable wretch, because I would need to live my life the best I could so that I could see my child again. So that Christ's Atonement would wash away my sins so I could see my kid again and that His Atonement would allow my child to be resurrected and live again.

I'm very glad for the Atonement in my life, without it all would truly be lost . . .

[bytebear]

I hope the missionaries pointed to Doctrine and Covenants 27:2

2 For, behold, I say unto you, that it mattereth not what ye shall eat or what ye shall drink when ye partake of the sacrament, if it so be that ye do it with an eye single to my glory—remembering unto the Father my body which was laid down for you, and my blood which was shed for the remission of your sins.

The church did use wine/grape juice in the early 20th century, but switched to water mainly for convenience. It's easier to get from the tap and it doesn't stain clothes when it's spilled.

My recommendation, have your husband pray to God about his concerns. No better source for truth.

[Chosenfrozen]

Momto5, it can be a little dauntin going to preisthood sometimes. It's also fun, but you know men can be too serious for our own good sometimes. Maybe your husband is a bit worried about what kind of new responsabilities he'd be taking on as a preisthood holder. You might want to ask him if that's it. They might not have explained the idea of 'callings' correctly, or he might feel like he's not sure if he'd be good at it or know what to do. (We help new members to learn things a bit at a time, and Heavenly Father really does help you to accomplish new tasks if you ask him. The growth is at your own pace.)

I remember I had a good friend who had converted and then become less active when she learned she might be asked to give a talk in church. Public speaking is really tough for some people. Don't know what to tell you about using water instead of wine other than to pray and ask if it's okay?

If the promise we make when we take the sacrement is more important than the tools.

[Momto5]

Thank you yjacket. Yes, it is comforting. And a friend has encouraged me that he could still be sealed to us. Which makes my husband stepping back even more distressing.

Thank you also ByteBear and ChosenFrozen. At this point it just seems like he's making excuses. And the priesthood does seem to be the reason. Do the men read out loud in the meeting? If so, I'm almost certain that's he reason. My husband does not read well, at all. I only share this because nobody here knows me or him, I would not want to embarrass him since most people do not know this about him.

He has read the brochures and the Book of Mormon, but the missionaries don't understand. He can read something, but that doesn't always mean he's understanding it because he's focusing so much on the reading aspect. So they keep asking, asking, asking about what he's read and I picked up on that's when he really starts putting up excuses and things. And if that's what it's like in the priesthood, it will be very hard for him to go back.

In other places when it's become obvious they will expect him to read, he excuses himself to the bathroom. In another case we'd always sit so that when it was his turn, I'd just skip him and start reading. One church we went to assigned him a scripture to read in front of the church EVEN AFTER MY HUSBAND NICELY ASKED THE LEADER NEVER TO MAKE HIM DO THAT, we went one more week and we didn't go back. It's very embarrassing to my husband.

So I think he's latched onto this water for sacrament issue as a way to justify not going. He's stopped praying with me about the whole thing. Last night he says he doesn't want the missionaries back. Says they make him feel angry and that it must be from Satan. Well then how does it make sense that it makes me feel happy? And the kids?

[tovarisch]

I am my no means an expert here, but given that reading could be the root cause of this, it might make sense to speak with the ward mission leader or another member about the issue. I know that there were a couple things that I haven't felt comfortable discussing with missionaries so I spoke about them with someone my own age; in my case, it was the EQ first counselor, but that's partially because he and I are friends outside of church.

[Jane_Doe]

I too despise reading out loud, especially in public. In Relief Society, it's common for them to hand out readings to encourage class participation. Rather than taking a reading, I just pass them along and let someone else read it. I don't think that this has ever bothered anyone, and makes the meeting much more enjoyable for me.