Depression And Faith

[Rebecca2424]

So I have a question, I have have been diagnosed with depression for many, many years and now know why I feel so bad most days (now on some sort of new anti-depression drug and it helps so much) but how does one go about telling friends in church about something like this? I really need to find other members who suffer this, as my member friends seem not to, any ideas?

[Traveler]

So I have a question, I have have been diagnosed with depression for many, many years and now know why I feel so bad most days (now on some sort of new anti-depression drug and it helps so much) but how does one go about telling friends in church about something like this? I really need to find other members who suffer this, as my member friends seem not to, any ideas?

We all have trials in life. I would suggest that whenever possible you concentrate on helping someone else with their trials rather than trying to concern them with yours. I have a feeling that because of your experience you could be a great help to many.

The Traveler

[Alaskagain]

I have had a diagnosis of "clinical depression" for many years. It's great that you have found a medication that helps. In some cases, it takes a while to find the right prescription and the right dosage. It took years for me, and now I only take meds over the winter months, when it seems to get worse. (Seasonal Adjustment Disorder or maybe just Post-Christmas let down? :) )

. . . how does one go about telling friends in church about something like this? I really need to find other members who suffer this, as my member friends seem not to, any ideas?

It is nothing to be ashamed of; if you want to tell your friends, just tell them - maybe start with your visiting teacher or your closest friend? If you want to form a support group, just let a few people know - it may surprise you who else has the same diagnosis. One day in the church kitchen on activity night, I said, "Oh, I can't forget to stop at the pharmacy on the way home to pick up my prescription of xxxbrand name" and 3 (out of 8) other ladies turned around and said "That works really well."

One of the biggest problems I have is, sometimes I am unhappy about a particular situation, and then I blame it on depression instead of taking care of the problem. When I realize the problem is being compounded because of it, I just slap my forehead and go DUH, and get to work on it.

Another problem is, sometimes medication keeps me from feeling promptings of the HS, and on the other hand, sometimes depression does the same thing. I have to work at being sensitive and receptive.

I also work at being happy, and having positive influences around me, and staying close to the gospel. Compassionate service for others also helps a lot - there is nothing to buoy up my mental state as much as doing something nice or being helpful to another person.

I hope my comments have helped.

Good luck!

[AnthonyB]

Rebecca,

I'm not LDS but my wife suffers from depression. (It runs in her family.)

I think often people in churches (I don't think LDS are unlikely to be different) present their best sides at church and often don't feel comfortable with revealing their flaws. I would be very surprised if you didn't find people who struggle with depression in any group. However depression as a medical condition is often dismissed and people get sick of the pat exhortations "to put on the stiff upper lip" and so tend to hide it.

If you have a trusted leader, go to them and ask if they know someone with a similiar walk (testimony?). Even if there isn't someone that has depression in an ongoing way, maybe you can find someone who has had post natal depression (which is not that uncommon), who would at least know some of what your going through?

God bless.

[a-train]

Say 'Look, guys, I'm depressed. Cheer me up.'

My mom slept through her 30s. I would come home from school in the afternoon and she had not yet left the bed! She had been physically abused as a teen, the Relief Society President in her local ward saved her and took her in. She met a great guy at a Church dance, married him and all was looking good. A few years later some punks robbed and murdered her husband and left her a widow with three kids at age 25. She's been depressed her whole life....

...but not because of those circumstances. Her depression is based on low self-esteem and a sense of failure. It's a nasty cycle. She is depressed so she sleeps her life away. Then she wakes up and realizes she is wasting her life, that's depressing so she goes back to sleep. Happiness is always around the corner. The new job, the new car, the new relationship. It never gets any better. Why?

'Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.' (Matt. 6:34) She is NOT living today, but she only wants to get away from yesterday and hopes tomorrow will be better. With this distraction, she never makes today any good. So the past is always bad and the future is worrisome.

I'd like to say: 'Snap out of it!', 'Cheer up!' But she can't. The branches in her mind upon which rests her depression have not been pruned and the branches of happiness have not been nurtured. It takes time for this organism to grow properly. I used to be heading down that path until I realized this. I did so by reading the scriptures. Do I feel the Spirit of the LORD right now? Am I doing His will and making progress? If not, I am not nurturing happiness nor pruning out sorrow. It can be hard work, but neglecting it will ruin me.

Another issue here is defensiveness. If I said: 'Mom, you are depressed because you aren't living happily.' She would take offense. She would defend herself. She would say: 'This isn't my fault.' The trouble is, no one cares whose fault it is and no one is asking. If a doctor says: 'You are going to have to drink more water every day.' Answering 'I have never neglected drinking water!' would not satisfy the doctor or the problem. No one is mad at you, no one is accusing you. You just need more water.

This is how Satan gets us. He makes us defensive. He makes us resist the gifts of God so we shrivel like an unwatered branch. Christ is the life! He said: 'whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst; but the water that I shall give him shall be in him a well of water springing up into everlasting life.' (John 4:14)

Satan wants us to feel useless and to fear the reproval of the LORD. He wants us to never obtain the good fruit of happiness in the gifts of God. But 'despise not thou the chastening of the Lord, nor faint when thou art rebuked of him: For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not? But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons. Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live? For they verily for a few days chastened us after their own pleasure; but he for our profit, that we might be partakers of his holiness. Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.' (Heb 12:5-11)

-a-train

[Elphaba]

Another issue here is defensiveness. If I said: 'Mom, you are depressed because you aren't living happily.' She would take offense. She would defend herself. She would say: 'This isn't my fault.' The trouble is, no one cares whose fault it is and no one is asking.

Yes, you do fault her when you her tell the problem is "you aren't living happily."

Based on your description, your mother is acutely depressed. That must be a horrible thing for you to have to live with, especially when it goes on and on and on. And I have no doubt you're trying to help her when you tell her "you aren't living happily," but maybe you don't realize you could be adding to her sense of isolation rather than helping her.

She needs to be seen by a good psychiatrist on a regular basis. For all I know you and your mother have already tried that; if so, you need to try again and again and again until you finally find someone who can help her. Unfortunately, this is what it takes for many people, myself included to find someone who finally has the right answers.

I'm sure this has been extremely painful for you, and you have done the best you can by your mother. The fact that you were able to see depression coming at you and you took control of it before it did is truly impressive. Obviously you've succeeded in your life where others haven't, and you've done so on your own with your faith and belief in your Heavenly Father. I do not dismiss that at all.

I would just ask that you understand not everyone can do what you've been able to do. If your mom could have, she would have by now. I assure you, based on your description, her kind of depression is not alleviated by "living happily," and no, with this kind of depression, it's not her fault.

But that does not mean it's impossible. When I was scraping the bottom, I also had people telling me things like "You need to find your passion, etc. They just didn't understand how debilitating acute depression is and how their comments seemed, to me, as if they came from another world. I really couldn't comprehend what they were saying. But when I finally got the help I needed, I once more entered the real world and could finally understand what they meant by "finding your passion."

I'm sure you've tried very hard and I'm being presumptuous. I just know that when I was in an acute deprssion, and could not get out of bed and slept 24 hours a day because of it, I could not understand what people would say to me. I was also defensive because people would tell me what I needed to do, and I knew there was absolutely no way I could do what the told me, yet they would never believe me.

I suspect it's the same with your mother, based on what you've said here. And unless she gets professional, medical help to get her out of the grips of the acute depression, she might not ever be able to really hear you. It's a symptom of the disease of depression.

I wish you good luck with your mother.

Elphaba

[Gabelma]

I have/had Post Natel Depression following the birth of my son it can be debilitating. Any illness can become a blessing but it takes time to learn to live with it, don't expect too much from yourself. Do what you can when you can.

My husband has serious debilitating depressive episodes, we have found that increasing his exercise levels. keeping his mind active (online chess, crosswords etc), getting out in the fresh air for at least 15 minutes a day and increasing the amount of fruit and veg keep him on a level. We also did an elimination diet and discovered beef and chicken trigger it so we have one meat meal a week, rest of time we do veggie.

-Charley

[Maureen]

So I have a question, I have have been diagnosed with depression for many, many years and now know why I feel so bad most days (now on some sort of new anti-depression drug and it helps so much) but how does one go about telling friends in church about something like this? I really need to find other members who suffer this, as my member friends seem not to, any ideas?

If you have not told your friends yet, there's a good chance they have not told you their situation either. If you reveal your health problems, you probably will produce confessions from others as well. People assume they suffer and no one else does, and we don't want to admit it. Mention to one friend your health situation and see what happens, you might be surprised.

M.

[Doctor Steuss]

So I have a question, I have have been diagnosed with depression for many, many years and now know why I feel so bad most days (now on some sort of new anti-depression drug and it helps so much) but how does one go about telling friends in church about something like this? I really need to find other members who suffer this, as my member friends seem not to, any ideas?

I am bipolar type II and also have mild schizophrenia. All of my friends and family know because they are my safety line. Your friends are going to be your safety line, and as such, it is beneficial if they know.

There is nothing to be ashamed of. Tell them the same way you would tell them about any other health problem.

You could even give them a copy of this to help "break the ice."

[tiancum]

I was diagnosed with depression a year and a half ago.

Since I was diagnosed, it has been the happiest I have ever been. I still have my down times, but i see them as beautiful now too.

There is hope. It was my faith that lead me to be diagnosed. It was very difficult for me to even go to the Doctor that day, and be labeled. It took ALL my faith and the faith of my wife and kids, and mom and sister.

It is my faith, and gratitude towards Christ that keeps me taking that little pill every day. I am so thankful He provided us with not jsut one, but MANY ways out, through His atonement.

[Flavored_Fruit]

Id keep it all inside. Not many people want to hear about all of your problems.

Obviously you didnt feel comfortable enough to say anything to them.

I bet if you just hold it inside, and dont tell anyone how you feel, that your "depression" will just go away.

Good Luck

[Doctor Steuss]

Id keep it all inside. Not many people want to hear about all of your problems.

Obviously you didnt feel comfortable enough to say anything to them.

I bet if you just hold it inside, and dont tell anyone how you feel, that your "depression" will just go away.

Good Luck

I hope the above was tongue-in-cheek.

[Rebecca2424]

I am bipolar type II and also have mild schizophrenia. All of my friends and family know because they are my safety line. Your friends are going to be your safety line, and as such, it is beneficial if they know.

There is nothing to be ashamed of. Tell them the same way you would tell them about any other health problem.

You could even give them a copy of this to help "break the ice."

Now that artical was wonderful, it made me feel a bit better, and for you to share that with me has helped. I guess the stigma of having well a mental illness does make me feel ashamed and that artical made it clear I am not to blame, as it stated would I be blamed for having cancer or heart problems? To put it in a catigory of illness and not weakness helps. Thank you for your suport in that.

[Doctor Steuss]

Now that artical was wonderful, it made me feel a bit better, and for you to share that with me has helped. I guess the stigma of having well a mental illness does make me feel ashamed and that artical made it clear I am not to blame, as it stated would I be blamed for having cancer or heart problems? To put it in a catigory of illness and not weakness helps. Thank you for your suport in that.

I have an Ensign article somewhere that is different people with mental health problems sharing their stories and what has helped them. I'll see if I can find it tonight (finding it in paper form will help me find you a link to the online version).

Edited to add:

You're not alone, and yes, it is possible to live a full and healthy life... even when you know the dark night of the soul. Hang in there.

[Gabelma]

just wanted to post these they really helped us

http://providentliving.org/content/display...-3236-1,00.html

http://providentliving.org/content/display...-3236-1,00.html

might help tp print off some to show to friends also Chieko Okazaki wrote some great articles about not needing to be perfect

-Charley

[pushka]

A-Train, thank you for posting about your mother's depression and her staying in bed most of the time.

I have recurrent depressive disorder...and have been depressed on an off since my teens, although I was displaying depressive behaviours at an earlier age too. I have a problem with staying out of bed too, unless it is night time when everybody else is asleep, and I can feel protected by the isolation...I have been receiving medical help, medication and therapy since 1990, and have begun to improve in some ways recently. I feel encouraged by offers of college courses run specifically for people with mental health issues, and on those days I can get out of bed and feel good about myself...it is difficult, but most of the time I can manage it. Unfortunately, when I do not have college courses to attend, I cannot motivate myself to get out of bed much at all. I do dwell on all that I am not succeeding in doing, and curl up and sleep more to avoid thinking about those things...I feel guilty if I am awake during the day and choose to read instead of doing housework, and as I'm not doing housework I sleep...irrational I know, but difficult to overcome too. I wish that I had people around me strong enough to force me out of my bed every morning, and who could guide me to do the things around the house that I should be doing, as well as attending my college courses...I wish that I could make myself do these things without anybody's help, sometimes tho, it is impossible for people to get me out of bed even when I have asked them to do so. So I understand some of your mother's issues...I'm sorry that she is going thru them, and wish her luck with one day overcoming them.

Rebecca, I wish you all the best with your depression too, and hope that you will have a positive response to telling others about yourself.

[shanstress70]

<div class='quotemain'>

So I have a question, I have have been diagnosed with depression for many, many years and now know why I feel so bad most days (now on some sort of new anti-depression drug and it helps so much) but how does one go about telling friends in church about something like this? I really need to find other members who suffer this, as my member friends seem not to, any ideas?

We all have trials in life. I would suggest that whenever possible you concentrate on helping someone else with their trials rather than trying to concern them with yours. I have a feeling that because of your experience you could be a great help to many.

The Traveler

Oh absolutely, Traveler! If someone has a chemical imbalance, the way to get it IN balance is to help someone. Helping someone always helps from a chemical standpoint. You MUST be afflicted with these feelings because you aren't helping others enough, or because you're not reading your scriptures, or maybe you just aren't praying hard enough. (In case you guys don't get it, I'm being totally sarcastic.)

Rebecca, please don't listen to this garbage. I'm glad you got some help. Unfortunately, as you can see, many people don't take these problems seriously. Although it's nothing to be ashamed of, you may want to be selective about who you choose to share this info with. I'd reserve it for close friends, or try to find a support group with people who are in your situation. I hope all goes well with you as you deal with this.

My mom slept through her 30s. I would come home from school in the afternoon and she had not yet left the bed! She had been physically abused as a teen, the Relief Society President in her local ward saved her and took her in. She met a great guy at a Church dance, married him and all was looking good. A few years later some punks robbed and murdered her husband and left her a widow with three kids at age 25. She's been depressed her whole life....

...but not because of those circumstances. Her depression is based on low self-esteem and a sense of failure. It's a nasty cycle. She is depressed so she sleeps her life away. Then she wakes up and realizes she is wasting her life, that's depressing so she goes back to sleep. Happiness is always around the corner. The new job, the new car, the new relationship. It never gets any better. Why?

I'm so sorry your mom has to live this way. Will she go to therapy, or get on medication?

My mom is seriously depressed as well but refuses to get help in any form. Her life is miserable and there isn't a d@#$ thing I can do about it.

That generation, in general, sees going to therapy or getting on medication as, "I am a crazy loser". She will never do it. I'm so glad that it's much more acceptable these days to get the help one needs.

If you have a trusted leader, go to them and ask if they know someone with a similiar walk (testimony?). Even if there isn't someone that has depression in an ongoing way, maybe you can find someone who has had post natal depression (which is not that uncommon), who would at least know some of what your going through?

I get what you're saying, but if I talked to my spiritual leader and confided in him with any medical issues I may be experiencing, I would be quite angry if he then shared that with a member of my congregation without getting my permission.

[gabelpa]

- Traveller was tactless in his phrasing but he is right, yes depression has organic courses, but even cancer has a mental element to it. Our bodies and minds have an amazing potential to heal themselves. If you don't take control of an illness it will control you and with depression that is particularly dangerous. Its hard to hear I know I had a psychologist in the early years of my Fibormyalgia tell me this and I was hopping mad. I still think the guy is a jerk but he was right. Every illness is a blessing and is a way to grow closer to our God and to grow closer to our potential

One of the ways we start to find control is to find out about our illness and how we want to treat it and how we want to behave, how we can manage. And Traveller is right finding other people with the illness and helping each other is the way to start. With a chronic illness it can take years but can be done quicker as if you have a life threatening illness you have to

Rebecca maybe you could talk tto your RS President or Compassionate Service Leader and explain what is wrong and what help you need. If they are any good they can 'gossip' for you that way you don't need to tell to many people. Its also good to be able to tell people when you need help, just don't get frustrated if its the wrong kind of help, its just people can't understand what you are going through but they will generally be well meaning. You could also give your RS president to give your contact to someone else who has gone through it in the ward or who is and you can maybe look at doing positive things together like the basics of diet and exercise.

Also don't be shy about using sacrament - church is to edify and uplift if you can talk about your condition in testimonies try to portray it as hard but positive, if you have a talk try and tie it in. You are not alone and by keeping quiet you are doing others a disservice again Traveller is right - In my branch everyone knows I have Fibromyalgia and Post Natel Depression and Dyspraxia. I am the only one that knows of other people, because I am honest about it I have found other people in my small branch. I know more about what goes on in the lives of fellow saints than others. If we are honest about our faults, weaknesses and failings we help others, even if some people get fed up with you doing so. I know the service I have done not many others do.

-Charley

[Doctor Steuss]

<div class='quotemain'>

Now that artical was wonderful, it made me feel a bit better, and for you to share that with me has helped. I guess the stigma of having well a mental illness does make me feel ashamed and that artical made it clear I am not to blame, as it stated would I be blamed for having cancer or heart problems? To put it in a catigory of illness and not weakness helps. Thank you for your suport in that.

I have an Ensign article somewhere that is different people with mental health problems sharing their stories and what has helped them. I'll see if I can find it tonight (finding it in paper form will help me find you a link to the online version).

Edited to add:

You're not alone, and yes, it is possible to live a full and healthy life... even when you know the dark night of the soul. Hang in there.

I wasn't able to find the exact article that I wanted to share with you, but hopefully these will help...

Jan Underwood Pinborough, “Mental Illness: In Search of Understanding and Hope,” Ensign, Feb 1989, 51

Dawn and Jay Fox, “Easing the Burdens of Mental Illness,” Ensign, Oct 2001, 32 (This is a really good one, IMO).

[Gaia]

So I have a question, I have have been diagnosed with depression for many, many years and now know why I feel so bad most days (now on some sort of new anti-depression drug and it helps so much) but how does one go about telling friends in church about something like this? I really need to find other members who suffer this, as my member friends seem not to, any ideas?

GAIA:

Hi Rebecca --

One of the big problems many people run into, is that such problems are not understood to be MEDICAL, they're assumed to be problems with (lack of) faith, obedience to the gospel, etc.

The truth -- which you need to realize, too -- is that depression is chiefly a BIOCHEMICAL problem in the body. It has little if anything to do with faithfulness, with living the gospel, or any of the many other erroneous assumptions many people make about it. And the more you realize and internalize this truth, the easier it will be for you to explain it to others, and to shrug off those ignorant remarks that might (unfortunately and occasionally) be made.

There are support groups, especially in most larger cities, or sometimes affiliated with local hospitals or medical centers, that you might check into. Also check into the NIMH -- National INstitute of Mental Health -- for more suggestions and referrals --

Depression - www.nimh.nih.gov/healthinformation/depressionmenu.cfm

I would respectfully advise you to be careful and discrete about who you discuss this with -- there are still a lot of medieval attitudes about any sort of mental illness. Besides, now that you've found some good meds that are working for you, why would you need to discuss it much, especially with anyone outside your immediate family or those with whom you interact regularly and closely?

Also, in spiritual terms: Remember that Paul is reputed to have suffered some weakness which he referred to several times (see for example, 2 Corinthians 12:9). There's been some discussion about just what that weakness might have been, but it does give an example that demonstrates one does not necessarily loose all human problems just because of faith or righteousess.

Congrats on being diagnosed and treated -- that's a big part of the battle. Stay in close contact with your doctor, and keep him informed on your progress and especially, any problems.

Good luck and Blessings --

~Gaia

Here are some more good resouces, hope they're helpful to you:

1. A good article to help assess the degree of depression a person may be dealing with is David G. Weight, "Why Is My Wife (Or Husband) Depressed?" Ensign, March 1990, 27-29.

2. Ezra Taft Benson, "Do Not Despair," Ensign, October 1986, 2–5

3. See, for example, Severe Depressive Disorders, ed. Leon Grunhaus and John F. Greden (Washington, D.C.: American Psychiatric Press, 1994), 23, 111–35, 251; Depression and the Social Environment, ed. Philippe Cappeliez and Robert J. Flynn (Montreal and Kingston: McGill-Queen's University Press, 1993), 262; Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 4th ed. (Washington, D.C.: American Psychiatric Association, 1994), 340–42; Depression Is a Treatable Illness (Washington, D.C.: U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, 1993); Depression in Primary Care: Detection, Diagnosis, and Treatment (Washington, D.C.: U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, 1993).

4. Allen E. Bergin, I. Reed Payne, Paul H. Jenkins, and Marie Cornwall, "Religion and Mental Health: Mormons and Other Groups," Contemporary Mormonism: Social Science Perspectives, ed. Marie Cornwall, Tim B. Eaton, and Lawrence A. Young (Urbana and Chicago: University of Illinois Press, 1994), 142–43, 145.

5. Neal Maxwell, Notwithstanding My Weakness (Salt Lake City: Deseret Book, 1981), 9–11.

6. Marian S. Bergin, "It Takes More Than Love," Ensign, August 1990, 21; emphasis added..

7. Ann N. Madsen, "Pray with All Energy of Heart," this volume, 102.

8. Dawn Hall Anderson, Susette Fletcher Green, and Dlora Hall Dalton, eds., Clothed with Charity: Talks from the 1996 Women’s Conference [salt Lake City: Deseret Book Co., 1997], 254.)

[Alaskagain]

Oh absolutely, Traveler! If someone has a chemical imbalance, the way to get it IN balance is to help someone. Helping someone always helps from a chemical standpoint. You MUST be afflicted with these feelings because you aren't helping others enough, or because you're not reading your scriptures, or maybe you just aren't praying hard enough. (In case you guys don't get it, I'm being totally sarcastic.)

Rebecca, please don't listen to this garbage.

It's not garbage, Shan. And we can tell when you're being sarcastic.

I don't have any clinical studies to back it up, but I FEEL better when I help someone else. (That is NOT to say that anyone suffers from depression because they aren't treating other people well.)

Maybe doing certain things (like eating right, exercising, and showing concern for others) produces desired brain chemicals and helps level off the imbalance. Just like doing other things (like drinking alcohol, being alone for extended periods, or being self-deprecating) can increase the level of depression. That is not saying there isn't a basic chemical imbalance to begin with. It is true that some actions help, and others make it worse.

(edited to add emoticon)

[Dror]

Rebecca,

Bipolar disorder runs in my family, and I suffer from it myself. Fortunately, it is very treatable and I'm doing ok (now), after finally finding a good combination of meds. Of course I still get depressed from time to time, or a little manic, but for the most part I'm doing a lot better.

There are certainly times when you'll need to talk to people so they know how you're feeling and can help you. If you don't talk, they won't know. Also, you'd be surprised how many people suffer from depression, at least occasionally--you may be able to help them, too!

I know it's difficult to talk about, but it is nothing to be ashamed of. Everybody has their trials and needs help at times.

Dror

[Kasten]

I guess I'm writing this, because I can empathise with what your going through. I was depressed for many years before it was diagnosed. But though I was put on mood stabilizers AND antidepressants, it didn't seem to help much, and I needed help! I tried to explain to my mother what I was going through (I was going to college, and living at home), and she didn't believe me and so wasn't very supportive. My father on the other hand, had bouts himself, and was able to give a listening ear (which I desperately needed). I eventually told friends, and found that often they were more supportive than family. But there is one place that I have always gotten help. And that is through the Bishop/Branch President.

My bishop at the college ward really brought to light Christ's Atonement for all. Did you know that Alma the Younger had emotions exactly like a depressed person? I would suggest you read when he is telling his son what he went through. At the end Alma cries, "Have mercy on me!" And the Atonement heals him. And he talks of happiness after that. (I'm sorry I don't have my scriptures right near to give references.)

Each Priesthood leader, gave me something else to build on, and I survived one day at a time. I got friends that could help a little bit, each in a different way. And now I've discovered a different avenue of help. Compassionate service leader in the Relief Society. They are supposed to find those that need help, and get them help. They are maybe not the specific person to "help" you. But there is that thought.

Good luck to you. Have hope.

[Guest WhoShotJS]

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