askandanswer

Well...the truth comes out.
 
 
 

Apparently he reads Psalms...

Ah, that explains the sudden influx of refugees into my latest universe.

I'm all in favour of fountain pens and inks that have a vanishing point. Hopefully we will reach that point next Tuesday. 

Sigh

I'm all in favour of fountain pens and inks that have a vanishing point. Hopefully we will reach that point next Tuesday. 

Never saw a single BYU show but this conversation just happened one second ago:
Mr. Anatess <looking at bank statements>:  Who just spent $150 on stationary?
Anatess:  I did.  It's not just for stationary, it's for my pens.  It's a splurge I know but I haven't bought anything for myself in a long time.  I tried calling you before I bought it but you didn't pick up your phone.
Mr. Anatess:  You don't have to defend yourself.  Just making sure it wasn't fraud.
Anatess Jr:  Mom hasn't gotten anything in a while... so she spends $150 on a pen... like, that's a whole pair of Michael Kors shoes.
Anatess:  The pen is mightier than the shoes.
Mr. Anatess:  That's almost a shotgun.
Anatess Jr:  I could've invested that money, wait a few years, and buy a Falcor Petra.
Anatess:  Get your own money.  I'm spending mine on pens and stationary so you can go shoot stuff while I write about it.
Mr. Anatess:  I could've gone to a football game.
Anatess Jr:  We're boycotting the NFL.  Mom, go get another pen before Dad spends the money on tickets.
Boom!  And just like that, I can buy another pen...

Music can help by providing perspective and temporary relief
 
1. Where can I turn for peace?
Where is my solace
When other sources cease to make me whole?
When with a wounded heart, anger, or malice,
I draw myself apart,
Searching my soul?
 
2. Where, when my aching grows,
Where, when I languish,
Where, in my need to know, where can I run?
Where is the quiet hand to calm my anguish?
Who, who can understand?
He, only One.
 
3. He answers privately,
Reaches my reaching
In my Gethsemane, Savior and Friend.
Gentle the peace he finds for my beseeching.
Constant he is and kind,
Love without end.
To hear the choir sing this hymn to you, click here, https://www.lds.org/music/library/hymns/where-can-i-turn-for-peace?lang=eng
 
1. Though deep’ning trials throng your way,
Press on, press on, ye Saints of God!
Ere long the resurrection day
Will spread its life and truth abroad,
Will spread its life and truth abroad.
 
2. Though outward ills await us here,
The time, at longest, is not long
Ere Jesus Christ will reappear,
Surrounded by a glorious throng,
Surrounded by a glorious throng.
 
3. Lift up your hearts in praise to God;
Let your rejoicings never cease.
Though tribulations rage abroad,
Christ says, “In me ye shall have peace.”
Christ says, “In me ye shall have peace.”
 
4. What though our rights have been assailed?
What though by foes we’ve been despoiled?
Jehovah’s promise has not failed;
Jehovah’s purpose is not foiled.
Jehovah’s purpose is not foiled
 
5. This work is moving on apace,
And great events are rolling forth;
The kingdom of the latter days,
The “little stone,” must fill the earth.
The “little stone,” must fill the earth.
 
6. Though Satan rage, ’tis all in vain;
The words the ancient prophet spoke
Sure as the throne of God remain;
Nor men nor devils can revoke.
Nor men nor devils can revoke.
 
7. All glory to his holy name
Who sends his faithful servants forth
To prove the nations, to proclaim
Salvation’s tidings through the earth.
Salvation’s tidings through the earth.
https://www.lds.org/music/library/hymns/though-deepening-trials?lang=eng
 
This should help you find the LDS Family Services office closest to your home but before you see them you need to be referred by your bishop. 
https://providentliving.lds.org/lds-family-services/find-an-office?lang=eng
 

I think that all else being equal in the above scenarios, the person in power who does these things should receive a greater penalty than the person not in power simply because more people are likely notice, or become aware of, the sentence given to the person in power, and it is therefore more likely to have a stultifying effect on those who might otherwise be tempted to behave in such a way. 

My dad has pins in his leg which set off the metal detectors.  One time the person at the gate was female and said something about how she would have to pat him down and asked if that was OK.  He said, "Will it cost extra?"

I read this a few minutes ago in the online Deseret News and thought it might be helpful for you and your wife. Its a report of Elder Ballard's remarks at a recent BYU Devotional
https://www.deseretnews.com/article/865692742/Elder-M-Russell-Ballard-tackles-tough-topics-shares-timely-advice-with-BYU-students.html
Answering the question, “My boyfriend struggles with pornography, what should I do?” Elder Ballard encouraged transparency and complete honesty — especially to anyone who is considering marriage.
“Talk with each other and find out where a person’s heart is and what he or she is doing to become a Saint through the Atonement of Jesus Christ,” he said. “However, you shouldn’t be asking these kinds of personal questions when you first meet someone — and certainly not during the first date!”
Recognizing a person may be able to help another person who is sincerely trying to find freedom from habitual use or addiction to the “new drug” of pornography, Elder Ballard said that “too many men and women suffer in silence because we have unintentionally demonized those who are addicted to pornography.
“Parents, family members and friends can do much more to help those in trouble by being willing to listen and offer support and encouragement. Nevertheless, boyfriends and girlfriends are not responsible to ‘save’ their friends from sin, each person has that responsibility.”
To those wondering about if they should proceed in a relationship where pornography is a factor, Elder Ballard said “only you can decide, with the Lord’s help.” “If you choose to remain in a relationship with someone struggling with this temptation, help him or her turn to God in prayer, in fasting and in regular scripture study,” he said. “Additionally, encourage visits with parents, family members, priesthood leaders and/or professional counselors to get additional help and support. There is always hope if they sincerely choose to fight this battle. It may not be easy, but it is worth it!”

GOPe?  What means this thing?  We're only one letter away from GrOPe...

@workingonit First of all, thank you for sharing with us. Please take this from someone who knows, but a relapse does not erase the good you've done to this point! It may delay things, that's up to your bishop and the direction of the Holy Ghost, but that still means you went 8 months without looking at pornography. That is a great accomplishment! The Lord is much more interested in where we are headed than where we are and according to what you said you are on your way up. Don't let Satan convince you that your relapse means you've failed completely. He likes to do that, because if he can convince you that you are lost it's much easier for him to convince you to go right back into your addictions. Tell your wife as soon as you can. Addiction thrives in darkness, and darkness is banished by the light. She may well be dissapointed, but how much more disappointed would she be if you didn't tell her and she found out on her own? She stuck with you through your affairs, so she sees something in you worth fighting for. I'm going to echo Elder Holland and say "Don't you quit!" You fell down on your journey upward. But our Savior is standing over you with an outstretched hand waiting to pull you back up again and continue your journey to salvation. With His help brother, don't go backward, keep going forward. I know you will find the salvation you seek if you do.

I read this a few minutes ago in the online Deseret News and thought it might be helpful for you and your wife. Its a report of Elder Ballard's remarks at a recent BYU Devotional
https://www.deseretnews.com/article/865692742/Elder-M-Russell-Ballard-tackles-tough-topics-shares-timely-advice-with-BYU-students.html
Answering the question, “My boyfriend struggles with pornography, what should I do?” Elder Ballard encouraged transparency and complete honesty — especially to anyone who is considering marriage.
“Talk with each other and find out where a person’s heart is and what he or she is doing to become a Saint through the Atonement of Jesus Christ,” he said. “However, you shouldn’t be asking these kinds of personal questions when you first meet someone — and certainly not during the first date!”
Recognizing a person may be able to help another person who is sincerely trying to find freedom from habitual use or addiction to the “new drug” of pornography, Elder Ballard said that “too many men and women suffer in silence because we have unintentionally demonized those who are addicted to pornography.
“Parents, family members and friends can do much more to help those in trouble by being willing to listen and offer support and encouragement. Nevertheless, boyfriends and girlfriends are not responsible to ‘save’ their friends from sin, each person has that responsibility.”
To those wondering about if they should proceed in a relationship where pornography is a factor, Elder Ballard said “only you can decide, with the Lord’s help.” “If you choose to remain in a relationship with someone struggling with this temptation, help him or her turn to God in prayer, in fasting and in regular scripture study,” he said. “Additionally, encourage visits with parents, family members, priesthood leaders and/or professional counselors to get additional help and support. There is always hope if they sincerely choose to fight this battle. It may not be easy, but it is worth it!”

In politics, in business, in marriage, in all sorts of stuff, it often seems that the cover up and denial generates more anger and mistrust than the act that is being covered up.
I suspect that it would be helpful for both of you to educate yourself together on the nature of addiction, how/when/why it occurs, and what can be done about it. I'm sure there are a lot of good resources, both in the church and in the community that you could watch/read/listen to together, and then discuss together. A lot of fear and uncertainty is generated by ignorance and misunderstanding, whereas an informed understanding is more likely to lead to compassion, support and empathy.
ps
Don't discount the possibility that she already knows or suspects, based on changes in your behaviour, and is just waiting and hoping for you to come forward and tell her. Sometimes observant partners can know when these things are happening.

In politics, in business, in marriage, in all sorts of stuff, it often seems that the cover up and denial generates more anger and mistrust than the act that is being covered up.
I suspect that it would be helpful for both of you to educate yourself together on the nature of addiction, how/when/why it occurs, and what can be done about it. I'm sure there are a lot of good resources, both in the church and in the community that you could watch/read/listen to together, and then discuss together. A lot of fear and uncertainty is generated by ignorance and misunderstanding, whereas an informed understanding is more likely to lead to compassion, support and empathy.
ps
Don't discount the possibility that she already knows or suspects, based on changes in your behaviour, and is just waiting and hoping for you to come forward and tell her. Sometimes observant partners can know when these things are happening.

In politics, in business, in marriage, in all sorts of stuff, it often seems that the cover up and denial generates more anger and mistrust than the act that is being covered up.
I suspect that it would be helpful for both of you to educate yourself together on the nature of addiction, how/when/why it occurs, and what can be done about it. I'm sure there are a lot of good resources, both in the church and in the community that you could watch/read/listen to together, and then discuss together. A lot of fear and uncertainty is generated by ignorance and misunderstanding, whereas an informed understanding is more likely to lead to compassion, support and empathy.
ps
Don't discount the possibility that she already knows or suspects, based on changes in your behaviour, and is just waiting and hoping for you to come forward and tell her. Sometimes observant partners can know when these things are happening.

In politics, in business, in marriage, in all sorts of stuff, it often seems that the cover up and denial generates more anger and mistrust than the act that is being covered up.
I suspect that it would be helpful for both of you to educate yourself together on the nature of addiction, how/when/why it occurs, and what can be done about it. I'm sure there are a lot of good resources, both in the church and in the community that you could watch/read/listen to together, and then discuss together. A lot of fear and uncertainty is generated by ignorance and misunderstanding, whereas an informed understanding is more likely to lead to compassion, support and empathy.
ps
Don't discount the possibility that she already knows or suspects, based on changes in your behaviour, and is just waiting and hoping for you to come forward and tell her. Sometimes observant partners can know when these things are happening.

Turkey recipe: Do whatever wife tells you to do, make several trips to the store upon request, spend the rest of your time going through old photos in the basement.  

That's fine for people who think but we're talking about Gator here. And from what I can remember of Descartes, he never allowed for the possibility that the thoughts he thought he was thinking could have been inserted into his head by an alien exercising some form of mind control. So being aware of thoughts in our head is not a sure sign that we exist. 

Are you sure you are really you? (Sounds like a good question for someone who studied philosophy)

WAIT WHAT?  Did you just call POTUS Presidential???   Hallelujah!

@person0, if I understand correctly, you're saying you'll get a 15 year mortgage and pay it off in 5-7 years, right?
Further, you feel like the Lord has told you to do this, right?  (The when, the where, the what are all confirmed by the Spirit?)
So the problem is, you don't wanna go into debt, for personal reasons and because the Church recommends against it where possible and to get out of it as quickly as possible (clearly you plan to do that rather than take the whole 15 years), right?
Therefore, it seems unlikely that your personal desires are masquerading as the Spirit.  I suspect the Lord is guiding you to a place where you will be better off (I don't mean materially), and / or where others will be better off due to your presence.  It will be interesting to hear about your life between now and 7 years from now.

Being agreeable while disagreeing.   I think you'll need to take special college courses to learn how to do it.