BeccaKirstyn

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BeccaKirstyn last won the day on November 14 2015

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About BeccaKirstyn

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    Female
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    LDS

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  1. That is a difficult situation to be in. Definitely let the bishop figure out the records thing. As for your relationship with this person and how to handle conversations about going to church/activities, I would just say that you're not able to give her rides anymore and leave it at that. If she asks why, then you just say it's a personal matter and you'd wish to not discuss it.
  2. BeccaKirstyn

    Closing Hymn

    Thanks!
  3. BeccaKirstyn

    Closing Hymn

    Has anyone’s ward ever had their choir sing the closing song? During a normal church meeting? Is there anything in the handbook about that? Just haven’t ever experienced that before....
  4. BeccaKirstyn

    If not BYU, then what college to send the kids to?

    And it's very common for college kids to work part-time jobs or even full-time jobs to help pay for school. I personally believe it makes you a better student. You learn to prioritize your time more wisely, you gain more skills than you would just going to your classes and coming home. And you're building your resume while you're preparing for a job within your field. I'm a huge proponent of kids working during college. It is very doable. Easy? Nope, but doable and well worth it.
  5. BeccaKirstyn

    If not BYU, then what college to send the kids to?

    Some in-state universities offer scholarships for kids who stay in the state instead of leaving for another university out-of-state. Look into (or have your child look into) the scholarship options your in-state universities offer! This will also save you money as they will most likely live at home (unless you prefer them not to)--which wouldn't be the case at BYU. Unless you live in Utah or Idaho....and then my last point is null. My in-state university ended up being cheaper for me than BYU because I could live at home and because I received a scholarship for graduating from a state high school with a specific GPA. Good luck!
  6. BeccaKirstyn

    Women and temples

    I would tell her to go to the source of where she finds truth--whatever that may be. And that these types of questions are not bad to have. As long as you look for answers in the right places (like many discussed here). And to try to take away her "worldly" view of the temple, which is hard to do but helps with understanding and interpreting the symbolic nature of the temple ordinances. This may take many visits and time, but if she is truly seeking answers to these questions, this is how she will successfully do so.
  7. BeccaKirstyn

    Fates worse than death

    Hi, @Eternum. Forgive me if I have interpreted your story incorrectly. You said you were in therapy in the past--have you continued that? Or have you considered going again if you are not currently doing so?
  8. Junior, your wife as you said will not magically change her mind about your attendance at church in a day. So her feelings about you going to church will not magically be okay with it in one day. This will be a long journey for both of you. One that if you stay on the defensive about, you'll never go back. I can guarantee you that every time you want to bring this subject back up again with your wife, it will be the same reasonings from her. Because you haven't actually had a real, open, and honest discussion (not just blaming you--this is also on her). If you go to church on Sunday will your wife be upset? Yep. If you wait until your wife says she's more "adjusted" with the baby, will she be upset that you ask her if you can go to church? I can almost guarantee it. Because your wife's opinion of the church has never changed since the moment you met her. So why would that change, unless you have more open and honest discussions about it? This includes telling her how important this part of your life is to you and SHOWING her how important it is to you. Not every relationship is the same. Don't compare yours to the other gentlemen who has been describing how his past marriage fought over church. You are describing how you want to try to please your wife by not upsetting her. Is your wife pleasing you to try to not upset you? Does it upset you that you can't go to church? Marriage will constantly be about compromise on both ends. The only thing I find interesting about your post is that you came to discuss your frustrations about not being able to attend church due to your wife's complaints about it, yet all responses to try to help you find a way to get there have been met with reasons as to why you can't make it happen. Were you looking for advice or to just vent your frustration? Both are fine, but if it was more the latter then I would suggest to maybe phrase your posts in such a way. Otherwise you'll be met with lots of posts like this one and others that are trying to help you change your circumstances, when you're not ready to do so.
  9. BeccaKirstyn

    Anti-abortion bill in Alabama

    Yeah doesn't really change how disgusted I feel when I think about the women in Alabama who are raped who can no longer receive an abortion if they do not want to carry the child of a rapist. Morally do I support aborting children? No. Morally do I support women having the option to choose to do so? Yes. So just because the law doesn't "directly" address mothers doesn't make them feel any less powerful in this situation now. They have no legal means to choose to abort a child that is the product of rape.
  10. BeccaKirstyn

    Anti-abortion bill in Alabama

    On the other hand of this argument is something mentioned earlier in this thread. That the definition of human life, per the law, does not coincide with viewing a fetus as a human. Whether or not I agree with that is again a mute point. But using this argument that the death of a fetus is just the same as the death of another human being cannot be backed up using law, which is what state and federal case law is based off of. So in this regard, the Alabama ruling should not be upheld until the definition of human life is changed.
  11. BeccaKirstyn

    Anti-abortion bill in Alabama

    I appreciate the viewpoint. And this is definitely the part of the "argument" that keeps me from being stuck on either side of it, but kind of on the fence.
  12. BeccaKirstyn

    Anti-abortion bill in Alabama

    I hope so. If this is the start of an appeals process for these types of laws to make it to the supreme court to try to reverse the original Roe v. Wade decision, I very much hope that the federal government will not side with the state. Or try to create new precedent in favor of such a strict abortion ban at a federal level. That would feel like a lot of progress lost over the course of many years in our judiciary system.
  13. BeccaKirstyn

    Anti-abortion bill in Alabama

    As someone who likes research, I'd be interested to see how this law will affect the state of Alabama over the next 5-10 years. How many women will report that they received an abortion through illegal means? How many will report that this ban changed their decision about whether or not to get an illegal abortion? How many individuals will "change" their mind about their stance on abortion? How many people will move from Alabama so to not be affected by this law? Only time will tell.
  14. BeccaKirstyn

    Anti-abortion bill in Alabama

    Are you asking my opinion? Because "my" opinion doesn't really matter in the state of Alabama, as I am neither a resident of that state nor a legislator. We've asked many of these questions to those who reside in Alabama and many have disagreed with the stance that has been made. I personally have a difficult time with the law, but it is not my state.
  15. BeccaKirstyn

    Anti-abortion bill in Alabama

    I have a hard time with this new law. I unfortunately view it in the same context as those who want to ban all weapons. Such a ban would not get rid of the use of weapons....just the legal ways to obtain them. Such is the same with this abortion ban. Banning abortion in the state of Alabama does not get rid of abortion in that state...just the legal (and safe) ways of doing so. I am all about agency. To choose for oneself of how you want to live your life. Do I want to protect the life of a fetus? Absolutely, I do. But, if my friend, who chooses to have an abortion, doesn't feel the same, who am I (or who is the government) to tell her what to do? To get in the way of her agency. I don't know. This has always been a very sticky and difficult issue that I have gone back and forth on for many years. But this law just does not feel right to me.