NeuroTypical

Because you're supposed to seek it. I don't understand the question. We're also supposed to avoid violent entertainment. It's almost like you don't understand the claim many of us are making. Again - here it is: Can you give us some indication that you're grasping the difference between being entertained by violence, and being edified by it?

Very well said.

I haven't answered that question, because I think it's an invalid question. I don't see the Savior endorsing any particular activity, any more than I can see Him endorsing any particular brand of detergent, or little-league, or what have you. There is a scripture saying we are to defend our families even unto bloodshed. God has taken sides and helped or hindered various people in violent conflicts, on both individual and collective levels. The D&C tells us we can be justified in dealing out harm or death "in times of exigency, where immediate appeal cannot be made to the laws, and relief afforded", should lesser means not be effecacious. From what I can tell, the intents of our heart are a big part of how we're judged. Also from what I can tell, scripture and the church both advocate having our heart's compass pointed in the right direction. So, violent bloody entertainment is not good for us and should be avoided. Studying violence and blood as a way to carry out our stewardships may be appropriate in some situations. LM

I used to try to hometeach a family that lived in an apartment building. The last week of October, they had a large poster taped to their door containing a long wordy rant about how kids should not knock on their door, and they don't celebrate haloween because they're mormon, and you shouldn't either because it's all about demons, and everyone is going to hell if things don't change, and blah blah blah. I would advise against something like that. Although it did present me with a missionary moment as I was able to explain to a neighbor about how no, all mormons aren't really like that. LM

It depends. If you are trying to pick apart and disprove the BoM by asking questions, no, you should not do that here. If you wish to criticize or argue or prove wrong, you might want to consider a forum such as www.mormonapologetics.orgIf you genuinely don't understand something, and want clarification about what we believe or why we believe it, then yes, this forum is a good place to ask. LM

This resonates with me - I spent the first quarter century of my life not knowing who or what I was, seeking out others' opinions on which to base my sense of self. Now - just no longer caring what everyone else thinks about you - that's not really the answer. The answer is to develop a strong, defined sense of self - one you're willing to defend against opposing opinions. I started doing that around age 26, and the process wasn't really complete until in my 30's. Actually, it's never really complete - it's just that if someone is thinking I ought to do/be different, I pretty much always have an answer for why I'm doing/being what I am in the first place. And it takes pretty decent convincing to get me to change these days. It still happens, but not as often as it used to. And it's important to hold some peoples opinions about you in high regard. Otherwise, you run the risk of becoming a smug self-righteous insufferable jerk. (Or at least coming across like one.) Some might be reading this from me, and rolling their eyes, because I just described myself. I'm ocassionaly in partial agreement with these people, hence my self-effacing screen name and avatar. LM

Yeah, nobody asked me to muddy the waters further, but here goes: Last year I went hunting for the first time. I sucessfully shot and killed a doe, a process that involved picking one of God's creatures, placing her in the crosshairs, and blowing a big hole in her. I further worked an additional process on her called "cleaning and dressing", but is more accurately described as "ripping guts out, peeling the skin off, and cutting off the head". I found the experience to be highly spiritual - one that brought me closer to my Heavenly Father. Even though I came home covered in blood and stinking of guts and carnage. There have been many people who have expressed a total lack of understanding of how such a bloody gory thing could be spiritual. There have been many people who question the discipleship of people who hunt. Now that I've been through the process for myself, I don't really have much to say to those people. It's not my problem that they don't get it. LM

I appreciate that quote.

My kids had their Girl Scout haloween party last week. My work is having kids wander the aisles on Friday the 29th. Our ward will be doing something one of these weekends. We're going to Cheyenne Mountain's Boo at the Zoo for the umpteenth year in a row. After all that, I don't think we'll even notice the actual date of Haloween. If anyone does notice, I'll be sure to roll them back over onto their pile of candy so they can get themselves back into their sugar coma. LM

I should cite my source. There is a LSCW practicing here in Colorado Springs. She helped edit And They Were Not Ashamed, and she is friends with the author Laura M. Brotherson. She tells me the author submitted a final draft to church HQ for approval, made the couple of changes requested by the brethren, and then she published the book. It's not an official church publication, and it's not taught in our church buildings. But yes, it has been reviewed and approved by church leadership. LM

Many LDS are not Dr. Laura fans, and find her harsh, abrasive, uncharitable, and potentially harmful. Many LDS are Dr. Laura fans, finding her style and techniques useful and helpful. I'm a Dr. Laura fan, and I've read the book. I recommend all women read it before getting married, and after getting married if the marriage is in trouble. I recommend men do not read it, as it only causes pain to hear those things advocated and then not see your wife doing them. If men want to read a Dr. Laura book, go for Proper Care and Feeding of Marriage. And speaking of required reading for marriage, I can't say enough good things about And They Were Not Ashamed: Strengthening Marriage Through Sexual Fulfillment It is the LDS version of a 'how to do it' book. Approved by the church. Good reading for those going to be married, and those already married. LM

Hey zx10 Girls are different than boys. They can do this stuff and not be bugged by it. If you have evidence there is incest going on in their home, you might want to reconsider marrying someone who figures incest is ok. But if that's not happening (and it sounds like it isn't), drop it. Forever. LM

CUTE! My shortest kid has spent a year reaching such milestones. Of course, she's a tornado wild child, so she does things like run full speed smack into the kitchen table, and then staggers backwards saying "I used to be able to run under that!"LM

Surehand, it's obvious that you are here to beat us over the head with this story. Just like Gerlinde and others before you. Sometimes we get folks who come here, harp on this story, refuse to do anything besides paint the issue in the darkest terms possible, and get themselves banned. You're heading that way yourself. The saddest part is, this criticism doesn't hold any water. There is a DNA research project out there. They were able to test the DNA of a descendant of Zebulon Jacobs, one of Zina's kids supposedly fathered by Joseph. It was confirmed that Henry Jacobs was the father - not Joseph. Check out the website yourself. It sounds like Mary E. Lightner was misinformed, lied to, was lying herself, or otherwise incorrect. DNA science cannot do many things, but the things it can do, it does with a great deal of certainty. And disprove the claims of ancestry is one of them. LM

Small things? That's a toughie - I want to focus on the big things. But here goes: * Falling computer prices. We've finally been able to afford a tablet PC with touch screen so my daughter with muscle issues can practice her handwriting. Couldn't do this back when they cost five grand. * The person who figured out how to have clocks set themselves. * The late rain that brought the toads to life in our area. We stuck two of them in our empty fish tank, and the girls are having endless fun playing with Whizzer and Goliath. * My work keeps a fridge stocked with free sodas. That rocks. * Mint, peppermint, and spearmint. The smell, the taste - just makes me happy. LM

ST : Deep Space 9 did a great service to the whole thing, by having the Ferrengi Quark [unrestrained capitalism] and the Cardassian Garek [socialism to the point of fascism] sitting at the bar griping about the Federation.QUARK: Here, I want you to try something for me. Take a sip of this. GARAK: What is it? QUARK: A human drink. It's called "root-beer". GARAK: I don't know... QUARK: Go ahead. Aren't you just a little bit curious? [Garak hesitates a beat, but then takes a sip. He immediately makes a face.] QUARK: What do you think? GARAK: It's vile. QUARK: I know. It's so bubbly and cloying and ... happy. GARAK: Just like the Federation. QUARK: But you know what's really frightening? If you drink enough of it, you start to like it. GARAK: It's insidious. QUARK: Just like the Federation. LM

Excellent last two posts, Faded! It helped me put a lot of my thoughts into words. One small element of disagreement though: I've got the same goal in mind with my two little girls. However, facing a single adversary that you expected to see, and can clearly see across a well-lighted octagon doesn't always reflect what you find in real life. Yeah, the Gracie family showed us what works best 1:1 when an unarmed fight is expected. What works best against a group? Or when you've been partially disabled? Or when your attacker is armed with things they don't let into the ring? What form prepares you to react the quickest against a surprise encounter? Or teaches you the best situational awareness so you can avoid the encounter in the first place? I'm thinking the jury is still out on those...I see martial arts as a major component of self-defense, but only one of several components. And for that matter, self-defense is only one component of overall preparadness against the trials and tribulations life throws at us. I find it useful and good to discuss, plan, and train for physical confrontations against bad guys (especially if you're raising girls like I am). But I also find it useful to look at self-defense as what place it holds in my overall life. This is a great thread, btw! LM

2 months you say? Ahh, sweet infatuation. It feels great. Everything is so wonderful. But it's very temporary. You don't know this lady after 2 months, you just feel like you do. It's possible she's the best catch in the world, but even if she's a train wreck waiting to happen, it could still feel this good at 2 months. Here's a fun suggestion - start a journal, and write about her in it every night or two. The good and the bad - don't show it to her - this is just for you. Around the one year mark, start from the beginning and read what it was like 10 months ago. If you wonder who that person was saying all that dumb stuff, you'll see the infatuation has started to wear off, and you are seeing more clearly now. If you continue to think she's wonderful after a year, your odds of being correct are going up. Anyway, full disclosure here: I think I violated some of the advice I give other people, so take it for what it's worth. One, and one. I fasted for 3 days and showed up to my patriarchical blessing appointment with the engagement ring in my hand. I never could have decided on my own - I needed God's direct input on the matter.Happy dating! LM

I honestly have no idea what a diva princess is. But kids should be raised with a little scarcity and a little "no". The times there is a "no", it's a final "no". Throw whatever fits you choose honey - the place for fit throwing is your bed. Lemme know when you're done, and we'll go play. But the answer is no. LM

A few quotes:

You can't make people see anything. The gospel of Jesus Christ is not something that can be forced on someone - it is something they must accept and invite into their hearts by themselves.Overlyanxous frustrated Mormons helped me feel much more comfortable about my choice to go inactive for six years. Being away from their hand-wringing and "oh dear"ing was a blessing, not a curse. Just love this lady, and respect her agency. LM

So, Dash is getting pretty beat up in this thread (verbally, of course). But I think he's making a very basic point that I agree with: Ya shouldn't glorify violence and seek to be entertained by it. From the Strength of the Youth Pamphlet: Most everyone on the other side of this fence, are telling Dash they're not glorifying violence or watching it to be entertained. They're learning about reality, becoming edified about what the wonderful levels of conditioning a human body is capable of, thinking through their own actions in situations where they may need to defend themselves. Nobody here likes to drool beer all over themselves while shouting "H*LL YEAH" watching someone get their brains punched in. And that seems to be dash's main gripe - is that folks who do, aren't following the path Christ would have them follow. Whaddaya all say? LM

Hi Kyro, The Lord knows something about humans. Put 1000 people in a situation where "under certain circumstances my girlfriend lives with me", but "we don't have sex though, we sleep in 2 different rooms". Within a year, there will be babies. Yeah, of course you don't have a problem. Neither do any of the other 1000 guys in your situation. And yet somehow, babies end up appearing like magic - robbed of their right of a stable intact family with husband and wife who are committed to each other. You see the blessings right before your eyes. Doesn't that mean it is worth making the lifestyle changes the Lord asks of you, in order to make all those blessings yours? LM

Sounds great - I'll add it to my netflix queue. Another favorite of mine is Jackie Chan's "Legend of Drunken Master". If I had the funds, I'd probably get my whole family going on Parker's American Kenpo (aka "Mormon Martial arts"). Not because Parker is LDS, but because of it's practical usage in real life. I have to figure out something - I'm thinking it's part of my stewardship as a father to make sure my two girls don't reach puberty without being confident in their ability to drop an attacker a few different ways. LM

This story is a dang shame. I'm always giving my cousin grief for living in Utah among all the dang mormons. We relish in such lighthearted banterous back-and-forthings and witty zingers. I understand that dood was fired because he violated his company's policy. It makes sense that you fire someone doing something like that in a workplace setting. It's a shame because one, it was a mistake on his part, two, I'd have absolutely no problem with the guy saying stuff like this on his personal twitter account, and three, I've said similar things and worse a billion times when talking smack at my cousin. I hope the guy finds a new job. LM