Do you feel that dreams have real meaning?

[theBUBBAMANcan]

I'm in the process of getting a divorce. I found out that my wife was having an affair. We have 3 kids and have been married 8 years.

Filing for a divorce was the most difficult decision of my life...mostly because I hate to do anything that causes pain to my children.

My wife has had problems with alcoholism for her whole life, and she is not dealing with it.

The problem has been actually getting much worse over the years. I hate to imagine how it would be to still be with her in another 10 yrs.

I had a dream a few nights ago. In it, I spoke with my father...who has been deceased since '93. I asked him in this dream if I was doing the right thing. He said nothing but just nodded his head "yes".

This dream haunts me. I usually don't even remember my dreams.

Should I give any meaning to this dream?

[gabelpa]

Only you can answer that question through prayer and study.

[theBUBBAMANcan]

Only you can answer that question through prayer and study.

Prayer and talking to friends/relatives have led me in the same direction.

[Elgama]

I don't usually dream and mine usually do have significance - which is bothering me with one particular one right now.

Divorce was best thing to have happened to my Mum didn't stop the alcoholism immediately but she has learned to mostly stand up for herself better and has progressed more

[Guest mormonmusic]

As I said in a different post, one branch of psychology related to the study of dreams indicates that dreams are fulfilment of wishes. Therefore, we tend to dream about things that alllow us to play out our needs and desires.

Therefore, the dream may simply be an attempt by your subconscious mind to validate the decision you're making.

However, the scriptures also show that many people have had dreams that are communication from God. However, I've never seen much doubt expressed in the descriptions of these dreams by the dream-holder about whether they were divine. When the dream is inspired, it seems to leave a real confidence in the mind of the person who had a dream.

Since you don't seem to know for sure, I might conclude that the dream wasn't necessarily inspired, but an attempt to validate the decision you're making.

However, I personally decided years ago that if my wife had an affair, it would be over between us, and to throw alcoholism into the mix -- I'm not sure many people would blame you for wanting to start anew. Especially if you're taking your children out of the alcoholism context.

[MisterT]

Dreams, primarily, are nothing more than the random firing of neurons while we sleep; the unconcious part of the brain has to cleans its self of emotions it can't deal with; fear, fright, lonliness, longing, etc. and it does this through dreaming.

Dreams of a holy nature, in my opinion, aren't dreams, but visions in an altered state of conciousness.

We know from brainscans of dreaming patients what's happening in their minds, electrically speaking, and modern medical psychology has a pretty good handle on defining what dream pattern relate to; usually angst and pain. I don't think that a brainscan has ever been done on someone having a legitimate vision, so nothing is known about brainwave activity during one.

Its my opinion that there is little purpose in having a dream-vision when simply praying about an issue, with a determined heart and true purpose will get you the answer that Heavenly Father feels is appropriate.

FWIW I'm always 100% aware of my dreams and always know when I'm dreaming. I haven't had a nightmare since I was a child as I know when I'm having one and can change the course of the dream; a not unusual ability amongst people who have severe sleep disturbances such as I.

[annamaureen]

I think most dreams are unimportant, but sometimes they can have a higher meaning.

[crazypotato]

I say don't go to LDS.net for your answer on this. Go with your gut feeling. Our ancestors sometimes can communicate with us from the other side. I have had dreams that meant something. Dreams can be a form of personal revelation. My husband was warned in a dream one time.

Nonsense dreams that you do or don't remember are one thing. Dreams where you are talking to a deceased relative are entirely different.

[marts1]

I have not ever had a dream such as your describing. If I did I sure would sit up and take notice.

[MarginOfError]

I'll share with you my experience with dreams, and hopefully it can help you out a little bit.

I lived in Eastern Europe for a couple of years, and that culture has this big affinity for dreams. This is particularly strong among some of the more prone-to-insanity types. Anyway, in my discussions with some of the people there, they would tell me about dreams they had had and ask me what I thought it might mean. I never knew, and I was never comfortable interpreting people's dreams, so I would tell them that. Oftentimes, they would then proceed to try to interpret their own dream and they always sounded nuts. I always felt uncomfortable listening to them try to figure out what the dreams meant.

Except for one woman. We were talking with her about the Church and trying to find out if she was ready and willing to make the lifestyle changes that entailed. On of her concerns with the Church was that she didn't want to give up coffee and tea. During one of our conversations, she told me she'd had a dream. I fought very hard to fight the rolling of my eyes. Then she said, "I was reading a book. On one page it said 'coffee,' and on the other, it said 'tea.' Then the book closed in my lap. And I knew, I have to give up coffee and tea." This time, I was bowled over by the Spirit.

That experience taught me something though. It taught me that when God communicates to us through dreams, he gives us the interpretation of the dream along with it. As I studied the scriptures more I started to notice this same pattern. In Lehi's first vision, he's told what the elements of his dream mean. There is plenty of evidence to suggest he understood the meaning of his vision of the Tree of Life. Nephi, when he saw the same vision, was accompanied by an angel to help him understand the dream.

I seem to recall reading somewhere later that same sentiment-that we are only expected to follow our dreams if an interpretation is provided. This article or book made reference to one of Ezekiel's visions, stating that since no interpretation of the dream had been revealed, we weren't expected to understand or adhere to the message contained therein.

So, I'd say if you felt like the meaning of your dream was revealed to you, then you should take it seriously. If you don't feel that it was, then don't worry about it.

[Bini]

Like someone else said. Most dreams are probably nonsense but every once in a while you may have one that means something. I also agree with whoever said that dreams are often times oppressed wishes and or desires.

[dazed-and-confused]

i am one of those people that is aware in dreams, so that i KNOW that i am dreaming and am usually aware of dreams within dreams...it's called lucid dreaming, i think. in my own research into dreaming i've learned that dreams are a reflection of what is happening in our lives, physically, emotionally and yes, spiritually. the "trick" is figuring out which is which, the nonsense from the inspirational.

prayer and guidance from HF is the only way i was ever able to find out how to get a clue on that.

[pam]

With me personally, I tend to find my dreams are nothing more than extensions or have similiarities of something that I did, watched or heard sometime during the day before going to sleep.

[MurphyGal]

About two weeks before I even suspected I was pregnant, I had a dream. I was walking in a parking lot to an ice cream shop. A little blond boy, about four years old, came from another area of the parking lot, joined me and we both walked to the ice cream shop together. The next image in the dream showed him sitting across from me at a little round marble table. He looked at me and said, "I'm your son!" The dream ended right then.

When I was four months along, the doctor asked me if I wanted to know the gender of my baby. I said YES! He said, it's a boy.

My son's father left me when I was six months along in my pregnancy. I was devastated. Even though I was working full time, I was engulfed in a crippling depression. The father walked completely away and my anger grew so deep and permeated my entire being. Moments would come along where I would think "And his baby is inside of me." Of course, I knew it was MY baby, too. But the emotions were so bad.

As bad as it got emotionally, financially, physically...I knew from the spirit that I had met my son in my dream. I completely believe that Heavenly Father knew that I needed this thread, this image, this voice, this sweet spirit to help carry me through mentally.

When Sean became three or four, his face when he looked at me, was the exact face I saw in my dream.

Others may scoff, but I know it was him.

Murph

[GADBabaganoosh]

I myself have been having nightmares the past week. They get real bad when I wake up and feel like I can't move. It's rather creepy. Everything is loud all of a sudden. My roommate was up late and the noise was really loud and I was awake and frozen in bed. I feel great fear. It's really really weird and disturbing actually.

[marts1]

I have had the same experience. In my case it was evil spirits.

[MisterT]

Being semi-aware and unable to move with intense feelings of fear are typically known as sleep-paralysis; you're technically awake, but your neurons are still randomly firing so you have mini-hallucinations (usually intense feelings of fear or if someone else is in the room with you), and your body is still paralized from the chemicals the petuitary gland secrets; this generally causes a state of panic, feelings of being watched or having someone pressing down on you, auditory or visual hallucinations, etc.

I experience sleep paralysis regularly; typically because of how heavily medicated I am to sleep, and the types of medications I take (non-benzodiazapine setative hypnotics).

[marts1]

Well my case was not typical then. My wife was beside me feeling the same stuff. When I said the proper words or at least tryed to things got better immediately.

[crazypotato]

Bubbaman,

LDS.net is just of group of strangers, a lot who happen to be LDS. I recommend you go to the temple if you are endowed, and after a session, sit and ponder and pray in the Celestial room. If you have faith that God will answer your prayer, sit in there and pray about your divorce. You may even feel your father in there with you. The Lord with answer your prayers in the Celestial room more clearly than anywhere else. Sit and give him some time. This has ALWAYS worked for me. You may have to frame your questions smaller than, "Should I get a divorce" to "is it okay for me to take my kids and I away from my alcoholic wife, or should I stay with her for a while?"

I find that in this forums, there are different experiences and thoughts that may help you, and people that may cause you to doubt. Go to God. We all can be deceived.

And as far as the person with freaky nightmares of sleep paralysis, science explains all of that away. But for those who have been through it and have seen the evil spirit in their room, and have cast the spirit out in the name of Jesus Christ, we don't need science or skeptics to tell us we were wrong. It happens to lots of people and I can testify that it is real. There is sleep paralysis, but it is not the same as that creepy, dark presence.

[theBUBBAMANcan]

Bubbaman,

LDS.net is just of group of strangers, a lot who happen to be LDS. I recommend you go to the temple if you are endowed, and after a session, sit and ponder and pray in the Celestial room. If you have faith that God will answer your prayer, sit in there and pray about your divorce. You may even feel your father in there with you. The Lord with answer your prayers in the Celestial room more clearly than anywhere else. Sit and give him some time. This has ALWAYS worked for me. You may have to frame your questions smaller than, "Should I get a divorce" to "is it okay for me to take my kids and I away from my alcoholic wife, or should I stay with her for a while?"

I find that in this forums, there are different experiences and thoughts that may help you, and people that may cause you to doubt. Go to God. We all can be deceived.

And as far as the person with freaky nightmares of sleep paralysis, science explains all of that away. But for those who have been through it and have seen the evil spirit in their room, and have cast the spirit out in the name of Jesus Christ, we don't need science or skeptics to tell us we were wrong. It happens to lots of people and I can testify that it is real. There is sleep paralysis, but it is not the same as that creepy, dark presence.

I agree with what you said...but there is also some value in throwing these questions out to the world ...sometimes you get some good responses.

That doesn't mean that the internet is making my life decisions for me.

[crazypotato]

Of course I never meant to imply that you are using us to make your decisions and I never thought so. I was only trying to emphasize the reality of revelation being so accessible in the temple. And advice from a collective group of people, even those who are well-intentioned, can actually sometimes be completely the wrong way for a person to go.

I have been in a place in my life where everyone was telling me - bishop, family members, friends, counselors, to divorce my spouse. Everyone except the Holy Ghost. It left me feeling very, very, very confused for years, but I hung on to the Holy Ghost. Looking back, the advice wasn't bad, the God knows and sees all and sometimes gives us answers that don't make sense at the time.

[Bini]

Being semi-aware and unable to move with intense feelings of fear are typically known as sleep-paralysis; you're technically awake, but your neurons are still randomly firing so you have mini-hallucinations (usually intense feelings of fear or if someone else is in the room with you), and your body is still paralized from the chemicals the petuitary gland secrets; this generally causes a state of panic, feelings of being watched or having someone pressing down on you, auditory or visual hallucinations, etc.

I experience sleep paralysis regularly; typically because of how heavily medicated I am to sleep, and the types of medications I take (non-benzodiazapine setative hypnotics).

I experienced an intense hallucination just as you described in my late teens. I was in bed but still awake. I remember a shadowy figure appearing before me, leaning over me and its arms reaching for my throat. I felt nothing but I was so frightened I couldn't move or scream no matter how much I tried. I consulted my doctor about this and she concluded that it was likely an extreme manic episode (as I'm Bipolar), in addition to being a probable side-effect of the various medications I was on at that time and of course having insomnia. Still, that whole experience haunts me but I don't consider it a dream but it actually happening. Haven't had another one like it.

[Nikkie85]

Honestly, I think some dreams can hold significance. Just my opinion though.

[MisterT]

I experienced an intense hallucination just as you described in my late teens. I was in bed but still awake. I remember a shadowy figure appearing before me, leaning over me and its arms reaching for my throat. I felt nothing but I was so frightened I couldn't move or scream no matter how much I tried. I consulted my doctor about this and she concluded that it was likely an extreme manic episode (as I'm Bipolar), in addition to being a probable side-effect of the various medications I was on at that time and of course having insomnia. Still, that whole experience haunts me but I don't consider it a dream but it actually happening. Haven't had another one like it.

I'm so heavily medicated to sleep that I have periods of sleep paralysis about twice a month. The worst part is having dreams while lucid, knowing they're dreams, knowing I can't move, and still trying to anyway.

I had my shoulder and elbow repaired about 7 years ago, and to do that I had a spinal block done (never again!); I found the inability to move my arm, or even feel it, to be so disturbing that I had to be sedated. I just can't stand the feeling of trying to move or speak and not being able to.

The worst part is the feeling of paranoia that goes along with sleep paralysis; I routinely feel as though someone is trying to open my bedroom window or is lifting my blankets off of me.

[bcguy]

A few things about this story.

My parents drank alcohol off and on in the 70s and in the 80s, mom was drinking more and more alcohol. she would often come home drunk from driving. Was jailed once and brought shadowy men into the house "dad was seperated from her". Honestly, I think the absence of my dad most day as a resteraunt manager and moms shift hours did not leave much time at all for both of them. The recession of the early 80s hit and it all came to a head. Mom asked my dad for divorse while shopping and he fought it. See, my dad is a loyal, honest, hard working person. Mom is to, but I think the alcohol had a huge play in it.

The alcohol is almost a devil in a bottle. My dad shortly after the separation, lost the family business and his job. Since the house we had was secured to the other business partner in exchange he pay the down payment for the loan, he got the house so now, we became renters in our own house!

Mom could not pay the increased rent in our own house, so we had to move out!

Sucks back then. Great property 3/4 acer with trees.

Anyway, I think you are doing the right thing. She will not change. My mom, who I though was cured, got drunk one night with us and came home and broke her leg from falling down on 2 steps!

Now as for dreams. I am a prolific dreamer since the age of two. My dreams can be increasingly lucid "I talk to the people and they talk back to me" or just downright bizarre and weird!

Only had one dream come true. mom was crying her her dream saying she was fired. She called the other day she was fired from her 20 years on as a nurse, but was hired the next day in a different department.

next :)