I'm Comin' Back to Church. You have Been Warned.

[unixknight]

Hello all,

Please forgive the length of this post. I'm in that frame of mind right now that people often get into when they're making big changes in their life emotionally and/or spiritually and so there are a lot of thoughts to express. This is only a part.

My wife and I have been away from church for a couple of years now. It isn't that we've lost our faith or testimony, but rather that we'd lost our enthusiasm. Over that time we've lived according to the Gospel in a wildly varying degree, sometimes doing a prety good job and sometimes doing about as bad a job as it is humanly possible to short of going out and committing a train robbery.

Recently, we've talked about getting back into the proper path spiritually and resuming our church life, but in the course of our conversation, a lot of meditation, a good bit of prayer and a LOT of soul searching, we think we've reached the root of the problem. From here onward in this post I'll speak from my own personal perspective, but it covers us both.

I live in a mid-atlantic state where the LDS population is relatively low so most of the influences in my life have been from sources outside the Church. I was raised Catholic so I grew up with a good, firm grounding in Christianity and the idea of organized Church, priesthood, etc. I converted to the LDS Church when I was 24 and never looked back.

I believe in the Church with my whole heart, my whole mind, and I trust my eternal soul to the truth of the Gospel.

The problem is that I'm a really bad example of a Mormon. I don't mean in terms of sinning (Not saying I'm not a sinner... I've got a few whoppers that'd curl your toenails. It's just that isn't where I'm going with this post.)

When I go to church, I look around at the people around me and I see a bunch of fine, honorable, respectable men and women, any of which I'd trust with my life. I respect them all, like most of them, love a few, and am comfortable with none.

I have this mental image of the ideal Mormon guy as a guy who spends much of his time working on his calling or something Church-related. He's there, on-time, for Sacrament meeting every single Sunday. He's at all the Stake Conference meetings that pertain to him. He hangs out after Church on Sunday to help out. He shows up at Baptisms. He's there whenever somebody needs help moving. He's a returned missionary. He's soft spoken, wears a tie to Church every Sunday, hardly ever watches TV and when he does it's usually to watch General Conference (Although he's probably at the Stake Center for that anyway). Every Monday night he's conducting Family Home Evening with his kids where they pray, sing, do activties and snack on ginger snaps or rice cakes.

That isn't me. I despise wearing a tie under any cicumstances. I don't even wear a tie on JOB INTERVIEWS and I'm a software developer. I wear button down shirts with the sleeves rolled up because I absolutely can't stand to have my sleeves down except when I'm wearing a jacket or coat outside. (Note: Attending the Temple is the obvious exception to this, although I haven't done that in a loooooong time.) I spend my weekends and free time working on various hobbies. I'm divorced and the 3 kids from that marriage come to visit me every other weekend and that time is spent watching movies together, playing video games, wargaming or just talking. My child from my current marriage is 2 years old and I play with her in the evening after I pick her up from daycare then after she goes to bed I immerse myself in my hobby of painting miniatures for my favorite wargames. I talk loudly, boisterously and I love to tell jokes and laugh. I've never been on a mission and I can't quote one single passage from the Book of Mormon from memory despite owning 3 quads which I've read cover to cover. I'm a former mechanic and picked up a few bad habits like cussing like a sailor when I'm angry during the time I worked in a shop. (That was before I went back to school at the age of 24 to get my Bachelor's Degree in Computer Science.)

Oh yeah, and I run a Dungeons & Dragons game every other week. We even have a website that I built and host whose domain name I recycled from what began as a website for our ward. ldsknights.org - Home

I'm NOT the guy you'd bring a non-member friend to meet to show them an example of a Churchmember.

Here's the problem. I look at that idealized concept of the perfect Mormon guy and I don't aspire to be like him. I realize that the guys at church aren't as perfectly squared away as I make it seem and that we all have problems, challenges, obstacles and shortcomings but some of the elements of my personality I do NOT regard as flaws even when the guys at church look at me funny because they don't know what to make of me. I'm not going to stop being a comedian. I'm not going to soften my voice when I'm in a good mood. I'm not going to give up wargaming or console gaming. I did throw away all the DVDs in my movie collection that had nudity because I didn't want anything in my home anymore that would embarrass me of the Savior knocked on the door, but I kept my movies that had violence or whatever else. (For example, I got rid of Conan the Barbarian because of the nudity, but I kept Conan the Destroyer because while violent, it didn't show nude bodies in it.)

So for the most part I feel like a stranger in a strange land when I go to Church.

I have noticed that the older members of the Church tend to be more mellow and easier to relax with, but I'm 36 years old. It's not yet time for me to be hanging out with the High Priests. When I sit among the Elders I feel like I have to switch personalities into being someone I'm not.

Elder's Quorum Prez: "Hey Brother J, we're getting together this Saturday morning for a Ward Potluck Breakfast. Would you and your family like to attend?"

Me: "Aw thanks, but no on Saturday I have a Tournament I've been planning to participate in for weeks."

Elder's Quorum Prez:"Really? What kind of Tournament? Chess?"

Me: "No, Warhammer 40K."

Elder's Quorum Prez:"What's that?"

Me: "Well, it's a wargame you play on a tabletop with miniatures and dice. The faction I play is a chapter of super-warriors known as the Black Templars Space Marines."

Elder's Quorum Prez:"Oh... so do you let your kids play?"

Me: "Oh yes. My oldest son has three different armies."

Elder's Quorum Prez: "Wow so you guys play games together?"

Me: "Oh yeah. And this Friday I have a Dungeons & Dragons game."

Elder's Quorum Prez (looking unnerved): "Well I need to go find Brother B. I'll see you later."

Me: "Alrighty. Take it easy..."

One more person who won't be inviting me over for dinner anytime soon.

Have you ever told a joke to a group of people who reacted as if they were afraid to laugh out loud? Happened to me once when I was helping on a move. I was afraid the joke I told was offensive so I went to my Bishop and told him the joke. He thought it was hilarious.

Heavenly Father has a sense of humor, guys.

I just... I can't go back to Church and be a regularly attending member if it means I have to change who I am. I can't and I won't. My Father in Heaven made me. I like to game, I like to laugh, I like to relax and be comfortable. I'm sick of feeling inferior and guilty for not being like the other guys.

I know there's no expectation from Church leadership for people to be a certain way in their personality, and I don't mean to give the impression that I'm criticizing the LDS Church. I don't mean to do that at all. I do think there's a certain amount of bug-up-the-backsidedness in church culture though. I have a good friend, a very honorable, honest and fine man, who is single because he isn't a returned missionary and none of the women in the area where he lives will go out with him because of it. I find that absolutely ridiculous. If he were to lose his testimony because of feeling like an outcast then I blame that culture and I think it needs to be addressed.

So I'm going to get back into the habit of attending church regularly, I'm going to get back my Temple Recommend in time, and I'm going to raise my kids to be able to find their testimony too.

I will not teach my daughters to treat non-returned missionaries like lepers.

I will not stop gaming with my kids and my friends.

I will not stop telling jokes.

I will not start rolling my sleeves down.

I will live righteously and faithfully in accordance with the will of my Heavenly Father, because He gave me the personality and talents I possess and I won't ignore them simply because my fellow members of the Elders' Quorum think my jokes are weird or can't tell a Space Marine from a Crusader Tank*.

(If that last remark didn't make you smile, you may possibly be part of the problem, brother or sister reading this.)

This post has gone a bit long for which I apologize. If you've been kind enough to reach this line then I thank you and hope that I've said something that you'll find useful, thought-provoking or at least new.

*A Space Marine is an enhanced human in power armor who fights anywhere in the galaxy to defend humanity on behalf of the Emperor. A Crusader Tank is a troop transport armed with a variety of weapon systems designed to deploy Space Marines into the thick of the fighting rapidly.

[Backroads]

I enjoyed your post thoroughly.

[LDSChristian]

Awesome.

"short of going out and committing a train robbery. " This reminds me of westerns (old TV shows) :).

It's good to hear you're coming back to church.

Edited February 1, 2011 by Loudmouth_Mormon
unnecessary quoting entire OP

[JThimm88]

Loved reading your history. :) Also, my husband and I play D&D on Friday nights with a few other couples. I always thought it seemed nerdy until we got married, now I'm realizing it's actually kind of fun -- just takes a good imagination!

[rameumptom]

You know, the Church needs all kinds of people. The key is that we strive to keep the commandments of God. Beyond that, we are blessed by our diversity.

I currently am playing an 11th level Warmage in a game, and we have an alternating game starting up, where I'll play a 1st level changeling/rogue (Eberron campaign). I also play with my son, but he's 31 years of age! We attended Tracy Hickman's Killer Breakfast at GenCon in Indianapolis this past August. Yes, we died. But he gave us the task to find Bob (R.A.) Salvatore and tell him he died, also.

I'm a high priest, and have been on the high council. I was high priest group leader before that, and worked in Scouting over many of the past few years, as well. Some think I'm strange, but many have accepted me, because I strive to make them feel accepted and wanted by me. I think that is the key to it all. When your EQP invites you to something, accept when you can. When you can't, invite him to check out some of your activities. If he isn't interested, perhaps some others may be (I'm sure there are a few in the quorum who played DnD years ago).

There is room for all of this in our lives. We do not need to attend every single ward activity. Nor do we need to be best friends with everyone in the ward or quorum. We do need to serve them and make them feel important enough to want to return to Church. Perhaps such an attitude could have kept you and your wife active over the past few years.

Seek to make the world a better place, in context with the gospel and with the interests and hobbies you have. For example, my Gospel Doctrine lessons, both here and on my blog are getting tens of thousands of hits every year now.

Be active and be yourself!

[NeuroTypical]

Excellent post, unix.

I have this mental image of the ideal Mormon guy[...]

I had to chuckle. The stereotypical LDS guy. Interesting that we think we see so many of them, but it's really hard to find someone to stand up and say "yeah, I'm that guy!" I've been to maybe 3 baptisms or Stake Conference meetings in the last 5 years - one of them was my own daughter's baptism. Haven't really had FHE in a decade. And for some reason, someone thought it was a good idea to make me moderator of this forum.

I'm reminded of that funny southpark episode:

Stan: Why do you have to be so freakin' nice all the time - it isn't normal! You just weasel people into your way of thinking by acting like the happiest family in the world and being so nice to everyone that you just blindside dumb people like my dad!

Stan's Dad: Yeah! [slams door]

Brother Harrison: Well kids... [sad pause] Who's up for a WATER BALOON FIGHT?!!!

Harrison Family: YAY!!!

Work on the cussing, consider a short sleeve shirt, and you might be surprised how good active LDS life can be.

I'm NOT the guy you'd bring a non-member friend to meet to show them an example of a Churchmember.

I read your entire post, and I can't say I agree with you. What is the content of your heart? Are you a good person, or do you go about working acts of evil on purpose? I could give a wet slap what you look like or your mannerisms - do you believe in God and try to do what He wants you to do? Then why shouldn't we drag you around and show you to people? You say you want to raise your kids to find their testimony? Do you know how many of the shirt and tie guys at church don't really give that much thought?

So for the most part I feel like a stranger in a strange land when I go to Church.

...

Have you ever told a joke to a group of people who reacted as if they were afraid to laugh out loud?

As a representative of the concealed-carry handgun permit-holding mormons, welcome. On behalf of the borderline-reclusive introvert mormons, welcome. As someone who gets blank stares from his bishop and EQP every time he mentions being a moderator on an online LDS forum, welcome. If you shake my hand, you're shaking the hand of someone who didn't go on a mission, and dislikes much of LDS culture.

Welcome.

[bert10]

The people in the Church are not perfect. Wickedness is not based on Conformity regardless of today's mindset. The greatest problem of all Israel today is blaming, accusing and condemning. IF they do not gain a mind of Non-judgmental...they will be given judgments after judgments based on their own judgments on others until they learn to cease doing it or are dragged into the grave.

Just know that every minute spent in not making the kingdom of GOD first in our lives is a waste of precious time. However, we are not to judge others who decide to live differently. All of us will reap the consequences of our thoughts words and actions and I think this should be sufficient. Freedom is about choice whether it is wise or not.

bert10

Edited February 1, 2011 by Loudmouth_Mormon
unnecessary quoting entire OP

[bytor2112]

I just... I can't go back to Church and be a regularly attending member if it means I have to change who I am. I can't and I won't. My Father in Heaven made me. I like to game, I like to laugh, I like to relax and be comfortable. I'm sick of feeling inferior and guilty for not being like the other guys.

We all must change...that is after all what the Gospel is about....changing or rather becoming. I don't think that means one must become a jello eating clone....but one must become like Christ. Everyone has there own pace.....it's about direction...not velocity.

I am a bit of an oddity as well and I am the EQP. Living in the deep south, most of the guys in the ward are hunters. I hunt as well....little white balls. (golf) Most of em just don't get it, and I don't get killing unarmed furry critters. Oh well......

Edited February 1, 2011 by bytor2112

[Guest mormonmusic]

I agree with the stick-up-the-buttedness you are talking about. I too like to kid around, although my Laugh ratios don't show it....I crack jokes all the time in my work as a teacher and its part of what makes my classes fun. I do the same in Church classes, but often, my jokes are met with silence from Church members.

And like you, I don't feel like I fit in all the time either.

If I was you, I'd work on the train robberies and being good, and hang on to all the things that are different about you. And I wouldn't let these cultural norms that plague us make you feel out of place. Be yourself -- really yourself, but fix up any lack of virtue that bothers your conscience that is related to character, but not style.

You sound like the kind of guy I'd like to have in my Ward for a new sense of perspective and relief from the sometimes stifling non-doctrinal, non-gospel, non-essential-for-salvation norms we all seem to have to cling to to find acceptance.

[Guest mormonmusic]

If you shake my hand, you're shaking the hand of someone who didn't go on a mission, and dislikes much of LDS culture. Welcome.

Congratulations LM. I admire your ability to not let that part in bold show very much. I have the same tendencies and always seem to be biting my tongue in meetings.

[Backroads]

Weirdly enough... I love LDS culture. I like the perkiness (then again, I have the personality for a cheer leader if not the physical talent), I like the sharing and giving, I like the high expectations. But it all needs to be taken in perspective.

I've known Mormons of all sorts. I found out an old school chum is still very much Goth and very much Mormon.

I think it's about sticking true to what's important and letting personality shine.

As for missionaries... I've chased quite a few admirable guys who never went for one reason or another. My view of missionaries is that I only have issues with those who didn't go because it would be "boring".

[Blackmarch]

Hello all,

Please forgive the length of this post. I'm in that frame of mind right now that people often get into when they're making big changes in their life emotionally and/or spiritually and so there are a lot of thoughts to express. This is only a part.

My wife and I have been away from church for a couple of years now. It isn't that we've lost our faith or testimony, but rather that we'd lost our enthusiasm. Over that time we've lived according to the Gospel in a wildly varying degree, sometimes doing a prety good job and sometimes doing about as bad a job as it is humanly possible to short of going out and committing a train robbery.

Recently, we've talked about getting back into the proper path spiritually and resuming our church life, but in the course of our conversation, a lot of meditation, a good bit of prayer and a LOT of soul searching, we think we've reached the root of the problem. From here onward in this post I'll speak from my own personal perspective, but it covers us both.

I live in a mid-atlantic state where the LDS population is relatively low so most of the influences in my life have been from sources outside the Church. I was raised Catholic so I grew up with a good, firm grounding in Christianity and the idea of organized Church, priesthood, etc. I converted to the LDS Church when I was 24 and never looked back.

I believe in the Church with my whole heart, my whole mind, and I trust my eternal soul to the truth of the Gospel.

The problem is that I'm a really bad example of a Mormon. I don't mean in terms of sinning (Not saying I'm not a sinner... I've got a few whoppers that'd curl your toenails. It's just that isn't where I'm going with this post.)

When I go to church, I look around at the people around me and I see a bunch of fine, honorable, respectable men and women, any of which I'd trust with my life. I respect them all, like most of them, love a few, and am comfortable with none.

I have this mental image of the ideal Mormon guy as a guy who spends much of his time working on his calling or something Church-related. He's there, on-time, for Sacrament meeting every single Sunday. He's at all the Stake Conference meetings that pertain to him. He hangs out after Church on Sunday to help out. He shows up at Baptisms. He's there whenever somebody needs help moving. He's a returned missionary. He's soft spoken, wears a tie to Church every Sunday, hardly ever watches TV and when he does it's usually to watch General Conference (Although he's probably at the Stake Center for that anyway). Every Monday night he's conducting Family Home Evening with his kids where they pray, sing, do activties and snack on ginger snaps or rice cakes.

That isn't me. I despise wearing a tie under any cicumstances. I don't even wear a tie on JOB INTERVIEWS and I'm a software developer. I wear button down shirts with the sleeves rolled up because I absolutely can't stand to have my sleeves down except when I'm wearing a jacket or coat outside. (Note: Attending the Temple is the obvious exception to this, although I haven't done that in a loooooong time.) I spend my weekends and free time working on various hobbies. I'm divorced and the 3 kids from that marriage come to visit me every other weekend and that time is spent watching movies together, playing video games, wargaming or just talking. My child from my current marriage is 2 years old and I play with her in the evening after I pick her up from daycare then after she goes to bed I immerse myself in my hobby of painting miniatures for my favorite wargames. I talk loudly, boisterously and I love to tell jokes and laugh. I've never been on a mission and I can't quote one single passage from the Book of Mormon from memory despite owning 3 quads which I've read cover to cover. I'm a former mechanic and picked up a few bad habits like cussing like a sailor when I'm angry during the time I worked in a shop. (That was before I went back to school at the age of 24 to get my Bachelor's Degree in Computer Science.)

Oh yeah, and I run a Dungeons & Dragons game every other week. We even have a website that I built and host whose domain name I recycled from what began as a website for our ward. ldsknights.org - Home

I'm NOT the guy you'd bring a non-member friend to meet to show them an example of a Churchmember.

Here's the problem. I look at that idealized concept of the perfect Mormon guy and I don't aspire to be like him. I realize that the guys at church aren't as perfectly squared away as I make it seem and that we all have problems, challenges, obstacles and shortcomings but some of the elements of my personality I do NOT regard as flaws even when the guys at church look at me funny because they don't know what to make of me. I'm not going to stop being a comedian. I'm not going to soften my voice when I'm in a good mood. I'm not going to give up wargaming or console gaming. I did throw away all the DVDs in my movie collection that had nudity because I didn't want anything in my home anymore that would embarrass me of the Savior knocked on the door, but I kept my movies that had violence or whatever else. (For example, I got rid of Conan the Barbarian because of the nudity, but I kept Conan the Destroyer because while violent, it didn't show nude bodies in it.)

So for the most part I feel like a stranger in a strange land when I go to Church.

I have noticed that the older members of the Church tend to be more mellow and easier to relax with, but I'm 36 years old. It's not yet time for me to be hanging out with the High Priests. When I sit among the Elders I feel like I have to switch personalities into being someone I'm not.

Elder's Quorum Prez: "Hey Brother J, we're getting together this Saturday morning for a Ward Potluck Breakfast. Would you and your family like to attend?"

Me: "Aw thanks, but no on Saturday I have a Tournament I've been planning to participate in for weeks."

Elder's Quorum Prez:"Really? What kind of Tournament? Chess?"

Me: "No, Warhammer 40K."

Elder's Quorum Prez:"What's that?"

Me: "Well, it's a wargame you play on a tabletop with miniatures and dice. The faction I play is a chapter of super-warriors known as the Black Templars Space Marines."

Elder's Quorum Prez:"Oh... so do you let your kids play?"

Me: "Oh yes. My oldest son has three different armies."

Elder's Quorum Prez: "Wow so you guys play games together?"

Me: "Oh yeah. And this Friday I have a Dungeons & Dragons game."

Elder's Quorum Prez (looking unnerved): "Well I need to go find Brother B. I'll see you later."

Me: "Alrighty. Take it easy..."

One more person who won't be inviting me over for dinner anytime soon.

Have you ever told a joke to a group of people who reacted as if they were afraid to laugh out loud? Happened to me once when I was helping on a move. I was afraid the joke I told was offensive so I went to my Bishop and told him the joke. He thought it was hilarious.

Heavenly Father has a sense of humor, guys.

I just... I can't go back to Church and be a regularly attending member if it means I have to change who I am. I can't and I won't. My Father in Heaven made me. I like to game, I like to laugh, I like to relax and be comfortable. I'm sick of feeling inferior and guilty for not being like the other guys.

I know there's no expectation from Church leadership for people to be a certain way in their personality, and I don't mean to give the impression that I'm criticizing the LDS Church. I don't mean to do that at all. I do think there's a certain amount of bug-up-the-backsidedness in church culture though. I have a good friend, a very honorable, honest and fine man, who is single because he isn't a returned missionary and none of the women in the area where he lives will go out with him because of it. I find that absolutely ridiculous. If he were to lose his testimony because of feeling like an outcast then I blame that culture and I think it needs to be addressed.

So I'm going to get back into the habit of attending church regularly, I'm going to get back my Temple Recommend in time, and I'm going to raise my kids to be able to find their testimony too.

I will not teach my daughters to treat non-returned missionaries like lepers.

I will not stop gaming with my kids and my friends.

I will not stop telling jokes.

I will not start rolling my sleeves down.

I will live righteously and faithfully in accordance with the will of my Heavenly Father, because He gave me the personality and talents I possess and I won't ignore them simply because my fellow members of the Elders' Quorum think my jokes are weird or can't tell a Space Marine from a Crusader Tank*.

(If that last remark didn't make you smile, you may possibly be part of the problem, brother or sister reading this.)

This post has gone a bit long for which I apologize. If you've been kind enough to reach this line then I thank you and hope that I've said something that you'll find useful, thought-provoking or at least new.

*A Space Marine is an enhanced human in power armor who fights anywhere in the galaxy to defend humanity on behalf of the Emperor. A Crusader Tank is a troop transport armed with a variety of weapon systems designed to deploy Space Marines into the thick of the fighting rapidly.

unfortunately or fortunately i do know enough to tell the difference between a crusader tank and space marine...

>.>

Welcome back and glad to have ya ^.^

[unixknight]

Thanks for the kind words, all. I think if you guys were in my ward I wouldn't have had these problems :)

[Madriglace]

At least there are those in the church who do know where you are coming from ... I have been raising, training and handling show dogs for 35 years ...try fitting that into a church conversation ..."You show dogs ... isn't that cute."

The main thing is to decide to willingly (key word here) bend your will to that of the Lord. We all need to look at our lives and decide if what we do and say and how we live is in line with the Savior ... if not why not and how do we fix it. The rest is just icing. If everyone were the same in church meetings how boring would that be???? When was the last time you got the giggles in sacrement meeting so bad you nearly choked? What was that statement that Robin Hood's side kick made in the movie when a little girl asked him if God painted him ... he said something like God loves his children in all their wondrous variety. If we do all we can the follow in the Masters footsteps ... he loves us as we are.

[bcguy]

Nice thing about the church is it is always a open door policy. Always welcome to come back. When I first attended, I felt awkward. I still at times do feel awkward, but what is most important is that all members and this includes the presidency, be friendly, compassionate, caring people to other members. Fastest way to make a member leave is be critical, judgmental, and ignore ie "don't say hi to a member in the ward or ignore them". We are all different in our personalities. This has shown its self in Meyers Briggs test.

BTW, I am a former and current mechanic ie, going on round two with a healthy dose of Information Technology training and experience in between my mechanics stints for my background. Perhaps we can talk about software development some time?

:)

[talisyn]

Welcome back. And you should play a real game like FFXI.

[unixknight]

BTW, I am a former and current mechanic ie, going on round two with a healthy dose of Information Technology training and experience in between my mechanics stints for my background. Perhaps we can talk about software development some time?

:)

Anytime! My specialty is web development using Java.

Welcome back. And you should play a real game like FFXI.

I dunno wasn't that the MMO?

My wife's about halfway through FFXIII now on our XBox360.

[FunkyTown]

Hey Unix!

Just some thoughts on this:

I play Warhammer 40K. In fact, I am going up to a Tempus Fugitives event in Northern England - That group was covered in last months White Dwarf .I have 'code' for this - I tell my girlfriend, a very sweet and stalwart girl in the gospel, that I'm 'Fixing my car'.

I think the reason people make you feel odd is because you're... Well... Odd. We tend to hang out with people who share our interests and, frankly, our nerdy interests aren't what the majority of basketball loving people in the ward like. That's cool.

Also, I should point out that I'm not an RM and I've certainly never been avoided for not being an RM in the dating department. Maybe your friend just needs to change his tactics?

[unixknight]

I play Warhammer 40K. In fact, I am going up to a Tempus Fugitives event in Northern England - That group was covered in last months White Dwarf .I have 'code' for this - I tell my girlfriend, a very sweet and stalwart girl in the gospel, that I'm 'Fixing my car'.

Hehe if you open up a White Dwarf form a couple years back, the big photo in the last section is one of a bunch of us at a Battle Bunker during an event one day. About half of our group (including my son) are LDS. (And they deal with the same issues I'm describing here.)

This is my youngest, and this picture was taken a couple days ago. She was looking at my old Space Marines Codex (It's prettymuch hers now) and fell asleep with it:

http://ldsknights.org/image/image_gallery?img_id=36920&t=1296745031997

(She likes all the different colors of Space Marine Power Armor.)

I bet some of the folks in my ward would be shocked.

Fellow Wardmember: "You let your daughter look at a rulebook for a game with such violent themes?"

Me: "Of course. How else is she going to win at the Tournament when she gets older?"

Fellow Wardmember: "..."

I think the reason people make you feel odd is because you're... Well... Odd. We tend to hang out with people who share our interests and, frankly, our nerdy interests aren't what the majority of basketball loving people in the ward like. That's cool.

That I'm used to. I learned to deal with it in a positive way when I was in school, at work, and so on. It's different at Church because there seems to be this idea that somehow being more Christ-like means being less like... well like me. As if since The Savior probably wouldn't play 40K then neither should anybody else, ideally.

(But if He did I bet He'd totally play Grey Knights.... Just sayin')

Also, I should point out that I'm not an RM and I've certainly never been avoided for not being an RM in the dating department. Maybe your friend just needs to change his tactics?

Maybe, but I think the area he's in is a big factor. Apparently it's much more rigid than it is around here.

Edited February 3, 2011 by unixknight

[Dravin]

Also, I should point out that I'm not an RM and I've certainly never been avoided for not being an RM in the dating department. Maybe your friend just needs to change his tactics?

Actually I heard through the grapevine that it happened once. June 23, 2007.

The Savior probably wouldn't play 40K then neither should anybody else, ideally.

Because you can so see him glued to the TV watching sports right? Or involved in sports team rivalry? Or reading Twilight?* People are weird, that's for sure.

* I'm not even sure I can picture Satan reading twilight...

Edited February 3, 2011 by Dravin

[unixknight]

Or reading Twilight?* People are weird, that's for sure.

* I'm not even sure I can picture Satan reading twilight...

The irony in that being that the author is LDS...

[Dravin]

The irony in that being that the author is LDS...

I just picture Satan going on and on in a rant about sparkly vampires. I mean traditionally vampires are evil creatures and would be nominally his creations. :)

Edited February 3, 2011 by Dravin

[talisyn]

The author of Twilight is far wiser than any of us could guess ^^

[unixknight]

The author of Twilight is far wiser than any of us could guess ^^

Elaborate, please?

[Dravin]

Elaborate, please?

I think she's suggesting she's wise for being a disturber of Satan.