My Daughter Streched the Truth...


slamjet
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...saying "mom said it was ok for you to unblock a site for today." When it really should have been "mom said LAST NIGHT a site was blocked and we don't know when it will be unblocked." This, after her mom and me talked today and agreed to block the site until tomorrow morning. She has been known to stretch and manipulate to get her way but today I followed through with a threat none of my kids thought I could do. I locked out her computer from the internet. Now she's desperately trying to negotiate with mom and me to try to get the issue resolved so she can get the internet back.

Is it evil of me to be enjoying this?

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to be honest, coming from a 17 yr old girls perspective I don't think you were harsh enough. Taking away the internet? i don't see the big deal. She lied. She was dishonest so she could get what she wanted, and she's done it before. And, i realize you weren't exactly asking for advice...

but if you wanna be 'evil and enjoy it' i'd go harsher. It seems like these days teens can't live without there cell phones ;)

(And, i think obviously what kind of website it was matters. I don't exactly get all that happened...)

just my 2 cents.

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...saying "mom said it was ok for you to unblock a site for today." When it really should have been "mom said LAST NIGHT a site was blocked and we don't know when it will be unblocked." This, after her mom and me talked today and agreed to block the site until tomorrow morning. She has been known to stretch and manipulate to get her way but today I followed through with a threat none of my kids thought I could do. I locked out her computer from the internet. Now she's desperately trying to negotiate with mom and me to try to get the issue resolved so she can get the internet back.

Is it evil of me to be enjoying this?

Should kids even have computers?

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Oh... My... Word... Don't ever underestimate the resolve of a 14 year old.

She won this battle! She talked to Mom, who called me and when we discussed the timeline, it comes out it was a misunderstanding between mom and me. So mom and I talked about it, came up with how not to have this mix up again:

- We discuss the problem at hand and come up with a plan of action.

- Computer enforcement is my job.

- If the kids have a question about it, she will say "talk to your father."

- I will go with the last conversation I had with mom and stick with what we decided.

- If there are any changes to be made, we call each other and decide if, how and when to do it.

I still think there was a bit of manipulation but with my mix up with mom, we couldn't punish her for that. So she got internet back, minus the blocked site until tomorrow (as was previously decided). But one good thing that came out of all this; they now know I have the power to enforce from over 1600 miles away. :D

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(And, i think obviously what kind of website it was matters. I don't exactly get all that happened...)

IM is forbidden except amongst each other. My 10 yo got caught chatting with a stranger. so I blocked that site (happens to be the family favorite) until he gets it. We'll try it out for a day but one more infraction and it's a permanent block.

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EDIT: Dang... I wish Mom would have backed you up regardless of the misunderstanding.

Oh no! Don't misunderstand me, it was the both of us that got all mixed up. We get along very well and we are 98% of the like mind with the kids. It's just the timeline of events got jumbled and I didn't double-check. Now we have it where I don't need to double-check because once we make the decision, that's it.

She wants me to deal with the computer enforcement because she doesn't understand most of it, and she doesn't have the time to constantly keep up with every little computer issue that comes up. So she asked me to take it over, which I happily agreed.

So now when things get blocked, they see one of these messages:

Your father blocked this category. [DOMAIN] is not allowed on this network.

Why are you even trying to see bad stuff?

or

Sorry, [DOMAIN] has been blocked by your Father.

Because you annoyed your Mother way to much with the screaming,

silly life-or-death attitude or you were chatting.

Opendns.org, wonderful tool to have. As well as knowing how to use the router to block access.

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Oh no! Don't misunderstand me, it was the both of us that got all mixed up. We get along very well and we are 98% of the like mind with the kids. It's just the timeline of events got jumbled and I didn't double-check. Now we have it where I don't need to double-check because once we make the decision, that's it.

She wants me to deal with the computer enforcement because she doesn't understand most of it, and she doesn't have the time to constantly keep up with every little computer issue that comes up. So she asked me to take it over, which I happily agreed.

So now when things get blocked, they see one of these messages:

or

Opendns.org, wonderful tool to have. As well as knowing how to use the router to block access.

I need a thank you and a laugh button.

I can't find the applauding hands. :(

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Guest Sachi001
...saying "mom said it was ok for you to unblock a site for today." When it really should have been "mom said LAST NIGHT a site was blocked and we don't know when it will be unblocked." This, after her mom and me talked today and agreed to block the site until tomorrow morning. She has been known to stretch and manipulate to get her way but today I followed through with a threat none of my kids thought I could do. I locked out her computer from the internet. Now she's desperately trying to negotiate with mom and me to try to get the issue resolved so she can get the internet back.

Is it evil of me to be enjoying this?[/QUOTE]

As a dad with 2 daughters and went through similar before. I say nope! In fact revel in it with smugness.

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4-girls, 1 boy. And my oldest (who is home from college) started in about how she feels like such a child because she is blocked from her favorite site. I laughed so hard I was in tears! But I did help her do the unblocking thing because she is an "adult" and mom asked me to.

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I think it's fantastic that you and your ex-wife are on such good terms that you can trust each other like that. Kudos to you both!

Thanks. You wouldn't believe the people who don't believe us when we tell them we're amicable. We decided there was no need to fight and it's been pretty even keeled since then. Yea, I hurt and lost an awesome person.

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