Not mad. Just a tad frustrated!

[slamjet]

My son had two friends over last night. They, along with DH devoured the chili. I couldn't eat my bowlful. I asked my son how he liked the chili. He says he liked the thickness of it better than my thinner chili. I guess in the future I need to thicken my chili a little more. It's a creation in progress. But, I won't be adding canned meat chunks to it.

So, describe the smug look on your DH after that one

[Palerider]

if you can't say something nice..don't say anything at all.

nope

[pam]

nope

How did I know?

[Palerider]

How did I know?

I give up....you tell me:)

[pam]

13 years I've known you on this site and you still haven't learned manners.

[Palerider]

13 years i've known you on this site and you still haven't learned manners.

lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[applepansy]

Sunday morning 7:30 a.m. and I have to wipe down counters before fixing breakfast for grandson. Church starts at 9:00 a.m. The bread is awesome. The chicken soup with homemade noodles was good. He even did more on tiling the bathroom. (I was at the Genealogy Conference all day yesterday.)

Sigh

I'm so tried and ...oops... well tried works too but I mean tired.

I know. I know! I shouldn't be complaining.

[Traveler]

I'm making homemade crockpot chili tonight for dinner. After I browned the hamburger and onions, (along with all the seasonings), I heard the timer on the dryer. Knowing I had shirts in the dryer that needed to be taken out immediately so they wouldn't get wrinkled, I asked my husband if he wouldn't mind putting in the cans of tomatoes I had sitting out, into the beans in the crockpot, along with the browned hamburger concoction. I suggested, if he wanted, he could cut up a fresh tomato and put into the chili also. I go downstairs and fold the batch of laundry and start a new batch in the washer. I come up stairs and look at my chili. It looks disgusting--like puke. I ask, "what did you do to my chili?" DH just laughs, and tells me he added a can of turkey chunks, and a can of beef chunks along with all the other ingredients I had told him to put in.

I admit, I was upset. I felt like he ruined my chili. DH loves to experiment. I know what I like, and I've worked on my homemade chili recipe to get it to where I like it. I'm trying to decide why I got upset. The chili isn't ruined. It tastes okay, though not the way I like it. And to me it doesn't look appetizing. Why would something so minor upset me like it did?

Thank you for this post - I believe it shows the essence of something very difficult in us all or at least in most of us. That is when we think we are in charge we want it done exactly our way - we really do not what to delegate. The classic term is called micro-managing.

This is one of the great things I so admire about my wife - her skills in delegating and not micro-managing. She has a way of committing others to tasks and convincing them that they are in charge and control - as well as responsible. Not so much for her to hold them to account but that they buy into what ever is going on.

She is also expert in praising them for getting the job done and taking no credit to herself. The result is that she seem to have a mystery about her in getting anything accomplished with hardly any effort that everybody else struggles endlessly with and cannot seem to get done right.

The Traveler

[applepansy]

Thank you for this post - I believe it shows the essence of something very difficult in us all or at least in most of us. That is when we think we are in charge we want it done exactly our way - we really do not what to delegate. The classic term is called micro-managing.

This is one of the great things I so admire about my wife - her skills in delegating and not micro-managing. She has a way of committing others to tasks and convincing them that they are in charge and control - as well as responsible. Not so much for her to hold them to account but that they buy into what ever is going on.

She is also expert in praising them for getting the job done and taking no credit to herself. The result is that she seem to have a mystery about her in getting anything accomplished with hardly any effort that everybody else struggles endlessly with and cannot seem to get done right.

The Traveler

Does she give classes?

[Echo2002]

Meat chunks just sounds awful.

[FunkyTown]

What your husband did upset you because it just didn't take in to account your feelings: You had set your mind to something and were looking forward to a slow cooked chili. Everything was perfect, and then your husband came along and ignored all the hard work you did. It felt disrespectful.

That makes total sense, and is okay.

But:

You took a guy and handed him a crock pot full of chili, then asked if he could help prepare it. Regardless of the man's propensity to cook, there are a couple of things we can't resist putting our hand in. One is chili and the other is barbecue. I don't know your husband, but most guys would have gleefully leaped in to preparing chili. It's possible your husband likes to experiment so much that he'd have done the same thing to a cheesecake you were preparing - I don't know - But most guys would have gone crazy if handed the keys to a chili recipe.

Me, I'd have added some beef broth, fried up a few bird's eye chilis, added some cumin, thyme, cinnamon, accent seasoning and honey to counteract the bitterness of the non-alcoholic beer.

[MorningStar]

Suddenly wondered if he would put canned meat on cheesecake. Nearly vomited.

[Traveler]

Does she give classes?

Even better - she gives herself.

The Traveler

[applepansy]

Even better - she gives herself.

The Traveler

That's wonderful but I don't live next door.

All silliness aside. I admire people like your wife. I continually try to develop those qualities. I'm failing miserably.

[EarlJibbs]

I would think that adding turkey chunks, and a can of beef chunks would make anything better. I am with your husband on this one. :)

But really I am on your side. You should have been upset. You worked hard on that. When he is making the dinner, he can go and add whatever he wants.

[Dravin]

Suddenly wondered if he would put canned meat on cheesecake. Nearly vomited.

One would want to make it a savory cheese cake, but I can see that working. An example of a savory cheese cake: Savory Appetizer Cheesecake Recipe | Taste of Home Recipes

[classylady]

I don't know, a bacon (or any other meat) cheesecake just sounds wrong!

Edited September 17, 2012 by classylady

[applepansy]

One would want to make it a savory cheese cake, but I can see that working. An example of a savory cheese cake: Savory Appetizer Cheesecake Recipe | Taste of Home Recipes

That recipe sounds yummy served with some awesome crackers.

[classylady]

One would want to make it a savory cheese cake, but I can see that working. An example of a savory cheese cake: Savory Appetizer Cheesecake Recipe | Taste of Home Recipes

My DH would probably love this.

[Wingnut]

Maple bacon would be an easy way to make a sweet cheesecake with bacon work. I'm not a fan of maple bacon stuff that I've tried, though.

Also, this: Mexican Cheesecake Appetizer Dip Recipe | Recipe Girl

[MorningStar]

One would want to make it a savory cheese cake, but I can see that working. An example of a savory cheese cake: Savory Appetizer Cheesecake Recipe | Taste of Home Recipes

That actually sounds really good.

[ClickyClack]

I admit, I was upset. I felt like he ruined my chili. DH loves to experiment. I know what I like, and I've worked on my homemade chili recipe to get it to where I like it. I'm trying to decide why I got upset. The chili isn't ruined. It tastes okay, though not the way I like it. And to me it doesn't look appetizing. Why would something so minor upset me like it did?

Because you invested a lot of time and effort into getting exactly what you wanted, and your husband came along and screwed it all up.

Take a project of his, and ask him what he would do if you changed it. Say, if he likes to work on cars, ask how he'd feel if you went and painted a big red heart on his hood.