Dr T Posted June 27, 2012 Author Report Posted June 27, 2012 What kind of flower buys father's day cards? A SUNFLOWER! Quote
Jamie123 Posted June 27, 2012 Report Posted June 27, 2012 What kind of flower buys father's day cards?A SUNFLOWER!It took me a moment to get that one!(Complicated stuff!) Quote
Guest jollyroger Posted June 27, 2012 Report Posted June 27, 2012 What do you call a dinosaur that likes to play hide and seek? Doyouthinkhesaurus? HAHAHAHA! I've been laughing at that one for over 10 years! Quote
Jamie123 Posted June 27, 2012 Report Posted June 27, 2012 (edited) How do you fit four elephants in a Mini?Two in the front, two in the back.How do you know if an elephant's been in your fridge?Footprints in the butter.How do you know if two elephants have been in your fridge?Two sets of footprints in the butter.How do you know if three elephants have been in your fridge?Three sets of footprints in the butter.How do you know if four elephants have been in your fridge?There's a Mini parked outside. Edited June 27, 2012 by Jamie123 Quote
Jamie123 Posted June 27, 2012 Report Posted June 27, 2012 And on the subject of fridges.....What's white and kills you when it falls out of a tree?A fridge.What's white and stands in the corner?A naughty fridge.What's white and wears check trousers?Rupert the FridgeWhat's white and blue and can't climb trees?A fridge wearing a denim jacket.Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?Someone threw a fridge at it.Why did the elephant fall out of the tree?It was sellotaped to the monkey.What's white and bangs at the end of the garden.A fridge making a rabbit hutch. Quote
Jamie123 Posted June 27, 2012 Report Posted June 27, 2012 One more.....Why is an elephant like an orange?Neither can drive a tractor. Quote
Dr T Posted July 7, 2012 Author Report Posted July 7, 2012 What did the artist name his son?DREW Quote
Dr T Posted July 11, 2012 Author Report Posted July 11, 2012 What does a piece of fruit sleep on? APRI-COTS Quote
Dr T Posted July 18, 2012 Author Report Posted July 18, 2012 What animal unlocked the farm gate? The Tur-Key or wait, was it the Don-Key? Quote
RipplecutBuddha Posted July 18, 2012 Report Posted July 18, 2012 What do a frog and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars....except for the frog. Quote
Dr T Posted July 21, 2012 Author Report Posted July 21, 2012 What is a calendars favorite music? MARCH Quote
Dr T Posted July 23, 2012 Author Report Posted July 23, 2012 What position does a cat play in baseball? CAT-CHER! Quote
Dr T Posted July 24, 2012 Author Report Posted July 24, 2012 What kind of flowers give the best kisses? Tulips! Quote
kevmatt78 Posted July 24, 2012 Report Posted July 24, 2012 how do you catch a unique rabbit? unique up on it how do you catch a tame rabbit? the tame way Quote
pam Posted July 24, 2012 Report Posted July 24, 2012 Seriously where is the "boo and hiss" button on this forum. :) Quote
Dr T Posted July 27, 2012 Author Report Posted July 27, 2012 I loved that one! It is perfect for this thread Quote
Eleven Posted July 27, 2012 Report Posted July 27, 2012 What do you call a nosy pepper? Jalapeno bid'ness Quote
Vort Posted July 27, 2012 Report Posted July 27, 2012 A rope went into a bar. The bartender said, "We don't serve your kind here." The rope went into another bar. The bartender there said, "No ropes -- get out." So the rope tied itself into a bowline and loosened up its end fibers. Then it walked into another bar. The bartender looked at it and said, "Say, aren't you a rope?' The rope replied, "I'm a frayed knot." Quote
Eleven Posted July 27, 2012 Report Posted July 27, 2012 Hope this one isn't off key lol, but me and my family would always laugh at this one with the kids: Three cowboys were chased and captured by a pack of Indians. They were all tied to a tree, and were given the choice of torture and release or certain death. All three chose torture. The first cowboy was taken back by himself and asked what his favorite fruit was. He said Apples. His torture was that he must stick 5 apples in his bum or they would kill him. he managed one and was killed after giving up. As the first cowboy waited in heaven for his other pals, the second cowboy shot up into heaven laughing like he never had before. The first cowboy asked "aw shoot, they got you too?!" the second nodded, but was still crying from laughter. "Whats so funny?! We both just got killed!" The second cowboy reported that the Third had chosen Pineapples. Quote
unixknight Posted July 27, 2012 Report Posted July 27, 2012 A cannibal walks down the street and passes his brother. Quote
Guest Posted July 27, 2012 Report Posted July 27, 2012 Funny, but I wouldn't tell that joke to my kids. Quote
Dr T Posted July 28, 2012 Author Report Posted July 28, 2012 Where did the baseball kep its lemonade? In the PITCHER Quote
Rapidmc Posted July 29, 2012 Report Posted July 29, 2012 A man walks into a bar... ...and says ouch. A skeleton walks into a bar and says give me a beer and a mop. Quote
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