Terrified of baptism

[Phoenix7093]

I've been reading the book of Mormon for about a year and a half now and I feel like I've hit a brick wall. I have had input from many missionaries (have met only 2 but really felt more intimidated by them than anything and felt it pushed me back a step) but my main sticking point is baptism. The thing I want most in the world is to be baptised and receive the gift of the Holy ghost but I am absolutely filled with fear about the baptism ceremony itself. I have no fears of the commitment, the change in my life or anything else that comes with it. I cannot get over my fear of the ceremony. Not because I'm scared of water or anything as rational as that.... I'm scared to be in front of anyone, scared that I will look stupid, scared that they won't be able to manage to dip me under the water, that I'll fall over, so many irrational feelings but I can't overcome them. I can't make my faith bigger than my fear. I'm scared for the way I'll look, I'm scared of the Church part on Sunday that follows as that will be in front of everybody. I feel I've failed before I've even received the gift. ☹️

The worst part is, I know everything I feel is irrational and is easy to overcome but I can't do it. My anxiety is crazy even just at the thought. I want to do it so badly but I feel ill never make it. 

[Jane_Doe]

Honestly, my first instinct is that you only need 3 people + yourself for baptism, so just pick 3 friends who've seen you fall on your face so many times another time won't remotely matter (--written by a klutz).  And if things take an hour because you can't stop sticking your foot out of the water, or just need the time for breathing space, that's ok.  Your friends love you.  Let them be there and support you.  Even through irrational fears of a ceremony or looking dumb -- let them be by you. 

On slightly different note: Christ is/will be with you.  He does not fail.  

[Grunt]

23 hours ago, Phoenix7093 said:

I've been reading the book of Mormon for about a year and a half now and I feel like I've hit a brick wall. I have had input from many missionaries (have met only 2 but really felt more intimidated by them than anything and felt it pushed me back a step) but my main sticking point is baptism. The thing I want most in the world is to be baptised and receive the gift of the Holy ghost but I am absolutely filled with fear about the baptism ceremony itself. I have no fears of the commitment, the change in my life or anything else that comes with it. I cannot get over my fear of the ceremony. Not because I'm scared of water or anything as rational as that.... I'm scared to be in front of anyone, scared that I will look stupid, scared that they won't be able to manage to dip me under the water, that I'll fall over, so many irrational feelings but I can't overcome them. I can't make my faith bigger than my fear. I'm scared for the way I'll look, I'm scared of the Church part on Sunday that follows as that will be in front of everybody. I feel I've failed before I've even received the gift. ☹️

The worst part is, I know everything I feel is irrational and is easy to overcome but I can't do it. My anxiety is crazy even just at the thought. I want to do it so badly but I feel ill never make it. 

That's funny (not funny ha ha but funny odd).  My wife had the exact same issue.  In the end, she opted for a ceremony with just myself baptizing her and 2 witnesses.  

[Phoenix7093]

So........ I did it! About a month ago, I managed to finally go through with it. There were a few bumps along the way but in the end it was all planned, lessons completed, baptism interview conducted and baptised within 24 hours! It was really special and I only had the sisters, the stake president and my best friend (who actually baptised me) in his back garden hottub due to covid restrictions! I had to get approvals from the missionary president from the local area and a Bishop in Arizona (due to my friend being based there currently, but was home in the UK at the time) so you could say it was a very multinational affair! 

As I suspected all along, I can now say that it was the best thing I ever did, altho not sure I could pluck up the courage again! Haha 

Its amazing to now be an official member of the Church. It really feels like I'm home. 

 

[Jane_Doe]

16 minutes ago, Phoenix7093 said:

So........ I did it! About a month ago, I managed to finally go through with it. There were a few bumps along the way but in the end it was all planned, lessons completed, baptism interview conducted and baptised within 24 hours! It was really special and I only had the sisters, the stake president and my best friend (who actually baptised me) in his back garden hottub due to covid restrictions! I had to get approvals from the missionary president from the local area and a Bishop in Arizona (due to my friend being based there currently, but was home in the UK at the time) so you could say it was a very multinational affair! 

As I suspected all along, I can now say that it was the best thing I ever did, altho not sure I could pluck up the courage again! Haha 

Its amazing to now be an official member of the Church. It really feels like I'm home. 

 

Woot woot!!!  All around!

[Midwest LDS]

13 hours ago, Phoenix7093 said:

So........ I did it! About a month ago, I managed to finally go through with it. There were a few bumps along the way but in the end it was all planned, lessons completed, baptism interview conducted and baptised within 24 hours! It was really special and I only had the sisters, the stake president and my best friend (who actually baptised me) in his back garden hottub due to covid restrictions! I had to get approvals from the missionary president from the local area and a Bishop in Arizona (due to my friend being based there currently, but was home in the UK at the time) so you could say it was a very multinational affair! 

As I suspected all along, I can now say that it was the best thing I ever did, altho not sure I could pluck up the courage again! Haha 

Its amazing to now be an official member of the Church. It really feels like I'm home. 

 

Welcome to the Church we are super excited to have you!