Tarnished

Here is how I see it. When I first got to college I was 5' 7" and 125 lbs, but I got next to no dates. I was skinny and I was pretty, but I was also shy. Near the end of the year I began to get desperate for a date of any kind, I began to ask out guys on my own. Then the man who became my husband asked me out and from him I learned something. Sometimes the really gorgeous girls are intimidating to guys, the guy sees a girl and thinks, "Oh, she is way out of my league, I could never get a date with her." and so they don't ask. Conversely a guy may have this "ideal woman" in his mind and just can't get his head around asking out a girl who doesn't fit that ideal. I think the real key is trying to be a little more outgoing. Try to get to a place where you are happy with your life and with yourself. When a person is truly happy it shows and others tend to want to be around them. I often heard when I was single that you often end up meeting someone when you aren't even looking. So to answer your question, do you have to be skinny to find a guy? For some guys yes, but for others no. Do you have to be skinny to find an eternal companion? No.

I have never heard the whole 2 Gods concept, but I can see how it could be interpreted that way. God in the OT seems to act much differently than God in the NT. What some people probably don't understand is that though they seem to act differently they are the same God. It is my belief that we see a different side of things in the OT because there were many revisions over the years and much of how God acts is due to faulty translations and revisions. Much like when Moses asks Pharoh to let the Israelites go, in the Bible it says that God hardened Pharoh's heart, but if we read the Joseph Smith translation we see that Pharoh hardened his own heart.

That is hilarious!!

Now this I know my husband would object to. He has this idea that boys must be dressed as boys and girls as girls. When he was a little baby just home from the hospital his sisters painted his nails and his dad made them take it off. I think he has fears that I will paint the nails of any boy we have. LOL. I think he would have a conniption fit if I dressed one of our little boys in pink or in a dress. Maybe little kilts though, he has no problem with kilts.

Yea, I make it sound better than it is. I actually drop the baby topic on my hubby while we are in the car driving somewhere, usually when we are making the two hour drive to visit my parents. Otherwise I know he wouldn't talk to me about it as getting the "baby stuff" doesn't interest him right now. His view is that once we find out what we are having then we can focus on what to get. But there are many things that can be purchased before finding out the gender. Such as the car seat and stroller. But yes, it is nice to get some advice for us first timers, so often with this pregnancy I feel like I am blind and fumbling around to figure out what is going on.

This is what we are talking about.

I agree with JohnDoe here. Earlier this year someone complained to HR about the swearing that went on in my husband's workplace. Now granted their worksite tends to get tours coming through often because the company likes to show off their new data center. So it could have come from someone who came through. The result though was that the swearing had to take a steep decline. My husband said it was interesting to see because his manager tends to use the "f word" every other word, and he said it was interesting to watch his manager try to speak without cussing. Speak to the person who does all the swearing, if that doesn't work then go to your manager, and if that doesn't work then go to HR.

Ooooh, great idea!! Hehehe, I think I know what I am getting for Christmas this year! Which actually makes it easier, I have such a hard time figuring out what to ask for when Christmas comes around.

January 28th, 2011. Our attempt with In Vetro worked!

I have realtives that I can borrow things from. My sister's baby will be turning two (I think) this year, and my sister in law just had a baby in April of this year. She and my brother are staying the Summer with my parents while my brother decides on where to go for graduate school. By the time they leave their baby will be a few months old and they may end up leaving some things behind. My mom has actually bought a crib for their house so that when their infant grandkids come by they have a place to sleep. I am seriously considering convertable items, like convertable carseat, convertable stroller and convertable crib. I figure if those things can last into toddlerhood then they will be worth the extra money spent on them. I am planning on setting up a money fund for relatives and friends who want to give a gift but don't want to go out and buy something and use that fund for buying the big money items like car seat, stroller and crib. I appreciate the recommendations because it helps me make up my mind when I am thinking through everything.

January 28, 2011

I kind of want to pump and have milk for all sorts of situations. If the baby is willing to take breastmilk from the bottle then I think I can give the middle of the night feedings to my hubby. He works second shift, getting home at Midnight and often suffers from insomnia, staying awake till 2 am or sometimes even 5 or 6 am. I figure if he is up when we have the baby and we have milk available then he can take care of middle of the night feedings. So in that case I would need milk available for every night, we also plan to move close to my parents so it would also be nice to have some on hand for if we leave the little one with Nana and Grandpa.

As I mentioned in another post looking through the list of things that are needed for an upcoming baby can be overwhelming, especially when you think about the cost involved. It makes me want to spread out the damage to our finances. Which brings me to my question: What are your thoughts on when is the best time to purchase things? Stuff like car seats, cribs, strollers, bottles, burp rags, diapers, etc. I am currently still in my first trimester, I will be hitting week 11 this Saturday which means I am almost to my second trimester. What things did you find best to buy during which trimester? Which things did you buy after the baby was born? What did you wish you had bought earlier? My sister mentioned beginning to buy diapers early on, and sort of stockpile them (this is if we choose to go with disposable, I am still going back and forth on the cloth vs disposable), then when you have the baby you have diapers already. She also mentioned getting extra diapers each time you have to go out and buy some, just so that the diapers last longer. Thoughts, recommendations?

Thanks! This is all great information! I had forgotten that I had access to all this great info until Lizzy started making her posts. I will probably make another thread about cribs. I started looking at a list of essential things to buy with a baby coming and was almost overwhelmed with everything and the estimated cost for it all. There is a site I ran into which calculates how much it would cost per year for your baby, it has different things you can check and uncheck which lower or raise the estimated cost. Daycare was the biggest surprise for me, it can really add up over a year. I will have to see if I can find that site again and post a link. I thought it was very interesting. Back to the amount of stuff needed and the amount of things you have to think about, I really appreciate the fact that I can ask people what their experience has been and get answers about things I currently have no clue about. What are people's thoughts about when to purchase items? Maybe I should make a new post for that question, I know sometimes people only read the OP and don't read follow up questions.

I didn't even think about freezing the milk! My husband and I were discussing it and I figured we would have to just use the pumped milk really quick but freezing it is a great idea. And a good way to have bottles on hand when needed. How did you unfreeze the bottles when you used them? Would for example a microwave work for defrosting or should you let them thaw in the fridge?

I am planning on becoming a stay at home mom. I am currently working though and we are in the middle of trying to move from one town to another 2 hours away. So I am hoping that I will be able to make it to SAHM status before or by the time the baby arrives. I have heard that pumping can also help women produce more milk if they are having problems producing. I read that the best way to do this is to let the baby feed and then after feeding pump. Is that true? My sister breastfed and said that it helped her, but my sister in law has been using formula and breastfeeding now and then because her milk doesn't seem to be coming in very strong. Could this be because she is not breastfeeding as often and so her milk production is low?

Another question I had was regarding car seats and stollers. From what I have heard it is more cost effective to get a convertable car seat and stroller so that you don't have to purchase new ones as your child grows. I have read that safety standards have changed over the years so it may not be wise to get a car seat from a donation store such as Good Will or DI, this is because the car seat may not be up to safety standards and the clip and pieces of the car seat may be old and not as safe as they were when it was new. Does anyone have any thoughts on this, any experiences? Has anyone gotten a travel system (a car seat/baby carrier that you can use on stollers, in the car, and on shopping carts)? Has anyone had any experience with convertable car seats and strollers? Good, bad? Pros, cons?

So I thought I might get into the whole baby/pregnancy questioning. I am planning on breastfeeding when our baby comes and was wondering which works better or which worked better for you when it came to breast pumps, manual pump or electric pump? Pros and cons of both?

I have a question, how many other women work in your office (I am assuming here that you are a woman, forgive me if I am wrong), do they all swear as well? Maybe what you could do is speak to the main offender and tell him that his swearing really bothers you and ask him if he could tone it down, or at the very least quiet down as it disrupts your work. As for the whispering boss, there is a lady in our office who I eat lunch with and whenever she is talking about african americans she whispers the word black. It will be something like, "I was at the store and the man in front of me was black..." I think it is weird that she feels uncomfortable talking about people of different colors. I have many friends from different nationalities so I don't see much point in whispering their race or color.

I heard bubbler when I was in Idaho, for me it has always been a drinking fountain. But yes, I do remember the first time I heard it, I had asked someone where I could get some water and they told me that they had seen a bubbler around the corner. It took me awhile before I realized they were talking about the drinking fountain.

I like what crazypotato said about all of this. Every marriage is work, every marriage requires work, and in almost every marriage you get to a point where you don't find your spouse as attractive as you once did, the key is to fall back in love with your spouse over and over again. Like a few of the posters have said, focus on what is wonderful about your wife, stop focusing on looks, because let me tell you, time has a tendency to take looks away, both yours and your wifes. If you base your marriage solely on looks then even a hot supermodel wife will eventually lose her looks over time, and your marriage will fall apart because all you are focused on is looks. I agree that you should probably go speak with a counselor, and I would recommend an LDS counselor. Someone who can help you sort out your thoughts and feelings and can hopefully set you on the right path. Marriage will never be easy, but if you are willing to work at it marriage can be wonderful.

I remember being where you are though, because it was IVF I knew exactly what day the embryos were put in me, then I had to wait for two weeks to see if we had a positive pregnancy. About a week after we found out the answer was yes I started spotting. I seriously freaked out. Thankfully the spotting was light and stopped after one day, but it gave me a huge scare. My husband and I are afraid of doing much of anything for fear that it might hurt the baby in some way and cause a miscarriage. And the time does seem to pass so slowly during the 1st trimester, or at least it has for me. There were a few times during the time period when I was taking the progesterone where I used vaginal suppositories, I am not sure what the exact name for it was but I do know it was progesterone in some form. I only used those when my husband was not able to give me a shot due to being out of town. As much as I hated the shots I stuck with them because the doctor said that they got me more of the progesterone than the suppositories because they went straight into the muscle. It also made it less of a problem if you ended up missing a day because you still had progesterone stored in your muscle. I don't know what method of getting progesterone into you your doctor is taking. I hope that it works and that you and your husband have a safe and full term pregnancy. We have been trying for 10 years for a child so we know just how exciting and anxiety causing trying for a baby can be. Good luck, I will keep you in my prayers.

This whole thread is making me crave mac and cheese for supper tonight. And I am pretty sure I have a box at home. Thanks Beefche, this makes it easier for me to decide what to make for supper tonight. That last sentence reminds me of this question thing as well. Do people call it super or dinner?

When my brother was on his mission he started to go bald, the mission president shaved his head at the time and so my brother shaved his as well. Later his mission president saw him and asked him to regrow his hair, the next time the mission president saw him he told him to shave it again as it looked better and more "tidy" I guess when it was shaved. I agree with you that it really depends on the circumstances and how the hair style causes you to come across. Another "Neo-Nazi" example I have came from when my husband was going through cancer. It was right after his bone marrow transplant and so he was bald (with no eyebrows) and he had to wear a breathing mask (that did that whole Darth Vader breathing sound effect) and he liked to wear his long black leather trench coat because it was February. So one day we are walking into a Walmart and an african american woman is walking out with her kids, she took one look at him and gathered her children closer to her and hurried away. Sometimes our appearance can confuse others even when we have little control over it.

Location: Born in CT, grew up in IL, lived for awhile in UT, currently in IL 1. Jello--side dish or dessert? Dessert, but depending on how it is made and what is in the jello it can be a side dish 2. Soda, pop, or coke? Soda 3. Mac and cheese--side dish or main dish? Mostly a main dish because I am lazy, but it can be a side dish 4. Biscuits and gravy--tear up the biscuit and eat with spoon or split biscuit and eat with knife/fork? Split and knife and fork, usually just a fork 5. Grits--sweet or savory? Savory, my hubby introduced me to grits and made it with sugar the first time, I swore off grits for years until he had me try a savory variation with bacon and lots of cheese, now I am for savory grits all the way. 6. Bathroom tissue--over or under? Over, under just bugs me. As a side note to this, as Dravin and Pam mentioned for themselves our TP rarely makes it to be hung, our TP dispenser is right over the vent so putting a roll on results in a mess of TP all over the place, our TP usually rests on the counter right next to the flushable wipes. 7. Green onions or scallions? Green onions 8. Pecan: pecahn or peecan? Peecan