dahlia

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  1. Like
    dahlia got a reaction from Blackmarch in Taking advantage of a HT or letting him do his thing?   
    Y'all know I live with my grown son. I think that, since the father died when my son was 14, said son didn't have the opportunity to learn the manly homely stuff guys usually learn from their fathers. Ergo, I usually have to call on a professional when I have house problems.
     
    My HT is a gem. A wonderful guy, the same age as my son, but who knows home repair.  He is rehabbing his house and is pretty competent from what I've seen.  He patched the interior damage from last winter's storms and put up a ceiling fan for me. I am grateful for this service. I would have, and could have, paid a professional, but HT offered, I knew he'd done this kind of work before, so I let him. I also provided a little gift as part of me feels weird that it's being done for free.
     
    Well, I mentioned was going to get a new toilet and that I had purchased and installed one thru a plumber earlier and was going to do use the same guy. HT says he's done that before, had put one in his current house, and would be happy to install it.
     
    I want to add that one of my friends, also a single mom, uses her HTs for everything. I always think I should be struggling before I ask, mostly because these guys have demanding jobs and need to spend time with their families. For some reason I also think that if I can afford to hire someone, I should, before asking my HT for help.
     
    So, my Hank Hill of a HT, who was practically salivating at the idea of putting in the toilet, wants to do that for me (obviously I'd buy the supplies). Should I let him? Is this the proper use of a HT?  Why do I feel this borders on using people?
  2. Like
    dahlia got a reaction from Iggy in Long Vs. Short Hair   
    That's a lot of hair to take care of, Anatess.  Most of my life, my hair was mid-back; I am mixed black & white and my hair is curly. When I was on the east coast, I'd have Dominicans or Puerto Ricans deal with it in the salon. In high school, when straight hair was the style, I had to use huge rollers or iron it. A lot of angina.  Plus, bad experiences left me afraid of hair stylists. I would just cut the ends myself and use Nice n'Easy. I pulled it back in a bun or pony tail a lot because it was just easier to deal with that way.
     
    Well, styles changed and I found I could go out in public with curly hair. When I started worked again after grad school, I braved the stylist again and had her color and cut. I found that at a medium length, with a great cut, I can wash it and go. Since then, since I'm a Mormon and all and don't spend my money on liquor and cigarettes, I decided I would always treat myself to getting a professional cut and color. When it's freshly done, I look darned cute and I feel like a grown up. For some reason, having a head of curly hair always makes me feel like I'm somebody's mom or some hippie chick (OK, I'm guilty of both,actually), and not the cut throat lawyer or demon professor that I am. 
  3. Like
    dahlia got a reaction from classylady in Long Vs. Short Hair   
    I don't think there's an age when you have to cut it. I do think there might be age limits (you aren't there yet, OP) on color options.
     
    I am pretty traditional about women's hair. I see these older women (who are probably my age, they just look old) with gray hair cut short like a guy's. And no, they aren't gay, these are (I assume) married women walking around Walmart with their husbands. I don't understand why a woman would want such an unflattering, unfeminine cut. Since I was a young widow and didn't have the luxury of time to make me sick of my husband : ), maybe I still hold romantic illusions about being attractive to my man. You'd think the husbands would say something. I'm not against short hair; there are cute short pixie cuts that look feminine. I'm taking about a woman who looks like she got the $5 hair cut at a barbershop. /rant
  4. Like
    dahlia got a reaction from Maureen in Long Vs. Short Hair   
    That's a lot of hair to take care of, Anatess.  Most of my life, my hair was mid-back; I am mixed black & white and my hair is curly. When I was on the east coast, I'd have Dominicans or Puerto Ricans deal with it in the salon. In high school, when straight hair was the style, I had to use huge rollers or iron it. A lot of angina.  Plus, bad experiences left me afraid of hair stylists. I would just cut the ends myself and use Nice n'Easy. I pulled it back in a bun or pony tail a lot because it was just easier to deal with that way.
     
    Well, styles changed and I found I could go out in public with curly hair. When I started worked again after grad school, I braved the stylist again and had her color and cut. I found that at a medium length, with a great cut, I can wash it and go. Since then, since I'm a Mormon and all and don't spend my money on liquor and cigarettes, I decided I would always treat myself to getting a professional cut and color. When it's freshly done, I look darned cute and I feel like a grown up. For some reason, having a head of curly hair always makes me feel like I'm somebody's mom or some hippie chick (OK, I'm guilty of both,actually), and not the cut throat lawyer or demon professor that I am. 
  5. Like
    dahlia reacted to Anddenex in Fear of the Lord - LDS style   
    Dahlia, while I was looking for another quote I came across these two quotes within my notes (particularly second quote):
     
     
  6. Like
    dahlia got a reaction from Blackmarch in Couldya, wouldya   
    I think it depends on the item and how I can work it into my current living arrangements. I've seen too many Hoarders shows with places stuffed to the rafters with dead parents' and grandparents' stuff because no one could part with it. I've told my son to pick a few things he wants and feel free to get rid of the rest. He's under no obligation to be buried under my stuff just because it was mine.
     
    I guess my mother has most of our family's keepsakes. I know I don't have them. When it is time to divide them up, I'm not going to argue over who gets what or if something is sold because, since they haven't been part of my life, they don't mean much to me. I might take a couple of small things from what she's saved as well as her own estate and call it a day.
     
    That said, my husband didn't leave much behind. We gave away most of his clothes, keeping a few items for ourselves, and kept the few nicknacks he had. What I won't get rid of is a collection of Army documents, some old resumes, and the few cards I have left from him. I can see what he was doing at different parts of his life, some before I met him, see how silly he was with the cards he selected, etc. I also have a set of imitation pearls that he gave me when Barbara Bush's pearls and the dress for success look was in. They aren't expensive and the finish has rubbed off of some, but I asked for them and he got them. That didn't happen a lot.   I told my son to keep them.
  7. Like
    dahlia reacted to Anddenex in Fear of the Lord - LDS style   
    I think Doctrine & Covenants 130: 20-21 follows suit with Karma.  Also the parable of the seed.  We reap what we sow.  If we do good, then good will be restored unto us and if we do evil, evil will be restored unto us.
  8. Like
    dahlia got a reaction from Anddenex in Fear of the Lord - LDS style   
    Very true.
     
     
     
    Also true. I think that today, most people think there will be no accounting for their actions. Either there is no God, so nothing you do matters, or that God is so merciful that there will be no punishment in this life or the next.  But they will find that "justice has its demand."  (I like that)
     
    Speaking of justice, is there a prohibition against believing in or support the idea of karma? It's always so much better when justice's demands are meted out in this life so we can all see.
  9. Like
    dahlia reacted to Anddenex in Fear of the Lord - LDS style   
    Unfortunately Dahlia, this appears to be a cyclic characteristic trait of those who have had the fullness of the gospel in any dispensation.
     
    As the Nephites began to understand God's love they grew up in righteousness and then slowly denied the commandments of God thinking they know of themselves.  We see this today in our culture.  The learned begin to think they know of themselves and forget that not only is God a God of mercy, he is also just, and justice has its demand.
     
    This is something that continuously bugged me when I returned home from my mission and seeing so many returned missionaries forget simple acts of obedience. 
     
    As the Book of Mormon suggests the devil is crafty in his persuasions toward the elect, and they soon loose their fear of the justice of God.
  10. Like
    dahlia reacted to Just_A_Guy in Fear of the Lord - LDS style   
    I'm inclined to agree with your observation on LDS culture; though I think guilt can often be a pretty powerful motivator.
     
    FWIW--the Hebrew word is yir'ah, which can be translated as "fear" or--alternatively--"reverence".
  11. Like
    dahlia got a reaction from Wingnut in Couldya, wouldya   
    I think it depends on the item and how I can work it into my current living arrangements. I've seen too many Hoarders shows with places stuffed to the rafters with dead parents' and grandparents' stuff because no one could part with it. I've told my son to pick a few things he wants and feel free to get rid of the rest. He's under no obligation to be buried under my stuff just because it was mine.
     
    I guess my mother has most of our family's keepsakes. I know I don't have them. When it is time to divide them up, I'm not going to argue over who gets what or if something is sold because, since they haven't been part of my life, they don't mean much to me. I might take a couple of small things from what she's saved as well as her own estate and call it a day.
     
    That said, my husband didn't leave much behind. We gave away most of his clothes, keeping a few items for ourselves, and kept the few nicknacks he had. What I won't get rid of is a collection of Army documents, some old resumes, and the few cards I have left from him. I can see what he was doing at different parts of his life, some before I met him, see how silly he was with the cards he selected, etc. I also have a set of imitation pearls that he gave me when Barbara Bush's pearls and the dress for success look was in. They aren't expensive and the finish has rubbed off of some, but I asked for them and he got them. That didn't happen a lot.   I told my son to keep them.
  12. Like
    dahlia reacted to Dravin in Furiously angry   
    Admittedly this is just me being contrary, show up wearing more cloth next time.
  13. Like
    dahlia got a reaction from Blackmarch in David Prisco From Philadelphia, Pa Has A Few Q's   
    David - former 'Fluffian' here and former Catholic. You might want to look at ' Catholic Roots Mormon Harvest' by Eric Shuster, a Catholic convert whose wife has a masters in Catholic theology. They do a good description and explanation of where Catholics and Mormons are similar and where they differ.
     
    As a Catholic (12 yrs Catholic school, but not in Philly) I was never encouraged to read the Bible. I knew Bible stories, and took a college course in the Bible as literature, but never knew the detail of the Bible itself. I have found that every time I had doubts about where Mormons were getting their theology and 'facts' from, they could point to the Bible and there it was! It's been an amazing trip.
  14. Like
    dahlia got a reaction from Suzie in Why can't life be easier?   
    Also document any time you deal with him and he is drunk, high, or whatever.  Ditto on the divorce lawyer (and not a generalist. Get someone who does this a lot.).
  15. Like
    dahlia reacted to notquiteperfect in Why can't life be easier?   
    Aside from getting a lawyer, start documenting everything - dates, times, phone calls, when he drops the ball, financial matters, etc.
  16. Like
    dahlia got a reaction from notquiteperfect in LDS letter addresses online criticisms about women   
    The more I read, the more I wondered how things could go this wrong. This stuff would never happen in my ward. We've got HTs that you can't keep away from doing things for you, especially the few of us who are single women. I can't imagine a bishop who would comment on whether someone was healing fast enough after surgery. Geez Louise.
     
    If I'd been an investigator in this kind of ward, I would never have joined. If this kind of garbage was going on currently in my ward, I'd probably stop going or just sit in on another ward's Sacrament Meeting  until they told me to stop. I might have to get up in somebody's face if they said something stupid/harassing to me.
     
    And, may I ask, where were the missionaires? They should have helped with the sprinklers if no man in the ward was willing to do so.
     
    Because this is a college town, our ward members are from all over.  I've never heard anyone say they were in a ward, anywhere, with this kind of behavior.
  17. Like
    dahlia reacted to Windseeker in What’s the last movie you watched?   
    Yeah..that was my rant. It was just so out of touch for me, though I have no doubt that there are kids that are raised like this especially in the director and writers gilded world. The concern with modesty, dating, computers etc..were depicted as silly outdated concerns by ignorant inept adults.
  18. Like
    dahlia got a reaction from Windseeker in What’s the last movie you watched?   
    TRANSFORMERS!!!  Yay!   Big, noisy, funny, thought-provoking (in terms of the canon). I love this kind of action movie.
     
    btw-- the daughter, about to graduate from high school, was dating a 20 yr old that the dad didn't know about and running around in cutoffs so short, the pockets hung past the legs.  This prompted an interesting conversation with my son on childraising, modesty, dating, computers in the bedroom (you can't tell me she wasn't doing nekkid Skype with the guy), etc.  This is what comes from lack of control in the home. /rant
  19. Like
    dahlia got a reaction from Sunday21 in What to give to ladies I visit teach at Xmas   
    I've given tins of Danish butter cookies - something that the family can eat and (at least here) is only sold during the holidays, so it's kinda special, even if it isn't expensive.
     
    I'm with you on the baking. I'm actually pretty decent, but these Mormon women out here make there own freakin' CANDY! I can't compete. I get the cookies, or a small Godiva box, or maybe a scented candle and call it a day.
  20. Like
    dahlia got a reaction from Backroads in Church and socializing   
    Your bishop said you were whining?????  Wow. You'd think he'd be more sensitive. 
     
    This is why I have issues with taking everything to the bishop. I've been reading these and other LDS boards for awhile now and it's obvious to me that they just don't have the training they need for some of the problems they encounter and church members suffer because of it.
  21. Like
    dahlia got a reaction from Backroads in History of the White shirt   
    If we can make the guys wear white shirts, can we get the women to stop wearing flip flops? 
  22. Like
    dahlia reacted to Sunday21 in Church and socializing   
    I have a suggestion ...but it involves changing your behaviour. Yep, If you want more friends, you have to change. Go to church activities at least a half a hour early and help set up. Never say a negative word around church members again. No cynicism no sarcasm. Smile. Only pleasant words. Be positive if it kills you. Give it six months.
  23. Like
    dahlia got a reaction from Jennarator in History of the White shirt   
    If we can make the guys wear white shirts, can we get the women to stop wearing flip flops? 
  24. Like
    dahlia reacted to mirkwood in "What did you expect would happen when you made that choice?"   
    *yawn*  just another apostate looking for 15 minutes.
  25. Like
    dahlia got a reaction from Blackmarch in Looking to learn more/possibly convert   
    I wish we had found the Church when my husband was alive. It might have helped him fight some of his demons left over from Vietnam. It also would have given him a place to be around other men with families. We might have had a whole 'nother life.
    But, I have had all his work done and we only need to be sealed. I can't tell you how happy that makes me feel.