Praetorian_Brow

I regard exotic pet ownership as non-native species. Obviously it wouldn't be much of an issue to adopt a squirrel if its native to the area, there is such a thing as called acceptable risk for the owners and the neightbours, hence why most districts or cities impose a general ban or a specific ban. It is also easier to impose the general ban as most people do not care, or lack the educated background to make an informed choice, other than, "Thats cute, I want it." Even if I lived within an area where Anacondas were native, I wouldn't adopt one because I found some kind of emotional connection to it. Neither would I adopt a badger. I will credit you with pointing out the specifics that I did not mention in order for me to qualify for a "logical" statement and agree to a certain extent on the specifics you mentioned, even if it doesn't change my stance on the subject. I would suggest that I was alarmed that you seem to care more for snakes than dumpster babies, but we are who we associate with.

You just compared human babies to snakes, well done. Very peculiar to coddle the Biblical manifestation of Satan, as of course, we need to bring scripture into it, as that is the only acceptable proof within the confines of this forum. Whatever emotional attachment you have to the snakes is your business and obviously my statement garnered an immediate maternal emotional defensive reaction, which is intriguing and a bit alarming as it seems a tad...out there. I highly doubt they return the sentiment, no matter your rationalization. I used to work with someone who owned a snake and put hand lotion on the snake, to make its skin supple. Very odd. There is a massive difference between a domesticated species and some animal picked up for aesthetic or hipster reasons. No matter the fear of your slithering children being taken, I still don't think it justifies exotic pet ownership. My stance on the subject remains, ban them.

Exotic pets need to be banned, as they are usually an invasive species and more often than not, the pet owners are irresponsible and let them loose within the environment, creating havoc.

America will default on their loans, crashing the markets and ending their barely 70 year "empire". However, as it rusts away, just like the USSR did, more people will get desperate, leading to more conflict. Besides, its easier to attack the same people who hold your loans, sort of like what Germany did with France.

Don't worry, I am making excuses too. I am 30, single, was laid off from my 50k a year job, 3 months ago, have no kids and am waiting for who knows what to happen, while my swimmers are aging and my bank account drying up. Toss in a woman who I love, who plays me and other men, comes and goes, while telling me if only I fixed this and this about myself, we would be together, despite me teaching her what she needs for a relationship, love, worthiness, patience that sort of thing. Life is fun, eh?

My mother had 7 seven kids, while fighting depression her whole life. I concluded that she had kids to feel better about herself, but I don't fault her for being a poor mother as she did her best. My parents are now divorced. Please do not have kids to distract from relationship issues, as it is irresponsible and seems to lead to an inevitable divorce with the kids being scarred for life. It sounds like you two are in a feedback loop. You ask or suggest, she withdraws. She withdraws so you ask/suggest, which leads to her resenting how you are asking or suggesting. Toss in the male tendency to focus one problem and believe there is one solution that will fix the complaint, add a huge dose of the female believing everything is connected and her not actually talking about the root cause but some minor thing, then you get a cocktail of life. You both need therapy, combined and separate. This could help in the meantime: Emotional Chaos to Clarity: How to Live More Skillfully, Make Better Decisions, and Find Purpose in Life: Phillip Moffitt: 9781594630927: Amazon.com: Books Forgiving Our Parents, Forgiving Ourselves: Healing Adult Children of Dysfunctional Families: David Stoop: 9780830757237: Amazon.com: Books I credit you for coming to these forums for advice, but I also think about my father and how I acted in my crazy "relationship". My father would tell my mother how she could "fix" herself, which would then lead to her feeling more isolated and resentful of his suggestions as it seemed he didn't care or understand what she was going through. Fast forward to my 4 years of life with a woman and she didn't care nor want to understand my depression and she resented my suggestions to "fix" herself, while exploding over minor issues and not speaking of the root cause. You two can work through it but I think its a case of getting out of the feedback loops and looking at alternative ways of communication or approaching each other.

I have been on the receiving end of an anxiety fueled woman. Any little thing becomes this nuclear explosion of fears that immediately become my responsibility regardless of how minor the fear is. This is woman on a freak out times a 1000, so much more than just a a case of woman drama. For me, it was like walking on a pleasant pathway of life, then suddenly a volcano erupts under my feet and no matter what I say or how I listen, I get deluged with a torrent of lava. Usually the real reason is hidden by her geyser of magma that snatches onto some minor detail that I most likely misspoke about. Even if I have listened for years of it, been patient, forgiving her for the frequency and the inevitable finger pointing, its exhausting and soul draining. If you know you have anxiety issues and he still wants to be in your life, listens, still loves you even with the storms, then he is a keeper. Although, I suggest that you look into therapy or some self control measures as the stress of marriage will increase the frequency of anxiety.

My point was that the waste killed the fish/lobster stocks, not that piracy is trying to save the planet. So the fishermen turned into pirates. No idea where that assumption that these were Green peace activists came from. Nor, did I blame international companies as the sole problem. I suppose I assume that the people reading this are aware of the state of Somalia. Still, I shake my head. Forums are such fun!

Cracks let the light in.

My younger sister married a Filipino and their idea of family was a foreign to us. I applaud that they communicated on everything, but its a bit of a turn off when a husband speaks to his parents about marital issues before he speaks to his wife. Western world seems to adopt a more hands off approach when it comes to family communication. Obviously women are more keen an this idea of nauseating over communication and men are less interested in hearing about everything. However, now that I can understand my parents marital issues, I can understand the context of why our family behaved the way it did and the dysfunctions that appeared, based on the symptoms. I am for total honesty, my family does not communicate, we are all islands but we resent that no one tells each other anything. So my conclusion, is be honest with close friends and family about marital issues, especially so the kids don't assume its their fault and go into life with extra baggage. As a child, I blamed myself for my parents marital issues and that has led to my own issues in life. Be honest in the context that the can be understood, even vague hints are better than...secrets. Don't ask, don't tell policy, leads to hidden secrets that lead to further relationship failures with the kids. Its also a family dysfunction.

Forum junkies are funny. I bring up an initial observation that very few have an understanding of, then it seems as if they then go to google or wikipedia soon after and are suddenly an expert on the subject and instructing me, which is fine, as often I am hazy on the details. I applaud the quests for clarification and the pursuit of knowledge, but it amuses me. I suppose I should just be grateful I was able to shed light on the topic and we all come away with a better understanding in the end, just as long as the intentions of all parties wasn't for mere ego purposes. Yes, Anatess, you're correct, I did miss some points. Somewhere in there, the failed military mission by the U.S. military should be mentioned, as that led to approximately 20 marine deaths and 5000 Somali deaths. Read on that subject and I think you would dislike the "heroic" Black Hawk Down movie as well.

Going to "eliminate" all of Somalia while you are at it? The piracy in that region was initially a product of starving people, who lost their fishing livelihood after international companies dumped toxic waste in their water and over fished the area.

Weapons laws are not universal and its tangled web of international law. Pirates can board fairly easily on a huge ship. If I knew someone was pointing RPG's at my truck while they were in a rickshaw with a jet engine on it, I would be intimidated myself. Customs needs to be as smooth as possible as the profit margin for these ships is set on a schedule, so simply "filling out the paperwork" if it is even an option for most countries is not the catch all solution to piracy. The world's navies wouldn't be in the Gulf of Aden, if it was simply a case of just giving the ships weapons to fight for themselves.

The Pirates are not interested in damaging the ship or the crew, as both are required for ransom demands that usually fetch millions from the shipping company. Push comes to shove though, they will do whatever they deem within their best interests or save their own skin. Life in Somalia is cheap and horrible. An RPG, or a rocket propelled grenade (a grenade launcher is something entirely different) as typiucally used by the pirates could damage the hull, but I doubt it could cause enough damage to sink a freight ship by itself. Small arms, AKs (assault rifles) and RPKs (machine guns) as typically used by the pirates wouldn't do much damage again'st the hull of a typical freighter that is targeted, but it would do damage and frighten the crew. In banks, the tellers are instructed to comply with the demands of the robber. Same thing here. Cheaper, safer to just give them what they want. Fighting will result in death, injury and damage which is more expensive than the demands in most cases.

Trying explaining a grenade launcher to every customs officer at every port, in every country. Even a .22 would require declaration and the proper paperwork. Most weapons in countries require a tree's worth of paperwork to certify and to prove the possession is legal. Entering a port requires conformance to all the laws of the port of entry. It is easier and cheaper, not to carry weapons on a ship of commerce. International law applies in international waters and I think some people forget that such a thing exists. I loathe movies like these ones, because they distort facts and root causes and portray someone as a hero when they are usually less than that. People with no understanding of military operations, or international law, or even of the subject, assume because it is "based on a real story", what happens and how it happened in the movie is a good reference point for their understanding of the subject. I cringe when I see actors trying to behave like military or movies trying to replicate operations. I put this movie into the same category of Black Hawk Down. They even have links, believe it or not. Enjoyable until real facts are researched and then repugnant thereafter.

If I judged all those around me as being unfit to be my friends, simply because I knew something about them that I didn't agree with, then I wouldn't have any friends at all. Just because someone was honest about themselves, doesn't mean that they are less worthy of being a friend than the majority who lie and keep their problems a secret, or act hypocritically. Everyone is a quality person, much like everyone is a son or daughter of God, even if we know about their poor choices that they are asking for help and understanding with by being honest and upfront. I am more afraid of the friends that deny they have any issues, as they are far more likely to encourage negative behaviours than the ones who admit to issues. Plus, if they were honest with me, it means they trust me, which is what a good friend is. I highly doubt you're in a position to judge yourself.

Commendable that you feel guilty that you could not prevent a tragedy, but unrealistic to blame yourself for another ones behaviour. I can understand that you associate mentally ill people with this traumatic event, but believing all mentally ill people are dangerous to society is a gross generalization and a disservice to everyone needing compassion. In Canada, a gun application will be denied if the applicant is depressed or found to be depressed as the RCMP will call the references that are provided. This is to prevent more suicides, as the easiest and most common way to commit suicide is to use a gun. On the extreme spectrum, one could speak of the mass shootings that happen, generally because they shooter is mentally ill, but as always that is an extreme minority, just like terrorism is conducted by a minority. Its as if some suggest a TSA approach should be used for everyone to screen mental illness, with the irony being that everyone would be apprehended as it would be assumed that mentally ill people would dangerous. Medication is not the sole answer, but in some cases with careful dosage control and monitoring it can benefit the patient and provide the patient with stability, but generally speaking, I have seen medication abused and treated like a catch all solution with ignored consequences. The answer for most people suffering from mental illness, therapy first and medication should be considered second in isolated cases. Therapy is far more expensive and time consuming than simply offering a convenient pill that is pushed by the profit driven pharmaceutical companies, so most people see it as unavailable. Mental illness is a broad term that covers psychosis, epilepsy, depression, mood disorders, etc. that can strike anyone from stress, family issues, loss and social isolation. I am a trained infantry soldier, I have not seen combat, but I understand the stresses and strains of that field. I would suggest that nearly all veterans who see combat and even those who were just trained, suffer from some version of mental illness as a consequence of the extreme stress or seeing someone's life taken. Its sort of ironic to ignore those who are termed "heroic", a term applied to them by civilians and rarely applied to themselves, are generally left to fend for themselves or are seen as weak for seeking help. It leaves a problem, in that a huge number of people seen as hero's, who are asked to perform a service for their country, are then considered dangerous to society on their return. If one walked a mile in their shoes, just as Jesus teaches, one could have compassion for those we deem mentally ill. My whole family suffers from depression in some form, myself included. Nature is assumed to be the root cause, but ignoring nurture is a grave mistake, as if someone walked in our shoes and our parents shoes, I highly doubt anyone could judge us for who we are. Treat people with compassion and it will create far more peace than condemning them through ignorance. Be prudent for self protection, but kindness prevents far more hostility than fear ever will.

Thank you for that link, as this hits the nail on the head. Tony Lister is astute and everyone should listen to what you linked to. mrmarklin, you don't understand pornography at all and are contributing to the problem by being unfair. Putting your head into the sand and ignoring that its happening is contributing to the problem, by making those around you conform to your idea of life, rather than accepting and helping. Many are like you within the church culture, they judge when they shouldn't. Pornography is everywhere and no one is immune in today's culture of over saturation with media. Chances are, you yourself have been exposed to it in some form , even if you rightly view it as disgusting. Cosmo, 17, Victoria's Secret, commercials, billboards, movies, books, posters all can be be considering pornographic and contribute to the pornography epidemic by enticing for more. These enticements, which are everywhere are candy to a man who loves visual stimulation and for a teenage boy, where the problem usually begins, viewing underwear is exciting and merely a matter of looking the newspaper, but soon thereafter, this boy and even girls can find all the stimulation they need by simply logging onto the internet.

It is possible, but rare, given human history and tendencies a negative result is more often achieved. Dalai Lama epitomizes this.

I think its an odd thing to proclaim us as having more proof of God or more divine right than anyone else, considering that all churches have claimed such legitimacy, which is ironic because no one can refute the claims as divine right seems applicable only to the one proclaiming their faith. There is a foreign film called Agora, which I thought was a good demonstration of who labels who. The Pagans controlled the Great Library of Alexandria, but attacked the Christians because the Pagans believed they were correct, then the Christians attacked the Pagans and over time, took over, then the Jews were attacked by the Christians, just like the Pagans had attacked them. The real tragedy is that everyone is looking for an external enemy, or a scapegoat while ignoring their own internal rot. We share more in common with other religions than not, regardless of whether or not they are Christian. Mutual understanding will encourage more spirituality than a concentrated effort to identify what is lacking from another perspective.

Guilt tripping him will not bring the results you think they will, neither will the tough love approach. Talk to a therapist, go outside.

People confuse sacred with secret or taboo, which leads to many people wrongly assuming that discussing the topic will lead to experimentation, a lack of respect or an insatiable new appetite. My parents treated this subject as taboo, so I was not informed at all and learned it through the hard knocks of life, I learned about it from friends, books, phys ed class and the internet, which is the wrong way to learn about the birds and the bees as there is no respect taught and led to much emotional and spiritual turmoil. Choices were my own, but an ounce of wisdom can prevent a lifetime of misery. Educate your kids! Barring that, I think church doctrine should treat the subject with a bit more hands on, than simply glossing it over and having another generation live in ignorance or go the opposite way, leave the church for physical appetites or even worse, lie about their activities to remain "worthy".

Roundabouts are fun, even if I get annoyed at timid people using the yield sign as a 5 minute red light. I haven't been on any huge roundabouts, but we do have 3 lane roundabouts in my city. Using my blinker on a roundabout is dangerous, as by the time I stare at the fellow about to swipe me, I am at my exit, so I rarely use the turn signal.

I for one, don't appreciate drowning and being smashed on the rocks of womanly wiles, for that is what a Siren's call is. I have yet to meet a woman who will row her boat to my ship, for instead, I have to take my ship and chase her boat through the shoals, while she nags me about the barnacles on my boat, then robs me blind, when I do clean it.

Speak to a therapist immediately. The feel good religious stuff is great, but it doesn't satisfy any of the root problems, of say, cognitive distortions or childhood issues. I understand, believe me I do. I am currently seeing a therapist myself and it is a good experience, in that I do not feel judged, ostracized or condemned by those who do not understand, which is most people. Cause and effect in my case is that my parents were not emotionally available, I was left to fend for myself as a child, parents divorced and both my parents have their own unresolved issues. I also have difficulty in sticking with goals. Difficult relationships seem to exacerbate illusions about myself and I start to believe what I am told, which leads to further self doubt and fear. Then again, I seem to find women with more unresolved emotional stuff than I have, but they hide it better than I do. LDS family services will find you a therapist at a discounted price, consult your Bishop. If you cannot afford one, which in your case shouldn't matter as your mental health is more important, the church may cover a large portion or all of of the costs associated with the therapist. I would also suggest that you should find a therapist that you are comfortable with, as they are not all created equal. In the meantime, read these books. Emotional Chaos to Clarity: Move from the Chaos of the Reactive Mind to the Clarity of the Responsive Mind: Phillip Moffitt: 9780142196762: Amazon.com: Books Forgiving Our Parents, Forgiving Ourselves: Healing Adult Children of Dysfunctional Families: David Stoop: 9780830757237: Amazon.com: Books