Praetorian_Brow

I believe part of the problem is that women seem to make themselves more attractive and look inward in the hopes of external appreciation, rather than just expressing verbal or physical interest in the man. Its as if some woman believe that making themselves more attractive will change the interaction and base their success of the man's reaction, rather than simply expressing interest in the man. The man is confused by this idea that the woman works on herself, as if she believes that working on herself is a solution to the man's frustration, but seems to forget him in the process. I'll never understand women, as I don't think its necessary to speak of everything, I can think of nothing when I wish and speaking of feelings all the time confuses me.

Been there. I was near the same age as you when I went and spoke to the bishop. For weeks I fretted about his reaction, and worried about possible judgement. I used to think I was some terrible person because I wasn't following the commandments or the church doctrine to the letter. I even let the guilt consume my mind and figured the embarrassment of telling a church leader that I respected, that I touched myself in an intimate manner was more important than my spiritual receptive mind. Its sort of a strange thing to live a life thinking sex is this evil thing, then go tell a person that I did those things with myself. Eventually, I realized that I needed help and I couldn't break the cycle myself. I realized that I was doing a disservice to others with my unrighteous behaviour. I had voluntarily stopped preparing and serving the sacrament months before I confessed, as I felt that it was wrong that I should serve unworthily, unfortunately, that had an opposite effect in that I felt that I could never be worthy and therefore, I started to avoid church. The bishop is there to help you and believe me, they have heard it all before. When I finally blurted it out that I masturbated, the bishop just smiled with no judgement on his face and said that he was glad I was there to talk about it. It was a great feeling to have confessed, to have unloaded an ever increasing weight of guilt. He offered suggestions to me and wished me the best. I walked out with a vast feeling of relief that I was not as worthless as I had led myself to believe. Just go to him, blurt it out and I promise you, it will help, because after all you understand the sanctity of church callings and understand that your inner peace has been compromised, which makes it difficult to be on the same wave length of the spirit. Accepting that you need help is one of the first steps to recovery, which means that attending the addiction recovery classes will help you overcome yourself and increase your spiritual potential.

Interesting, I never knew there was a focused effort or discipline to do this. There are times in my life where I have been doing something random and it seemed as if my ...soul or essence tried to escape my body but was stuffed back in. No, I have never done drugs. Very odd experiences and I have never forgotten them.

The only way The One exists, is if you make it happen. There are pages and pages on this forum about gender roles and expectations with references to a life plan that is somehow mysteriously absent during the angst of a single life. A successful relationship that can lead to marriage, tends to be a collision of self acceptance, realization that there is no perfect person designed specifically for us, random chance, with a dash of persistence and a whisk of attractive preparation. I used to think I was too immature to date, too unattractive, but the reality that I realized, nearly 10 years later than everyone else, is that I was more mature and attractive than most of my peers. So instead of accepting what is, I lived in a world of wishful thinking with the years spiraling by. I am still single, but enthralled in the mind games of a woman, who frustrates the heck out of me. I love her though.

Its like when a girlfriend dumps you because they want you to improve yourself, except in this case, the church actually tells you that you need to. Its supposed to be a wake up call, that whatever someone did, they need to realize the severity of their actions and the consequences.

The key to what God says, always seems to be a person, interpreting what God actually said. Its fairly easy to sway others if they believe someone has the sole divine authority to speak on behalf of divinity. I am not inferring that all of God's chose mouth pieces deliberately distort the picture for their own gain, but I am sure some pass on a message based on ignorance, wishful thinking, innocence, ambition, disdain and all the wonderful qualities that Pandora released from her box. Then we have the Bible, which apparently is God's word, translated from many books into one 1600 years after the fact, written by many many authors over countless years and some of them like to change mythology into Christian ways. Then the Book of Mormon is 1800 years after the fact. I am not disputing my own belief in any of those books or anyone else, but its an odd thing to contemplate. Religions need leaders, religions need authority, religions need justification to state their perspectives. I also recognize that there were female prophets in the Bible. I also recognize that most religions are practical, in the name of God of course, so lets say there is a shortage of men and would be surprised at how quickly female clergy becomes important. I doubt it.

You will claim its satire, but its insulting. However, all is fair in love and war. Ask for Saudia Arabia's input, as they understand the region more and would garner more respect from Iraqis.

I can understand Iran being part of the middle Eastern picture, but I am slightly confused as to why that would justify the Iraq situation, which was the main drive of this topic. Perhaps the topic drifted that way out of convenience, as defending that position has reached an impasse. While it makes me uncomfortable that any nation possess nuclear weapons, I disapprove that a nation could dictate what another nation can and cannot do, based on the potential for development and the U.S. sanctions seem to have only added hardship to their people. Its not hard to train citizens to hate another country when said country is dictating terms.

I shudder at the idea that university would be heaven. Everyone would be convinced that they should be making at least 5 times the poverty rate, everyone would be afraid of manual labour and wouldn't know how to dance. Sitting in a class of 600 is not my idea of heaven, so excuse me if I am not keen to participate. Although, I wouldn't mind pursuing a theology degree if I was there, oh wait, if its only Mormonism, that would make the degree somewhat less appealing and getting a job from it would be less likely.

There was no active chemical weapons program for years and they did have stockpiled munitions, much like every country on Earth had at one time. Terrorism will always exist, domestic or international and its wise to be vigilant. Ironically, by invading both countries, terrorism has increased. What about all those drone strikes? Seems a strange way of defending "Freedom" by disregarding sovereignty and the legal process, by firing missiles at people. Do you think their children are going for forget and move on? Nope, they will get back in the only way they know how. Another man's terrorist is another man's patriot. Canada did not go to Iraq, despite it being requested by Bush because our Prime Minister did not agree that it was merited. Unfortunately, Bush insulted most of the long time American allies by stating that his allies had to be with him or against him. Canada has been in Afghanistan since 2001 and our military might be considered a joke by American standards, despite its high professionalism, but considering that we have barely 70 000 full time military and 30 000 reserve, our contribution is respectable. The Afghan war was mildly justifiable as the Afghan people were suffering and were harbouring Bin Laden, although, ironically, I don't really see the U.S. attacking Pakistan for harbouring him there. Pakistan has a policy of taking money from the U.S. but sponsoring unrest in Afghanistan, as Afghanistan is to Pakistan, what North Korea is to China. A buffer. Regarding your nationalism, it was not intended to be insulting, rather it was an observation as on a personal level you seemed keen to justify a war of aggression for any reason, while disregarding the unjust circumstances. I realize that no matter how much rhetoric or "evidence" is pointed in your direction, nationalism will be far more important than the rational or results. Its actually quite frightening to know that the colour guard of democracy and human rights is so keen on war. Either way, Iraq is in more trouble than it was before and I am sure the people know that.

Coalition Provisional Authority Order 2 - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia Marshall Plan - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia You take umbrage at my comparison of Iraq and Afghanistan as failed objectives, then compare those two to the rebuilding of Japan and Germany. Ridiculous. Germany as a nation accepted defeat, as did Japan and there was no significant resistance in preventing reconstruction. I merely conclude that your patriotism was insulted on some level. I suppose Vietnam was considered a success for you as well. Arm chair commanders are always interesting to speak with, especially when they don't really seem to grasp a soldiers motives. As far as most troops are concerned, war is the highlight of their career and that patriotic crap only lasts until basic training, when bullets are flying and for stories to tell your family. To answer your question, I am sure as an American you are well aware of the farce of weapons of mass destruction promoted by Bush to prop up ailing polls. Wonder what happened to General Powell, the guy who had to speak to UN because his civilian superiors told him to promote the war, well he essentially resigned out of shame, once he learned the whole motive was a sham. I guess that was conveniently forgotten by history. Trainers would be a swell idea. Evidently, you think I am full of ...crap to be polite, but I think you merely conveniently forget reality as wishful thinking seems more appealing. I agree some good has come of the wars, but I would hazard a guess that if you asked any Iraqi or Afghani that they have a different idea of said...reconstruction. Watch this, it will help you.

Invading a sovereign country under false pretenses, ousting the leader, dismissing all forms of internal security, promoting a form of governance that is largely unknown by the citizens, attempt to police them through brute force and the American people seem surprised the country is worse off than it was before. Their government must be in dire straits if they asked their former invaders for assistance and it would be a huge blow to their independence. As noted by the article, Iraq refused to grant legal immunity to U.S. soldiers, which was requested by the American government in order to maintain a presence. Given that Shria law is a bit, medieval, it still leaves some strange questions as to why another country who supposedly has the bests interests of the occupied country, has no interest in said countries laws. Seems a bit strange to occupy a country for close to 10 years, promote democracy at bayonet point and then say screw you, when they ask for help. Very strange. Afghanistan will be much the same and the U.S. will be asking, what was the point. Before I get hate mail, I volunteered to go to Afghanistan, which is a big deal here and unfortunately I quit the army for personal reasons before going. As far I was concerned, going to Afghanistan was a career move, not some bid for protecting Freedom. Afghanistan is where armies go to die, Alexander the Great lost an army there, the British tried and died, the Russians tried and died, but nope, history was ignored. Iraq is steeped in history and fighting that is like fighting water. America’s nation-building at gunpoint - Stripes - Independent U.S. military news from Iraq, Afghanistan and bases worldwide

Sounds like your wife believes in the ridiculous notion that her estimation of your faith determines how you feel about her or how healthy the marriage, aka eternal perspective is. This still astonishes me, some women in the church actually believe that how man acts at church is the same as how the man feels about them. Or perhaps they would rather determine their relationship based on public perception, or a fear of perception. It does sound like she is distancing herself on purpose though, rather than trying to find empathy with your views. Looks like counselling is required to disrupt the myths or resentment train.

Approximately 13 million listed members. My guess would be about 7 million who are actually active with about 3 million with a steady income. 100k is a drop in the lake, considering 10% is required by each member, plus other business dealings. Seems a bit odd to be so extravagant with some things that are only utilized by a small percentage of the actual membership. Sometimes I chuckle when I see advertisement campaigns for charitable donations and wonder how much was spent on advertising, as opposed to actual donations. Of course, my estimations will be disputed, but the rationale still stands. You are not alone with these thoughts.

Sounds good, but you should still keep in mind that your interest in the church should not be just for the sake of some form of independence chip, as they will notice that. I hope you will attempt to convey that you feel that this is an important step for you, rather than an excuse to establish independence.

You're 19 and this would be a good opportunity for you state more of your independence and for them to realize that you are an adult. As stated before, sneaking around the subject only brings more drama.

Jelly is an insult to jam and will always be inferior, even if some people confuse the two. Toast the rye bread and its 2 parts peanut butter to 1 part marmalade, otherwise the jam overwhelms the peanut butter.

Did you submit this rant to your husband? Is he aware of how you feel? Organizations will bleed people dry, even the church and people within the church seem to have an idea that saying no to any requests from church members or the organization is some kind of God rejection. All things in moderation, even church. Its not surprising to see the Bishops family go wild and relationships become strained. My father was a bishop and it happened to us and it will happen again. As for the second poster, everyone needs me time and his golf was probably his only opportunity to seek some peace, but you guilt tripped him out of it, or so that appears which contributed to his stress. Callings within the church require the support of both spouses.

I have heard that tactic of women complaining to me that no one is dating, or that the woman are not being asked out on dates. I even attended a dance where a woman complained incessantly that no one was dancing. Translation, both women can't communicate effectively and try and manipulate the situation so that is always in their favour. You can accuse me of being bitter and I can agree with that, as I bet you could never walk in my shoes and experienced what I have. You can accuse me of not heeding the advice of my superiors, thats fine, as I highly doubt you understand the concept of a lawful command or having the confidence in yourself to not assume that everything you are told is ethical or moral. I think its hilarious that the women justify their lack of understanding in men, by claiming its the men's responsibility to further their wants and needs, then get offended that they aren't asked, while they remain passive. I highly doubt a man, even when "heeded the advice of their leaders" would ask a woman out who plays a game that assures her of the outcome that she wants. If a man played your game, you would discard him as you wouldn't consider him a man. All the women I have been with, played games with me, cheated on me, emotionally, physically and went back to their exes, and yes, they were all mostly Mormon who believed in "heeding their leaders". Excuse me if I don't believe in the fantasy of hypocrisy that seems so prevalent with some cultural expectations.

If you want a date, I wouldn't depend on a stake president's input to get said date. Men don't heed advice from leaders the same as women seem to do and in this case, the direction has good intentions, but its much the same as a meddlesome Branch President matchmaking. I have the opinion that not everything a leader says is gospel or revelation, some of it is their life experience and opinion on life being passed to those young whippersnappers that are of a lazy generation. I know its hypocritical to say this, as I am single, but if you want life to happen, you're going to have to do something about it, not remain passive.

Thanks for validating that I do have an opinion, it means so much to me to told that by someone else on the internet believes I can have an opinion, especially an American. Doesn't change that your comment about baby killers is inflammatory and a disservice to those who consider themselves liberal, regardless of country. Odd that you seem to think being an American is more important than your accusation that liberal thinking equates to baby killer status. For the record and before you accuse me of being liberal, perhaps I am, perhaps I am not.

Thanks dahlia, you just killed the innocent question asking vibe, attached your own country specific interpretation and made this post into a rage induced, soon to be blocked political discussion. Your interpretation of liberal is extreme and asking for a fight, given that most people do not see themselves in the way you have associated. Again, outside of the U.S. liberal means something entirely different than simply....baby killer.

I believe genders are not equal, but they are complimentary, that being said, the woman I seem to meet are quick to point out their expectations, quick to point out any deviations, but offer zero investment of their own because in their mind, they are making the bigger sacrifice or taking the larger risk. Please. I don't object to fair and just treatment and understand a woman's lot in life is different, what I object to is the hypocrisy of expecting males to bend to female expectation and then the woman blaming the man for somehow failing them, while claiming that the man is not a man because they pretend to know what a man is. Even worse is that men are expected to be these manly characters of yesteryear, but how can they be when most of their fathers were neutered after their parents were divorced. Plus, the man is supposed to be this sensitive thoughtful person, who has the time to listen to the woman speak about everything, which is exhausting, but they expect the man to listen like a woman. Best not to date at all, considering she will most likely wage social war if her whims are not satisfied. Then again, I guess I am still single for a reason. Meh, at least I am a unique snowflake of stunning model looks.

Even if that is old fashioned in some kind of nostalgic fantasy, its no wonder men don't ask as often as they are expected to these days, as they are expected to adhere to a biased and gender specific route. Oh, I suppose it has to do with the expectation that the man is the bread winner and the woman is the stay at home mother. Statistically, men are falling rapidly behind women in the scholarly department and with men expected to get a job that can afford to pay for two student debts and everything else, its some kind of indication that the man would do his role by paying for the first date? No wonder there are less dates and most just prefer to hangout, but I suppose that is the man's fault, because they aren't made like they used to be. I am not surprised at all that I didn't feel like asking any women out at church when they had all theses fantasies about what a man should be. Plus, without fail every single meeting of YSA there is a comment about leadership about eternal marriage and that we should be doing it. Nothing more awkward than talking to a woman with the idea that she is thinking about eternal marriage while talking about just a simple date. My point is that gender roles are not as they used to be, expectations have changed and in some ways for the better. Nostalgia and fantasies have no place when you need to learn who the person is.

Your skills that you have developed may languish for awhile, but they will still be there when you get back. I would hazard a guess that you feel more comfortable around computers than people, which can be a handicap when dealing with family, friends or the business life. I did not serve a mission, but I was in the army and inactive when it was all the rage to go and when I reactivated myself, I was sarcastic with those who pushed me to go on a mission because I thought it was a ridiculous idea, considering I have a rather interesting take on the culture and my testimony was shaky. That being said I have been told by others I would have made a good missionary. On a certain level, when I do go to church, I resent how everyone can't stop talking about their mission and the awkward pause when I say I didn't go on one. Or, some woman thinks I am not ideal, because I am not her fantasy Mormon man. Nothing like sitting every Sunday, feeling shunned in some way because I don't share my military stories as everyone breathlessly advertises their coming of age ritual. In some ways, I regret that missed chance, because I have seen what the Mormon manhood ritual does for those kids that are unsure of themselves as they leave the nest. Their self confidence is night and day. The stories I have heard about missionaries, is in stark contrast to the fantasy that is foisted as they are kids with issues going into a stressful environment who bring their own baggage. It seems to me, a lot go because they are expected to, a lot go because it would be shameful not to, a lot go unworthy, a lot break the mission rules, but in the end they come back with a self confidence and self assurance that they didn't possess before they went. Your revelation may not apply as of yet and going on a mission would be one of the hardest things you have done, if not the hardest, but think about the next 60 plus years of your life knowing that you had a chance to help yourself and others, but you didn't take it.