Gabelma

he seems to have done quite well in most countries think his album even sold OK in the US but not sure where - I really like his stuff. Has Robbie Williams made it to any kind of recognition there yet? Charley

Excellent point. Did you ask them to keep it down? I would have. Elphie OK this is my huge soapbox lol For me it depends on the guys and their level of drunkness - but I would also have asked the Mum with a chatty/screaming toddler or baby if she wants some help, have to say every flight I have been on the Steward/esses have offered when my babies or toddler get to that stage. If I go the long way round to LAX by the time I get on the Chicago to Los Angeles flight I have already been flying for 6+ hours and chances are kids have stood in 3 hours worth of ques at Chicago, I just assume the parent ignoring baby is tired and harrassed and needing to block out, or maybe terrified of flying etc 10 minutes with someone else nursing or playing with baby or toddler can make a huge difference. Was it Harold B Lee who helped a Mum with a fractcious child and discovered the Mom was having a threatened miscarriage in an airport que? As a result she didn't miscarry, he helped reduce her stress levels - here if I even get the bus with a baby and fractious toddler, someone will help with my bags and get my daughter on the bus for me, if I got to take a buggy (stroller) up some steps there are generally 5 kind people offering to help. In Chieko Okazaki's book Lighten Up she had a bit about judging a woman who was trying to put on her makeup whilst driving - her intial thought was to wonder why she hadn't done that before, but like she says she didn't know if that woman had managed to look after 5 kids, making lunch, getting them dressed and out the door before hastily getting herself ready. That was something else I noticed is that difference in Southern California, wonder if its because of this obsession that everyone else is going to hurt your child. I have noticed it starting to happen here too but not to same extent find it sad though. When I went for dinner a few weeks ago a group of old ladies &gents had great fun playing pass the baby with my son - he intiated the kisses and cuddles and loved it, they had a great time telling each other and me about my grandkids and how they handled their children - I even ignored the old gentleman who thought my son was teething so rubbed whiskey on his gums... I don't like the way our society is going because people won't accept the help anymore through fear, I wonder between that a families living so far apart if thats why post natel depression rates are so high Charley You sound like a great mother. Elphie I seem to be doing OK so far my kids are doing great - I read a book called the continuum concept when I was at college and it stuck with me that the way people in primitive tribes parent has a lot to teach us - when Iw as in labour with Ellie got a blessing that said to always go with my instincts as they were from Heavenly Father but here in civilised society we tend to lose sight of them. Charley

Actually no I think it might be a society thing i n comparison to rest of Europe Britain is seen as pretty child unfriendly but I have to say I found the American society very stressful and quite rude to a parent with a small child in comparison to what I am used to. I needed to carry so much more in my changing bag - here I can leave and if I need to get nappies(Diapers) and wipes free in a store, there is no doubt a restaurant will have a high chair. Here I can breastfeed my baby where I want and you may get some tuts bt its mostly accepted. Maybe its just me but I felt very watched and very claustrophobic when I was out with Ellie. I personally think both my children at very young ages were very good because they came everywhere with me I still conduct business meetings with a baby in a sling. A baby carried a lot, kept at the centre of daily life and kept as close as possible has no need to cry so doesn't cry a lot. My daughter for a 4 year old is very well behaved and my son is no bother to take anywhere both my kids are very portable. Charley

It is awful what some people will do hope you don't mind me asking where you friends with the people you were staying with? its part of the reason I have chosen to home educate my kids, and why I am stopping my daughter play with the children in our street I think they try to treat her like that so I have stopped it - I was talking to a Mum at the home ed group and we were talking about why she had chosen to home educate she has such amazing children- she said the youngest had come home from nursery one day and said he didn't like the people there and could he stay home so he did. She had assumed the older two would want to stay at school they were both at top of their classes academically, good at sport and very popular - but they asked to stay home too - she was surprised they never wanted to call their school friends - they told her that at school they had to have friends but they didn't really like them that much they weren't people they wanted to spend time with now they had a choice. I guess because I was a bit of a nerdy kid - I only ever had really great friends being the odd one out and different I guess has its advantages I never got invited to a sleepover that would have gone like that. I am aware I need to watch my daughter because she likes to please too much Charley

Almom, You're not going to push for me to be kicked off, right?? :) As for shut up, I don't think it is a bad word. A##$%*& is a bad word, as are several other. Shut up isn't bad to me. Sorry... As for judgemental tone, I could say the same about the way people assume the mother was all holy and light and the stew as PMSing, etc. We weren't there. I totally agree. I gave it as my OPINION that the kid was yelling (screaming), the mom was oblivious, and that many passengers had had it. Also, I consider the source. A distraught mom. WSB TV out of Atlanta, which is always looking for some bad guy big corporate type (I watched Fox 5 in ATL), so I take it as VERY slanted to show how bad this stew was and the kid and mom are next to the Madonna statue in holiness. Sorry, I've flown too much, and the examples of kids behaving on planes are few at best. My jaded perspective, perhaps, but kids should be taught to be respectful of others, and that certain behaviors are not acceptable in public. That is sorely lacking today. If the parent and child aren't used to flying you can't expect their behaviour to great and practised or to automatically know what to do. Or representative of how they would be at home. And no I would not drug a child on a flight - in fact Doctors here advise against it and will not prescribe - especially a flight over 4 hours as it can cause a lot of serious problems I have flown and used the train a lot and as a child, Mum and a single person- my daughter screamed her head off on one flight and even threw up on the gentleman sitting next to me she was a year old and we couldn't do anything to stop it, I guess the gentleman next to me took the same attitude as myself and the people around me were wonderful. Turned out my daughter had a nasty dose of food poisoning. On the return flight I had a miscarriage and was in full blown labour - again people were amazing I am sure I was not great to be sitting near that time. Remember as a child my brother laughing his head off during a particularly bad episode of turbulance - the adults around him were panicking bet it got on their nerves to him it was like a fairground ride. But then I have sat next to people with BO, people who were legless (drunk), sat in carrriages and a flight with a bunch of Welsh Rugby players singing rather interesting songs, kids who played up etc If you want it nice pay the extra and fly first class, if not you takes what you get - never forget the guy I sat next to who farted and perspired and panicked the whole 6 hours. He was a nice guy just terrified. Then there are the people who think its OK to put a chair reclined backwards into your lap for the whole 11 hours Charley

I love the name Elphie if it wasn't so close to Ellie I'd be considering it if we didn't have another daughter Not sure I had assumed it was because they were professional dancers being asked to go freestyle at least the girls in the fancy dresses. My brother makes me up CDs to make me feel good in the mornings when I get dressed - I listen to songs like Big Girls are Beautiful and Fat Bottomed Girls lol just makes me feel good going out and I do pretty much move the way I used too. I am losing weight but more because of my Fibromyalgia its putting too much pressure on my knees - not sure I want to be very skinny again got used to my body this way and I tend to dress for it. Charley

sorry my fault I guess I forget that prayer isn't a given, I have just done it all my life so its normal lol I always feel a bit gobsmacked when i mention an answer to a prayer and some people think I should take them more seriously. Again being able to take something you learned back to the source and say Heavenly Father did it really happen this way is also very liberating. Did you notice that nearly all of the Lords Prayer at least to me seems to form the part of repentance? I also wondered why the differences between the Lords Prayer in the Book of Mormon and Bible interesting what is your take on that? Charley

My Dad retiried comfortably at 50 by paying off his mortgage and selling his house and moving into smaller accomadation, he then took voluntary redundancy, which gave him a tidy sum. This made him comfortable enough until his company pension kicked in at 55, he then took on a small Saturday job which gives him his pocket money then at 65 his State Pension and free bus pass kicked in. He manages 3 foreign holidaays a year and 4 women as well as 4 kids and 8 grandkids Charley

this is where being a good parent comes in Annabelli is right you do your homework - you can't guarantee safety but you can do your best to assure situations like you describe don't happen. I would never let my daughter go to a home where I hadn't met the parents, ie invited them round for dinner and been to theirs - I am uncomfortable about some friendships she has right now so we are steering her away from them. And you teach your kids to make good friendships and keep lines of communication open if I was molested I could have told my Mum, she was an alchololic and has gone slightly nuts in later years but was one of the best parents, she had a good balance. By the time I was old enough for sleepovers I would never have stayed in the situations you describe - my brother did but ultimately Mum has steered him out of the mess he made for himself. My brother had stricter rules as a result and Mum always made sure the other kid slept over at our house first - she was more liberal with me because she trusted me not too. Because she was open and very honest about sex from when I was about 4 noone was able to entice me it was my decision what I did - same goes with my brother. I want my children to be confident, outgoing and able to take care of themselves when they go into the adult world. So I have to let go of the apron strings bit by bit as they are ready. They are going to face temptations and trials I can't stop that would love to but also know they need them to grow - Charley

What an absolutely fantastic idea thank you if I start now I may just do it by time I am 41 lol - I did something similar chapter by chapter in the Book of Mormon and it was fantastic, I had been baptised 13 years when i realised that whilst I had always assued the Book of Mormon was the word of God I had never actually asked him, and began to build my testimony chapter by chapter. I agree with your other 2 paragraphs - I found my education is greatly enriched by having a bench mark to refer too - without it there are too many ifs, buts, maybes and whys. And also that as I grow scriptures mean different things to me - I was not wrong before just my understanding increased. Kind of like when I studied physics at degree level they told me to more or less forget what I had learned at school - or when I studied history I discovered dates and timlines that were accepter at school were debatable at uni. I need the scripture in my life to be very much the iron rod and unbendable because the more I learn in my studies the less I actually know about anything. Charley

I personally believe Jesus was capable of feeding the 5000 from 5 loaves and 2 fishes. I don't know if its all 100% accurate but I do know there is nothing wrong with me reading it literally. Same goes for the Book of Mormon - I have yet to read anything that convinces me it didn't happen so I will obey the teachings and imagine the people as real people unless the Lord himself tells me otherwise lol If I am honest its not a question I tend to consider very often - I read it and take it as literal but I do with the New Testament as well. the Old Testament I tend to struggle more with. But I am much further removed from Stone Age man I think its more a lack of understanding and empathy than of taking it literally. Charley

There are plenty of people who feel the way you do - maybe its just because my friends and I didn't get upto anything we would be ashamed if our parents found out, but I do think its important to trust your children. The only reactionary parents in our group of friends belonged to the one friend that went wild at university. As a Youth and Young Single Adult sleepovers were a huge part of what kept me active because they were what allowed me to travel and meet other Youth and Young Single Adults. I have very fond memories as a Young Single Adult of sleeping on the floor of a friends living room with 11 other women, with 5 men upstairs in the tiny bedroom - also remember the men used up all the bathroom time lol - similar things happened a Youth. One of my closest friends I have had since high school is male - even had sleepovers at his house. I feel that its my job to teach my children but I also need to know when to let them go. And to trust them I feel children need to be respected and trusted to become trustworthy adults. They are not some weird alien subspecies they are actually small humans with an ability to make the right decisions if taught to do so. My Mum was very open about sex and I am very comfortable in my own body, when I made the decision not to have sex and remain chaste I did it with my eyes open - I want the same for my kids, my daughter already knows the basics about sex and babies as it came up looking at a 4D scan book when i was pregnant with my son. I personally am very fussy about who babysits my kids only my parents, my Mother in Law, brother and bestfriend are allowed and even then I do not do it very often and my daughter has only ever stayed over at even Granny's once or twice. However do get to the point when I will have to take that chance that time will come when I know my daughter is old enough to say no or we have an open enough relationship that she can tell me if something did happen to her. Charley

I was surprised that the US doesn't do more direct banking an awful lot of people pay directly by cheque I would miss the conveinience of that if we moved over - that and an electric kettle, duvets, gravy and custard lol Charley we do have electric kettles, and duvets. don't know about the gravy and custard though [/quotebWWE Not to the same extent - the same ones are very expensive and not the same range Charley

But that's impossible because that's my husband! Canuck, I wish you guys much happiness in your marriage. You telling me my fella is a bigamist lol - sheesh I thought he was perfect bloke Charley

[Actually that used tobe a major difference until recently and may be changing back at least in Scotland because our NHS is part of a whole Welfare System that used to include free univeristy education - our Doctors dont leave school in quite the same level of debt and our Doctors can come from any background. The latest government has made this more difficult but glad to see they are starting to redress the balance with the new Prime Minsiter. I left university with what was less than $6,000 worth of debt our nurses should leave with even less. Charley

I was thining about you today Susie we were eating out and you just popped into my mind. There is no reason why a newly weaning baby can't be done on fruit and veg we had a lot of contoversy with cereals here at one point so my son got fruit some quick easy thing at least in the UK baby food has less regulations on it than adult food so for example a baby rusk can contain as much sugar as a jam doughnut. Some things we do are use the Innocent Smoothies they don't have added sugar so are better than the fruit in a jar and taste better lol One of the easiest food is mashed potato. You can chew the food yourself and give it to the baby - I am slowly learning you don't need to spend hours doing homemade stuff now know number 3 won't have to have anything from a jar Last night we had a japanese meal - I chewed the lamb for him and he managed the rice and melon on his own. http://babyledweaning.blogware.com/ Here is an article on Baby Led Weaning I've done mostly this with both of my children whilst also doing some spoon feeding, but have yet to use a puree with either of mine unless its part of the food Charley

WHat a lovely thing to read today - thank you for posting it - Charley

Ginger and Meditation both are fantastic - I can give you some basic meditation techniques if you like. Ginger helps with pain and blood flow Charley

The NHS isn't free - we pay national insurance my Husband, Grandparents, Parents have all paid it at great amounts, because of my illness I haven't paid much but I still get looked after. Its very easy to be blase about a welfare state when you don't need it. I see what my ancestors went through when they fell on hard times and I really feel awful for them.... I had an incredibly comfortable financial childhood, then at 14 my parents divorced and within 2 years I was homeless - I have now been homeless 3 times, if I had been in the US my illness wouln't have been looked after, and I would probably still be homeless. Instead I have a reasonably OK furture a decent home and I can attend college - so hopefully my money will then help others in a similar situation. I remember having an interesting conversation like this with an LDS businessman I talked to him on and off online for about 4 years at the beginning of those 4 years he was very anti welfare state and oh how he was subisdising all those spongers etc - when his business went belly up he was very disillusioned, last time I spoke to him he and his family were moving into a car. That is unlikely to have happened here - it would have been hard but he would have had a better chance to rebuild. I would much rather subsidise 10 spongers and have the 1 honest person on hard times looked after. The people that sponge after all leave jobs open to us that want to rebuild. Today I had a wonderful experience in an NHS hospital - I was seen within 20 minutes on a walk in appointment on a busy day, and my son was looked after - I was then shown how to look after his wound and sent home with a pile of stuff so that if somehing similar happened I could stop the bleeding before I brought him in. OK its not great but to me its just seems fairer. And it also means that our PRIVATE healthcare is fantastic because it is subisdised by the State system - There is nothing better than a Doctor who is completely dedicted to the NHS Charley

LOL I know what you mean this year in North Scotland was lovely and whilst the rest of the country is wealthier its sinking into the sea Charley

You could always go private being a foreign national you would have to pay anyway or have some kind of private health insurance - you wouldn't be using the NHS except for emergency treatment anyway and that is generally very good - certainly much superior to that I experienced in the US and that is with me having good insurance. And if you fallen in ill in Edinburgh you would have been well taken care of the NHS in Scotland is generally better than the rest of the country as we are not so overpopulated. It would depend on what your son haas and the area you are in to a point how well he will be looked after - but I will say this the care you will recive in an NHS hospital will be far superior to anything my father in law recieved at UCLA medical centre. My husband has experienced both and was very right wing American now he ain't so sure he wants to go back - now if we could get more dentists it would be perfect And I will say if your wife gets pregnant whilst here she would receive much better care even in our worst areas Charley

I would love to go to Peru and Mexico. And Northern Part of Japan, Hong Kong, and Toowoomba near Brisbane Australia and fancy New Zealand In the US want to visit San Diego again, and again lol Seattle and New England and New York and Montana And in the UK really want to visit Newcastle, the Orkney Islands, Isle of Man and Channel Islands. And I want to take my kids to Liverpool Europe I want to go to Italy and Iceland. And I feel I ought to visit Auschwitz. And want to do Vienna, Budapest and Prague. Africa want to go to Togo and Durban to see the penguins Charley

I agree Ben One thing my life has taughtt me is there are worse things than death - when Cardinal Basil Hume (head of RC Church in England) announced to his best friend he was dying - his friend said 'congratulations, lucky you' I thought that was fantastic his attitude was that we are here in order to return home to God. When we die or Heavenly Father allows us to go he welcoming us further along the path back to him, if we were to kill someone we are ending the only life that even those of us with Faith really understand Charley

I love stuff like that I find staring at up close shots or models of DNA one of the best spiritual highs I can get Charley

I was brought up in a family where most of the people could remember the days pre NHS - and I was taught to be very respectful of the welfare state. My familys fortunes have been a roller coaster ride and it is so good to have that safety net when you need it. Charley