my two cents

I suggest setting aside your feelings and really look at the cultural differences. I also strongly recommend getting and reading 'It's Just My Nature' by Carol Tuttle (huge help in any kind of relationship!!). 

We talked to the bishop and I already feel LOADS better! Thanks everyone for your loving and kind words of encouragement, and giving me the extra little push I needed to come clean. 

It really does sound like you need to talk to someone and I agree with @Sunday about reaching out to the stake pres instead. Going through a little discomfort for a short time is way better than feeling the way you do for a lifetime. 

I visited with 2 aunts and 2 uncles over the weekend who are staying in a 2-bedroom vacation condo.  We walked into this beach condo on the Atlantic ocean and I immediately felt like I was back in my hometown in the Philippines.  They had this tiny kitchen with a 2-burner stove and they were working together preparing dinner.  One burner was grilling burgers the other burner was frying chicken, a rice cooker was steaming in one corner of the tiny countertop.  Somebody was washing pots, plates, and utensils as fast as people were dumping them in the tiny sink.  I went to join the fray, to start making fresh lumpia.  The uncle grilling the burgers would hear the cheers on TV and go take a look and somebody steps in to finish the burgers, then the aunt frying the chicken would join in on a conversation and somebody else takes over the frying pan and then she'd walk away from the conversation, and find out her spot at the frying pan is taken, so she goes to the vacated sink and wash dishes and then starts rolling fresh lumpia with me... it's like everybody just knows what the end result is gonna be, so everybody just pitches in where they can until it is accomplished.
So, we sit down to dinner and nobody can claim they made any of the dishes because... everybody made them.
 
I don't know who to tag that hasn't been tagged.  Has @a mustard seed been tagged?  How about @Grunt?
 

I don't know if this counts, but my spouse performs acts of service every single day.  I have no idea how she holds this family together as well as she does.  

Hmmm. You know bishops are really not that scary. I would certainly prefer to go see the bishop rather than give up the celestial kingdom.
But if your bishop has you terrified, how about seeing your stake president instead?
if you can't face that, then you and Heavenly Father need to have a talk. Pour out your soul to him. Perhaps read scriptures first. Make a few notes about what you want to say first. Be respectful if possible. Good luck!

False dichotomy.  Of course choosing not to go on a mission is discouraged.  That is not the same as discouraging military service.  A return missionary who chooses military service would get a much different reaction.

I've been a member of the Church my entire life, and I have never heard anything, doctrine or otherwise, that suggests military service is discouraged.  On the contrary, I have always been taught in Church to honor our veterans and those currently serving in the military.  While we are a church of peace, we also recognize that there are times when war is necessary, hence, The Mormon Battalion.

About 6 months ago, I found 2 families of about 6 each. They are now all baptized, most are endowed  
family history is so great!!

A similar thing happened to my last car. I was on my way to a job interview when I rear ended someone at a stop light. One of those silly ones where the light to go straight turns green before the left turn light, and I was turning left. Since it was a trailer on a pickup truck versus the hood of my Pontiac Sunfire, I lost. After being assured there was no bodily harm, the guy drove off without taking my insurance info. I know they say never to admit blame, but my integrity said otherwise.
I immediately called and rescheduled my interview and pulled off into a parking lot to wait for a tow. (Busted radiator.) The guy behind me happened to be a minister for a local mega church and kept me company while waiting for the police and tow truck to arrive. Really a very nice guy, and if I hadn't already had a place of worship, I probably would have become involved in with his church. 
After it was all said and done, my car was considered totaled and I managed to get a check for $2700 but told the repair place not to bother repainting the hood and a couple of other cosmetic repairs, saving a hefty chunk of the check. Obviously, I thought it was an immediate blessing, even though I ended up not getting the job. The job I ended up getting was more compatible with my temple worker schedule and also easier for me to leave when the opportunity to move was before me. I literally would not be on the couch I'm on and in the apartment I'm in had that scene been omitted from the story of my life.

I have a small "homestead" where I grow/raise a good portion of my food.  It really depends on how they grow/raise their products.  There are different types and levels of "organic".  I don't certify ANY of my food as organic, however, I free range or pasture, don't use chemicals, antibiotics, artificial fertilizer, synthetic feed, etc.  I'm probably more organic than many things labeled "organic".  
I don't know anything about Winder Farms specifically, but I would certainly ask where they source their products then research those.  CSA's are big up this way.  Do you have those?  You're typically getting a great product through most that I've seen.

I totally get this. There are literally zero active singles within ten years and twenty miles of me. My last known home teacher suddenly moved to Utah about two months ago. I've been in the YW Presidency since March, and have spent about half of my three years in this branch as the Primary Music Leader. 
The friends I've found here have come through service, either me serving them or by allowing them to serve me. Even the free spirited three year old I consider one of my favorite friends came about because I'd give her, her younger sister, and her pregnant mom rides home after church so their dad could go to work. I'd end up hanging out for a humble lunch and sometimes a movie. I took on the role of "sacrament meeting nanny" and sit in rows or with families where the adult to child ratio needs some balance, especially if you see Mom is giving a talk that day. Carpooling is a great service vehicle. Ask someone if you can ride with them to stake conference, carpool to your VT assignments with your companion. 
I wish I could remember where I read/heard this, but this mortal life is meant to be a little lonely from time to time. Not only does it help us yearn for heaven a little too, but if we allow it, our own lonliness can help us recognize that feeling in others.
As far as the ups and downs go, it's like climbing Mt. Everest. There are built in plateaus that allow climbers to acclimate themselves to the changes in altitudes. Same goes for living the Gospel. These times can be  tough but necessary. This December was the first time in ten years I missed more than two consecutive Sundays. Quite honestly, I was incredibly depressed; enough so that I called the suicide help line. Even though I had no intention of ending my life, I wanted nothing more than for it to be over. I had gradually fallen out of daily prayer and scripture study, and from there, the rest of my life spun out from under me. Only within the past few months have I started back with the regular prayer and scripture reading (still not quite up to them both happening every day), and even little steps make a difference.

Welcome to the forum!
 I suppose it depends on what you mean by "staying active." For me, there's a difference between being active in the Church and active in the Gospel. They usually go hand in hand, but it's possible to miss out on a few sacrament meetings due to circumstances and still remain active in the gospel. It's equally possible to attend every Sunday meeting and calendar activity but not be active in the gospel. 
I have no perspective on remaining active in the church while in the military (other than having a somewhat transient feeling in the stake due to a nearby Air Force base assigning and reassigning LDS families). When it comes to remaining active in the gospel, it's probably not much different than in any other circumstance: if you make a conscious decision ahead of time to remain faithful and diligent in your daily prayer and scripture study, you'll probably pass any test of faith.
You may benefit from reading up on some of the personal histories of Apostles/prophets who have served in the military. 

Sealed a family of 9! Did 7 at once! Very crowded! My ancestors. Most exciting!

@Snigmorder
I said this either in my post above or on a previous thread, but getting a grasp of what is happening and memorizing where in the Book of Mormon it is was my first step toward scripture mastery (or as they now call it, 'doctrinal mastery').
I have become very good at a game called "Book of Mormon Basball", a popular scripture game on my mission. Without explaining the mechanics of the game, it is where two people go back and forth reading one random scripture and the other has the guess what chapter it is in within 3 guesses.
At first I thought it was a rediculous feat to accomplish. However, simply knowing the basic events of each book and roughly what chapters they occur in, what each sermon given covers, and the characters involved, one can become quite a scriptorian.
so first thing is first. Figure out what is going on in each book, what chapters cover which war, where does Alma and Amulek begin and end their work in Ammonihah, where does Alma gather together his force of mighty missionaries and speak to the people of Antionum (the Zoramites), etc.
Something I have done twice was make a BOM timeline going through every book and chapter. I wrote a 1-2 sentence summary of what was going on, scripture masteries and scriptures that were special to me, and what event it coincided with. This helped me a TON! It does take time, but all good things do.

I get what you're saying but an option would be to go to the scriptures online and type in the keyword and then turn to them and mark them. Marking and studying don't have to be done at the same time.

Remembered another one from days gone by but it has a great message - 
The Greatest - Kenny Rogers

You might want to check google and/or there are some books available (I got the one below years ago). Aside from that, I had an institute teacher suggest that every time you see the word 'remember', mark it in red so it stands out and gets your attention like a red flag. 
https://www.amazon.com/Marking-scriptures-Suggestions-understanding-using/dp/0877478155

You might want to check google and/or there are some books available (I got the one below years ago). Aside from that, I had an institute teacher suggest that every time you see the word 'remember', mark it in red so it stands out and gets your attention like a red flag. 
https://www.amazon.com/Marking-scriptures-Suggestions-understanding-using/dp/0877478155

So my wife and I are newly weds, both off our missions for only a year and pretty poor (though I feel we are doing better than most college students).
A week or so ago I took our little fiat into the shop to get the oil changed and get new tires. They then pointed out 3 different parts of the car that needed fixing. All pretty obvious (like my back left wheel wiggling and slowly coming apart). The price to fix these essential parts were going to range from $600-$1000. My wife and I were pretty stressed out. We would not be going into debt, but the price would drain our savings as well as a bit of our money we are going to use on our honeymoon in August. But because of promises made in my patriarchal blessing, I decided to be patient, gained hope and chose not to be devastated.
But then the miracle happened!
The very next day my wife took our other car (The shop told us not to drive long distance and the wiggly tire was enough to convince me they were right) to see some friends and family. On her way home she was rear ended On the freeway! She was totally fine, only minor cosmetic damage on the car, and now the insurance claim is enough to pay for her car repairs!
God watches over all of us guys! 

Meanwhile, how did we manage to get 22 pages in without talking about the real LDS culture problem: green Jello with shredded stuff in it? 

Well then before you buy the ticket, google '100 questions to ask before you get married' and be totally honest with each other about them. You also need a pro/con list of this relationship with everything on the table (where will you live/raise a family, how often will you visit the other family, what do you enjoy doing together, etc). You also both need to read the book I suggested above as well as 'The 5 Love Languages' (check your library). The more you know going in, the better! 

Remembered another one from days gone by but it has a great message - 
The Greatest - Kenny Rogers

These are lovely! Thank you.

I don't listen to much country and these aren't the most recent but they'd work for vt:
Thank God for Kids
I Believe There Are Angels Among Us