PrinceofLight2000 Posted March 4, 2011 Report Posted March 4, 2011 Not too soon, just too much or too often. I don't really have an opinion on it, so naturally I'm wondering what yours are. Also, before anyone asks, this isn't an issue for me. lol. I'm just the data collector. Quote
Dravin Posted March 4, 2011 Report Posted March 4, 2011 (edited) Not too soon, just too much or too often. I don't really have an opinion on it, so naturally I'm wondering what yours are. Also, before anyone asks, this isn't an issue for me. lol. I'm just the data collector.I imagine impact may diminish if it is crazily over used, I imagine mostly because sincerity could diminish or at least be perceived to diminish if you are saying "I love you" to each other every 5 minutes and it becomes rote. For instance a "Luv ya babe" as you head out the door is different than looking her in the eyes and saying "I love you", and if you are doing it every 5 minutes I imagine you'd tend towards the former. But every couple is different and the stages of the relationship change things, during the infatuation stage you could probably stare into each others eyes and just confess your love for each other every 5 minutes without it getting old. After 25 years of marriage? Probably not so much. Edited March 4, 2011 by Dravin Quote
Guest Posted March 4, 2011 Report Posted March 4, 2011 If said with sincerity you can't say it too much. I say it to the kids and the kids say it to me at least 10 times a day. In addition, I say it to my husband and him back to me everytime we hang up the phone... so that's at about 15 times or so a day... I say it to my parents after every conversation, etc. etc. etc. No, it doesn't get old. Just like it doesn't get old to thank Heavenly Father 5 times a day... Quote
Guest jengilbrat Posted March 4, 2011 Report Posted March 4, 2011 I don't think you can say it too much, as long as it is sincere and all. Unless it becomes, sorta creepy stalker-ish.....then I guess it could be sincere and scary all at once....ok, never mind. Quote
Wingnut Posted March 5, 2011 Report Posted March 5, 2011 It can become cloying with overuse. Just ask my husband. Quote
slamjet Posted March 5, 2011 Report Posted March 5, 2011 The consequences are pretty dire if it's not said enough, if at all. Quote
Guest Alana Posted March 5, 2011 Report Posted March 5, 2011 I suppose it could begin to be seen as a way to be told "I love you" in return and to feel loved rather than expressing ones love. If I were to say it about 3 times more often than I do, my husband wouldn't doubt I love him in general, or at the moment that I was saying it, but he might start to think I was saying it just to say it, not because I'm thinking about how much I actually love him. Quote
apexviper13 Posted March 13, 2011 Report Posted March 13, 2011 Nope. You can only say it too little. Quote
Dravin Posted March 13, 2011 Report Posted March 13, 2011 (edited) Nope. You can only say it too little.I dunno. Saying it to women/men other than your spouse* could potential qualify as saying it too much. * Excluding of course things like friends and family, I'm talking romantically. Edited March 13, 2011 by Dravin Quote
Soulsearcher Posted March 13, 2011 Report Posted March 13, 2011 I dunno. Saying it to women/men other than your spouse* could potential qualify as saying it too much. * Excluding of course things like friends and family, I'm talking romantically.Saying it too much romantically to friends isn't good either....trust me lol Quote
john doe Posted March 13, 2011 Report Posted March 13, 2011 Here's hoping my wife and kids never tire of hearing it from me. Quote
pam Posted March 13, 2011 Report Posted March 13, 2011 I never tire of hearing you say it JD. Oh wait..you never say it to me. :) Quote
apexviper13 Posted March 13, 2011 Report Posted March 13, 2011 I dunno. Saying it to women/men other than your spouse* could potential qualify as saying it too much. * Excluding of course things like friends and family, I'm talking romantically.I'm referring to just saying it to the spouse. Quote
Dravin Posted March 13, 2011 Report Posted March 13, 2011 I'm referring to just saying it to the spouse.Yes I know, I was making a funny. Thus the wink. Quote
pam Posted March 13, 2011 Report Posted March 13, 2011 I love you Dravin. In a purely platonic sort of way of course. :) Quote
Dravin Posted March 13, 2011 Report Posted March 13, 2011 I love you Dravin. In a purely platonic sort of way of course. :)I love you too Pam. Of course in my case it's in a purely gastronomic sort of way.Baked goods.... yum. :) Quote
Wingnut Posted March 13, 2011 Report Posted March 13, 2011 Yes I know, I was making a funny. Thus the wink.I made a funny too, and included a wink. Apparently I was the only one who thought it was funny, though. Quote
Backroads Posted March 13, 2011 Report Posted March 13, 2011 Eh, I think that trying to reserve it only for the most special occasions is even worse than overuse. It brings to mind an episode of "The King of Queens" in which the couple were chatting on the phone. The phone call ended with half-hearted "love ya". Immediately, the husband called back and gave his wife the idea of cutting back on "I love yous" with the idea that it might make it more meaningful. They agreed on this and then gave each other heartfelt "I love yous"... and then once again ended the phone conversation with rote "love ya". Quote
slamjet Posted March 13, 2011 Report Posted March 13, 2011 I can remember towards the end of my marriage how much I missed hearing that phrase. Now, I have to call my kids to hear it. Quote
classylady Posted March 13, 2011 Report Posted March 13, 2011 One of my old boyfriends used to tell me he loved me, I thought way too much. And I felt smothered. Years later I found out that he has bi-polar issues that he wasn't aware of at the time we were dating. So maybe he meant it at the time, but it was too much for me. I thought I loved him too, but because of feeling so overwhelmed with his love, and I don't mean the physical, I ended the relationship. His love almost scared me. After my daughter died in a car accident, our family is much more verbal in our show of affection. Also, there are a lot more hugs. Whenever anyone goes out the door, we always tell each other "I love you". And we mean it. I didn't get the chance to tell my daughter "Good-bye, I love you" before she left on her trip when the accident happened. And eight years later I still regret it. Silly of me, I know. I was working. But still, the regret is there. Quote
mightynancy Posted March 13, 2011 Report Posted March 13, 2011 I'm with Alana on this one. If you're saying it spontaneously, that's one thing. If you're saying it only because you want to hear it back, it's needy and a little manipulative. If a person doesn't feel like he's hearing it enough, he should just come out and say so.A friend and I have this running joke - a relative of hers does the manipulative "I love you." Every now and then, one of us will burst out with, "I love you... ... ... I said, I LOVE YOU." Quote
slamjet Posted March 13, 2011 Report Posted March 13, 2011 One daughter of mine, when she was three, tried the "I Love You" phrase to get out of bed-time. Didn't work. She learned after a few tries. Quote
findingmyway Posted March 13, 2011 Report Posted March 13, 2011 I love you .... thats to whoever needed to hear it. Quote
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