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My husband was excommunicated a few years ago. Has since been re-baptized and is waiting to hear back on his blessings being restored. We had a baby after he was rebaptized but blessings had not been restored. We’re told our son is not born in the covenant and needs to be sealed to us. 
 

I’m really confused as to why that is because I have kept my covenants. Shouldn’t my son be sealed to me? It feels as though my son and I are being punished for my husband’s transgressions. And what would happen if my husband decided he didn’t want to be a member of the church anymore. My son would never be sealed to me, nor would our future children? 

Edited by bnthome

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Your son cannot be sealed to you alone. That is not what a sealing means. Your son can be sealed only to parentS<--note the plural. A child born within his parents' covenant is called "born in the covenant" (BIC), and receives many blessings from that. Your son was not born within the covenant of yours and your husband's sealing, because that sealing did not exist at the moment he was born.

If a child is sealed to his/her parents, the wording of that sealing makes it clear that the child's status is identical with that of a child born in the covenant. That is, being BIC is the "natural" way that the Lord provides these blessings, but those who are sealed after birth suffer no damage by comparison. They are exactly the same before God.

Once your child is sealed within his parents' marital covenant, that status is permanent so long as the child remains worthy (i.e. in adulthood). The status of the parents is no longer directly relevant to the child's status; he remains sealed to his parents regardless of his parents' subsequent actions, even if they should have their sealing dissolved.

tl;dr—No, this is not a "punishment" for you or your son. It's the definition of what it means to be sealed to parents.

Edited by Vort

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21 minutes ago, bnthome said:

My husband was excommunicated a few years ago. Has since been re-baptized and is waiting to hear back on his blessings being restored. We had a baby after he was rebaptized but blessings had not been restored. We’re told our son is not born in the covenant and needs to be sealed to us. 
 

I’m really confused as to why that is because I have kept my covenants. Shouldn’t my son be sealed to me? It feels as though my son and I are being punished for my husband’s transgressions. And what would happen if my husband decided he didn’t want to be a member of the church anymore. My son would never be sealed to me, nor would our future children? 

bnthome, may I respectfully ask what you think it means to be “sealed” to your children?

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Hi @bnthome, I'm an LDS Christian lady married a great generic Christian dude.  We have a little daughter.  

Ultimately, all covenants are about a person embracing Christ & His ways: they want to be that upright person, walk in His ways, have the goodness that comes from it.  It is first and foremost a matter of heart, with actions following that.  My husband is a great person and husband, but he's not yet formally taken on Christ's name and stepped up to that plate.  

Therefore, today we are not yet sealed.  Because we as a couple are not yet sealed, today our little girl is also not yet sealed to us (parents bond has to come first).  

What tomorrow holds is not yet know to us mortals.  But I do have faith that my husband will eventually come to fully embrace Christ, formally take on His name, and formally make covenants with Him.  It just hasn't happened yet today.  And that "tomorrow" is probably not a literal 24 hours from now.  It may not even be during this mortal life.  But I do have faith that it will happen, because I have faith in God and the good man I know my husband is.  

 

Likewise is the case with every other person on this Earth: they'll all have the opportunity to come to Christ and be formally one with Him/each other.  Whether that comes in this life or the next.  

Edited by Jane_Doe

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17 minutes ago, Just_A_Guy said:

bnthome, may I respectfully ask what you think it means to be “sealed” to your children?

I guess I’m talking about the blessings he could be missing out on if his father doesn’t choose the covenant path. I understand things will be worked out in the eternities. 
 

“Those who shall hereafter rule and reign in eternity as exalted beings will form a patriarchal chain which will begin with Father Adam and spread out until every exalted person is linked in. Exaltation consists in the continuation of the family unit in eternity, and every family which so continues will find its proper place in the eternal organizational framework which the Almighty has ordained. None will be forgotten. Unworthy mortal links will be dropped in eternity, for there is no family in which all generations will attain exaltation; later generations of worthy families will be welded into the links formed by their ancestors who became worthy of a like exaltation with them.” (Bruce R. McConkie, Mormon Doctrine, p.558)

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@bnthome I can understand your concern.  I was excommunicated about 8 months ago.  You're right, things will work out in eternity. 

My wife really struggled the first few months with not being sealed.  We have 'missed' some things.  I was not able to baptize my son when he turned 8 this year.  I couldn't give my kids back to school blessings.  We had to call a local bishop for a blessing when my wife got sick on vacation.  But each of these, have given other people opportunities to serve.  My kids have been able to see extended family and ward members exercise the priesthood power.  When I told them about being ex'ed, and explained that eventually I'll get baptized again, she excitedly asked if she could be a witness.  (I'm choking up now just remembering how touching that was).  

The Lord will take care of you, your kid(s), and your husband.  In this life, not just the eternities.

https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2006/04/broken-things-to-mend?lang=eng 

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7 hours ago, dprh said:

@bnthome I can understand your concern.  I was excommunicated about 8 months ago.  You're right, things will work out in eternity. 

My wife really struggled the first few months with not being sealed.  We have 'missed' some things.  I was not able to baptize my son when he turned 8 this year.  I couldn't give my kids back to school blessings.  We had to call a local bishop for a blessing when my wife got sick on vacation.  But each of these, have given other people opportunities to serve.  My kids have been able to see extended family and ward members exercise the priesthood power.  When I told them about being ex'ed, and explained that eventually I'll get baptized again, she excitedly asked if she could be a witness.  (I'm choking up now just remembering how touching that was).  

The Lord will take care of you, your kid(s), and your husband.  In this life, not just the eternities.

https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2006/04/broken-things-to-mend?lang=eng 

What a great attitude towards the power of repentance and forgiveness.  It's refreshing to read something positive regarding this situation rather than the bitterness.

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