kona0197 Posted March 10, 2008 Report Posted March 10, 2008 You might wonder why after all the things I've said here about investigating the church why I haven't joined the Church. I would like to join. The fact is I just can't. You see it mostly has to do with the Social Security laws. The laws state that should my girlfriend and I get married she would lose her income. She is on Social Security. I only make about 700 a month at work therefore we need that income to survive. The church says we can not become members until we get married as we live together. So as you see I can't become a member. I am NOT willing to let her lose her income and become a member just to end up homeless. So flame on.... I still think the church asks to much of us.
Alaskagain Posted March 10, 2008 Report Posted March 10, 2008 My knee-jerk reaction is: It isn't the church that's asking, it is the Lord. Obviously, you love your girlfriend's money more than you love the Lord. Very judgemental on my part, and I am truly sorry, but I want to be totally honest that I really did think that for a moment. That is probably what you expected by "flame on". Now I am repenting for it, and asking for forgiveness, from you and from my Heavenly Father. Obviously, you love your girlfriend very much, and are concerned for her welfare. What a test for you! I am happy that you have gained enough of a testimony that you would like to join the church, even though you feel you cannot do this under your current circumstances. Is there any way you can find a job that pays you better, or take a school course that would train you for a better paying job? I hope that you will be able to find a solution. The Lord has a way of making things work out. Sometimes not right away. I encourage you to continue learning more about the gospel and doing things to help your testimony and faith grow. Mostly, I encourage you to keep reaching for a personal relationship with your Heavenly Father and know that he loves you and hears your prayers.
WANDERER Posted March 10, 2008 Report Posted March 10, 2008 Ugh...wish the Social Security rules were different and more family friendly.
butongrl Posted March 10, 2008 Report Posted March 10, 2008 The church can and will help you if this is truly the desire of your heart. We are in a situation right now where my husband has been out of work for awhile and I don't work either. The church has helped us tremendously financially. I don't know where we'd be without the church, they have provided so much help. There is also much help available as far as employment. I would recommend if this is really what you want that you go to your bishop or stake president and ask for advice on your situation. I know this is a very hard situation for you and you feel you have no options but just look into it. I think if you wanted to become a member of the church, the church would help you two out as much as they could. Having the church in your life is a tremendous blessing and I really encourage you to look at all your options.
crytsprospect Posted March 10, 2008 Report Posted March 10, 2008 I have a wall with all kinds of sayings some biblical etc. heres one for you " All things work together for those who love the lord." Father in Heaven knows the desires of your heart and all will work out in time, answers will come just be open and ready for them. peace and enlightenment to you all
prisonchaplain Posted March 10, 2008 Report Posted March 10, 2008 Kona, do you believe there is a God? If so, knowing the most intimate details of your situation, does He want you to live together as you are? I would encourage you to base your answer, not merely on what you think is right, but also upon reliable sources you trust (Scriptures, etc.). If God's best will means sacrificing income, do you not believe He will help you find other means of support?
skalenfehl Posted March 10, 2008 Report Posted March 10, 2008 kona, I've only lived 38 short years, but through my trials and ordeals in life I have learned one important and incontrovertible truth: 1 Ne. 3: 7 7 And it came to pass that I, Nephi, said unto my father: I will go and do the things which the Lord hath commanded, for I know that the Lord giveth no commandments unto the children of men, save he shall prepare a way for them that they may accomplish the thing which he commandeth them.If you prove to the Lord of your willingness to endure the test of your faith, He will prove to you His ability to see you through it. That is my witness to you, brother. Best wishes.
kona0197 Posted March 10, 2008 Author Report Posted March 10, 2008 My knee-jerk reaction is: It isn't the church that's asking, it is the Lord. Obviously, you love your girlfriend's money more than you love the Lord.No - it's the fact that I need a roof over my head more than I need to be a member.
kona0197 Posted March 10, 2008 Author Report Posted March 10, 2008 The Church can help.-a-trainBeen there tried that. No help is coming from them at all. Quite a turn off.
kona0197 Posted March 10, 2008 Author Report Posted March 10, 2008 The church can and will help you if this is truly the desire of your heart. We are in a situation right now where my husband has been out of work for awhile and I don't work either. The church has helped us tremendously financially. I don't know where we'd be without the church, they have provided so much help. There is also much help available as far as employment.We have seen the Bishop. The only thing they said is to get married. They will not help us financially at all. not even with an overdue power bill. I don't need help with employment I'm happy with my job. On the flip side I don't think my girlfriend wants to go off Social Security and I don't make enough to get my own place. I've even quit going to Sacrament as I see no point in it. If I can't be a member I'll just stay home. Talking to my girlfriend about marriage is like pulling teeth yet she told the Bishop she wanted to be married...
WANDERER Posted March 10, 2008 Report Posted March 10, 2008 So what are the options you've looked at already that are not working out? Aaaah I see. I;ve clicked on the LDS welfare pages before. A longterm solution would be better than a temporary helping hand: miniminal rental accomodation or something.
kona0197 Posted March 10, 2008 Author Report Posted March 10, 2008 None. Like I said I'm waiting for her to make up her mind.
tree Posted March 10, 2008 Report Posted March 10, 2008 matthew 6:30-34. seek ye first the kingdom of heaven, and all will be given you. god says he will ( and he does)take care of his own. that doesnt mean life wont get tough from time to time, it happens to us all. but its what and how you handle it when it happens, trust in god with all your heart ,always especially when times are tough, i promise you heavenly father will see you through. i was born 3lbs -14 oz. my mom was told i wouldnt live 2wks. max. but when i did they said i would be some what retarded, yes i have some mental illness and some learning disabilities but , since i came to heavenly father i am being healed , a little at a time but i am getting there. i didnt know how i would make ends meet but with half a will power and an awesome heavenly father giving me the courage to try ive always made it. if i can do it ,i am sure you can, plus i had two kids to support. now i have a loving husband that supports me and my daughter ( now 7yrs old) my son is now 18 and has his own house on his dads land. we are not rich but we are comfortable, god seen i needed a proper help mate, and now i have one. seek god first and i promise you wont regret it !
kona0197 Posted March 10, 2008 Author Report Posted March 10, 2008 So you are saying to seek the kingdom of heaven I have to become homeless and jobless? No go. Too much. Not gonna happen.
WANDERER Posted March 10, 2008 Report Posted March 10, 2008 Tree I hear you...but I'll bet there were times when you didn't think things would work out. It's good to be reminded that they do : ). Kona here's hoping that a blessing comes your way.
kona0197 Posted March 10, 2008 Author Report Posted March 10, 2008 Yeah thanks. Talk about a catch 22 right?
LDSgirl Posted March 10, 2008 Report Posted March 10, 2008 Kona, I will pray for your situation to improve. Please consider continuing to go to church....it's not just a place for "perfect" people to worship the Lord, but it is a place for everyone!
kona0197 Posted March 10, 2008 Author Report Posted March 10, 2008 Church is no place for a guy that has been investigating for over a year. I feel out of place and others remind me that I'm not a member all the time.
jadams_4040 Posted March 10, 2008 Report Posted March 10, 2008 You might wonder why after all the things I've said here about investigating the church why I haven't joined the Church. I would like to join. The fact is I just can't.You see it mostly has to do with the Social Security laws. The laws state that should my girlfriend and I get married she would lose her income. She is on Social Security. I only make about 700 a month at work therefore we need that income to survive.The church says we can not become members until we get married as we live together. So as you see I can't become a member.I am NOT willing to let her lose her income and become a member just to end up homeless. So flame on....I still think the church asks to much of us. If you beleive the chrch ask too much of you, then you are not ready to be a member. besides that its not the church that is asking, its the lord, and beleive me when you do "ALL" that he asks us to do, it works out very well indeed, dont worry about the 700 a month or whatever else sort of money issues you might have, this church is not about money it is about receiving more happiness, satisfaction,joy and many,many, blessings,When you do all you can do as commanded, you will rceive the blessings of heavenly father that you cannot even possibly imagine right now. I will tell you without a doubt in any form, this is true, the lord will take care of you "IF"You have the fortitude,faith, and eventually ,"confidence of knowledge" that will only strenghen your testimony, Hence increase your worthyness, and double and triple the blessings you will receive.
kona0197 Posted March 10, 2008 Author Report Posted March 10, 2008 Well I'm happy were I am. Guess I'll look into the reformed LDS church or another Church that can understand peoples problems and let them become members regardless. Besides in the eyes of God we are married. They did not have marriage licenses in the old days why do I need one now?
skalenfehl Posted March 10, 2008 Report Posted March 10, 2008 Adam and Eve did not need a license, but they were married by the sealing power of God's authority for all time and eternity.
kona0197 Posted March 10, 2008 Author Report Posted March 10, 2008 Good point. So why do I need to get a license if the Bishop will marry us? Laws?
Moksha Posted March 10, 2008 Report Posted March 10, 2008 You might wonder why after all the things I've said here about investigating the church why I haven't joined the Church. I would like to join. The fact is I just can't.You see it mostly has to do with the Social Security laws. The laws state that should my girlfriend and I get married she would lose her income. She is on Social Security. I only make about 700 a month at work therefore we need that income to survive.The church says we can not become members until we get married as we live together. So as you see I can't become a member.I am NOT willing to let her lose her income and become a member just to end up homeless. So flame on....I still think the church asks to much of us. You know, a lot of old people have had problems with this Social Security rule for years.
skalenfehl Posted March 10, 2008 Report Posted March 10, 2008 Good point. So why do I need to get a license if the Bishop will marry us? Laws?A bishop can marry you civily but does not hold the keys of the Priesthood to seal you in the bonds of eternal marriage.
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