ryanh

No, not at all. Not sure how you got that. you need to delinate between Same Sex Attraction, and acting on those attractions. Wouldn't you say there is a difference between me being attracted to women other than my wife, and my acting on those attractions? Using procreative powers outside of marriage is wrong, whether straight or not. Marriage in HF's eyes is only between a man and a woman.

Hi, my name is Ryan, and I'm straight. I hope none of you tell my Bishop, but I have a strong attraction to . . . women! It's been a problem most of my life, and has caused me temptation. On second thought, perhaps someone should tell my Bishop to make sure he knows I am at risk of sinning (whether or not the teller knows if I have intent to sin). We all (well, most of us anyway) have romantic attractions to other people. The issue is not orientation, but using procreative powers outside of marriage.

This is illegal in many jurisdictions. Within the US, you have to consult individual state laws to determine if it is a single party consent state or not before recording conversations without the other persons consent. I.e. in UT, you can record any conversation you are involved in. But not so in CA. You must have consent of the other party in CA.

Crazy would be too harsh of a word, but I do find it annoying when very old threads are resurrected without the poster even realizing that the OP was 2+ years prior.

A few random thoughts for you to consider: The other side of the coin of Just_A_Guy's post is that an active LDS man who is intent on building a marriage that is eternal is not so likely to be wanting to join with someone that is 'on the fence'. So, as you already know, you really do need to decide which path you want to follow. It's a little unfortunate to be in the position you are at your age. Whom you marry will be very influential in the direction your life will take. You asked: ..."do i want to be with and marry a mormon?... or does it matter if i can find somone i love who can give me everything but just not the religion asspect of it?..." I think it matters greatly. Having been given the knowledge of eternal marriage, you have a greater responsibility than those that are not aware, to pursue that goal in order to obtain it. Are you sealed to your parents in order that you all can be an eternal family, or is it until death do you part because your father never entered temple to be sealed to your mother? It sounds like the latter. Is that what you want for your future family? Marriage is hard enough with all the differences that two people bring into a relationship from their various upbringing. What a blessing to have similar core beliefs that marriage is sacred, eternal, and should be a priority. Having different 'values' of marriage between the partners seems like fertile ground for problems. Could you find non-LDS men that are committed to marriage? Sure, I think so. But I can tell you that I for one wouldn't have stuck with my marriage as long as I have if it were not for principles taught in the church. Perhaps it would help to analyze specifically why you feel "a little lost in [your] life". Is it because you are not living what you believe to be true? Or is it that you wonder if you desire "sin" (for lack of a better word since we don't know details) more than righteousness? Or is it as simple as you want to see what the future would bring given various choices? Rmorrow, anytime I hear someone lament about wanting to choose right, but continually falling prey to the short-term pleasures despite their intent and beliefs, I can't help but wonder if the individual has ADHD. Please don't take that as a criticism. It's not criticism in the least bit in my mind, but I recognize that there is still a lot of stigma and misunderstanding regarding what ADHD is. Have you ever been diagnosed with ADHD or wondered if it was a possibility? If so, treating it will help immensely in your search for happiness. A final thought - do you want your children to be in your position when they reach age 21, not having as strong of a testimony as they could have had if they had two faithful LDS parents? No pressure (yeah, right), but your choices now will affect them and future generations.

Perhaps it would be helpful to seek out professional help in bringing up the subject and making disclosure (which, I agree, needs to happen in order to move forward). When I was finally ready to confront my sister who sexually abused me as a child, there were therapists and 'mediators' that were experienced in facilitating those types of confrontations. I would expect that there are therapists that do the same for marriage infidelity. I've got to think that even if you didn't utilize a professional to assist, a seasoned marriage therapist could give you some advice on how best to go about it. Of course, the best source of info on how to bring up the subject is HF. Do seek His counsel to find the best way to approach your husband. I do trust that if you are sincerely repenting, He will give you guidance on what is best to help keep the marriage together. He is the greatest advocate of healing and maintaining marriages. Lastly, there are plenty of books and other resources out there to give you some guidance on how to handle “the talk” and how to help your marriage recover from this. One website I am aware of is out of Austrialia – Peter Fox – couple’s therapist. You two have a tough road to travel. But from what I read, it IS possible to travel it and come out the other side with a better, stronger marriage.

Forgive me for interrupting the tangential direction the thread has taken. I wanted to post something related to the OP and responses to the OP.

Yes Pam, it's all about verifible documentation. It is possible, if one is courageous enough and understands the tribulation they will be getting themselves into, to elicit the perpetraitor to put the offers in email, text, or voice mails. BUT, given that the OP mentions member of a Law Society (the irony wasn't lost on me either), I don't think replies regarding how to go about doing this are as important as how to continue to resist the idea of giving in. Janey: what do you want more? Spiritual "success", or the success and advancement of this temporal life?

Wait a minute people - have you ever been involved in a spider's web like this? Advising to start 'bringing things to light' is dangerous advice that could cause the victim a whole lot more harm than inappropriate advances and quid pro quo offers.

Dove, I'm not following something in your post. You had significant, and life-threatening, difficulties prior to ever taking any medication, right? But, if I'm reading correctly, you feel now that if you were to go off the medications, it would be the medications 'fault' that you might be hospitalized again. What am I missing?

I think only the truly ignorant would assume they can understand the situations of others so clearly.

If you want to give Cameron advice, see: http://www.lds.net/forums/advice-board/25375-just-need-some-advice.html

Kwil, I was about your age when I started on antidepressants. I've tried a lot of them to try to find the best fit since then. It's a long process, and you are right - it is trial error. Someday the science will be good enough to match the medicine to our specific deficiencies, but that day is not here yet. Don't be afraid to speak up and tell your Dr if you feel that a particular regimen isn't working right, or the side effects are too great. One thing I have learned is to discuss with the Dr how to make dosage adjustments in-between visits. You have to take charge and find the right dosage. Hopefully your Dr will be willing to take calls between visits and make minor adjustments so the process of finding the right dosages doesn't take so long. Something that almost invariably happens when people begin to feel better with treatment, is they begin to question whether or not they really need the meds. It’s natural, but not always healthy, to want to quit the meds. If you find yourself in that position, and want to see if you can do ok w/o meds, just don’t decide to quit them all together. Taper them back slowly (hopefully with the support of your Dr) and be patient to see if symptoms begin to reappear. Likely they will, but that will provide the evidence you need to realize that, like many of us, you may need to treat this for the remainder of you life. The reality that you may need to treat it for the rest of your life really is not as bad of a thing as it may seem when in the position you are in now. Just be thankful that Heavenly Father has developed modern medicine to provide for treatment so that your life can be more stable than it otherwise would be.

Cameron, as I was reading the April Ensign this morning (trying to catch up on the backlog of issues I haven't had a chance to read), I came across an article that may be of help to you. See: Think About What You Are Thinking About

Yep! Very good deduction of a multifaceted consideration. When I joined the church, it was because I learned the Book of Mormon (BoM) to be true scripture. That conviction that the BoM was true scripture lead me to understand that Joseph Smith (JS) must have been a true prophet and had the vision he said he had. That was sufficient for the time being until I could also gain a testimony that JS was a prophet. Logic and reason appear to have taken you about as far as they can. Our understanding of the truth of the BoM or of JS's calling cannot come by logic. It is time to seek divine guidance as to the truth of these foundational assertions of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I suppose the missionaries have walked you through James 1:5 and Moroni 10:3-5 regarding obtaining an answer to your queries whether or not the BoM and/or JS are true. If not, ask them to do so. It may take time and significant effort to get an answer from our Heavenly Father, but it IS possible. James 1:5 Moroni 10:3-5

Yeah, I'm all about efficiency.

Listened to the last 5 minutes. Very exciting. Greg Rubel sure was yelling! Amazing win over #2!!!

Cameron, Less active or not, I’m sure your Bishop would like to help you overcome this. No, I wasn’t aware about the family, just that you were less active. That does make it tough doesn’t it? I was 16 when baptized. Didn’t have any active family to support me. I know what that’s like. But I trust you can do what is right whether they are active or not. As far as specific scriptures, I have no recommendations. I think what passages to go to is a highly personal thing. Some people find resolve from reading admonitions to repent or reviewing the consequences for sin. Others find greater strength to persevere by reading passages about God’s love and care for us. Dive into them and find what works for you. Perhaps some focused study would be of benefit – go to the topical guide (in between the New Testament and the Book of Mormon in a quadruple combination) and select a topic to review passages on. LDS.org also is a great resource for research and study. Use the search tool to find talks by general authorities regarding porn, addictions, etc, and print them out to read when you need a distraction. Something you may need overall is to nourish your Spirit. Your Spirit may be malnourished right now, and doing what you can to ‘feed’ it will go a long ways in overcoming the ‘flesh’. Also see: Spiritual Nutrients by President James E. FaustAlso, when trying to remove one habit from our lives, it is usually best to replace it with something better. Simply eliminating a habit/additicion is harder than replacing it with something more productive. I'm thinking about more than just reading a scripture or singing a primary song/hymn in order to distract ourselves. I’m meaning whole new habits – healthy ones - that provide us with a valid and compelling interest. Dirt bike riding, model airplanes, fixing up an old car or rebuilding an engine, carpentry, basket weaving or underwater BB stacking. Anything that we find of interest and obtain satisfaction in. Serving in church or the community too. Filling our time with work, service, and wholesome interests makes it much easier to choke out the weeds in our life and keep them from having a place to grow. The best way to keep weeds out of a lawn is to grow a thick, healthy, flourishing lawn.

It also helps me to ponder about how Heavenly Father sees everything. When I'm trying to quit or avoid something, I try to keep in mind how He is omnipresent. A couple pictures could act as reminders of this.

I just became aware of the following article in the January 2009 Ensign. Not sure if you had seen it or not.Bipolar Disorder: My Lessons in Love, Hope, and Peace

Hey Cameron - glad to see you are facing your issues head on and are willing to discuss them out here in the open. Was wondering what was going on and was thinking of sending you a PM. Have you considered talking with your Bishop about it? Living where you live, I can guarantee you won't be the first person he has talked with that has had to fight this. Congrats on the first week. Now, set your goal to make it two, and at that point, to make it three. Break your goals down into manageable pieces that you can focus on. If that means day by day, then do it that way.

Which answers for other people a prophet can receive.

http://www.hugorodier.com/ is a front page, owned by OurHealthCoop.com - another unregistered business in UT, apparently doing business here illegally. When are you going to stop advertising for unregistered/illegal businesses? Cure? Ha ha! You're funny. Perhaps treat. What proof do you have to claim "cure"? If these quack "cures" had a chance of working, word of mouth alone would have caused many real doctors to adopt the cause. There is a reason these things remain on the fringe of mainstream. They are predatory hoping to lure in desperate people. Go advertise elsewhere!

P.S. Your friend Ann Blake Tracy is operating an illegal business. Her registration has been expired for almost four years now. https://secure.utah.gov/bes/action/searchresults Yet, she's still running that scare-tactic aggrandize-the-rare-exception website as if legitimate.

If you "just wanted to get some more input" why are you coming on here sounding like an infomercial for a crystal-gripping homeopathic hippie idea? You're coming on here announcing that people that have legitimate medical imbalances are "exceptions". Pfft! Whatever! I’ll bet you think that legitimate researchers into psychopharmacology are all part of giant conspiracy, don’t you? You fail to realize that there are numerous causes for a person being depressed. Thinking to apply one solution to all people is foolish IMO. People loose all respect in my book when they come on forums saying their agenda is A, when it is clearly showing through to be B. Get real. Go advertise elsewhere.