This may be a ridiculous topic.

[Bini]

But I wanted to share it anyway.

On another forum I frequent, I posted a rant on "I hate teenagers", as a result of encountering the rudest and most inconsiderate group of kids the other day while driving. Now, I acknowledge that not all teens are nightmares but on that particular day, that is how I felt. And "hate" didn't seem too extreme of a word or emotion in that moment. Anyway, the issue that a few people had was with the word "hate" and claimed that regardless of the situation - it's an extreme exaggeration.

Well OK. Maybe so in my particular situation but that doesn't change how I felt at the time. Emotions are feelings that consume all of us. It's not what the emotion is but how you deal with it, no? I think the feeling of hate is just as valid as the feeling of love. And now, I'm just rambling.. So. Why is hating something or someone such an extreme concept to fathom, when you can love just about anything unconditionally without question?

This topic isn't about trying to be the better person. I know that being hateful isn't something you should harbour. The topic is just what I stated above in question. Your thoughts?

[pam]

I think sometimes we take the word hate and call it too extreme. But what is the definition of hate?

To dislike intensely or passionately; feel extreme aversion for or extreme hostility for

To be unwilling; dislike

But I do agree it's more with how you deal with the emotion than the emotion itself.

[Iggy]

Hate is an honest emotion. It is the opposite of love.

I hate lima beans. I love asparagus.

I hate bigots. I love compassionate peoples.

My mother always said she would prefer if her children hated her rather than be indifferent towards her, as hate is an honest emotion.

my ramblings.

In my opinion- loathe and detest are much stronger words than hate.

Edited October 24, 2009 by Iggy
more ramblings - - -

[prisonchaplain]

You don't have to like your enemies...just love them. And yes, sometimes it's a love-hate relationship. We love people as God's creation, but we hate what they do--over and over again, 70X7! Bini, would it be fair to say you "Love the sinner and hate the sin?"

I dealt with this last week. Over the course of several weeks I've had inmates sign up to come to church, just so they could talk with their friends. They are separated in our jail, and it's one way they can get together. To me, this is highly offensive. I've had to mention several times, from the lecturn, that the talking needs to stop. This last week the talking got rather loud during sacrament, because those who chose not to participate, figured they could talk while the others went up.

Five minutes later, I'm giving the lesson, and two of them just kept at it. I looked at them, put the finger to my lips, and they would not stop. So, I halted the service, and asked them out, and sent them back upstairs.

I don't hate them, but I hated what they did. And though they may have missed some gospel teaching, I have to hope they received a worthwhile lesson. Now, these guys are in their 30s...but the behavior is definitely adolescent. The one guy, as he was going up, even quipped bitingly, "At least I know Jesus' forgives me!" No guilt for his behavior...just insinuate that the pastor is cold, unforgiving and harsh. Love the soul, hate the 'tude!

[Tarnished]

I find myself often saying that I hate people, a very vague blanket term. The truth is that I like most people that I get to know, however in general I hate the way people tend to act. I have had people lecture me about using the word hate as well. But the truth of the matter is, I use the word hate to express an intense emotion of dislike toward someone or something else. It does not mean that I am going to hold that emotion against that person or thing forever, just in the heat of the moment. I often use it as a way to express the emotion and then let it go. Though it does carry a connotation that is stronger than I really feel at the time I personally feel that my usage of it is accurate and I don't plan on discontinuing my usage of it any time soon. If people hate the connotation then they can just deal with it.

Besides, I usually only use the word around someone who I have gotten to know quite well. Usually they can handle my quirks at that point.

[mightynancy]

I don't "do" hate because it's so ridiculously ineffective.

[Dravin]

I don't "do" hate because it's so ridiculously ineffective.

It's no more ineffective than love. Both emotions need to be coupled with action to get something done and be 'effective'. Of course we're generally more proud after the fact of the actions motivated and coupled with love than those that are motivated and coupled with hate. Actually the funny thing is depending on how you view effective; what is more effective at getting a snotty teenager to stop talking?

1. Love them and kindly ask them to stop?

2. Hate them and beat them unconscious (or even dead) with a lead pipe?

Of course option 2 carries with it some horrendous consequences but it's highly effective at achieving your goal (getting them to stop talking).

Edit: I don't want anyone to think I'm in favor of hate or think it is a healthy helpful emotion, but it can be highly effective as a motivator. Just look at the KKK or the LDS expulsion from Missouri/Illinois (trying not to invoke Godwin), things were accomplished, horrible things but things nonetheless, motivated by hate. On the flip side we have one of the greatest (if not the greatest) things ever accomplished, the atonement, motivated by love. My point is just that emotions can motivate, hate as well as love.

Edited October 25, 2009 by Dravin

[jadams_4040]

But I wanted to share it anyway.

On another forum I frequent, I posted a rant on "I hate teenagers", as a result of encountering the rudest and most inconsiderate group of kids the other day while driving. Now, I acknowledge that not all teens are nightmares but on that particular day, that is how I felt. And "hate" didn't seem too extreme of a word or emotion in that moment. Anyway, the issue that a few people had was with the word "hate" and claimed that regardless of the situation - it's an extreme exaggeration.

Well OK. Maybe so in my particular situation but that doesn't change how I felt at the time. Emotions are feelings that consume all of us. It's not what the emotion is but how you deal with it, no? I think the feeling of hate is just as valid as the feeling of love. And now, I'm just rambling.. So. Why is hating something or someone such an extreme concept to fathom, when you can love just about anything unconditionally without question?

This topic isn't about trying to be the better person. I know that being hateful isn't something you should harbour. The topic is just what I stated above in question. Your thoughts?

It does get very hard sometimes but the word forgiveness; will bless your life in many ways.:)

[Bini]

It does get very hard sometimes but the word forgiveness; will bless your life in many ways.:)

^ You missed the point entirely. :)

Yes it would be fair to say that, prisonchaplain. Thanks for all your thoughts everyone :]

[Jamie123]

It does get very hard sometimes but the word forgiveness; will bless your life in many ways.:)

Tell that to Grouchy Smurf!

I hate Smurfs!

[Jamie123]

I don't "do" hate because it's so ridiculously ineffective.

I hate to say it Nancy, but I think you may be right!

[Vort]

Why is hating something or someone such an extreme concept to fathom, when you can love just about anything unconditionally without question?

Great question. It appears our society has branded hate as "toxic" since at least WWII. Not "hatred", but "hate". I don't know what to make of this. It does seem as if hate eats away at and cankers the souls of those who harbor it. Hating people does seem at least somewhat in contradiction to the divine nature. On the other hand, the scriptures speak of God hating some people.

If hatred is an honest emotion, I am not sure it per se can be bad. But perhaps due to social conditioning, I don't quite see how it is compatible with Christ-like charity, either.

Thought: Maybe the equivalency between "hate" as an emotion and "love" as an emotion is false. Calling them both "emotions" and making them two sides to the same emotional coin may distort the real nature of what it is to hate or to love.

[Generally_Me]

I have felt true hate for one person once, and since then have not used the word "hate" lightly. I despise, detest, abhore; I am irritated by, and feel disgust.

I also don't use the word "love" lightly, though I use it a lot more than "hate".

Thankfully I've been able to move to a healthier place since those initial hate feelings. But since I felt true hate, it irritates me to see people use the word lightly. Perhaps the people who read your rant feel the same, that you were overreacting in using a word that wasn't a true description of what they thought you felt? I mean, for example, the person for whom I felt hate. I wanted to own and destroy every part of him, then bring him back to life and do it again, until I became bored; then send his soul to the shredder. I breathed and existed in hate. It's a difficult thing to describe, but hopefully that gives you a basic idea as to the depth of my feelings for that person.

If I still had those feelings (thankfully I do not) and I had someone say "These teens cut me off on the road, I absolutely hate them!" I would be annoyed. After all, you are cheapening the meaning of MY personal hatred by claiming you hate someone whose name you do not even know, and will probably never see again.