Sealing to Divorced Parents?

[Tephrochr]

I've been wondering for awhile now about my situation and my parents with regard to a temple sealing.

So my parents are divorced and my mom, myself and a few other family members joined the church afterward. My question is whether I can be sealed to my mother and my father individually, without having them sealed to each other. Any thoughts?

[pam]

My understanding is not while they are alive. Sealings are done to parents who are married.

After their death you can do temple work and have them sealed to each other and then be sealed to them as well.

[Maureen]

...After their death you can do temple work and have them sealed to each other and then be sealed to them as well.

Really? Even if they are divorced?

M.

[Tephrochr]

Pam: Yeah, I know they'll have to be dead. As much as I love them and hope they'll join the church and/or be in full activity, I understand the reality of it is slim.

But postmortem, do they have to be sealed to each other in order to be sealed to me? I ask this because I know my mother's wishes are that I not have them sealed after she's dead (which I won't unless otherwise prompted (can't say for sure, people change), although I have no objection to my children doing the work for them).

Maureen: We do temple work for people who were members of other churches when they were alive, and like with that it's their decision whether or not they acknowledge the work we do. I imagine it's the same for postmortem marriages of formerly divorced couples.

[pam]

Really? Even if they are divorced?

M.

My understanding is you can't be sealed to individual parents.

[Maureen]

My understanding is you can't be sealed to individual parents.

I understand that marriage is necessary for a sealing to take place. I would think that that would be the same even in a proxy situation. Could children or grandchildren do a proxy sealing on divorced parents?

M.

[Moksha]

My understanding is you can't be sealed to individual parents.

This seems rather like a fly in the ointment of eternal family relationships since divorce is both a reality at this point in history and is common as well.

Children would want to be sealed to both parents if they had a good relationship with both. I like to think that God will transcend any earthbound bureaucratic barriers that maintain otherwise and provide that family linkage.

[Tephrochr]

And I like the way you think, Moshka.

[Hemidakota]

As Pam stated, there is NO SEALINGS to individual parents. The highest order within the Celestial Kingdom requires both parents - male and female.

You need to wait until one of your parents remarry in the temple in order to be sealed to the parent.

[FunkyTown]

This is a tough call, Teffie.

God intended for families to be eternal. We are to be linked both to our past and our future. You want both your mother's comforting words and your father to be able to wrap his arms around you and tell you he loves you.

It can happen. You aren't alone. Your mother's wishes aside, you need to know God loves you and that things will work out. It might not be possible right now, but God's plan isn't going to be frustrated by mortal frailties: Yours, mine or your parents. :)

[ttribe]

Really? Even if they are divorced?

M.

That's correct. I am in a similar situation. My Mom was a convert and my Dad was never active. They were divorced when I was five and my Dad passed away about the time that I turned 30. I've since done all of his temple work except for sealings. After my Mom passes, I can have the sealing ordinance performed amongst the three of us.

Please note, however, that even if all parties involved have since accepted all ordinances, this does not FORCE them to "live together eternally." I find it unimaginable that heaven is a place where people who didn't like each other much in the hear and now must live together forever. Nevertheless, the key is that the sealing is considered an essential ordinance. Consequently, I will see that it is performed for everyone involved. How the "together forever" part works in the hereafter is completely up to the only Perfect Judge to live on this Earth; and I happen to trust Him implicitly to get it right.

[bl8tant]

I had a slightly different question: what happens to my existing sealing once my STBX and I divorce? I mean, I know nothing happens to our sealing until we request that it be dissolved, but what does that mean to my sealing to my kids?

Like Moksha, I prefer to believe that the Lord will take care of these kinds of administrivia, but that doesn't stop me from wondering.

[martybess]

I had a slightly different question: what happens to my existing sealing once my STBX and I divorce? I mean, I know nothing happens to our sealing until we request that it be dissolved, but what does that mean to my sealing to my kids?

Like Moksha, I prefer to believe that the Lord will take care of these kinds of administrivia, but that doesn't stop me from wondering.

I think even if you have your sealing annulled your children are still sealed to both parents.

[Maureen]

That's correct. I am in a similar situation. My Mom was a convert and my Dad was never active. They were divorced when I was five and my Dad passed away about the time that I turned 30. I've since done all of his temple work except for sealings. After my Mom passes, I can have the sealing ordinance performed amongst the three of us....

So then it does not matter about any deceased family members marital status while alive? Proxy sealings can be done for anyone?

M.

[ttribe]

So then it does not matter about any deceased family members marital status while alive? Proxy sealings can be done for anyone?

M.

You can seal couples who were previously married to each other in life (even if they later divorce), and then their children to them. You cannot, however, seal people who were not married in life (at some point).

[JThimm88]

But postmortem, do they have to be sealed to each other in order to be sealed to me? I ask this because I know my mother's wishes are that I not have them sealed after she's dead (which I won't unless otherwise prompted (can't say for sure, people change), although I have no objection to my children doing the work for them).

My husband and I had a discussion about this today, actually; though your mother's wishes are that you not have her and your father sealed after they've passed away, you could (should?) still do the work for them. From my understanding, though we do the work for the deceased, they still have the agency to choose to accept it -- for example, if you did baptismal work for an individual and they accepted it and thus joined the church, you could still do their temple work for them, but they might still choose to NOT accept that work done, thus discontinuing their progression.

Either way, as long as someone's doing the work (whether it be you or your children), that's what's important, that we're giving them the opportunity. :)

[pam]

My husband and I had a discussion about this today, actually; though your mother's wishes are that you not have her and your father sealed after they've passed away, you could (should?) still do the work for them. From my understanding, though we do the work for the deceased, they still have the agency to choose to accept it -- for example, if you did baptismal work for an individual and they accepted it and thus joined the church, you could still do their temple work for them, but they might still choose to NOT accept that work done, thus discontinuing their progression.

Either way, as long as someone's doing the work (whether it be you or your children), that's what's important, that we're giving them the opportunity. :)

I absolutely agree with you. It's not for us to decide if we think they will accept it or not. The important thing is that we do the work so that we ARE giving them the opportunity to accept it.

I heard in a talk once to stop and think about the millions of people who are just waiting for someone to do their work so they can accept it. That's what we need to be doing.

[Hemidakota]

I think even if you have your sealing annulled your children are still sealed to both parents.

If the sealing is annulled the adopted parent who becomes sealed to the biological parent can adopt the children and the children can be sealed to the adopted parent. If the living biological parent allows the adoption the children are now part of this new family.