dahlia Posted March 7, 2012 Report Share Posted March 7, 2012 I heard this and wondered if it was true (I looked at LDS Newsroom on FB and didn't see anything) - Single sisters 60 and older will be able to have the missionaries in their homes without another male. Is this true? It would be great; I know several single sisters around that age (and I am fast approaching it myself), who would like to do more with the missionaries but can't due to the need to find another male for meals, etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skippy740 Posted March 8, 2012 Report Share Posted March 8, 2012 Missionaries are given their rules through the "White Handbook" and through their mission president.The mission president has the authority to "override" the white handbook for their mission only.I don't know if the white handbook has been updated since my missionary days, but on page 25 of my copy is states:Never be alone with or associate inappropriately with anyone of the opposite sex. Flirting or dating is not tolerated. You are not to telephone, write to, or accept calls or letters from anyone of the opposite sex living within or near mission boundaries.You and your companion may visit single members or investigators of the opposite sex, including divorced persons, only when accompanied by a couple, or another adult member of your sex. Try to teach single investigators in a member's home, or have missionaries of the same sex teach them. Always follow this rule, even if the situation seems harmless. Well, not only did it state the rule, but it also re-emphasizes the follow the rule "even if".Again, mission presidents can override the white handbook and give specific circumstances... but only for the mission that they preside over.On my mission (back 10-12 years ago) I followed this rule as closely as I could. I could only recall "violating" this rule once. The day before transfers, we had set up a dinner appointment with a couple we were teaching. I went to transfers and picked up my greenie. He and I went to the dinner appointment. (Again, these were investigators.) Well, the male wasn't there. It was just her. Well, she couldn't possibly know our rules. So we ate, but we ate outside on the porch. We did the best we could to be obedient and maintain the spirit of who we are and represented.No, they didn't get baptized, but I did trade his copy of an anti-LDS book with a Book of Mormon! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blackmarch Posted March 8, 2012 Report Share Posted March 8, 2012 I heard this and wondered if it was true (I looked at LDS Newsroom on FB and didn't see anything) -Single sisters 60 and older will be able to have the missionaries in their homes without another male. Is this true? It would be great; I know several single sisters around that age (and I am fast approaching it myself), who would like to do more with the missionaries but can't due to the need to find another male for meals, etc.Not until they change the handbook of instructions, or have recieved permission from the mission president to do so.This is where having senior couples in a mission field really helps out a lot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted March 8, 2012 Report Share Posted March 8, 2012 Not until they change the handbook of instructions, or have recieved permission from the mission president to do so.This is where having senior couples in a mission field really helps out a lot.Don't forget the sister missionaries, though they have a different issue (single men). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rameumptom Posted March 8, 2012 Report Share Posted March 8, 2012 I have not heard of any changes. The problem is, some 60 year old women do not look 60, and while the event may be innocent, it could cause the perception that something is going on. We are to avoid the appearance of evil to ensure we do not lead other on-lookers from thinking something is going on in the Church. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FunkyTown Posted March 8, 2012 Report Share Posted March 8, 2012 All the single ladies, put your hands up! If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pam Posted March 8, 2012 Report Share Posted March 8, 2012 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rayhale Posted March 8, 2012 Report Share Posted March 8, 2012 The rule of not being alone with the opposite sex, made me thinking if the rule applies to someone who is the same sex as you, but is homosexual? I would think it does. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vort Posted March 8, 2012 Report Share Posted March 8, 2012 No, it does not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just_A_Guy Posted March 8, 2012 Report Share Posted March 8, 2012 All I know is, for a while my 94-year-old widowed grandmother's local elders were filling their service hours by doing yard work for her every other week or so; and then (supposedly) the mission president told them to stop. Single lady, and all . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maureen Posted March 8, 2012 Report Share Posted March 8, 2012 I have not heard of any changes. The problem is, some 60 year old women do not look 60, and while the event may be innocent, it could cause the perception that something is going on. We are to avoid the appearance of evil to ensure we do not lead other on-lookers from thinking something is going on in the Church. Whether older women look their age or not; I can't imagine why young men in their twenties visiting, teaching or having a home cooked meal with a single woman old enough to be their grandmother could possibly have any kind of evil appearance. M. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beefche Posted March 8, 2012 Report Share Posted March 8, 2012 I learned on my mission that alot of the rules I thought were "stupid" were placed there for the weakest of those who could be called missionaries (to paraphrase a scripture). Unfortunately, a lot of the "dumber" rules were in place because there was an issue with that at some time in the missions of the world. I will also say that regardless of how dumb you think a rule is, the Lord loves the obedient. Anyone remember the story of Moses and the brass serpent? What a "dumb" rule that was--look at a fake snake. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vort Posted March 8, 2012 Report Share Posted March 8, 2012 Whether older women look their age or not; I can't imagine why young men in their twenties visiting, teaching or having a home cooked meal with a single woman old enough to be their grandmother could possibly have any kind of evil appearance. Does the phrase "Gooooo, COUGARS!!" mean anything to you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maureen Posted March 8, 2012 Report Share Posted March 8, 2012 Does the phrase "Gooooo, COUGARS!!" mean anything to you? Yes, they are words that fans of the BYU college football team would scream. M. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just_A_Guy Posted March 8, 2012 Report Share Posted March 8, 2012 Maureen, I believe Vort is obliquely referring to this recent Utah news story. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Echo2002 Posted March 9, 2012 Report Share Posted March 9, 2012 I read the news story you posted, how stupid! When someone says their mascot is the Cougar I'm not thinking about an older woman going after a younger guy, I think of the animal. Even though a 19 year old may not flirt with a 60 year old I know some 60 year old's that would flirt with a 19 or 20 year old. Especially if it were an older single man and a young female missionary. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yehshen Posted March 9, 2012 Report Share Posted March 9, 2012 I'm not going to debate the wisdom of this rule. However, I am a 50 something single woman who joined the church last November. This rule substantially interfered with scheduling meetings with missionaries, as our ward had no sister missionaries. And no one explained it to me. I couldn't figure out why there were all these last minute cancellations of appointments, and frankly thought the missionaries were either very disorganized or didn't really care. Well, and then I found out what the deal was, and for the first time in my life wondered if I was really a cougar...if maybe I was inadvertently sending out these sexual signals. And then I told my non-member friends, and we all laughed. So, my point is that if the rule is out there, it might be good to let the investigators know about it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daybreak79 Posted March 9, 2012 Report Share Posted March 9, 2012 Just_A_Guy: On my mission we had a similar situation as to that of your grandmother's so we turned it into a zone service project for who ever wanted to participate. We would usually have 4 companionships there taking care of whatever needed to be done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
volgadon Posted March 10, 2012 Report Share Posted March 10, 2012 I served in Russia, we were allowd to meet with the older ladies alone Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HEthePrimate Posted March 10, 2012 Report Share Posted March 10, 2012 Does the phrase "Gooooo, COUGARS!!" mean anything to you?Would that we had a "Laugh" button for occasions like this! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HEthePrimate Posted March 10, 2012 Report Share Posted March 10, 2012 All I know is, for a while my 94-year-old widowed grandmother's local elders were filling their service hours by doing yard work for her every other week or so; and then (supposedly) the mission president told them to stop. Single lady, and all . . . Please excuse me while I roll my eyes for a few minutes... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FunnySheila Posted March 11, 2012 Report Share Posted March 11, 2012 Ugh, it's frustrating for me as a single mother having to always have to have another person present when the missionaries visit. I can understand the rules, but it's frustrating, especially when the other person requested to be present is someone I don't know well. It's especially frustrating when they can't find someone and have to cancel. Especially when they have to cancel dinner because so-and-so can't make it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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