Daybreak79 Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 I don't follow this blog (or any blog for that matter), but a relative of mine posted it on Facebook and I liked it so I thought I would share it with all of you. http://mylifeasacraig.blogspot.com/2014/06/modest-is-not-hottest.html Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 It would be more accurate to say, "Modest is more desirable to men with LDS (or similar) values towards modesty." but it'd be a horrible soundbite, and thus accuracy falls prey to being catchy (as happens with a lot of nice little snappy phrases). Backroads 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Folk Prophet Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 At first I thought this was going to be an anti-modesty rant...and I was all riled up to respond. But I actually totally agreed with it. Very interesting. applepansy and Daybreak79 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 Meh. I'm modest. And I'm hot. That girl has some points but they're missing the mark. Hot is yours. You get to define it. Ads (mistakenly refered to as adds in the blog) do not define Hot for you. They define Hot for them. Which is not you. The great thing about being married is - my husband has the exact definition of Hot as I do. So, don't change your definition of Hot for your future husband. The guy who has the same definition of Hot as you gets to be on that short list of prospective husbands... and that's the one thing those runway models chasing after my to-be-husband couldn't understand... they look at me with funny looks wondering how my future husband chose a 5-foot-nothing Catholic-school woman over their tall, skinny, barely there fashionable selves. They thought themselves Hot. Well, their definition didn't match my husband's - so poor them, yeay me. And no - Hot is not long walks... that's not hot. That's romantic. Two completely different things. Okay, so if you're walking in June in Florida, it can be hot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Folk Prophet Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 To be hot, a desire to be hot, a desire to be seen as hot, etc., is rooted in vanity. Modesty is rooted in humility. They are, at their core meaning, opposites. Backroads, applepansy, Wingnut and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 To be hot, a desire to be hot, a desire to be seen as hot, etc., is rooted in vanity. Modesty is rooted in humility. They are, at their core meaning, opposites. I don't see it that way. I desire to be hot, just like I married a hot guy. Because, at the end of the day, if you don't like looking at the face you wake up to every morning, life is going to suck. Hot is merely accepting that there is a physical side to things that one cannot just run over in their humility. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 I don't seeing how a wife desiring to be sexually appealing to her husband is anymore, of necessity, rooted in vanity than a wife desiring to be a good mother to he husband's children is rooted in vanity.Or a husband desiring to be a good provider or spiritual leader to his wife*. Could these things be sourced in vanity if they're being desired so one can suffuse themselves with pride over them? Sure, but of a necessity being rooted in excessive pride or admiration of one's achievements? No. *Even more so being these things. Backroads 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Folk Prophet Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 Because, at the end of the day, if you don't like looking at the face you wake up to every morning, life is going to suck. So...ugly people are doomed to a sucky life huh? Leah, faith4 and jerome1232 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dravin Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 So...ugly people are doomed to a sucky life huh?Ugly is in the eye of the beholder. One would hope one's spouse doesn't think they're ugly. If one's spouse does think they are ugly, I daresay that does suck. Backroads 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mordorbund Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 So...ugly people are doomed to a sucky life huh? They might be. If only there was some way to instill a culture that valued other aspects of attractiveness than what's shown by Madison Ave. Something like "It's more attractive (maybe even most attractive) to carry the quiet confidence that is borne by knowing you are a child of God with a divine nature - to wear your self-respect like it was the latest fashion (for ultimately, it is the finale of fashion)." Yeah, that's good. Now how can I make it catchier?.... Maybe something like "mode-" aw crap!! The Folk Prophet 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lakumi Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 They might be. If only there was some way to instill a culture that valued other aspects of attractiveness than what's shown by 5th Ave. Something like "It's more attractive (maybe even most attractive) to carry the quiet confidence that is borne by knowing you are a child of God with a divine nature - to wear your self-respect like it was the latest fashion (for ultimately, it is the finale of fashion)." Yeah, that's good. Now how can I make it catchier?.... Maybe something like "mode-" aw crap!! you can't beat a slogan, no matter how hard you try! mordorbund 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Traveler Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 While my wife and I were raising our family we took to white water rafting as an activity and for what is now 20 years we have annually taken a week long camping rafting trip. As our children grew older friends were invited to join us and as our children became involved in courtships future partners join us. It is interesting what a week camping without a shower or bath does to one's appearance. Not to create stereotypes but the individuals that are much to do about "looks" are usually so wrapped up in maintaining themselves that they are not much help with the communal chores needed to keep the rigorous activities going. In short the purity little girls that keep their makeup perfect are a pain and a bother. Plus; until the make is fixed just right they are not so stunning. Some popular boys also become a pain. It is interesting that many "good looking" individuals expect to be treated for their looks rather than their general contributions. It was often interesting to watch the plain ladies that during the week became much more popular with the guys and how that affected the dynamics of the social pecking order. More than once an engagement was broken. It became kind of a litmus test for our children and their friends to bring prospective partners on the river. One of my sons is involved in the Hollywood seen and a number of Hollywood types have joined us on the river with mixed results. One Hollywood lady had never been camping and without makeup fell in love with the adventure - and changed her whole outlook on life. One fellow after the adventure commented with amazement how some people after the week are not so fun and how some - even their looks start to grow on you. As a side note - my wife and daughters all look stunning with or without makeup and my daughters are to this day the best river guides. Both daughters married alpha males but on the river there is no doubt who is in charge. But the biggest joke is how it is that my wife - so obviously hot - ended up with such a nerd that is 1/4 inch shorter than her. Irishcolleen, The Folk Prophet, Backroads and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Traveler Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 So...ugly people are doomed to a sucky life huh? Not true - I have a wonderful wife and life!! applepansy and Daybreak79 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarginOfError Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 So...ugly people are doomed to a sucky life huh?By objective, measurable standards...yes. "ugly" people generally have lower lifetime pay, lower job satisfaction, and lower happiness scores than their more attractive counterparts. However, that isn't a causal relationship. The sucky life aspect is created by the prejudices of the more attractive crowd. In short, attractive people are jerks. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lakumi Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 By objective, measurable standards...yes. "ugly" people generally have lower lifetime pay, lower job satisfaction, and lower happiness scores than their more attractive counterparts. However, that isn't a causal relationship. The sucky life aspect is created by the prejudices of the more attractive crowd. In short, attractive people are jerks. :) One would think I could have had at least some great looks since I have no social skills, but alas twas not the case. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarginOfError Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 With respect to the article, the author sounds like a teenage bride. She has promise though. Give her ten years and perhaps she'll be able to articulate more mature and profound ideas. The core of what she's getting at is something I've seen discussed before. The "modest is hottest" slogan fails in that it still places cultural expectations on behavior over individuality. And it still places physical attraction over personality. Backroads, The Folk Prophet and Daybreak79 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarginOfError Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 One would think I could have had at least some great looks since I have no social skills, but alas twas not the case.Try make up. Just leave the make up at home when one of Traveler's sons takes you camping with his family Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lakumi Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 Try make up. Just leave the make up at home when one of Traveler's sons takes you camping with his family Well unless you want me to look like someone from Rocky Horror Picture Show, I'd rather not, being a male and all. Backroads 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarginOfError Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 To be hot, a desire to be hot, a desire to be seen as hot, etc., is rooted in vanity. Modesty is rooted in humility. They are, at their core meaning, opposites. I disagree. I think every man and woman should make it a point to look good naked. That doesn't mean you have to show yourself off in that condition, but if you look good naked, odds are you'll feel better both emotionally and physically. I would go so far as to guarantee that if you look good naked, your quality of life improves. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarginOfError Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 Well unless you want me to look like someone from Rocky Horror Picture Show, I'd rather not, being a male and all.Fine. Spoil all my fun. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lakumi Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 Fine. Spoil all my fun.the doll is a girl but I seldom bring them camping or anything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Folk Prophet Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 I disagree. I think every man and woman should make it a point to look good naked. That doesn't mean you have to show yourself off in that condition, but if you look good naked, odds are you'll feel better both emotionally and physically. I would go so far as to guarantee that if you look good naked, your quality of life improves. I agree that everyone should make such effort. It is the why they should make the effort that I'm concerned with. Backroads, applepansy and Daybreak79 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 I agree that everyone should make such effort. It is the why they should make the effort that I'm concerned with. Hopefully it wouldn't be to fit somebody else's definition of what it means to be Hot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 3, 2014 Report Share Posted June 3, 2014 Just a note... Do y'all remember Christina Applegate? People of the 90's put her up on the pedestal as the queen of all hotness. Do you know that she thinks she's ugly because she has the common-among-Irish short legs? How about Julia Roberts. Many a teenager has had her poster on their bedroom walls. She was riddled with insecurity because she thinks she doesn't have a "shape" and thinks she's a stick-figure. And there's Soleil Moon-frye... the super cute Punky Brewster who grew up to be super Hot... She went into extreme depression cycle because she thinks her boobs are too big. And, of course, there's the long list of celebrities battling anorexia nervosa - Kate Beckinsale, Tracy Gold, Jane Fonda, Calista Flockhart, Sally Field, Justine Bateman, Christina Ricci, one of the Olsen twins... and on and on and on. These are people who hang their definition of Hotness on other people's definitions... It's not just for the "ugly" folks... it's an equal opportunity destroyer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quin Posted June 4, 2014 Report Share Posted June 4, 2014 Huh. I always get hit on the most when I look like I've been tied by rope to the back of a truck and driven around face down through cactus. And I always think to myself; 'What is WRONG with men?' Q Backroads 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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